Damned If You Do was the type of book that sits with you long after the final page. This was a bold, brave, and brilliant book.

I went into this knowing very little about this book beyond the premise of a queer Buffy the Vampire Slayer meeting Filipino folklore in this horror comedy about a high school stage manager who accidentally sells her soul to a demon. That intersection of folklore and theatrical drama made me want to pick it up and the author, Alex Brown, took me completely by surprise. I was blown away by the strength of this book.

From the very first page, you have an uneasy sense sitting under your skin—that small hum of electricity when the tension begins to build. I liked how Brown manipulated the elements of a typical Faustian tale and imbues it with pathos and nuance. This is no ordinary deal with a devil, this is complicated, layered, and emotionally fraught. Brown ensures that there are tangible stakes here with bloodshed and bodies coming through, as well as the psychological horror wrecked by the manipulation of trauma. You can see the oncoming storm of destruction heading their way and you get totally swept up in its path. The pacing and tension was sublime here, causing you to devour the book and loving every second of it.

A real core focus of this book is a nuanced depiction of the aftereffects of abuse and trauma, which was excellent. Brown pours heart and soul into this, examining the minute ripple effects and the continuing ramifications of the trauma Cordelia faced. These make for some of the most horrifying sequences, which are real gut-punches. Choosing to focus your fantastical, demonic tale in a grounded, fraught and vulnerable story of trauma pays off so well. It gives you that emotional thread to hand on to and I found myself deeply invested in Cordelia and her story. The burden that she carries is immense and working through it to recognise how she should not have to carry it, with emotions redirected in unhealthy places for her, is a story that is so important to tell.

There is a definite focus on the cost of survival and the excruciating choices victims of abuse are often forced to make. That instability and elements of misplaced guilt around her survival are key parts of Cordelia’s character arc. This was easily one of the best parts of the book for me. Cordelia grows as a character so much over the book and her journey really resonated with me. Her quiet strength and drive to survive comes to the forefront, as she grapples with her trauma and learning to find a place where she can live with it. She knows it will not be banished easily, instead there is an acceptance that does not wholly define her.

Also, I loved how Brown wove in elements of Filipino folklore. This is something I knew very little about, but the book made me race off and learn so much more. This is an incredibly rich tapestry of tales that Brown draws on in creative and unexpected ways. The way it informs her narrative voice and character building is wonderful to watch unfold. My inner theatre nerd was also rejoicing with the amount of theatre content in here and Cordelia’s deep love for the artform. This was another outlet for emotional release and catharsis, an oasis of quiet peace (by comparison) in a turbulent world. In addition to this, I also loved the soft, sweet sapphic romance intertwined into the story. This provides such a comforting and heart-warming escape, growing naturally and with instant chemistry that I was invested in.

Damned If You Do is a book that balances heart-wrenching scenes with ones full of love, light, and joy. It embodies that ray of sunshine in the midst of a dark storm.

The main thing which made me want to read Damned If You Do was the promise of "Queer Buffy the Vampire Slayer meets Filipino folklore". Most of what I know about the vampire slayer is very surface level so I can't really comment on that. The Filipino folklore however, was something I was very excited to see.

Imagine finding out the town you live in has been built on top of peoples' deals with a demon. Now imagine learning that it's been going on for the past century. Top that with finding all of this after learning your dad didn't really leave, but is currently rotting in hell.

I enjoyed reading it. I tried to see if the synopsis was playing with me: telling me Fred is a "good" demon who wanted to save the town from the bad demon who is currenty freely living amongst them.

Also, this book has sapphic representation and I'm all here for it!

The moment I noticed that this novel is queer Buffy the Vampire Slayer meets Filipino folklore, I had to read it! And, I really enjoyed the overall concept of Damned If You Do. I definitely got Buffy vibes. I am sad there are no vampires in the small town of Ruin’s End. Nope, this book talks of demons, hell, and serves as a good reminder why you should be careful who you make deals🤝 with.

The DL: When Cordelia Scott was young, she made a deal with a demon to send her abusive father away. But, what was the deal? Cordelia doesn’t remember. She literally blocked this traumatic event out of her mind. As the town approaches its 100 year anniversary, the demon’s back to collect on his part of the bargain.
Cordelia is sassy and makes snarky, quick witted comments. Some of my favorite quotes:

1. “I wanted to tell her everything and nothing at the same time. She was with me when we did the summoning ritual, after all.”

