The supernatural and grief fit so well together. The setting was stunning and informative, and watching each of the characters handle their grief differently made this story such a rich reading experience. I loved this.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for granting me free access to the advanced digital copy of this book, as this book has already been published, I will not share my review on Netgalley at this time.

This was such a unique book. Matiponesa, aka Mati, tells us the story of her family after her mother's death, and we follow them as they vacation through Zimbabwe, camping and going on safaris, their father showing them his home country.

But when stories are told in pieces, they can become different stories. A person who tells someone else's story may only see one side of it. Mati can see 'behind things' and is especially intuitive to seeing other's stories, but what about telling her own? Meticais, a gender-neutral fashionista and entity that only Mati sees, is there to listen and (sometimes not-so-gently) guide her through her story.

This was a very quiet story, with gentle insight into family and perception of the world. It is suggested that Mati is neurodivergent, and she knows that she is good at seeing 'behind things', the hidden motivations and the things that others don't notice. She is innocent but her insights are deep. Despite the topic of the book, I didn't find it sad but rather soothing and hopeful. The back-and-forth between Mati and Meticais is fun. And the piece-by-piece storytelling means we don't get the full picture until the very end.

A very beautiful book!

HOLY PLOT TWIST BATMAN!!! I'M NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING.

All That It Ever Meant is a short book. The chapters are quick, only a few pages long each, but the pace is very slow. Somehow, the frequent chapter breaks and the slow pacing really work well for this story. For almost the entire book, I felt like Mati was hesitant to tell us the full story. But eventually, as Mati continued to reveal piece after piece, I realized that it's not that's she's hesitant to tell the story, it's literally just how she is processing the grief her family is experiencing. It is stated multiple times throughout the book that Mati sees the world differently from other people; she thinks differently. (Maybe she's neurodivergent?) So, when you read this book, come into it knowing that you're going to have to be patient. And the wait is worth every Meticais.

Speaking of Meticais! They are nonbinary, fashionable, and enigmatic. They and Mati go back and forth a lot with "What?" and "You tell me!" But Meticais feels like they are there to help push Mati through processing the grief and telling the story without telling her how to go about it. And real talk, I am DYING to see an illustrated version of this book with all of Meticais' outfits included.

I think the final thing is really like to touch on is just how central family is to this story. It's really beautiful. Watching this family come back together after being shattered by grief is so real. Their father, a newly widowed Dad, is really trying to keep his family together while keeping himself from falling apart. His decision to take them to Zimbabwe, to reacquaint themselves with their roots, was a very solid decision.

This story has the kind of plot twist that will make you wake up your entire household as you scream at it. It will make you want to reread it just so you can see how you managed to somehow miss ALL the foreshadowing and hints. And then you'll sit back and finish reading Mati's story and think "Wow."