Thank you to NetGalley, Avon Books and Harper Ford for allowing me to read an ARC of this book.

Synopsis

Frankie is divorcing her twatface husband of 20 years and starting over. Her son is also off to university which leaves her with an empty nest. Her best friend introduces her to the world of online dating. As she works her way around casual hook-ups to make up the time is she missing out on true love with Stef, a handsome Slovakian man who has joined her quilting club at his mother's behest.

The reader is taken along for the ride as Frankie navigates her way through the catfishes, negging and ghosting. Who knew online dating can be such a minefield?! I thoroughly enjoyed the authors take on the perils of online dating as the majority of relationships nowadays are built this way. The only thing that I didn't really get on board with was Frankie's relationship with Stef. I just felt that it was just a bit rushed and there was not much time given in the book to building the connection between the two.

Overall I would recommend if you want to read a light hearted novel that will quite literally have you laughing out loud.

Decorum (and maybe copyright law) prevents me from reprinting the opening line of Divorced, Not Dead. But after I nearly spit my coffee across the Avenue U Dunkin Donuts, I decided it’s the “Call me Ishmael” of dirty rom-coms. It’s a nearly perfect foreshadowing of what’s to come, even if I was mildly grossed out with her suggestion of uses for a medium-sized cactus plant.

Frances “Frankie” Brumby has finally crawled her way out of a loveless marriage at age 50. Thanks to a small inheritance, she’s started over with a sewing shop and a little flat in her hometown of Lincolnshire, England. After a weed-smoking shed session with her best friend, Bel, she embarks on a journey into the world of online dating. Along the way she tries to make her shop a profitable place, starting with a Monday Night quilting circle. Among the “hotbed of quilters” is Stef, a handsome designer who’s escorting his mom into the group. The sparks are undeniable, even as Frankie sows her oats and Stef readiness himself for an arranged marriage in Slovakia.

Frankie makes for a very relatable protagonist. She earns her underdog credentials by describing her twenty-year slog with her son’s father, which includes total bankruptcy. The first-person narrative is about as down-to-earth as it gets, with syntax and grammar unmistakably the voice of this everywoman. Of course, Frankie’s language is peppered with more F-bombs than Joe Pesci in Goodfellas. So if you’re not ready for the supposed contrast of humble quilters putting a platoon of Marines to shame, maybe walk away slowly.

Starting a business at any age is daunting, and the anxiety Frankie feels is communicated very clearly. So is her foray into the online dating world: I felt I was with her as she dipped her toe in the icky pool of Match.com and sites like them. This element in particular gets the most attention and most detail: each site, each date, each casual sex escapade gives us a nearly manual-like instruction on what a new dater would experience. Ford absolutely knows how to “show, don’t tell” for the things she wants us to see.

The early reviews aren’t wrong: there are a few LOL moments, beyond my spit-take at the onset. Frankie might be an everywoman, but she has a PhD in snark (there are so few of us). Her take on the bad dates and absurdities is rakish, clever, and unique. Perhaps she uses “I’d rather” so often that I used my Kindle to count the instances, but the humor made this forgivable. Also, I swore I saw a nice little transformation, whereby Frankie became a different person by the end. More confident and appreciative, and an emerging middle-class heroine.

At times I felt it was hard to concentrate on one storyline at a time. Ford shows us early on that the most important part of the story is Frankie’s search for love. But she’s also developing a shop, moving on from her husband, looking out for her son and best friend, and maybe falling for Stef. Those themes tend to get overshadowed by a laundry list of dating adventures, which get to be a bit much toward the end. The success of the quilting group seems a bit rushed.

Also, despite the language, spice lovers will be a little disappointed. Frankie takes her dates by the hand, leads them to the bedroom…then shuts the door. She doesn’t kiss and tell, I suppose: no description of the action whatsoever. When I compare this to other books in this genre I’ve read, even ones without the preponderance of F-bombs, this was a surprise.

Finally, I’m curious to know what the average reader thinks of Stef. I’ve got my reasons, but my like-o-meter tipped toward “Nah,” especially toward the end. I get that there’s supposed to be some tension, but I think he stepped over the line more than once. Would I have expected Frankie to tolerate some of his ideas? Hmm…

Ford does what the book jacket says: puts us in the shoes of a likeable protagonist in a familiar but very personal situation. She makes us laugh, cry, and curse like a sailor on every page. Divorced, Not Dead is worth a try for anyone with a constitution strong enough to enter the creepy world of middle-age online dating.

Thank you to NetGalley and Avon Publishing for an advance copy in exchange for my honest review.

This took me a bit to get into, but when I did.. I was fucking hooked. I was constantly laughing my ass off and in absolute hysterics.
Aside from being hilarious, I noticed I got pissed off a fair amount for Frankie haha. Safe to say, she grew on me.
Overall just a super funny, relatable romcom.