2. “Taking his hand was the only way to fix my problems. So, I did. ‘You’ve got a deal.’”

3. “Hell isn’t something that you can simply walk into…It’s not like the Super Bowl.”

4. “Fred painted his rival as this dangerous entity that wanted to spread Demon Capitalism all over the world.”

5. “If heroes existed, they weren’t in Ruin’s End. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have made a deal with a demon in the first place.”

6. “I wasn’t sold on the idea that one could de-stress from a musical by singing karaoke, but traditions were traditions.”

Thank you Tbrbeyondtours and PageStreetYA for the complimentary copy of Damned If You Do by Alex Brown.

4.5 Stars

I requested to read this book because it was compared to Buffy, but it was interesting on its own. The idea of "Deal Day", and making deals with demons to get what you want only to lose a part of yourself and the deals have loopholes that never turn out out the way you want them. The main character is strong, but scared and the fact that she ultimately gains a new perspective on the choices she made is hopeful and badass at the same time. I love this rag-tag team of teenagers who are also drama geeks that can possibly save the day without anyone being the wiser. Definitely a fun read!

OH, MY GOODNESS THE NOSTALGIA.

I’m very much one of the generation that grew up with Buffy, and Damned if You do absolutely hits the nail on the head with the comparison to that show. But this is no mere homage or love letter to that show, although the nostalgia and little callbacks are all there on the page, instead it has taken the best of that and made it into its own, uniquely different story.

Comedy. Horror. Paranormal. Folklore. Friendship. Family.

Damned If You Do has it all, and what really struck me about the book and what will stay with me long after the reading is the heart to it. It would have been easy to focus on the pining (and oh boy I loved that storyline), and the teenage angst and conflict, and the demons and folklore elements; but instead, Brown has woven a story with depth and moving currents. Beneath all that, this is a story of confronting your demons head-on regardless of what shape they might take, and learning that not all demons are necessarily bad – and that some things are better and worse than that annoying guy in highschool.

Firstly, though I have to talk about the worldbuilding. I was already onboard with a story about making deals with a demon (accidentally or not), but I loved the way Brown built that into the history of the town, as well as the stories of the characters and the current events themselves. It’s an interesting idea that the current predicament of the town has been caused by humans seeking bargains, whether by accident or choice, superstition giving way to reality. I also liked the variety in the demons, and the limitations – yes the power balance was utterly in their favour, and the threat utterly believable – and personal – but it was never without hope.

Then there was the Filipino Folklore that was woven throughout. This is not a folklore that I am overly familiar with, outside of those books that I have been lucky enough to read so far, but I thoroughly enjoyed it here and how it played into the characters’ stories, and it certainly has me wanting to read more.

“You were wrong, you know. I’ll never be like you,” I said, smiling. “It was never just me. Even when you think you’ve gotten rid of my friends, they’ll still be there for me. More than I can say about you.”

However, it was without a doubt the characters that stole the show for me. Cordelia was a brilliant protagonist, flawed and full of all the struggles of a normal teenager, while also dealing with a far more harrowing childhood – which was handled incredibly well, even with the supernatural elements adding an additional horrifying level to the events. It was great seeing that as a through thread to the present, shaping her behaviour and her relationships with those around them, and made an interesting parallel for dealing with personal demons alongside actual demons. But, though all that she has a strength and determination to protect her friends, to try and move forwards even when it doesn’t feel possible.

And of course there is her friendship and pining for her best friend. Oh that teenage crush and more, it was done so well, and I loved that we got to see it developing and being shaped by mistakes, and communication from both sides. It was a very natural development, and sweetly done. And it was such an important element to the story.

Dustin added a great counterpoint to the girls, a reminder that there was real life going on at the same time against the supernatural backdrop, and a great way of pulling in that small town, high school drama. He was a character that I went from wanting to smack at the start (one of the first interactions was beautifully done on so many levels, both to establish him, but also showing the struggles Cordelia had and her friendship with Veronica), to really liking. He was also the one that it felt had most in common with us, the normal guy suddenly finding out that actually there’s a lot of things moving in the shadows and just out of sight, and he went through a lot and Brown lets us see how that shaped him and the relationship he has with the others.

Fred. Fred I just loved. Having a lynchpin between the different elements, who was quirky and the source of a lot of the humour, and a lot of the emotional growth and development. An adult sounding board, and voice with the knowledge and experience the younger group need, without having all the answers.

