**Thank you to NetGalley and the author for the eARC of this collection of poems!**

I always find it hard to review poetry since it is so subjective. While I really enjoyed this collection of poems, it was extremely dark and moody and I feel that this would have been a 5 star read for me at a different point in my life.

Themes of identity and struggle really spoke to me through some of these works and even the title alone hooked me from the moment I saw it.

Definitely check this one out for a somber, rainy day read or for a quick deep dive into darkness. This collection may be just what you need!

Unfortunately, I did not download the ARC on time, therefore I could not read it. Totally my mistake, I didn't realize the archive date had been surpassed. So, I give 1 star not because it was bad, but because I genuinely cannot give it a fair and honest rating and I can't not give 0 stars, which would be the better option since I did not read the book.

Apologies to the publisher.

Thank you to the author Mark Engelsson and as always NetGalley, for an advance digital copy of WHAT IF WHAT'S INSIDE ME ISN'T ME.

WHAT'S INSIDE ME is Engelsson's first book of poetry, and he favors the lyrical style. In this volume, he mostly covers the topics of romantic love and existential conflict, often as horror poems. The poetry is quite easy to relate to, not only because the themes are relevant, but because Engelson's language has a point to get to and does so. I enjoy his use of the repeated last line in quatrains also. I almost never see this, but Engelson includes poet's notes on each of the included poems at the end of the collection. So if you've ever wondered, <i>what the heck was that poem saying?</i>, now you can find out! Strictly speaking.

My favorite poems are Petrichor, Down We Go, Let Go, And All That It Entails, and Watery Grave.

From "Petrichor:"
<i>I love the smell of rain cascading from the heavens.
It's the scent of promise, of growth.
It speaks to me in whispers of the possibility
that all can be renewed.
It brings a time of cleansing;
Sins are forgotten, heartache is soothed.</i>

Rating: 🌧🌧🌧.75 / 5 rainclouds
Recommend? Yes
Finished: May 6 2023
Format: Advance Digital, NetGalley
Read this if you like:
🪶 Lyric poetry
🏚 Horror stories
👹 Monsters within
❤️‍🩹 Dark romance

Thank you Netgalley and Xpresso Book Tours for this arc!

«What’s trapped inside me must be free,
But what if what’s inside me isn’t me?»

What initially caught my attention was the title of this poetry collection. It spoke to a particular feeling I share an intimate relationship with, but never seem to be able to articulate. This collection definitely feels deeply personal, and this is amplified by the following commentary. I really appreciated that. The foreword predicted a thought I had: the poems are diverse, but almost in a manner that I couldn’t seem to fully grasp the intention behind. However, Engelsson explains that the poems in this collection make up parts of who he is and that I can relate to. It’s impossible to capture what it means to be human, as well as the complexity of one’s inner life, through one, single theme. As such, Engelsson’s poems delve into the lighter, but mostly darker, sides of being human.

While the poems were enjoyable to read, I had trouble to connect deeply with any of them. Whether it was the language, the form, or the content is hard to say. Contemporary poetry written in free verse is not my favorite type of poetry, but I always hope to be proven wrong, and so I keep searching.

This collection was short and deeply personal, but in the end it wasn’t for me. I do think this has an audience, and so I still recommend picking this up for a night time read with a cup of your favorite tea if you find yourself in the mood for some quiet contemplation.

thank you netgalley for this ARC
this was my first time reading non Arab poetry and it was a great experience I am not really into poems but this collection was very enjoyable. it contained so many unexpected pieces, the writing is beautiful. i loved the diversity of themes.

‘What if what’s inside me isn’t me’ is a really original collection of poetry which analyses what it really makes us human. Engelsson writes with a focus on the light and dark sides of our day to day lives from the reliance and impact of social media to the corruption of society as a whole.
I liked the way he captured so many layers of meaning into the simplest of everyday moments and he also adapts his poetic forms to his subject matter. Engelsson really addresses all aspects of life within a very concise collection of verses and I enjoyed these variations immensely.
For me what really made this work so original was the additional commentaries of the poems, these give us a background as to how the words came together and what sparked the inspiration for them. After reading these additional notes I went back to re-read some of my favourites, mostly of darker themes, and loved how I found different nuances within them now in the loop of the poet’s original intentions. Overall a very strong debut.