An amusing story even though some of it went over my head at times, I still enjoyed it very much. Hilarious. My thanks to netgalley and the publishers for giving me the opportunity to read this book in return for an honest review.

This book is hilarious, So funny and well written. Frankie is a great character and she brought a smile to my face. A fun and enjoyable read.

What a hoot of a book! I rarely venture into this style of book but I am so glad I did. This is pure escapism. If you like books with plenty of wit and laughs mixed with feel-good moments and a touch of romance that’s far from slushy this is for you. A very enjoyable read indeed.

Frankie is down on her luck and not giving a f*uck states the cover which sums this up so well. Frankie is 50 something and has escaped her miserable coercive controlling husband of two decades that she accurately calls Twatface which is how he pops up on her phone also. She’s been left with nothing from her divorce that’s good but is determined to not curl up in a corner and become a total hermit. Her son lives away from home and I loved this very honest and real relationship.

She opens a small quilting shop which leads to the entrance of a bunch of awesome people in a new little quilting group she kicks off. This book gave me so many laugh out loud moments but if you are prudish at all this ain’t for you. This is not a book that holds back on the realities of shitt* relationships and the perils of internet dating.

Her friend encourages her to go in some dating apps and the book gives you a hilarious education via Frankie into catfishing (she gives back to these catfish in the most brilliant of ways), benching, bread-crumbing, sexting, beige men and kinky fetishes of others (mind-boggling for Frankie). After a sexless marriage she decides a few dalliances with younger guys, no strings attached could be fun. She also quickly realises a lot of men are bigger twats than Twatface himself. As confidence grows and she embraces all of herself she gets bolder and braver but also learns it can come with a lot of pitfalls.

It’s very open and honest about sex, dating and all manners of sexual preferences. It’s not all about that though. Frankie makes new friendships and when the man who makes her flutter (in a few areas) enters her shop it’s game on for Frankie. But nothing is smooth sailing, this is no smooshy fluffy love story. In fact it’s darn realistic as to the good the bad and the ugly. The mixed dynamics between them is brilliant.

She becomes confident and gutsy and gives what-for to so many of these blokes who lie and cheat and treat women badly. It’s really funny in so many moments. If you cringe at sex talk, blunt speech and the rights of women to embrace enjoying sex for the fun of it then you may be offended. But not me. I loved this.,I loved watching her develop into a bold woman despite a world of pitfalls on the way. Ugly nude photos sent from men on apps can put you off your dinner!

Will she get the man who gives her flutters? Will he do his best to give her extra flutters? You’ll have to read it. I love that the Author includes a glossary of commonly used terminology around internet dating, online slang and definitions of sexual preferences like Asexuality and Pansexuality. These come up through her connections and experiences in her journey.

It’s very in your face and I loved that. A brave novel, very funny and a book I think anybody who has entered the terrifying world of internet dating sites will relate to. A really great book to lose yourself into and have a good giggle with Frankie and her exploits. A solid 4 stars!

If the world of 'flexting', 'catfishing' and 'negging' is alien to you, there's a handy glossary at the back of this gloriously rude, no-holds-barred book about stepping out into the dating world again at fifty-something. I certainly needed it (both the glossary and the giggles provided within its pages).

Frankie has moved on from her unhappy marriage. She has a strong relationship with her son, Jay, and best friend, Bel, and is building up her quilting business. Now, I have to say that all the beautiful descriptions of fabrics and colours and techniques did not persuade me to take it up as a hobby, but I loved how it knitted together a small community of like-minded (and sometimes absolutely not like-minded) people.

The dating sites and the horrors contained within are not for the faint-hearted. But Frankie is determined to find what she's looking for, even if she really has no clue what that is after years of feeling like a lodger in my own life. Even in the Mondayest Monday in the Januaryest of Januarys, her positivity shines through.

Some of the lines I highlighted probably won't pass the censors on other sites. Suffice to say, I laughed (a lot), had all the happy, romantic feels (no spoilers) and rooted for Frankie all the way. And I'll never see chilli powder in quite the same way again…

I really enjoyed the humour in this book and it really did make me laugh out loud on a number of occasions. Whilst I don’t think I’m the intended target for this book and therefore couldn’t relate personally, I still found the story really engaging and well-written.

Loved this book. Real and honest. Hilarious and touching. Thought provoking and insightful. I will definitely be keeping an eye out for new books by this author.

I found this a little up & down, I couldn’t warm to Frankie however did enjoy the dynamic between her & Stef… the dating was a bit crazy, is life really like that these days, maybe it is! I’m not sure this was for me, it wasn’t what I was expecting however I liked the unity between the hotbed of quilters & how friendship can be with people so unlike yourself .

Not for me. Far too many F words and so much info about dating apps and how they work. I struggled to like this character with her desperation to link up with strangers for sex. She didn't think or act like any fifty year old I know. Somehow the more gentle quilting side of her life failed to correct the balance. DNF.

