This was an interesting audiobook memoir about the author's personal experiences as a sex addict. The story was well done and the narration was good, but with such intimate details I think I would prefer reading it rather than listening to this story. Thanks to netgalley and the publisher for giving me the opportunity to listen to this audiobook.

First I would like to mention that I am NOT a sex addict (and if I was I would NOT be coming out here on social media, take my word for it! 🤣) So let's be clear, I chose to listen to this audiobook out of curiosity, most notably because it was written by a woman, and we definitely do not hear enough stories of women battling with this particular form of addiction. As such I cannot comment on the "self help" aspect of this book.

The content of the book is not terribly surprising. Sex addiction is as horrible as any other addiction. It's ugly and it destroys people and families. It is most definitely NOT "just an excuse to cheat", and we really must start excluding this "explanation". The author's story is heartbreaking, her bravery, her research and the desire to understand her own behavior and to educate people are certainly worthy of your time.

What baffled me though was her "solution". Don't get me wrong I am very VERY happy for her, and the fact that she was able to overcome this terrible addiction, but her heavy emphasis on the importance of the "spiritual" aspect of the "solution", well...it seems a bit "out there". In general, this particular author (being MD and all) seemed way too willing to try unproven techniques such as hypnosis (but I suppose this could be explained by pure desperation).

All in all a short and educational read, a bit heavy on the details (I am sure you can imagine). I just wish that the "solution" was a bit more scientific, and well...helpful to a wider audience.

What is this? Definitely not written for me, it’s surprisingly more graphics and stuff. I typically read.

The truly, fascinated, nevertheless

I wasn’t really sure what to expect when getting into this, but her story was interesting and gave a very good insight into her struggles.

I received a free Advanced Reading Copy via NetGalley in exchange for a complete and honest review.

One of the best books I've read in a long while.

I received an audiobook of this in exchange for my honest review. Thank you NetGalley,

Whew. This was an.... interesting listen?
This is a memoir about one woman's experience with sex addiction.
I do have to say there was some religious statements involved in the book which ... I wasn't a huge fan of.

Outside of that, the book was a little interesting. I'm glad it was on the shorter side, [ 122 pages ]... as it was a little ... slow / boring at times. There isn't' a whole LOT of substance to this book... It was okay, but nothing I'd read or listen to again.

If you like spice +10 then this is the book for you. Spicy and sexy ,this is a cruise ship story that you will enjoy. It is borderline porn but that’s what makes it so juicy I give it 3.75 stars

I enjoyed listening to Paulina describe her struggles and triumphs. As someone who has lived with addiction, and also has loved ones in the throes of addiction, I appreciated her blunt and honest journey through recovery. It was a short listen, but I feel like it was pretty well done. I do feel like the timeline could have been a little neater, but it was informative all the same.

Very well written. This happens more than people know. I enjoyed reading the book. I'm glad she got through it and it didn't mess up her marriage.

2 stars

I’m glad this writer is sharing her story & experiences with sex addiction, eating disorders, & substance abuse, & how she was able to get help rebuild her life & family. These are issues that should be talked about more to lessen stigma. However, this book could use more help from a professional editor or ghost writer to reach a wider audience.

[What I liked:]

•The writer has an interesting story to share, seems like a caring person, & is brave to talk about her struggles with addiction. Hopefully this book can open doors for more women to talk about taboo subjects like sex addiction that need to be addressed in our society.


[What I didn’t like as much:]

•This book is short & kind of jumps around a lot. I feel like it should either be fleshed out into a more full memoir, or condensed down into a long-form article. I understand that the writer wants to preserve her privacy by not sharing too many personal details, and that’s not what I’m asking for more of; I think it would be better to get a more in depth understanding of her feelings & thoughts in relation to the major life changes she documents, though.

•I think this book could benefit from more editing. A good editor could help shape the structure & format of this book.

•Some of the conclusions the writer comes to at the end made me uncomfortable. Particularly the parts about how she believes her son was born with disabilities so he (and she as his caregiver) can suffer to pay back a karmic debt. I don’t know her or her son so I don’t want to make unfair judgements, but that part seems ableist.

CW: sexism, ableism, substance abuse/addiction, eating disorders, infidelity

[I received an ARC ebook copy from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review. Thank you for the book!]

