Although this is the story of Clover, a 36-year-old death doula, it is by no means a downer. I enjoyed learning what a death doula does--calmly guiding one person at a time through the last days of life with dignity and peace, listening to their regrets and confessions with no judgment, and helping to work through any unresolved issues, always letting the client set their own terms. But I also loved the in-depth portrait of Clover herself, someone who hasn't allowed herself to have friends of her own age, establish romantic relationships, or fully accept herself for who she is.

Clover has been interested in death since she witnessed the demise of her kindergarten teacher, and as an adult she has traveled abroad to learn about death customs and traditions in other countries, written her master's thesis on thanatology (the study of death), and visited death cafes. She has even honored many of her clients' regrets by experiencing activities they said they wished they had done. But none of it could completely make up for the fact that she was not there at the death of her beloved grandfather, who had raised her since her inattentive parents died in an accident when she was six.

Along the way, Clover realizes she has made her own life too restricted, keeping her feelings locked inside herself, and her half-hearted attempts to change have always been thwarted. No one seemed to want to be around someone who is that involved with death. But taking on a client who had blazed the trail for female photojournalists and reluctantly turned away from the love of her life inspires Clover to make some life-changing decisions, take on seemingly impossible tasks, and open herself up to finding love. I found all of the supporting characters to be distinct, memorable, and equally as well drawn as Clover herself. And I had a lot to think about after reading Clover's story. Debut author Mikki Brammer is one to watch.

My thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for the opportunity to read and provide an honest review of this book.

I deeply enjoyed this book's ability to weave grief and joy. It was a book that felt like opening up after a long, hard day and allowed me to laugh, cry, and process my emotions. I recommend this book to anyone in need of a hug, who needs to remember the joys of life, and who wants a fast-paced read.

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for allowing me access to this ARC!

The Collected Regrets of Clover follows a 30 year old death doula through her experiences with both her job, and her newly found social life. She has always been a loner but when she meets her new client Claudia, things start to change for Clover.

There were some really nice things about this book. I enjoyed learning a little bit about what a death doula is, and I think there were some very poignant passages about both death and grief. Some of the advice offered in this book really hit home with me as someone who has lost several immediate family members. I think the topic of death was handled mostly in a respectful and elegant way that leaves the reader feeling comforted instead of uneasy.

Despite the things I enjoyed about the writing, I really couldn't get into this book. I felt like all the characters were kind of boring and unrelatable. Clover herself seems utterly clueless about how the world and the people who live in it work for someone who literally socializes with people/has incredibly difficult conversations for a living. Also at 36, there's just no way she doesn't understand how to interact with people her age. I feel like the pacing was incredibly slow as well. I had no idea what I was supposed to be getting out of the book until about halfway through because the story just seemed kind of loosely planned. Considering how slow the book moves for the vast majority of the story, the ending seems overly fast paced as if the author was trying for a hasty wrap up. The ending seemed rushed and not entirely well thought out at points (Clover's entire personality takes a total 180), but it did have some very sweet moments for a few of the characters.

This book was definitely not for me, but it had some really great moments that I think a lot of other readers will really enjoy.

I absolutely loved this book. To the author, well done! I found this book very engaging. Clover was easy to identify with. Sometimes she was exasperating and at other times she garnered sympathy. She was a likable character and you just wanted for her.to be happy. In her small way, she does big things. I would read this book twice. Do yourself a favor and read this book. You will enjoy it.

I'm an introvert and I really need to get out more. If any novel convinces me to do so, The Collected Regrets of Clover is that book. Clover is a Death Duala, someone who helps ease dying patients journey from life to death. She keeps three journals of her clients' last words Confessions. Advice. Regrets. At one point she realizes she works with the dying to avoid long-term commitments to living people.

You would think that with all the dying this would be a depressing read. Think again. Clover finally opens up to meeting people who plan to stick around awhile. While some are dying, Clover learns to live.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a kick-start to get people like me out from under the covers and walking forth into the world. Now, if I only had the kind of money Clover has and live in New York City like she does...well, I guess I'll scrounge around with what I've got.

Thanks to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for allowing me to read and review an eARC of The Collected Regrets of Cover.

What a beautiful story! The synopsis makes the book seem like the journey Clover goes on is the story of the book, but it’s really a story of Clover and how a series of events coincidentally occurring at one time forces her out of her comfort zone and to re-examine her life.

I love books where the main character has a unique occupation because it really lends a whole new layer to the story, and a death doula is definitely unique! But what a lovely and comforting concept.

Don’t read this book in one sitting, this book warrants thought and reflection.

Thank you to NetGalley and St Martins Press for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

I must admit the main character of this story hit home with me. We are much alike, personality wise, and even though I am not a death doula I could relate.

This is an interesting look at a profession one does not hear about routinely, but I did enjoy how they can make a dying person’s passing easier. In the midst of death our Clover finally discovers how to live.

Well I just love Clover. Give me a broken female lead character and I’m all in. Interesting take on death and grief. Her story is filled with heart and taking chances. Another perfect ending!

Thanks to NetGalley for an advanced copy.

What a beautiful book it draws you in from the beginning. Excellent read. Five stars.

I adored this book and it was incredibly well written. Clover, while having quite the unusual profession in her dealings with death, is a relatable main character that I was rooting for the whole way through from her first real adult friendship, to her first real kiss. Every reader can draw inspiration from her journey from being completely buttoned up to living a cautiously reckless, well lived life. I’m looking forward to reading more from author Mikki Brammer in the future!

