"The secret to a beautiful death is to live a beautiful life."

I live in a world where doulas are focused on maternal health, whether it be birthing or abortion care, so I was excited to hear about doulas in a new context--death--with The Collected Regrets of Clover. Clover is a death doula. Outside of her profession, Clover's life is small: she spends times with her pets, her elderly neighbor, and watching rom-coms. Clover doesn't have friends and hasn't dated or been kissed. The experiences Clover seeks are those that clients name as regrets upon their deathbeds. For example, if a client regrets not having learned a language, Clover might sign up for a course to learn it in their honor. She also documents their advice and works to integrate it into her life. One of my favorite examples is:

"'Whenever I moved to a new city or started a new relationship, I'd always change my perfume,' she'd told me. 'That way I'd be able to look back and relive my best memories from that time whenever I smelled it. So whenever you feel a shift or start a new chapter in life, find a new scent to go with it.'"

When she takes on a new client, Claudia, a storied photojournalist, Clover's world begins to expand. As you might anticipate, this is exciting and terrifying. Clover has built her lifestyle around preventing heartbreak. Opening up to friends and romantic experiences means vulnerability and potential pain. As a reader, we watch Clover move toward connection, curl back into her shell, and creep slowly back out as she learns to navigate new types of relationships. The story arc follows a fairly predictable arc, but that made it no less enjoyable to me. I loved watching Clover experience the world and grow... "Independence was worth a little discomfort, she reminded herself."

The Collected Regrets of Clover is sweet; I really enjoyed it. The female protagonists are strong and have kick-butt personalities. They live life with "cautious reckless[ness]," which is exactly how I want to live my own. Recommended!

Clover doesn't realize that in trying to hang on to her grandfather's memory, she gave up living her own life. Trying to make sure that no one was ever alone while dying in her job as a death doula, never allowing herself a chance to live, just held her in place for years. Lucky for her, she met some very special people that pulled her out of this pattern!

Thank you @netgalley and @stmartinspress for the ARC ecopy!

𝑻𝒊𝒕𝒍𝒆: The Collected Regrets of Clover
𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓: @mikkibrammer
𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: general fiction, women fiction
𝑹𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

𝑺𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔:
Clover Brooks is a 36-year-old lady who works as a death doula in New York City. Since the day she watched her kindergarten teacher dropped dead during a class, she realized she had a stronger connection with the dying than with the living.

During her trip to another continent, her grandpa passed away alone. Maybe that's why she has chosen to work as a death doula...

𝑴𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔:
I was intrigued by this book because it is about a "death midwife", a profession I had never heard of before!

I love how the story is plotted and how deep the story gets about Clover and her work. Even though it has loads of details, I was never bored with the details. Instead, I was hooked by the story and did not want to put the book down.

I also love how the book covers quite a lot of taboo topics surrounding death. Death isn't a straightforward topic to talk about in a lot of families and cultures, and yet the book covers those struggles so well.

This is a lovely and sweet book. I loved that the author--and her protagonist--pushed back against all of the tropes people use today to motivate themselves and to create their lives. Instead, this is a book about a woman who helps the dying spend their last days as they want, and how she untangles the complex feelings of personal grief she has, and becomes happier by challenging herself in ways she learns from her clients. This will be a great read for book clubs, but there's also something to be said for reading it as a solitary reader, and thinking about Clover's records and our own desires for the ends of our lives, and how we can learn to talk about those.

So sentimental, I enjoyed every second of it! I was hooked. I can relate to being socially awkward. I loved the ending. Thought it was a bit slow tho.

High-level review, mostly to stop myself from rambling and writing the equivalent of an in-depth research paper: I requested this book because… Death. I was very intrigued by following a death doula who has experienced death in a whole different light than most. This book was everything that I wanted it to be and so much more!

What I thought would be a sappy story of a woman finding her true meaning in life had amazing commentary on death, life, and creating meaningful friendships (and romantic relationships) beyond your twenties, which is something that is few and far between. There are hints of romance, but not to the point of being upsetting or risk taking over the entirety of the story. Brammer does an excellent job in her character creation and making Clover (and secondary characters!) dynamic, flawed, and very loveable.

From the opening chapter depicting Clover’s kindergarten teacher dying during class to the intricate truth we withhold from ourselves until we’re on our deathbed, I was eager to read more and more. While the topics are heavy at times, Brammer does a superb job of telling multiple stories (which we all have) through the course of one of Clover’s clients.

This story can definitely be read on a surface level as well as having many topics to discuss. Definitely recommend this one!

The writing was good yet I found Clover and the other characters somewhat hard to relate to.

Thanks Net galley and publisher for allowing me to read this atory.

All thoughts and opinions are my own and aren’t influenced by anyone else

An excellent novel, thoughtfully written with care and empathy for the character Clover. She is a death doula who gently guides her clients through their death.
There is such introspection for Clover as she listens to her client, Claudia, and it seems the time is right for Clover to also view her own life with a clear perspective.
I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

“The Collected Regrets of Clover” by Mikki Brammer is a sweet and gentle story that gives us a thoughtful look at death…and life. Clover is a 36 year-old woman who is a death doula. While she provides comfort and solace to to those on their deathbed, she has never tried on her own life.

As we get to know Clover, we learn that she has lived a quiet life of routine. A small New York City apartment is her world, where she was raised by her grandfather after her parents died when she was 5. So she was always a quiet, private person. In a city as big and energetic as NYC, Clover lives a lonely life: she walks her dog, spies on her neighbors with binoculars, watches rom-come on tv and rereads her death notebooks. Life really never got started for Clover.

But then several new people enter her life and Clover shyly and awkwardly begins to see life in a different way. “Instead of asking why we’re here, maybe we should be savoring a simpler truth: We are here”. Will Clover take her first steps into a world of adventure and romance?

