- DNF
-Lewd
- Abundance of Potty Humor

This is an unfair review.

Thank you to NetGalley and Vintage Anchor for an ARC

I love Comedy and can often be found dragging my husband to the comedy club for date night in our nearby city. That being said I found a good 2/3 of this book (that I read) was extremely random and/or filler fluf. When writing about actual events (leaving Chicago during the start of the pandemic, family life, etc.) things were spot-on hilarious relatable, and engaging. However, this just got lost in the muck of detailed potty talk and potty humor. I tried pushing through speed reading some essays, including the “Dave Matthews Chapter (HUH?) I am fully aware that comedy is subjective and this was just not a hit for me. Therefore I will not be posting this review on any other platform.

Thank you, NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review Quietly Hostile by Samantha Irby.
Samantha Irby is that author that can take something as random as a Dave Matthews lyric and write an entire chapter on it. Seriously. If you're into Dave Matthews, you might be into that. But sadly, I am not. She also wrote an entire novel inside a novel of Sex and the City episodes and the ways in which she would have edited/added to them. If you're into Sex and the City, you might be into that? But wait, I love SATC! However, the thesis in her book about the show was also not for me. Whomp whomp.
Now don't get me wrong. I love long, arduous analysis (analysises? analysis'? analysi?) on random shit. That is what my anxious brain lives for! But I don't need to read about your random shit analysis, nor would I want you to read a novella about mine.
Also, this book has waaay too much potty talk, (i.e. urinating in someone's mouth? Wtf. People do that?) and I found myself cringing and skimming many parts that were even too far for my sometimes 15-year-old teenage boy-esque humor.
I will admit, there were plenty of parts that made me LOL. But what far-outweighed the laughs was the cringe.
This one just wasn't for me.

I loved Irby's previous book "Wow, No Thank You" so when this essay collection showed up on NetGalley I was so excited and immediately put in my request. Quietly Hostile does not disappoint. I was laughing out loud at some points and incredibly sad at others.

Irby touches on a wide range of topics from the Sex and the City reboot (which she worked on) to her relationship with her wife to her opinions on public restrooms. Irby also touches on more poignant topics like her relationship with her late parents and her chronic illness.

While I enjoyed this book I would not recommend it to people unfamiliar with Irby's earlier work. However, if you are a fan of Irby's essays I would highly recommend this latest entry.

I was provided a free copy of this book from NetGalley

The newest essay collection from Samantha Irby was hit or miss for me. While I enjoyed many of the essays, a few were way too long to read in one sitting, or just felt too long due to the niche subject matter that required prior knowledge of.

I've read a couple of Irby's previous works, and I will say if you liked those, you probably will like this one, as it's mostly in the same vein. This one was not quite as relatable to me personally, and some of the content was a little too ick for me.

Definitely recommend if you're already a Samantha Irby fan!

Samantha Irby's collection of essays titled "Quietly Hostile" perfectly summed up how I perceive myself in social situations. Filled with relatable humor and deeply personal anecdotes, Irby essays captivate the reader's attention with hilarious, grotesque, and witty details that perfectly capture her. main points in each argument. What I appreciate most is how each essay dives head first into the primary focus, but will also twist and turn quickly, keeping the reader consistently invested. This is another fabulous collection from Samantha Irby, and I am thankful to Netgalley and Penguin Random House for this advanced copy.

I need to first say that I owe Samantha Irby because Wow, No Thank You was what brought me out of my pandemic reading slump. And then she did a zoom author’s chat and I remembered why I loved being a book nerd and going out to author’s events.

I personally believe Irby is at her best (and her best is so good) when she’s writing about herself, she is raunchy and laugh at loud funny. When she does that is Quietly Hostile she is amazing. The chapter on packing up her Chicago apartment and moving back home at the start of COVID was hyperbolically relatable and hysterical. For me there are two chapters in this book that just fell flat – one many people have noted as well – the Sex and the City chapter; I actually ended up skimming it because it got boring, and Irby is usually anything but boring. I also didn’t love the chapter about her pilot. So I guess I just enjoy when she is her classic self, being amusingly self-deprecating for our pleasure (and I think hers).

