Soundtrack of Silence is the kind of memoir everyone should read. It details the author’s experience with hearing loss, going deaf, and the many complications that came with both—all while in the prime of his life. It’s a tough read in many ways, but also one that will build deeper empathy with the deaf community. Part of why I chose to read this memoir is because my mom is hard of hearing (though not deaf). Another key reason is its infusion of music in the author’s life and recovery process. And while I was certainly excited to read this memoir, I was blown away by how powerful it truly is.

Matt Hay begins his life story with his childhood and how, unbeknownst to him and his family, he was already hard of hearing. He describes the workarounds he developed as a child and which carried him into college. However, by the time he was in his early 20s, his hearing loss would become impossible to ignore. The diagnosis was devastating… but something he tackled with bravery and determination.

He describes hearing loss and deafness so vividly. I’m fortunate enough to have good hearing, and his descriptions helped me to really get a feel for what it’s like to lose an entire sense. I also loved how he described the value of music in his life and how he worked to memorize a playlist of his favorite songs. He didn’t just memorize the lyrics and melody; he worked to make note of each instrument, each harmony, each instance of vibrato or reverb or echo. As an avid music fan, it’s hard to imagine never hearing my favorite artists or songs again, let alone any new music. I love how music became a touchstone in Matt’s life and, ultimately, a valuable part of his recovery later on.

I was fascinated to learn about Matt’s rare condition and all the treatments and surgeries that would go into not only keeping his hearing for as long as possible, but would be necessary to keep him alive and well overall. He details his various surgeries, unexpected side effects (sometimes quite significant!), and the difficult path to acclimating to his new abilities. For the squeamish readers out there, some chapters do dive into some tougher details. I hard a particularly hard time reading about his eye treatments after a necessary brain nerve surgery.

Through it all, Matt keeps a positive attitude. He also talks about his wife—without whom his journey would have been a lot harder. It’s the power of love to lift up someone in their time of need, when medical situations necessitate major life changes, and how a couple can get through it together. His family support is strong, and along with the music, is vital in his recovery.

Soundtrack of Silence is a must-read, whether or not you or someone you know has experienced hearing loss or deafness. It’s a powerful memoir about one man’s strength through it all, the family that stood beside him, and the music that carried him through deafness and more.

Wow.

I started reading this book because of the true perspective of a man who lost his hearing. Even as someone who loves music and was interested in Matt’s story, I stayed for the storytelling, wisdom, and family connections that went above and beyond what I expected out of this book.

Matt tells his story in a beautiful way, and his wisdom and intelligence shines through his perspective, all the way from when he was a child to the end of the book.

As a very fun side note, I greatly enjoyed reading some of the personal details he shared about himself, his wife, and their family. His father-in-law’s relationship with his wife reminds me deeply of my own with my stepdad, right down to the intellectual conversations over books and Hershey’s chocolate bars.

Whether you’re looking to learn from someone else’s perspective, gain insight into the Deaf community, or read about family and faith, you are sure to find a friend in this book.

I enjoyed the book and it was a quick read. The only downside was the medical terms but i skimmed over those and really enjoyed his take on his hearing loss journey!

I liked many elements of this book and if you are a music lover, all of the songs he references throughout will play in your head like your own accompanying soundtrack. It’s clear that music really shaped his upbringing and he feels that loss acutely. His story is really incredible and I really loved how much he credited his wife; a caretaker’s role is so often overlooked.

While he briefly touches on Deaf culture and community, I would be really interested in reading a review from this community as well.

Thank you to the author Matt Hay and Steve Eubanks, publishers St. Martin's Press, and NetGalley, for an advance digital copy of SOUNDTRACK OF SILENCE. All views are mine.

Opening Quotes: "If I took charge of what was being discussed, I had a better chance of figuring out what was being said." Loc.286

"As long as you are speaking you don't have to listen." Loc.286

Three (or more) things I loved:

1. I relate to the author's stories about trying to fool the hearing tests as a kid. I did the same, to try to protect myself, to try to be not such a disappointment or to stick out!

Three (or less) things I didn't love:

This section isn't only for criticisms. It's merely for items that I felt something for other than "love" or some interpretation thereof.

1. Both I and my father are hard of hearing. He wears hearing aids, but I don't. I can't say I've ever asked him if he feels walled off (Loc.66) because of his hearing, but as he sings tenor in two local choirs and goes to operas where he cranks up his hearing aids, I don't imagine he does much. I on the other hand have a few disabilities I can find isolating, but this isn't one of them. I wonder if I will have trouble connecting to this book's underlying belief system about disability in general, as a thing to be surmounted, rather than to be gotten along with.

