This Was a Very Interesting Read

A lot to take in and be self reflective about. There will be much you can take away. Some might be hard or something you feel doesn’t apply. There will always be things you feel don’t apply. The key is to keep reading and pray for discernment.

Audiobook: Read by the Author. Mike Donehey was very entertaining! I feel that it is very important in Non-Fiction/Sensitive content books to have it read in the way the message is intended. It allows the listener/reader to take the message in the manner it is meant.

I received a complimentary ARC of this book from NetGalley on behalf of the Publisher and was under no obligation to post a favorable review.

Mike has always been a beautiful thinker and writer. From his work with Tenth Avenue North, to his clear heart to communicate the gospel in every creative outlet, this is no different. You'll love Grace in the Gray.

I appreciate having received an ARC through NetGalley. I have been following Mike since his music and have always appreciated his wit, humor, and honesty. We could all use, especially in this day in age, the message he shares of finding grace and peace in admitting “I could be wrong”. Mike Donehey shares his wisdom with humility and humor. In a society and time with so much we disagree on, this book highlights the importance of reflecting on yourself rather than your opponent. I appreciate this message and recommend reading the book yourself.

This is Mike's second book and I was super excited to be approved for this. Mike did not disappoint in his second novel that is about finding grace and focusing on yourself rather than the argument that is set against you. He shares personal stories along with biblical insights to learn how to find more grace in your life. He discusses a four stage process to help you. Thank you to NetGalley and the Publisher for an ARC.

Mike presents a lot of good food for thought in a more loving way to disagree. I highlighted quite a bit in just about every chapter of my e-book copy. How to deal with criticism: “Don’t accept criticism from someone you wouldn’t seek advice from.” “If you keep resisting mercy for yourself, be assured you won’t have any left for anyone else.” “Our desire to be heard must not overpower our need to hear what others are saying. Our desire to be understood must not overshadow our need to understand others.
I received a free ARC of this book in exchange for my honest, unbiased review.

After reading Mine Donehey first book and being a long time fan of his music, I had high hopes for the book. It did not disappoint.

This was a perfectly timed subject in my life. I am going through some very painful lessons dealing with people and finding grace in the grey for them is very hard.

Thank you to the publisher and netgalley for allowing me to read and review this book. All opinions are my own.

Mr. Donehey has done a wonderful job exploring the topic of loving disagreement. In a highly polarized world, unity often feels like a pipe dream, but he says that it's worth fighting for nonetheless. Having read John 17 myself, I'd say he's in line with Jesus on that point.

Through personal anecdotes, humor, and clear teaching, Mike draws the reader close and challenges us to hold our opinions and stances more loosely in the name of a better way for loving others -- even those we disagree with. To be clear, he does not promote being wishy washy or not having beliefs or opinions, rather he points out that "[God is] more interested in cultivating great lovers than He is great debaters."

Clearly throughout the text, Mike shows what a people first mentality looks like and demonstrates cultivating the same in ourselves. This is a refreshing read in a world that seems to constantly be pointing fingers toward "the other side," whatever side that might be. Mike spends the entire book pointing us inward or pointing directly at himself and his journey to learning how to love people well in "the gray spaces." He says, "If God changes people through kindness, why do I think I can do so differently?" I've rarely felt more lovingly convicted and hopeful that there is a path forward toward unity.

Overall, Grace in the Gray was an easy read full of practical and loving, correction and direction toward being more like Jesus in our interactions with people in our lives that we disagree with. It truly made me look at areas of my life differently. I hope you'll give it a read. Oh and feel free to disagree with my review. I'll still love you.

I read Donehey's book Finding God's Life for My Will: His Presence Is the Plan a while back, so was excited to see this come up!

It's a really thought-provoking read, and some of the examples made me literally LOL. While I didn't agree with everything, it definitely made me stop and think about why--which I think was one of its main points. I frankly wish folks would read and learn from it just because the art of civil discourse seems to be a dying one; as Donehey notes, social media (for example) gives many people a platform they might not have otherwise ... which is great when used wisely, but how often does that actually happen? LOL! We all say things on social media we would never say in person (or at least in the same manner), and Donehey speaks from experience on how to do so well (or not). :D I appreciated his vulnerability and willingness to share the good and the bad he's experienced.

3.5 stars, rounded up to 4.

I received an eARC of the book from the publisher via NetGalley. All opinions are my own.

Mike is someone I trust deeply to speak truth and to do it with all kindness and gentleness. I appreciate the timeliness of this book as there is so much that divides us, while Jesus calls his followers to be people who love others unconditionally, just as he has loved us. Highly recommend for anyone willing to do the hard work of seeking unity, starting with asking hard questions of yourself and submitting to the way that Jesus called his followers to: seeing people with compassion and engaging with them in a graceful way.

In Grace in the Gray, Mike Donehey submits that instead of "agreeing to disagree", we take steps toward kindness, curiosity, listening, and choosing to love one another by speaking with grace, removing bitterness, and more. This book is approachable, thoughtful and practical. Here are a few quotes that stood out:

"There are plenty of authors of the Bible who could have been canceled for their indiscretions. The kingdom of God has never been a cancel culture. It is and always has been an invitation."

"Could it be that some of our differences are really preferences, traditions, or particular interpretations?"

"Avoidance never cures what ails us."

"God is not a problem to be solved but a mystery to encounter."