I absolutely loved this brilliant book so much!
I treated myself to the audiobook version and it was just so entertaining.m, the narrator was perfect and really brought Frankie’s character alive.
Frankie is a fascinating character who I really could identify with, having left my own Twatface several years ago and having a similar experience with learning to love and trust again.
The gorgeous community of characters that surrounded Frankie were so wonderful. They all brought something special to the book with their own views on love. And the way they look out for Frankie was both uplifting and emotional.
I was absolutely captivated by the story, it was honest and funny in equal measure and I found it very hard to stop listening to it!
If you enjoy the Gill Sims Why mummy books, I’m sure you will love this one too, it has a similar sense of fun with some very emotional moments to make you think and become emotionally invested in the characters and their situations.
A hugely enjoyable book.

What a funny story that highlights being divorced isn't always a negative and you can be fun after. Great writing style

Divorced Not Dead is a fresh and honest exploration of starting over after a controlling relationship. Frankie is a courageous and compassionate woman who is determined, with help from her friends, old and new, to find a new, more fulfilling life. It is heartwarming and humorous but also poignant and relevant. I like that the main protagonist is female and fifty, the contemporariness and the humour of this story.

I received a copy of this book from the publisher.

I adored this book and laughed and laughed and would highly recommend this book
many thanks to netgalley and the publishers for the opportunity to read this book

An absolute gem of a book with writing that is laugh out loud funny taking us on a journey of post-divorced Frankie as she tackles dating apps and all the pitfalls that come with them to find love or just a good time. But this is also a story of a fifty-something woman being positive after her divorce taking her life in a better direction, filling it with new friends from her quilting group set up in her new business shop. With a supportive best friend who is both a bad and good influence, it’s a journey you will want to share with her.

The characters are very relatable and wonderfully written in a style I found refreshing with some rather fruity language drawing you immediately in to wanting to follow this new life Frankie battles to make. With plenty of ups and downs, this is definitely a story of hope and proof that there is still a life to live after divorce with plenty of fun along the way.

Many thanks to NetGalley for a copy in return for an honest review.

This book started off with a bang- I was instantly engaged. Sadly it limped along to a less than stellar finish- still worth a read though.

This was an entertaining, well-written book. It was fun, relatable and kept me reading to find out what was going to happen. I enjoyed this book and would recommend it to others.

That intro was just too funny...😂 Hahahaha I started this book while having breakfast and when I read that first sentence I spit out my orange juice.

Now, damn I feel so weird by giving this review!!! Listen I know many of us had sexualized humans in a moment of our lives but this lady, she went too far, to the point that it was uncomfortable. A guy couldn't even talk to her or exist without her looking at him in a cringe thirsty way. Calling guys delicious and snack, for example, not just handsome, but many other things. Looking at their bodies and all those thoughts are out there. This Frankie lady has some vocabulary and was just uncomfortable for me. I get it, she just got divorced and wants to "catch up" but damn lady relax that thirsty side, just a bit.

There's also too much swearing and hey I love swearing, but with the mix of all that thirsty stuff was too much. It was like anyone in the book was capable of talking without swearing. Even the talks between mother and son were full of swearing and not even the light swearing. The fight between the love interest also was too offensive.

I never felt the romance between Frankie and Stef. Sadly I didn't. Because I truly wanted to, as a divorced woman myself, I wanted that beautiful romantic side. I think with all the swearing and thirsty behavior was hard to imagine the character in love.

I didn't enjoy this book. I felt it was unnecessarily long and even with all the cute friendships it felt heavy for me. There's great moments in the book but, to be honest, the FMC didn't allow me to enjoy them. Her inside talks / thoughts were too loud and got judgy and cringe.

I'm divorced myself, I have been on dating apps and kinda hate them now. I was married to a narcissist too. So I wanted to feel connected. But all I think Frankie needed was therapy 🙊🙈

At the end of the day the book wasn't for me at all. It has great reviews so I bet others will enjoy, sadly I didn't.

Thank you to netgalley, publisher and author for my arc in exchange of an honest review.
Because of my feelings on the book I won't be posting this review on my social media and will post the blurb, not to affect others to read it.

Divorced not Dead has Frankie now finally free of a controlling husband and starting life with her own new business, with the help of her friend Bel she embarks on a mission to start dating. After over twenty years of marriage and her loving son now starting university she determined to start living her life to the full.
This story is about internet dating and what to avoid and how to tell who are the genuine honest men apart from the idiots and perverts. It takes us on Frankie journey to put herself out there and discover how hard it is at times to find someone that is genuine and not a weirdo.
There are some good characters in the book and at times I found it amusing, though not particular hilarious.
My thanks to net galley and publisher for the opportunity to review this book honestly.