2. I'm not a fan of this memoirist's voice. It's very dominant of its subject, which happens to be disability, which is a big part of my life also. I've never once felt "in control" of my disabilities; I feel fortunate, as an older adult, to merely have found a sense of balance with them. I'm really struggling to connect to this man's story.

3. Let Channing Tatum have this one. It is not written for the disabled community, me included. I suspect it's for the cheerleaders who want only to be inspired by disabled people overcoming disability, but unfortunately, many of us are surviving, not inspiring.

Rating: 🦻🦻/5 hearing devices
Recommend? Maybe; it's the voice that bothered me most.
Finished: Jan 9 '23
Format: Digital arc, Kindle, NetGalley
Read this book if you like:
👂 stories about hearing impairment
🩻 medical memoirs
🤷 boy's coming of age

As a music lover, this memoir hit hard! Just like Matt, music has played such a significant part of my personality, and just thinking that I would never be able to hear my favorite songs ever again takes the wind out of me.

But don’t go into this memoir thinking that you are going to find a Matt that is down on his luck for what life has dealt him. Instead, you will find how you can completely make life work for you when you have the determination, and the support of your loved ones (We all need a Nora in our lives!)

Also appreciated in this book: No over-dump of medical information. I did not skim or skip pages with this one 🙌🏽

LOVED!

I love memoir's and this was just what I expected. The way this story is written with sprinkled in songs, artists, and lyrics that make up the soundtrack of Matt's life make this an addicting read. I found it easy to connect with. I use music to help with my ptsd and mental health issues. I loved that Matt Hay reminds readers to "Don't Stop Believing" in human resilience and determination because I know that I struggle with that myself. I would recommend this book for sure.

This book was so inspiring. This is the story of a man who gradually loses his hearing as a young adult and the challenges and triumphs he faced in this process. Music played a huge part in his life and he was faced with the possibility of never being able to hear music again. He decided to commit his playlist to memory and notes song lyrics throughout the book. I was singing right along with him. It's amazing that even when bad things happened to him, he was able to fight back and now helps with others that have the same condition.

Amazed at how many medical hurdles the author went through. A very inspiring memoir of a very determined author.

This is one of the most inspiring memoirs I have ever read. Though it dealt with some difficult topics, I couldn't help but admire the author's determination to overcome the many medical hurdles he encountered. He gives a lot of the credit to his wife Nora who was there with him every step of the way. Having lived with a deaf roommate and older relatives who were hard of hearing, I could relate to some of his issues. What initially drew me to this book was the way he connected particular songs to the pivotal moments in his life. I have always done that myself and feel that music definitely plays an important role in the memorization process. Thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and the author for the opportunity to read and review an advance copy.

The amount of challenges a body can endure is pretty remarkable. In Soundtrack of Silence, author Matt Hay takes us through his journey with NF2 (Neurofibromatosis, Type 2,) a rare disorder that has affected him throughout his life, robbing him of his hearing, and tampering periodically with his mobility and balance.

Even more amazing is the human spirit, something that Matt has curated and strengthened while dealing with NF2, empowering him with a drive to move forward instead of wallow, and to share his story with a mixture of humor and wisdom.

This is an advanced copy that I’ve had for a while and, like so many other memorable books, appeared in my mood reading queue at just the right time. Here, at the beginning of a new year, where starting fresh and making resolutions is the norm, it was fascinating to read about someone whose medical challenges have necessitated that he make life resets in abundance. RE-solutions, or “solving again,” facing old challenges packaged in new ways with determination, is a pattern in which both Matt and his incredible wife, Nora, have become veterans.

Simply put, NF2 is a (usually) genetic condition in which benign tumors grow along nerves. For Matt, the tumors’ location affects sound to effectively reach the brain. Confronting the removal of these tumors, which keep returning, is one thing. Recovery is another. The possibility of new medical issues arising from each surgery is something else. Factor in the strain on mental health, finances, and family, and this man has not had it easy.

So where does the soundtrack fit in? Despite grappling with sub par hearing most of his life, Matt Hay adores music. This is something to which I can relate. Melodies, lyrics, and the marriage of these elements with the right voice and instruments have sustained him in a formidable way. It may seem unfair that someone who loves music so much has struggled to hear it, but that struggle has also created insight and opportunity at different times. One of those tender mercies whose purpose unfolds when you least expect it.

This is an important book which will yield different takeaways for different readers. Some will feel inspired by Matt Hay’s dogged determination, some might decide to finally have their hearing checked, and still others will use his story as a way to put their own difficulties into perspective. Whatever the reason, it’s a book worth reading with an author worth knowing.