Donehey is a musician. He shares lessons he has learned from collaborating and critiquing. He gives plenty of personal examples to illustrate his teaching. His personal stories are many and long. I have to admit I skimmed through some of them to get to the point. He has a good sense of humor as the exploding blender story testifies. The book is more in the light hearted sense rather than rigorous teaching and may well appeal to younger readers rather than older ones used to more straight forward instruction.

Topics covered include forgiveness, unconditional love, parenting, who the real enemies are (spiritual), how we need to get along with those unlike us, prayer, social media (going from anger to curiosity to compassion), the gift of emotions and more.

I liked his example of the disciples. Matthew was a tax collector. Simon the Zealot was one who would have considered Matthew a traitor and would have wanted to kill him. Yet, following Jesus, they got along for a greater purpose. Another interesting teaching was Donehey saying that how we talk to God in prayer affects the way we talk to other people. I think his chapter on deconstruction was the best one, reminding us of kindness, wisdom, not being quarrelsome, and having deep knowledge.

Donehey does not touch on specific nor controversial issues hotly debated today. Like the farmer who said to leave the weeds until the harvest, we are encouraged to worry less and believe in God more. God is not freaking out and we shouldn't either. As Donehey says himself, this book “isn't about changing your mind about certain things. It's about reconsidering the posture we take when speaking with one another on those things.” (2807/3147)

This is a good book for those desiring to learn how to disagree better.

I received a complimentary egalley of this book from the publisher. My comments are an independent and honest review.

I enjoyed this book. Mike has a great way of introducing his topic and sharing his stories in a thought provoking, innovative way. He has a gift for sprinkling humor throughout the book to keep the reader engaged. In a world full of critics and division, I appreciated this read on productive ways to engage with others by leaning into curiousity and asking questions for understanding especially when we disagree.

Hello, thank you for the opportunity to review this book. Unfortunately I was not able to finish it becuase of a parent needing surgery and a hospital stay.

I will still support the book by purchasing on launch day and hopefully when life circumstances improve for me, I hope you’d give me another opportunity to out to review another book.

Thank you

This book is so timely. At a period in American history where everyone is out to dominate the other side, Mike's approach to disagreement is a breath of fresh air. He doesn't shy away from the truth but shares it with gentleness and a wisdom beyond his years. Instead of concluding to "agree to disagree", Mike demonstrates how we can cultivate discussion with those who stand on the opposite side and encourages us to exercise our empathy muscles. Instead of telling us to walk a mile in their shoes, he models ways to walk alongside them, not to agree, but to understand. With humor, wit, and humble honesty that are classically Mike, he hits the nail on the head again with his second book (and kindly steps on toes). This is a must read for all generations.

Overall, I give this a solid 3.5/5 rating. Donehey has a great purpose going in this novel: that we need to fix our eyes on God and the Bible as opposed to what our personal opinions are. (See also, the difference between personal opinions/convictions and biblical commands.) While I didn't agree with everything he said, that disagreement actually made me sit down and think about WHY I didn't, whether I had any biblical basis to do so, and I think that's the deeper purpose of this book when it comes down to it. Donehey quickly calls out the spirit-killing "tradition" and pride that often accompany these things. The book really started out on fire, and I was thrilled to have picked up a copy, I was taking notes left and right, I was being convicted...and then it kind of petered out. Maybe it was just me personally, but it felt like he was just touching the surface of some topics when I wished he would dig deeper. Other topics, I wish he had approached with the same energy as he did in the beginning. However, when you come down to it, it's a good book and it's very heartfelt in its core, and I do recommend it.
**I read a review copy in order to share my opinions. The opinions expressed above are my own**

Can’t tell you how much this book is hitting me between the eyes 👀 & more importantly— my heart. I may think I’m being graceful with my words, but in my heart I’m usually having it out, fighting a fight that I want to win. That’s still not grace 😬. This book has such a reminder to me to listen with my ears and also my heart, not by telling and shouting, but with gentle stories of Mike's own life.
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You can pre-order this book now where all the books are sold and get your copy if you are like me and need your love to be put in check with God’s heart, even if it’s in your mind.
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*Book received as an ARC in exchange for my review*

This book opened my eyes to how much my posture needed to change towards other image bearers whose beliefs on the non-essentials don't align with mine. I'm grateful for the author's heart in sharing what he's learned with his platform.

What a great framework for thinking of these types of conversations! There aren't "experts" on having hard conversations, per say, but I appreciated that Mike approaches this topic as one of us. Someone who is feeling this tension, not an expert. Great work, Mike!

This book was different than I thought it was going to be. One thing for sure, it definitely makes you think! I don't agree with everything the author says, but do agree with a lot of what he says, including the main premise of the book, which is that there should be a more loving way to disagree. He gives a lot of good advice and tips on how to do this. A good book for many Christians to read, as most of us could do some growing in this area, myself included!!
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advance e-copy of this book. The opinions expressed are entirely my own.

DNF. I made it through almost 30% and just couldn't make myself pick it up again. The summary sounded like it was going to teach, but it reads more like a slightly disjointed memoir with some takeaways. Maybe it improves after this and I just didn't hang in long enough, but the book simply wasn't working for me. A couple things felt not quite right, but I was hoping to overlook them for a bigger picture. But it just wasn't coming. If I find myself able to pick it up again and it improves, I'll edit my review accordingly. But for now, in the words of my best friend, life is too short to read bad books. I have other NetGalley books to check out instead.