The only character I felt like I never really got a proper grip on was Cordelia’s mother. The relationship and trauma they shared was conveyed very well, but primarily through Cordelia’s point of view. It meant that when we get the, not quite reconciliation, but bridging moment between the two it didn’t have the impact it might have, although it was still a touching scene.

Damned If You Do does a fantastic job of brining together all it’s various elements, and even though its paranormal and demons, it has the grounding moments to give that realism that adds an extra layer of menace to the dangers and horror. There aren’t any easy answers, the characters have to fight to find the answers they need, struggle finding the right path, they make mistakes and lose, and it makes the journey all the more compelling for it.

Damned If You Do was an entertaining read from start to finish, and well-balanced between the horror and comedy (which is coming from someone who struggles with comedy!!). The characters will stay with you, as will their struggles and journey. An absolute joy to read, and a must-read if like me you still carry that Buffy nostalgia in your heart, and want to see what that can become with a fresh voice, and new elements. Also perfect for anyone who loves sapphic stories, with a healthy streak of pining for good measure, and found family in the form of friendship. I’m absolutely nabbing a physical copy for my shelf as this is one I already want to revisit, and I am really hoping (especially with the ending) that the author will write more in this setting, and even if not Brown is an author I will be keeping an eye out for in the future.

Damned If You Do follows 17 year old Cordelia (Cordy) Scott as she deals with many stressful things in her life, including being the stage manager of her school’s play, her possibly unrequited crush on her best friend, Veronica, and her tense relationship with her mom. Oh..and she also made a deal with a demon years ago to send her father to Hell and now the demon is back to send her to Hell unless she traps another demon. Normal teenage problems. 😂 What could possibly go wrong??

I had a blast reading this book! I loved Brown’s writing and characters. There were many hilarious and horrific moments, and tons of demon fighting action. Buffy fans are sure to enjoy this one!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Not my cup of tea. I dnfed it at 35%. Fantasy lovers may still enjoy it. It has the potential. Big it's just not for me.

I was initially drawn to this book because it followed Filipino folklore and queer characters. Firstly, that level of representation is so important and something that I didn't have as a teenager.

Overall, this is a quick and fun story. Cordelia is a well-rounded main character, and the supporting cast is excellent. I do wish the worldbuilding and the folklore incorporations had been a little more rounded, but I still enjoyed this book.I am looking forward to reading what Alex Brown releases next.

Readers who visit Ruin's End will be rewarded by their time with high school drama student Cordelia Scott and her updated Scooby Gang as they discover the Hellish truths behind both their town's and some of their families' histories. You'll never look at a Maleficent Precious Moments figurine the same way.

Cordelia Scott's abusive father ran away after he tried to kill her, or so she thought her entire life. Until, Fred, the new guidance counselor, tells her that he's the demon that she summoned that day to take her dad down to Hell. Fun times. And now he's telling her that her town was created by a deal with a demon and if said-demon makes another deal on the hundredth anniversary if the town, loads of demon towns will start popping off everywhere???? So she has to trap him. And it's no easy feat, especially since she has no idea where to start and now there's an aswang flying around town? When will it stop???

This started soooo good. I loved the humor and the revelation by Fred was simply everything. I laughed out loud. There were a couple moments in the book where I laughed like that again but they got fewer and farther between after the beginning. I still enjoyed this book overall, the main character was pretty interesting and I really liked Fred. The other side characters though fell a bit into the background for me and even Cordelia sometimes lacked something. It all got a bit repetitive in the middle there. The romance part was also a bit frustrating and I'm usually all for friends to lovers but I didn't see or feel their connection for most of the book.
I did really enjoy the world though and the humor, so overall, this was a pretty good debut. I will be checking out whatever Alex Brown writes next.

This is one of the best YA novels I’ve ever read.

A horror— which isn’t usually my genre unless I’m reading Horns or anything else from Joe Hill— this is also a novel about self-discovery and romance with enough snarky humor to have me randomly laughing out loud, startling my dogs.

In Ruin’s End, things seemed normal enough when the book started… Cordelia is struggling in a class, mentions imaginary numbers (note: don’t ignore these, you may end up like me and use them every day for work 🥴) until very quickly, she realizes she made a deal with a demon.

And it’s time to pay up.

I loved the chaos of this story— the pacing makes you not want to put it down, the chapter formatting is cheeky and frankly aesthetically pleasing, and Cordelia’s commentary throughout is delightful.

I want to be friends with her.

