Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.

Pepper, an anthropologist in her 30's, was left on the doorstep of a veterinarian's porch. She is adopted by the lesbian couple and has a great relationship with her two mom's and a solid marriage to the level-headed Ike. Her biological mom is the mysterious painter, Ola Frost. Frost is rumored to paint portraits that unite subjects' with versions of them from alternate realites. Loved the concept, this was right up my alley! If you like odd books about the multiverse you may enjoy this a lot,

While this one did start quite slow, it picked up and got more intense in the last half. I was intruiged the whole time but I did wish there was something more at the end. I can't really pinpoint what that may be but it did feel like it could have just went a step further on some of the core ideas. This gave me Orphan Black vibes and I adored that show. I loved the chase after information once Pepper was abroad. All in all, this could have been a little better executed resoultion wise, but other than that, I really enjoyed! The cover is beautiful, also!

I really enjoyed the concept of this one but I would have loved going so much more into the mechanics. Loved the audio.

Pub day: 10-18-2022

The only way to explain how I felt about this book is to say that it was strange but compelling. At the center of this story is the idea of alternate universes existing where our other own selves are living very similar or very different lives. Is it possible to ever meet one of them?

We follow the main character, Pepper, as she embarks on a quest to find answers about her birth mother, a famous artist who has gone missing but who Pepper never met. The beginning of the book was a lot of reflection on Pepper’s relationship with her adoptive mother and her husband, along with a lot of “what-ifs.” I felt frustrated with how much Pepper kept thinking about what an alternate version of herself might be doing or how they might be living a different or better life. But the mystery of finding answers about her birth mom was really good and the journey and discoveries just got more riveting as the story went on.

It took me a few days to get through the first half and then I flew through the last half, it was so gripping!

I did a combo of print and audio. There are a lot of texts between Pepper and her husband which are a little trickier via audio, but it was done well and didn’t bother me at all. The last half will definitely appeal to those who’ve enjoyed books by Blake Crouch!

Thank you Netgalley, Macmillan Audio, & Macmillan-Tor/Forge for the arc & alc in exchange for an honest review!

Self-Portrait with Nothing by Aimee Pokwatka immediately drew me in with its intriguing plot about a notoriously reclusive artist who paints people's parallel lives. The artist, Ula Frost, now in her fifties, has recently gone missing. The story line follows those who know her and we learn more about the mystery that surrounds her. I loved the writing style. The prose is beautiful and literary. The style and story reminded me a little bit of Marisha Pessl who penned the fantastic Night Film some years ago. I listened to the audiobook, which is perfectly narrated by Jesse Vilinsky.

Thank you to the publishers and NetGalley for providing this ebook + audiobook ARC. All thoughts are my own.

I loved the narrator! Found them to be engaging throughout the book.

I really liked how art was used as a medium to bring to life or draw from alternative universes. Very unique!

The book's big reveal wasn't as great as I would have liked... it just happened, and that was it...

Other than that, enjoy the Self-Portrait with Nothing and I can't wait to recommend it :)

Pepper has always known she was adopted and had suspicions of just who exactly her biological mother is, but it was an area she didn’t want to explore.

However when her biological mother, Ula - a reclusive painter with mysterious abilities, goes missing she has to open that door.

It takes her on a wild ride through alternate universities, what ifs and those wanting the power her mother has.

This was a great blend of sci-fi, realism, art and intrigue. I never knew exactly what was coming next but couldn’t wait to find out.

A Self-Portrait with Nothing is an atmospheric read with so many different layers. The story seemed to blur the lines between genres and could appeal to a wide range of readers. The story follows Pepper, an anthropologist and an expert of bones, who also just so happens to be the abandoned biological daughter of Ula Frost, a mysterious famous artist who specializes in parallel universes.

While reading I found myself amazed by the characters. Each one felt so well described, different and well planned. Pokwatka masterfully crafts a new reality for readers to explore. The story seemed to blur the lines between genres, but I think it would greatly appeal to those who enjoy speculative fiction, literary science fiction and even those who enjoy fictional stories about the art world.