A beautiful memoir about how we all carry a (or many) soundtracks to our lives. Music can evoke memories of where we were or how we felt in a moment in time. For the author, there is special urgency to remembering the music as he progressively loses his hearing due to tumors and faces medical challenges as he deals with his illness. This book is hopeful and shines a light on love of family and self as well as gave me incredible insights into what it feels like to live in a "hearing" world. His descriptions of being very social at parties and how that changed for him when he could not follow the conversation anymore is incredibly poignant. A compelling and important read.

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for an ARC and I voluntarily left this review.

A beautifully written heart wrenching memoir.Mat Hay finds out a young age that he is losing his hearing .He connects his memories to music he listened to .I was so moved by his story this was a wonderful read.# netgalley #st.martins

St. Martin's Press provided an early galley for review.

Hearing loss is something with which I was familiar due to family member. I also was well-acquainted with the world of the hearing impaired thanks to my college years. The Rochester Institute of Technology campus was shared with the National Technical Institute for the Deaf so I learned a bit of sign-language during those years and was the chairperson for the Deaf Awareness committee of our student orientation service one year. So, the description of Hay's book really spoke to me when I first saw it.

Like Hay, I often match songs and lyrics to key moments in my life. That really made his message have a strong resonance with me. Plus, anyone who references Prince's 7 on the first page of their book is automatically a kindred soul to me. Some of the medical details unnerved me, but that's more about my nature than how they were presented (which was in a very understandable way).

Written in a friendly and approachable manner, Hay's words are touching and informative. His story has a lot to offer readers; it is a reminder of how we can sometimes take things in life for granted.

**Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press, and Matt Hay for an ARC of this book!**

Do you remember the very first time you were listening to a song...and were instantly transported back in time?

If you close your eyes now and think of that special song---maybe your last dance at the school prom, maybe the first song you blasted in your car the very first time you drove on your own after getting a driver's license...or the song that was playing in a coffee shop when you saw the love of your life for the first time---can you actually HEAR it in your mind's ear, and every sight, sound, and smell of the place you were when you heard it?

Now imagine that you found out that being able to relive those experiences was no longer going to be an option...because tumors were about to take your hearing away. Would you be able to train your brain to remember the ever-evolving soundtrack of your LIFE? To remember every nuance, every lyric, and every sound in your brain as clearly as your ears ever could?

For Matt Hay, this goal became his personal mission. Struggling with hearing loss as a child, he managed to 'get by' with many workarounds that hard of hearing children use...without even realizing he was working around anything. He participated in the normal vision/hearing checks at school (which by the way, during this time were conducted IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE CLASS (!)) and learned to mimic the appropriate hand raises when he just couldn't quite make out the noise and therefore passed all of his hearing checks without alarm from any adults.

When Hay was about to go off to West Point, however, all of this caught up with him...and he discovered that his hearing wasn't up to snuff to meet their entrance requirements. After a visit to the doctor, Hay found out that he has a rare condition called NF2 that was causing tumors to grow...and would not only affect his balance, but would eventually knock out his hearing. As an avid music lover who was just at the cusp of adulthood and just starting out in the working world, Hay was stunned that everything he knew was about to turn on its head for good. But Matt wasn't about to go through all of this alone: his now-wife Nora was by his side, and determined to be his ultimate support.

As Hay navigates the difficult decisions presented by his condition, he makes the choice to go one step further than his hearing aids and receives an Auditory Brain Implant. This was an incredibly risky move at the time, because the treatment was new and not heavily researched....but Hay's determination led the way. With aspirations to run a marathon, become a father, and of course, to train his brain to remember music SO well he can literally hear it from the inside...will Matt Hay prove that resolve and an iron will are stronger than any outside force? Or will the cruelty of fate take the power out of his hands...and the beauty of music from his soul...forever?

First off, this cover and the premise of this memoir is RIGHT up my alley. As a life-long melophile, the concept of coming up with a soundtrack of your life is nothing short of fascinating. I see music as one of the few true connectors across the world, a universal language that is so accessible, you don't need to 'learn' a single world. To hear about Matt's condition and the shocking way it was poised to take so much from him forever was TERRIFYING to me. Music is the soundtrack to my every thought (at times!) and I felt like I connected with Hay instantly on this level: music is so important, I could not imagine life without it...and to feel like you literally were staring down a clock with how much time you had 'left' being able to physically hear music was unfathomable. But rather than wistfully playing his favorite tunes over and over and wallowing in the tragedy of the situation...Matt Hay chose to rise above and actually TRAIN his brain to remember his favorite songs and what each one sounded like.

