Member Reviews

An easy to read book, choke full of helpful examples, which feels like a complete therapy course! There are suggestions in each chapter of how to deal with situations and emotions, and everything is explained in detail. A helpful book which I recommend, which gave me many other resources to look up for further reading.

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Thank you to the publisher for allowing me a copy of this book it was very informative and felt helpful in my own journey!

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The book Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Stephanie Kriesberg is an essential read for anyone who grew up with a narcissistic mother. The book provides the reader with an in-depth look at the cycle of abuse that is often perpetuated in these types of relationships, and offers concrete steps on how to break free from this cycle and start living life on your own terms.

The book is written in a clear, concise style that makes it easy to read, even for those who are not particularly familiar with psychology or psychiatry. It is structured around five main themes: recognizing the signs of narcissism in mothers, understanding the impact of narcissism on daughters, developing strategies for coping with and managing the effects of narcissistic parenting, rebuilding self-esteem, and creating a new life.

Each chapter starts with real-life stories from daughters who have struggled with their relationships with narcissistic mothers. These stories help to illustrate the various concepts that are being discussed, and they offer hope and inspiration to other daughters who are struggling. Kriesberg then provides practical advice on how to apply these concepts in your own life.

One of the most powerful aspects of this book is its focus on self-awareness. The author stresses the importance of understanding our own personal triggers and vulnerabilities in order to begin to change our toxic behaviours. She also emphasises the importance of enjoying life, and provides helpful tips on how to create a more positive lifestyle.

This book is a valuable resource for anyone who wants to break free from the cycle of abuse and start living a healthier, happier life.

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First I want to thank netgalley for sending me an advanced copy. This book was very insightful and I did learn some things about myself and how to cope with them. I am a daughter of a narcissistic mother and I am no contact.

I wish the book was a bit longer and included some ways to heal our inner child. That is one thing I am trying to work on at the moment, but overall this was a good book that can be helpful to those of us who have narcissistic mothers. I did find it a bit repetitive sometimes, but I enjoyed it and found some new ways of working on some things.

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I thought this book was excellent. I am a clinical social worker currently working in education. I read this for my own learning and reflection. This is a quick read at just around 100 pages. While I believe my mother has some narcissistic characteristics, I do not believe she is true narcissist. I connected to some of the case studies and descriptions and it made me reflect on my own experience, especially in setting boundaries and realistic expectations. I appreciated learning about the different types of narcissists (grandiose and vulnerable). I also appreciated the narrow focus of daughters of narcissistic mothers. It made the content more meaningful. Soon after I read this, I listed to Jenette McCurdy's memoir I'm Glad My Mom Died. It could have been an expanded case study for this book.

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I first want to say that I am so grateful for all of these books finally addressing "The Mother Wound." This is another of them and it has been very good and eye opening. This is a book I will want a physical copy of to mark up and re-read.

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This book has helped me reclaim my peace, sanity, and boundaries with my narcissistic mother.. This book is essential to those that have bad relationships with their mothers.

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I found this book to be extremely insightful. As a daughter with a narcissistic mother, this book provided tools and explanations that helped me start moving on. Many of us wish we had that strong mother daughter relationship and often times feel guilty that we don't. This book really helped clear the air for me.

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This book opened my eyes a lot. Very easy to read and makes you think. Thank you NetGalley for allowing me to read this book.

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I am loving work in this book. I shared some with my counselor this week and she’s very excited for me to using it. She will be getting it for herself as well. If that doesn’t say five stars I don’t know what does.
I just reviewed Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Stephanie M Kriesberg. #AdultDaughtersofNarcissisticMothers #NetGalley

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I always and to this day envy mothers and daughters who say each other is her best friend. I sure missed that growing up, but Mother always seemed to think we were when we were in front of her friends or out in public. It is a shame "Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers" was not published 50 years ago. My mother has been dead for over 20 years, but I am finally learning why she did some of the things she did, why I try and cover any hurt feelings someone may have caused me, and why I always strive to appear that everything is "fine." It was only during the last 10 years of her life when she received help for depression and on the road to recovery that a small difference in our relationship was noticeable.. Most of the damage had already been done, but now, I could be around her and not resent having to care for her. I just assumed the way she acted towards me while I was growing up and even into adulthood was due to her "social" drinking and depression. Rather interesting how her narcissistic attitudes were comingled with her alcoholism and depression. It was a really informative book and I hope younger daughters around 20 read this book in an effort to be able to understand what is going on with their mothers, and basically how to help each other.

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Extensive book about being a daughter of a narcissist. Needed this book years ago..

Thanks to author, publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book. While I got the book for free, this had no bearing on the rating I gave it.

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It is soul-destroying to be the adult daughter of a mother who is narcissistic. No one understands why you avoid Mother’s Day; why you cry the day away on your birthday; why you find it unfathomable when you hear someone mention that their mother is their best friend. And if you ever get the courage to tell someone that you hate your mother, that you have zero feelings towards them, that they are your biological mother only, forget about their understanding. They think you are selfish and can’t understand how you could say such things.