This is still a four star rating because even with those two chapters, any book that makes me laugh like Quietly Hostile did, deserves it (but it was probably 3.75).

Thank you Netgalley and the publishers for sending and allowing me to read this title. This was one of the books I couldn't wait to read this year. I was going to buy it but then I received this arc. The cover is so cute. This was a really good collection of essays.

Oh how I love thee Samantha Irby! Always one to make me laugh and to be like guuuurlll...are you in my head!? This book is SO good! The chapters on what to say to teens and what you should in your guest bathroom had me nodding and laughing and then wishing that my MIL had read the chapter about the bathroom. haha The only thing that would make this better was if I had the audio version so I could listen to Sam tell me about it in her voice.

Thank you to Netgalley for the ARC, it is MUCH appreciated.

Reading Samantha Irby’s writing is like that deep laugh that results in a stomach ache to be confused with actual exercise. I love her and always look forward to her books (which i ALWAYS recommend) because i know i will laugh, probably say aw, cringe and maybe identify with something gross or TMI-worthy, and ultimately know that I didn’t waste my time. This is exactly what I want every essay collection to be. Quietly Hostile made me laugh a lot while identifying with the less than ideal parts of life. I love.

I will not finish this book. The pages that I did manage to read are filled with too much hostility and rage for my liking. I did not find any humor in any of it.

I've grown to really admire Samantha Irby's writing style over the last few years. Hilarious, relatable, and unputdownable, this book is perfectly, quietly hostile.

I always find Samantha Irby's work to be intelligent, insightful and often laugh-out-loud funny. This is not my favourite book by Irby but it is still a book that I happily recommend.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC.

Its always good to have new Samantha Irby, a modern-day comedian and scholar who is never afraid to tell it like it is. In this group of stories, she talks about growing older, being in love, writing for television and of course - farts. She is insightful and a page-turner, filled with wit and brevity while also not shying away from difficult topics.

Samantha Irby is hilarious. I enjoy her wit and sense of humor. Also, I think her book covers are 10/10 stars. I think I liked some of Irby's earlier essays better than this book. Several in this collection were too long. While, talking about poop can be hilarious, it felt like there were too many essays centered on it.

My favorites were probably "I like it", and the Dave Matthews & Sex and the City Retrospectives.

Rounding up from 2.5 stars.

Thank you Netgalley & Vintage Press for the advanced reader copy.

while I still legitimately laughed out loud a few times, this Samantha Irby book just didn't land for me as much as her others have. maybe it's simply because I consume neither dave matthews music nor sex and the city episodes and so two big essays were lost on me? idk but it felt like a much more uneven collection than her previous ones.

I’ve been pretty vocal about books that came to fruition during the lockdown portion of the pandemic. Even one of my favorites (Lisa Jewell) stumbled a bit with the very unnecessary The Family Remains (good news is, she has another release coming up this Summer and that one is a banger). When I saw Samantha Irby was getting ready to release her own pandemic offering, I was so there for it. I mean she’s hilarious to begin with so her take on quarantine life was sure to be a winner. Right?

Unfortunately, wrong. I mean there were times when I was like oh yes bish, you are me . . . .

“Quietly hostile is how I would describe my public personality. I am mild-mannered and super polite, but just beneath the surface of my skin, my blood is electrified and I am one inconsiderate driver away from a full Falling Down-style emotional collapse.”

And there were the standard LOLz from stories of a weak bladder (and anal sphincter), a near-death experience via allergic reaction and how delicious a “dip dinner” can be. Buuuuuuuuuut then there was a deep dive into which Dave Matthews songs are her faves and over 20% of the word count spent analyzing porn and breaking down Sex and the City eps . . . .

As someone who still calls it Sex IN the City – I was obviously not the target demographic for any of that. I was not aware the Irby wrote “The Pool Episode” of Shrill (but I have actually watched it and thought it was the only good one in the first season so kudos to you, Irby). Nor did I know (or really care) that she was a part of the Sex and the City reboot.

I wanted an analysis of the mundane daily motions she went through to make it past Covid – not this.