I really enjoyed the other characters, her fellow theater friends, whether that be her best friend Veronica, who she not-so-secretly is in love with, or much more unexpected friendships (both of which I loved).

The romance here is my favorite kind— when you cannot imagine these characters apart. I want to see Cordelia and Veronica growing together.

Especially given they’re so protective of each other. It’s swoon-worthy, y’all.

The Filipino folklore is really cool (their monster makes my Swiss Sack Man look like a teddy bear), and the baddies are absolutely terrifying.

If you want to see an amazing teenage girl try to save the world from demons, find herself, and have some awesome characters supporting her, this is your read.

I want more from these characters! Please. This gets all my stars and highest recommendation.

Cordelia Scott has a lot going on. First of all, it’s tech week for the high school play; secondly, her position as stage manager is in jeopardy because of her grades; thirdly, she just found out that on a past Deal Day, she sent her father to Hell and lost a part of her soul; fourthly, she’s in love with her best friend and lastly, demons are real! Damned If You Do by Alex Brown is a hilarious story about Cordy from Ruin’s End, who must risk it all to capture a demon with the assistance of Fred, her guidance counselor and also demon, in order to save her soul. This novel hooked me immediately. It’s funny and has short chapters with humorous chapter names. It’s a queer horror comedy YA novel that is perfect for spooky season or any time. Thanks to Alex Brown, Page Street Kids/Page Street Publishing and NetGalley for the ARC.

This books deserves a spot on your tbr for Summerween and the upcoming spooky season. Think early days Buffy when the still needed to be formed but sapphic and queer with Filipino folklore.

The styling of the chapter titles reminds me of Friends, those episodes all start with "the one where.." the chapters in this book all start with "in which". That's pretty cool!

Damned if you do is action packed with a slowburn romance and plenty of gore to go around. The story revolves around our fmc Cordelia, who accidentally struck a deal with a demon 7 years ago trying to espace her abusive father. TW: If you've suffered abuse and/or have active triggers regarding parental abuse this might not be the book for you. The subplot surrounding Cordelia is heavily focused on dealing with the consequences of the abuse and the choice she made 7 years ago.

This book has it all; fast paced, action packed, Filipino folklore, demons, humor, mutual pining, conquering your demons (literally and figuratively). So there's really no reason why this shouldn't be on your tbr!~

The only thing that messed with the flow a little was Cordelia's relationship with her mother; sometimes the information didn't feel like it added to the story.

First of all, the cover to this book is amazing and it’s extremely difficult to do it justice with a photograph. The bright orange automatically drew me to the book and I the small details within the illustration make this a truly great cover!

Beyond the cover, the book itself is great. The author came up with clever titles for each chapter and the story itself is equally clever and fun. I absolutely loved the main character, Cordelia. Although this is a horror/paranormal book, there was humor woven into Cordelia’s thoughts and her banter with some of the other characters. The story itself was unique (at least to me) and the pacing was great with backstory interwoven throughout so that the reader can understand why things are happening without pages and pages devoted to world-building and character development.

I loved this book and I’m eager to recommend it to my high school students and see what they think about it!

Damned If You Do
by Alex Brown
Pub Date: 01 Aug 2023

Queer Buffy the Vampire Slayer meets Filipino folklore in this horror comedy about a high school stage manager who accidentally sells her soul to a demon.

Seven years ago, Cordelia Scott’s abusive father left without a word, and life has been normal ever since. The seventeen-year-old spends her days stage managing the school play (which is going great, if anyone asks), pining over her best friend, Veronica, and failing one too many pop quizzes.

She’s never been sad that her father left, but she knows something is...missing. When her school guidance counselor, Fred, reveals during a session that he’s actually a demon, she learns that something is indeed missing: a piece of her actual soul. Why? She unwittingly made a deal with him to make her father disappear – then bargained to have the memory erased. To make matters worse, Fred is here to make another bargain: Help him with a “little” demonic problem, or she’s doomed to spend eternity in Hell with her father.

The deal? Help Fred neutralize a rival demon, who means to do more harm in her hometown than your average demon deal.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I really only have one word to describe this book: fun. If you loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but want a little more diversity, and a little less... problematic creator issues, this is the book for you. It has the same banter, great character relationships, demons and creatures, and even a great mentor (this time he's a guidance counselor who also happens to be a demon, which...again, fun!). The ending seems like it's leaving a door open for potential sequels, and I am here for it. I want more of the Cordelia/Veronica romance, more Sal and Dustin (I'd love to see them more on page and grow more), and especially more Fred! (What's the deal with him and Barry, anyway?)