As Pepper began to question and describe the realities of the other versions of herself across parallel universes, I began to feel as if the layers of my own were unfolding for me to glimpse them as well. It is a story that speaks for itself, while also pulling the reader into it's reality to question their own lives. The possibilities are endless and thinking in terms of parallel universes in such depth just makes my brain spin (but in the best ways)!

This was of my favorite books read this year. I LOVED the concept. I thought it was so interesting. It felt very Blake Crouch-adjacent, if that makes sense. I also loved the settings, I am polish so it was nice that there was a polish vibe, it's definitely rare in Sci-fi. I am conflicted about Pepper (the main character), there were times that I was extremely frustrated by her but I also could not help but root for her to succeed.
I would buy this audiobook for a friend and I would recommend it to others.

What a uniquely bizarre tale told from the perspective of a woman who comes to learn that her long-lost biological mother has the ability to paint different universes into existence, by using her clones as the portal to those alternate instances. A huge thank you to Tor, NetGalley, Macmillan Audio, and Aimee Pokwatka for granting me Advanced Listener Access to Self-Portrait with Nothing prior to its publication date of October 18, 2022.

Renowned artist and scientific innovator, Ula Frost has gone missing and it's all anyone can talk about, including the students in Pepper Rafferty's class. Pepper begins to panic internally because she's the only one who knows about her secret lineage with the esteemed and now missing artist. Ula's fanbase raves for her claimed ability to paint and create multiversal doppelgangers into existence, and it's only a matter of time until syndicates and faux government agencies come knocking on Pepper's door because they've cracked the code and are coming for the next heir to the artistic throne.

Pepper takes on the help of a local journalist and jets off to Poland to find her mother, flee the throes of these dangerous organizations, and put a stop to the mind-boggling, universe-bending creation of clones and doppelgangers alike.

I really enjoyed listening to this one, but I really do feel like I need to get my paws on a physical copy so I can follow the twisted mysticism more closely.

Book Title: Self-Portrait with Nothing
Author: Aimee Pokwatka
Audiobook Narrator: Jesse Vitasky
Publisher: Macmillan Audio
Genre: Si-Fi/Fantasy
Pub Date: October 18, 2022
My Rating: 3 Stars

Dr. Pepper Rafferty is a thirty-six-year-old academic and forensic anthropologist (hmmm wondering if story is going to be similar to Dr. Temperance Brennan who is a medical forensic anthropologist)
Pepper is adopted and her two mothers are both vets. Her biological mother is an artist. She has been married for seven years and is happy to be living the good life.

Pepper has long been intrigued by the idea of alternate universes — wondering how different her life might be in the other universe. Pepper is adopted and her two mothers are both vets. Her biological mother is an artist. She has been married for seven years and is happy to be living the good life; but
is curious about another life. Her intrigue has her curious about Ula Frost. It is rumored, that whenever Ms. Frost paints a person’s portrait, the subject’s doppelgänger is summoned from a parallel universe, with generally unhappy results.
Now Ula Frost is reported missing.

I was actually drawn to this story as Aimee Pokwatke is from Wheeling WV - the same area where I was born and raised.
The other reason I was drawn to this as I read and liked;
"The Two Lila Bennetts" by Liz Fenton and Lisa Steinke, "Maybe in Another Life" by Taylor Jenkins Reid and "Wish you Were Here" by Jodi Picoult ~ all were sliding door, parallel universe/ Groundhog Day type stories and I enjoy all three.

Want to thank NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for the opportunity to listen to this early eGalley.
Publishing Release Date scheduled for October 18, 2022

A very enjoyable read! A unique and well-done take on alternate universes, which made this fan of Everything Everywhere All at Once very happy, with a main character that by the end I couldn't help but love. There may be "better" versions of Pepper out there somewhere, but I'm glad we were following this one (I wish we'd gotten more of her moms, who seemed amazing). There were moments when the "In a parallel universe..." speculation got out of hand/repetitive, but that's kind of the nature of the beast with this kind of story.