Although this seems to be a book about death, it is actually a book about discovering hope and how to lead a life that satisfies and nourishes. There is no definite grand moment or closure in this book. But we do sense a glimmer of hope for Clover.

This is a positive and pleasant debut novel. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an advance digital review copy. This is my honest review.

What a remarkable debut novel by Mikki Brammer! The Collected Regrets of Clover tells the story of Clover Brooks, a death doula, making her life in New York City. This well-written book explores the grieving process and the journey to move forward with the living. Although you would expect a morbid story, Brammer explores death with vigor!

Thank you, NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press, for the digital ARC in exchange for my honest review. All thoughts and opinions expressed above are my own.

I’ve never even thought about a death doula before in my life, yet Clover just made me love them so much. This is the most charming and endearing story about living and dying— A coming of age story with love, loss and loneliness, but it manages to be charming and sweet. Sure it rugs at your heart a few times, but I’d read this again and again. I absolutely loved this book!

Sigh, I’m sad that this story is over.

Grief doesn't leave any one untouched. Clover is a death doula who is dedicated to creating dignity and peace surrounding death. It is clear to see the love and respect she has for life. The author brought these feelings to the page.

I loved The Collected Regrets of Clover. It really makes you take a step back and think about the whole ordeal of death. Being a death doula, Clover is kind of an expert on death and the customs and traditions that come with it. I loved her relationships with both her grandfather and Leo, as well as the new relationships she begins with her new neighbor and Hugo. The characters were strong in this story, Clover being such a thoughtful and lovely character. I particularly enjoyed the regrets part of the story. Do you regret anything you did or maybe did not do in your life? I think we all do to some extent. She really cuts through that and helps people to try and fulfill a regret if she can. The plot was unique and engaging, my only complaint is I really did want the story to end. I look forward to reading more by this author.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was such a warm and comforting story about a death doula in New York City figuring out how to live. Although I felt the pacing was a bit slow at times, the book was overwhelm an enjoyable, quick read. I appreciated the honesty and grace that was used while exploring topics such as death and grief. I thoroughly enjoyed watching Clover open up to life and love and find her own confidence and strength. The Collected Regrets of Clover offered me a new perspective on death that I think many others would benefit from.

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for providing an e-ARC of this title.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is the debut novel from Mimi Brammer. Death is everywhere and Clover is no stranger. Death is her job.
A well written treasure trove of life and love and everything in between. Add this to your TBR!
05/09/2023

When I requested a copy of this book, I was intrigued by the subject - Death, in a fictional context. I’m so glad I read this wonderful and informative book.
Clover Brooks is 36, single, living in NY and she’s a death doula. As a birth doula welcomes a life into this world a death doula welcomes a life into the next. Clover has been brought up by an attentive grandfather but the words “I love you” aren’t spoken. The feelings are there but never voiced. And Clover finds that most of her “end of life” clients are often caught in the same place: loved but no one speaks about how they’ll pass.
When I began reading this book I have to admit I was a bit bored. Clover’s day to day life was mundane. Even though she was helping people pass over, her own life was lonely and uneventful. Then the pace picked up when Leo, Sebastian , a new neighbour and most of all, Claudia come into her life! Mikki Brammer does a fabulous job of bringing these characters to life and incorporating them into Clover’s.
Death isn’t an easy subject to discuss but I felt a peace come over me as Clover sat with her clients and helped ease their passage. Her job did prevent her from getting close to people in her personal life . Thank goodness there were good souls to give her sage advice.
I loved this book. Thank you to NetGalley and St Martins Press for my ARC. Highly recommend this touching read!

This was really, really good. I could see this being a book club pick! I think a lot of people are going to like this one.

"While I thought that I was learning to live, I have been learning how to die."

"It wasn't just the regrets of the dying people I was trying to resolve - it was my own."

This book had me drawn in from the beginning. Clover is a death doula. She helps a person to get closure and move on to peace when the time comes. She listens without judgement and truly cares.
A wonderful, engaging story about life, death, choices, and figuring out how to live without regrets.
I did shed some tears as I read.

Thank you NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for the opportunity to read this book.

It seems like this is the third book about a death doula that I've read withing the last year. It's an interesting career and one that grows more necessary our health care system declines from caring to billing. Anyway, Clover is a 36-year-old who holds a master's degree in Thanatology, the study of death. Having been orphaned by the death of her (very detached) parents at the age of five she has been raised by her grandfather in a small apartment in the West Village.

Gifted in her caring and support of the dying, she is herself cut off from feelings and emotions herself. Perhaps that is a factor of her job or her life experience. Other than watching TV romances and her neighbors window across the street, she has not personal knowledge of romantic love.

The book is well written and interesting enough, yet not gripping enough to keep you turning pages. I found Clover and the other characters somewhat hard to relate to. I also had a problem with believability of coincidence in how Clover finally finds her connection and possible love. I did enjoy, however, the journals she keeps on the last words and regrets of her clients. I'd rate The Collected Regrets of Clover as closer to a 3 1/2 Star rating simply because of the writing and would certainly read the next Mikki Brammer book when it comes out.

Many thanks to St. Martin's Press for a chance to read and review this book before publication.

I was so intrigued by the premise of this novel and loved the ways in which the intended outcomes within the story are mirrored in how it performs for the reader. Clover, the protagonist of the story, wants to see people become more comfortable thinking and talking about death, and because of the accessibility of the writing here and the potential commercial appeal, the novel should have that affect for readers who have shied away from death prior to reading. Clover is also in love with romantic comedies, living through the characters on screen (and sometimes through the neighbors she spies on and creates a storyline for). The style of the novel is very rom com also, so there is the meta experience of that as well. Overall, an easy and pleasant read that makes me want to keep learning more about death doulas!