In conclusion: please, Alex Brown, I would like a sequel, please, thank you.

This is a YA Horror Comedy novel following Filipino-American teen Cordelia Scott. Cordelia is focused on her role as stage manager of the school play while neglecting her grades. Her teachers stage an intervention by the new guidance counselor Fred. Cordelia doesn't know that Fred is the demon who sent her father to hell seven years ago. Fred tells Cordelia that when they made the deal to send her father to hell, it also sent a part of Cordelia's soul to hell. She must complete her end of the deal to get the missing piece back, performing a favor for Fred. Fred wants her to help him trap the demon who created the town in a Maleficent figurine to prevent demon capitalism.

I enjoyed this book! I'm not a horror girly, so I was hesitant to read this ARC, but once I started reading, I could not put this novel down. Cordelia's pining for Veronica and her struggle with her perception of herself as a monster like her father for sending him to hell created an interesting tension throughout the plot. I liked the elements of Filipino folklore that were included. Cordelia's motley crew of friends was also interesting, and it would be cool to see what happens next. I would love to see Cordelia and her crew tackle the issue of Veronica being able to transform into an aswang.

I received a free copy of this book via Turn the Page Tours and am voluntarily leaving a review.

Cordelia Scott (Filipino, 17) made a deal with a demon to send her abusive father to Hell when she was ten, which resulted in losing a piece of her soul. Cordelia is offered the chance to get it back by teaming up with Fred (the demon she made the deal with) to stop another demon in town who is on the warpath.

I absolutely loved Cordelia and her best friend Veronica (Filipino). It’s clear that they are both in love with each other but neither one says anything, which leads to SO much pining.

I loved the Filipino folklore that was interwoven through out the story. Aswang are absolutely terrifying, and that still stands in this book.

All of the side characters were fantastic. Even though Fred is a demon, you honestly can’t help but love him and his sarcastic, grumpy demeanor.

I’m not sure if this book will turn into a series, but I would love to see more adventures from Cordelia and her found family group as they go after more demons!

This isn’t my first time reading Alex Brown’s published work (anthologies for the win!), but I had such a fun time reading her debut novel, definitely leaning into the comedy of this horror comedy. It’s a romp through a ridiculous deal with a demon that weaves in a queer love story, Filipino culture, exploring the feeling of the monster within, and the general horrors of tech week for a musical. It was almost silly at times and both heart wrenching and healing at others, all told with a sincere earnestness. Definitely a debut worth reading!

As far as horror comedies go, I would say it definitely has the energy of an early 2000s supernatural drama, more fun and less scary than traditional horror but enjoyable all the same. The demons are definitely scary, but the scariest parts are what plays off real life, not the supernatural. The overall plot and vibes are fun while still keeping me intrigued, Brown does well at keeping the stakes up throughout the entire book, but the real heart comes into play with the characters.

Character-wise, this book is pretty great. While I would have loved to see even more development of some characters, I loved the growth and redemption arcs that we did get to see on-page, especially as far as Cordelia’s growth and healing went. The relationship between Fred and Cordelia is also pretty funny while also taking on a great emotional spin. I love a good in-love-with-my-best-friend moment and this book certainly had that in spades, but I would’ve loved to see them talk and develop their relationship even more than they did!

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this book, from the fun chapter titles, to the gritty explorations of self. It really is reminiscent of shows like Buffy, with its own spin along the way. I would definitely recommend it!

Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for this ARC in exchange for my honest review!

This book was so good! I read Alex’s short stories in both The Gathering Dark & Night Of the Living Queers and was looking forward to her debut novel. I don’t know much about Filipino folklore so I was looking forward to learning, but I’m always down for a queer demon fighting team. I’m also not familiar with Buffy, but I’ll have to check out more about it after this.

Cordelia and Veronica were so cute. I’m always so glad for strong friend groups in these sort of books, and Cordy’s friend group was the best. Although her home life was awful and school wasn’t the best, she always had people who were there for her and on her side. I wasn’t a huge fan of her Mom and the ending wasn’t as satisfying with their relationship as I had wanted, but I’m glad she got her ending.

I’m always a sucker for characters who fight their demons, and Cordy does this figuratively and literally. She was a lovable and relatable character. I’m very impressed with her demon hunting/going to school balance. I also just wanted to hug her throughout the whole book. What she was going though broke my heart. If there’s more to this universe, I’ll always sign up to read it.