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this incredible book. It was so well written and such a beautiful story. This plot is definitely a slow burn, but you want to savor it. Clover might be one of my favorite characters. Her quirky, awkward, introverted personality was so relatable. A death doula is a position I didn't know existed. But Clover is so fantastic and what a comfort she was to the families. Highly recommend this book!

Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC: What a solid debut novel! Brammer chronicles the isolated Clover who works as a death doula while experiencing a protracted grief of her own. At mid-life, she's in the heart of NYC but so alone. The character was beautifully described and Clover is empathetic and rings true. In the course of caring for a patient, Clover begins to make some connections--both to other people and to understanding her own life. She has chronicled the regrets and advice of her dying patients, but has been unable to act on the collected wisdom. Ultimately, she is able to become "cautiously reckless". A pleasure to read and I look forward to further works from this author.

"The secret to a beautiful death is to live a beautiful life."

I live in a world where doulas are focused on maternal health, whether it be birthing or abortion care, so I was excited to hear about doulas in a new context--death--with The Collected Regrets of Clover. Clover is a death doula. Outside of her profession, Clover's life is small: she spends times with her pets, her elderly neighbor, and watching rom-coms. Clover doesn't have friends and hasn't dated or been kissed. The experiences Clover seeks are those that clients name as regrets upon their deathbeds. For example, if a client regrets not having learned a language, Clover might sign up for a course to learn it in their honor. She also documents their advice and works to integrate it into her life. One of my favorite examples is:

"'Whenever I moved to a new city or started a new relationship, I'd always change my perfume,' she'd told me. 'That way I'd be able to look back and relive my best memories from that time whenever I smelled it. So whenever you feel a shift or start a new chapter in life, find a new scent to go with it.'"

When she takes on a new client, Claudia, a storied photojournalist, Clover's world begins to expand. As you might anticipate, this is exciting and terrifying. Clover has built her lifestyle around preventing heartbreak. Opening up to friends and romantic experiences means vulnerability and potential pain. As a reader, we watch Clover move toward connection, curl back into her shell, and creep slowly back out as she learns to navigate new types of relationships. The story arc follows a fairly predictable arc, but that made it no less enjoyable to me. I loved watching Clover experience the world and grow... "Independence was worth a little discomfort, she reminded herself."

The Collected Regrets of Clover is sweet; I really enjoyed it. The female protagonists are strong and have kick-butt personalities. They live life with "cautious reckless[ness]," which is exactly how I want to live my own. Recommended!

Clover doesn't realize that in trying to hang on to her grandfather's memory, she gave up living her own life. Trying to make sure that no one was ever alone while dying in her job as a death doula, never allowing herself a chance to live, just held her in place for years. Lucky for her, she met some very special people that pulled her out of this pattern!

Thank you @netgalley and @stmartinspress for the ARC ecopy!

𝑻𝒊𝒕𝒍𝒆: The Collected Regrets of Clover
𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓: @mikkibrammer
𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: general fiction, women fiction
𝑹𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

𝑺𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔:
Clover Brooks is a 36-year-old lady who works as a death doula in New York City. Since the day she watched her kindergarten teacher dropped dead during a class, she realized she had a stronger connection with the dying than with the living.

During her trip to another continent, her grandpa passed away alone. Maybe that's why she has chosen to work as a death doula...

𝑴𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔:
I was intrigued by this book because it is about a "death midwife", a profession I had never heard of before!

I love how the story is plotted and how deep the story gets about Clover and her work. Even though it has loads of details, I was never bored with the details. Instead, I was hooked by the story and did not want to put the book down.

I also love how the book covers quite a lot of taboo topics surrounding death. Death isn't a straightforward topic to talk about in a lot of families and cultures, and yet the book covers those struggles so well.

This is a lovely and sweet book. I loved that the author--and her protagonist--pushed back against all of the tropes people use today to motivate themselves and to create their lives. Instead, this is a book about a woman who helps the dying spend their last days as they want, and how she untangles the complex feelings of personal grief she has, and becomes happier by challenging herself in ways she learns from her clients. This will be a great read for book clubs, but there's also something to be said for reading it as a solitary reader, and thinking about Clover's records and our own desires for the ends of our lives, and how we can learn to talk about those.

So sentimental, I enjoyed every second of it! I was hooked. I can relate to being socially awkward. I loved the ending. Thought it was a bit slow tho.

High-level review, mostly to stop myself from rambling and writing the equivalent of an in-depth research paper: I requested this book because… Death. I was very intrigued by following a death doula who has experienced death in a whole different light than most. This book was everything that I wanted it to be and so much more!

What I thought would be a sappy story of a woman finding her true meaning in life had amazing commentary on death, life, and creating meaningful friendships (and romantic relationships) beyond your twenties, which is something that is few and far between. There are hints of romance, but not to the point of being upsetting or risk taking over the entirety of the story. Brammer does an excellent job in her character creation and making Clover (and secondary characters!) dynamic, flawed, and very loveable.

From the opening chapter depicting Clover’s kindergarten teacher dying during class to the intricate truth we withhold from ourselves until we’re on our deathbed, I was eager to read more and more. While the topics are heavy at times, Brammer does a superb job of telling multiple stories (which we all have) through the course of one of Clover’s clients.

This story can definitely be read on a surface level as well as having many topics to discuss. Definitely recommend this one!

The writing was good yet I found Clover and the other characters somewhat hard to relate to.

Thanks Net galley and publisher for allowing me to read this atory.

All thoughts and opinions are my own and aren’t influenced by anyone else

An excellent novel, thoughtfully written with care and empathy for the character Clover. She is a death doula who gently guides her clients through their death.
There is such introspection for Clover as she listens to her client, Claudia, and it seems the time is right for Clover to also view her own life with a clear perspective.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.