Adult daughters of narcissistic mothers have learnt to keep their mouths shut. They know they will be judged harshly, so instead, they suffer in silence. After all, society tells us from a young age that daughters and mothers should be best friends, shopping and having great times together. When your reality doesn’t match up to that, it can be very hard to accept. Harder still to believe that it is not your fault.

This book was hard to read, as it will be for anyone who is the adult daughter of a narcissist. We are trained from a young age to know, inherently, that every single thing that goes wrong is our fault. It takes courage to open this book, to take that step towards questioning the truth of your relationship with your mother.

This book is a good place to start, although I did feel that it often reinforced the misconception that managing a narcissistic mother was the responsibility of the daughter in this mother-daughter relationship. It is not.

This book is more suited to those with low-level narcissistic mothers, those passive-aggressive mothers. For those daughters whose mothers are more severe, this book is underwhelming.

While it talks briefly about grieving the relationship you didn’t get to have (the part I found most useful), I would have loved to have seen a discussion on how to navigate wishing that your mother was different, on longing to be loved the way you needed, the way you should have been. I wish there had been advice about having open and honest discussions with others about how your mother is, and about the reality of living with a narcissistic mother.

Overall it was a very narrow perspective of life with a narcissistic mother.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with a copy to read, it has in no way influenced my review.

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This book might be a wakeup call if you’ve ever dealt with a guardian or mentor figure (not just mothers!) who might display some narcissistic tendencies. This book will help shed light on the extent of the other person’s impact on you and contains exercises to help reconnect with yourself and feel more confident in facing such behavior from others.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.

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This is a compassionate book with a logical step-by-step guide to help adult daughters brought up by narcissistic mothers to first realise that the guilt, shame, and deep resentment that boil under the cover of being a perfect, caring, empathetic woman are not the reader’s fault. Then, just as one can tackle a big problem in life by dividing it into smaller parts, the hurt, the shame, the anger, the sadness that the reader feels can also be handled piece by piece. The reader is shown how to manage repetitive negative thoughts, and learn to feel and live without the guilt and shame and fear that has likely plagued the reader her entire life.

Reading through this book brought back painful memories, but I have learned several feasible methods here to un-brainwash myself from the critical voice in my head. I would recommend this to anyone who had felt belittled by overbearing mothers who constantly demanded and expected too much, whether one identifies her mother as being narcissistic or not.

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This book was painful for me to read. I'm still in the healing process after 4 years of therapy. This book hits so many spots. The reality and realization are once more very painful to deal with. Worth the read.

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There is a lot that's been written about narcissism and narcissistic parents lately. This books has some exercises to take back one's power as a child with a parent or parents who needed to be right, and needed attention. People who have never dealt with this subject before might find the suggestions and case studies helpful.

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Thank you to Netgalley and New Harbinger Publications for a digital galley in exchange for my honest review.

I think this book is a great stepping stone for a lot of women learning how to traverse a difficult mother-daughter relationship, but I don’t enjoy the hard reality of a mother never changing and the responsibility of communication being placed entirely on the daughter. This book kind of enforces the feeling so many of us with narc moms already feel— managing mother is our responsibility.

This may be a great resource for women with low-level narc moms, but in cases where the narcissism is a lot more severe and the effects of it devastating, this book is a slap in the face.

More often than not, I found the advice condescending. I’ll use the “practice” of tightly holding a pen as tightly as the way you’ve been holding on to your problems. Your hand is going to get sore, and you’re supposed to realize that holding on to things is going to hurt you in the long run. Obviously, we know that.

Or the practice of imagining stepping in quicksand and scrambling to get out makes it worse, they recommend floating and remaining calm. Essentially, stop wrestling with your mother because she’ll always win. The quicksand will always win. The entire book is told with the reality that mother will never change and it’s your duty to bear the emotional labour of that or let it go.

Where is the advice about wishing your mother could have been different and could have loved you the way you needed? Where is the advice about reparenting yourself and healing your inner child?

All we really talk about in this book are exercises that condescend to you and moms who send passive aggressive emails and voice mails.

The only helpful things I found were the journalling aspect, and even so much of that asks the same questions with minute differences, and also that it validates your experience and reminds you that you are not alone.

It very briefly talks about grieving the relationship you did not get to have, and that was the most impactful thing for me. What I would have liked to see was resources, support groups, and encouraging women to cut off their narc mom, and how to give their narc mom ultimatums about their behaviour, but I found it to be a very shallow scope of what it is like being a daughter of a narcissist. I also think it should have been better addressed how one would look for narcissist behaviours in themselves.

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This book really hit home for me, sometimes in painful ways. Stephanie M. Kriesberg has done her research and the tools she shares to help readers who identify as having narcissistic mothers move forward are detailed and helpful. Highly recommended for anyone who identifies with this subject. Thank to NetGalley for this ARC.

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The book should be titled Adult Daughters of Narcissistic Parents NOT Mothers, just because they are usually, most of the time, parenting does not mean that the Daughters can not be influenced by their Narcissistic Fathers.

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