I've read many of these self-deprecating essay collections this past year and I'm always disappointed. I'm not sure what pearls of wisdom I expect to find or lessons gleaned from each writer I expect to come away with, but I finished Quietly Hostile empty handed. The first two essays were strong and mildly entertaining, but by halfway through the collection I had read enough about masturbation, diarrhea and golden showers to make me feel like a censorious prude.

This won't be the first title of Irby's that I recommend to people, but it was still worth the read.

Damn, I hate to be Debbie Downer but this book was a huge disappointment. I loved Irby’s We Are Never Meeting in Real Life, which got extra points because she dedicated it to Klonopin. It was self-effacing, off-kilter, hysterical, and brilliant. She is the queen of anxiety, and since I am also an anxious Annie, she cracked me up with her stories on the subject. She also talked about getting old (though to her, 40 is old, lol—oh, just wait!), which also was sigh-worthy relatable. Next, I read her Wow, No Thank You, and I wasn’t as wowed, though I still gave it 4 stars. I was super excited to see that she had a new book of essays coming out.

Disaster! The opening was funny and wise, and I thought I’d be settling in for a treat. Wrong! Suddenly she’s listing Dave Matthews songs and talking about them one by one. I like Matthews okay, but not enough to know his songs—man, was this essay tedious! I don’t get why she would assume people not into Matthews would think this was fun reading.

Okay, as if this wasn’t bad enough, she devotes an insanely long chapter to Sex and the City—all nitty-gritty talk about specific scenes in this long-running series. (Which, no, I never watched. Well, I think I saw maybe one episode?) Talk about esoteric! Seriously, even if I had seen the series, would I remember these scenes? She would provide alternative plotlines, which sometimes caught my attention but mostly annoyed me because they were basically empty without my knowing how a scene actually went down.

Okay, so Dave Matthews, Sex and the City—I can write off these chapters that were boring and insignificant to me. But what I couldn’t get past was all the raunch—and I mean raunch on steroids! Most of the rest of the book was about diarrhea (her favorite subject), but she also talked about pee, puke, and masturbation (including what kind of porn she likes, and recommending a specific dildo)! I kid you not. I don’t consider myself a prude, but damn, I really don’t want to read about her orifices and what she does with them, I really don’t. She is obsessed with her bowels, especially. She has IBS and that can’t be any fun, but why gather up the whole world and talk, in detail, about her excretions? I know she’s going for over-the-top humor (and probably assumes some of her jokes about experiences in public bathrooms are relatable), but I was grossed out, not entertained. I have the same problem with stand-up comics who talk incessantly about poop or sex; it’s change-the-channel time if they go there.

The last third of the book is good. It’s the old Irby, with lots of hilarious, self-effacing, non-poopy tales. She has a great story about an allergic reaction that had me laughing hard.

Irby has had a tough life and has so many medical problems. I feel for her and up to this point have appreciated her openness, her honesty, her vulnerability. She has a great off-kilter view of the world and is a terrific storyteller. This time, she went too far. I wish she would just stick to funny stories that don’t involve poop, puke, or masturbation.

She has made it big, much to her surprise—she writes for television now, has a super popular blog, and tons of fans. I’m truly glad she is getting the attention she deserves. She’s one smart cookie. I’m guessing her fans will like this book because her voice is so original and funny, and they’ll probably just appreciate how outrageous she is. But nope, just not for me. I’m afraid she’s off my list now.

And this is funny to me—I went from loving the book cover to not liking it at all! I used to think it was hilarious; now all I see is a super pissed-off skunk with sharp, ugly teeth! Not entertaining at all.

I went nuts trying to decide how many stars to dole out. I decided that even though I had such a strong, negative reaction to most of the book, I’ll clutch the last third, which showcased the Irby that I’ve adored in the past, and I’ll round up to 3 stars.

Thanks to NetGalley for the advance copy.

Quietly Hostile is another great collection from Sam Irby. From cooking to cable tv, Sam keeps her trademark humor on fire. I'd call it self-deprecating but she is unapologetic about having chronic illness, being queer, being black, being sexual, being fat. I love the way she is so self-accepting.