In short? Simply MIRACULOUS.

Obviously, if you AREN'T much of a music fan, there is another aspect of this memoir that probably won't click for you: Hay intersperses the whole text with song lyrics from ALL different genres, ranging from Guster to the Beatles to Simon and Garfunkel to Guns N' Roses...and even Three Six Mafia! If your musical taste is eclectic like mine, you'll do just fine. (And if it isn't...it just could inspire you to branch out!) What makes these excerpts even more impactful is how Hay relates them to whatever challenge or triumph was going on in his life at the time, from his medical challenges and choices to the exploration of his love story with his wonderful wife, Nora. (Side note: I do wish that Matt would have included a full playlist, either on Spotify or just in print, of every song mentioned in the book...plenty I knew, but it would have been fun to supplement the book with the actual songs too!)

There is a fair amount of medical jargon and explanations in the story at times, but I think Hay did an excellent job of not letting all of the technicalities feel overwhelming to the average reader. He even includes several helpful metaphors for the reader to get a better understanding of some of the facets of hearing loss that are hard to put down on paper. I struggled right along with him in his choice to implant the ABI (and was holding my breath the whole time!) and with his choice between other medical procedures (including one that involved surgically keeping his eye from staying open or closed all of the time...I won't say more, but it was intense!) All the while, I had such a strong sense of hope for him to be able to hear and for all of the choices to pay off in the long run...but you'll have to read to see how it all plays out!

At the center of Matt's tale, though, is the love of his life, Nora. And it is no wonder that Matt and Nora have had such a long and unyielding relationship. The sheer determination present in both of these two incredible people made them a match made in the stars, and Nora is the kind of support system, confidant, and friend that we all search for in life. Reading Matt's recollection of so many happy memories (some featuring songs, and some without) and also his vulnerability in sharing times of stress and strife helped flesh out the book. Aside from his own force of will and steely focus, it is the love of his family and friends that helped to propel Matt to even further heights...and he never takes a moment or a sentiment for granted.

And though I won't say how Matt's auditory journey progresses or what his 'new normal' sounds like...or if he finally gets to complete that Iron Man triathlon, or became a dad...

As for the beautiful, moving soundtrack of his life?

It is ANYTHING but silent!

4 stars

As someone who has tied so much of my life and memories to music this one really hit home.

Matt writes about the significance of music in his life and then his progressive hearing loss and the impacts it has had.

This is such a vulnerable memoir, and at times medically technical, but it drew me in. The honesty and the look into Matt’s life will leave a lasting impact for me.

A very profound memoir.

This is a memoir of Matt Hay gradually losing his hearing due a rare genetic disorder that grows tumors on his auditory and other nerves, the difficult surgeries he endured to try to counteract the tumors, and his dogged attempts to recover from them. It's a memoir of clinging to hearing, and especially the ability to process and enjoy music, at all costs; it's also the story of making hard choices over and over again without really having enough information to assess their potential challenges. Throughout the resulting setbacks, Hay remains remarkably buoyant. It's not a memoir of connecting to the Deaf community or learning ASL and alternate means of communication; throughout it, Hay remains firmly tied to the hearing world.

Thanks to the publisher, author, and Netgalley for my free earc. My opinions are all my own.

Matt's story amazed me especially because like the author I am a music lover and I sympathized with his hearing loss especially around music. This memoir is not just about a seemingly healthy person losing their hearing, it's medically more complicated because there were tumors which affected his hearing. While removing those tumors, Matt became partially paralyzed, a condition that improved but never completely went away.

Not only is Matt impressive for training and competing in an Ironman competition, my admiration goes to his wife for patiently stepping into the role of caregiver at an early age, later submitting to in vitro procedure to ensure their child was not born with the same condition and much more.

If you're like me and get frustrated with family, work or traffic in my mundane middle class existence, reading this was a reality check for me.

A very beautiful and heartwarming non-fiction book. Matt Hay seems like a really nice and emotionally intelligent man. Matt started losing his hearing at a young age, and this book made me tear up many times. The main problem I had is this book starts to feel repetitive very quickly. I liked how each chapter surrounds around a song. There were good points about this book and some bad parts. Good book just not very memorable.

Wow, this was a memoir like nothing I’ve ever read before. I found the subject matter and his life so interesting and captivating. We are a music family and this really touched me. I think this is a book that anyone tangentially connected to music will really appreciate, and it will get a lot of people thinking about how music impacts us. Congratulations to everyone working on this book! Thank you for the opportunity to read it early. I will definitely be telling people about it!