My secret life as a Sex addict is a great short memoir about how she has lived with her addiction to sex and food.
This is a good book for someone who wants to start reading memoirs. I

While I applaud Paulina Pantyleva for being so candid in telling her story, I do feel that some of the language used, and perspectives taken in the book can be problematic and maybe even harmful. Starting from the beginning, when Pantyleva is discussing her fears in writing her book, she says she fears that a "pussy-faced motherfucker" is going to read her book and reveal her true identity. While I can understand this fear, using the term "pussy" as a pejorative ks ahrmful to women. Also, when Pantyleva describes being groomed as a child by an older child, she says that she doesn;t liek the term victim bevcause she doesn't feel like she was absued, but then goes on to describe how her reactions and behaviors (i.e., hypersexualized behavior and seeking validation through sexual fantasy addiction) mao onto the experiences of other vuctims and survivors of sexual assault and abuse. While her description of addiction is not medically accurate, I can look past it as her description ultimately led her to seek out help and treatment that worked for her. Something I can;t look past is her use of terms "free from addiction," being "cured of her addiction," or that she is "no longer a sex addict." Using terms like these ar enot only out of line with the addiction research, but can give a misleading and potentially harmful representastion of addiction treatment and the possible outcomes. While I am not an addict, but have seen addiction destroy many people I love, and I can tell you from my own obervations and reading scientific literature, that addiction does not go away and it is not something from which you can be cured– it is something you will fight against for the restof your life. Yes, there may be seasons of life where your struggle against addiction is easier thanothers, but it is not gone.

I am in no way trying to discredit Pantyleva's experience or the hard-fought battles in her life. In facg, I applaud her candor and bravery in telling her story, I just think that maybe having a sensitivity reader or even someone to make sure that her statements about treatment were accurate representations of what other addicts could expect (or to even point out that her experience is atypical) would have been useful.

Very nice, short, interesting listen. I am not a sex addict, however I did vaguely know the gist of the addiction before reading this book. I think it is empowering and meaningful when women share their experiences to help others, show them that they are not alone, educate, and to show their own perspective be it one of many or to be the first female voice shared. I did find this book educational and I do recommend it!

Thank you to Netgalley and Paulina Pantyleva for the ALC Audiobook! ♥

My Secret Life as a Sex Addict was an interesting listen, provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This was an interesting story, read by the author. It had some really interesting parts, but I feel like it jumped around quite a bit. I applaud the author for sharing her story, but I had a hard time getting into her experience. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but this wasn’t it.

To my regret, this wasn't even the kind of audiobook I was expecting. I couldn't hear it until the end. It has too much technical language that didn't let me empathize with the main character. I'm really sorry I don't like to leave any reading halfway through, but it's really not for me.

My Secret Life as a Sex Addict by Paulina Pantyleva is a book about one woman's journey in dealing with her addictions. However, I feel like Paulina is not qualified to do this. This is shown in chapter 24 and multiple times thereafter when she says she is "cured of sex addiction," "declared myself free from sex addiction," and other sentiments that anyone that has an addiction knows is very dangerous territory. Her "mindset coach" Dana Lee Chapman is likely the reason for this, but it doesn't make her any less responsible. Speaking of, the book reads like it's a huge ad for mindset coaching - to the point of comparing it equally to a licensed [trauma] therapist. As a woman that has been in therapy for almost two years to understand how all of the traumas I experienced caused my diagnosed CPTSD, OCD, and anxiety, as well as how I'm affected by everything still because it will goes away, to say that you just need to change your mindset is a disgusting oversimplification and completely irresponsible. Then, for her to say it's God's will, while also saying she's not religious, is shocking. I was just uncomfortable listening and wanted to be done.

Paulina is also very judgmental and shames others that aren't her standard of "normal". I was honestly shocked to know that she is a pediatrician. Not because of her addiction, but because of how her attitudes and outward persona are so off-putting. The questions that are asked at the end of most chapters don't really add anything as intended, but rather take away from her story.

Paulina Pantyleva is okay as a narrator. I tried to be understanding because I know she is not a professional. However, parts of the audio were disjointed, and the background noise is horribly irritating. Any money saved in production is not worth it for the listener.

I rate My Secret Life as a Sex Addict 1.5 stars rounded up to 2. Honestly, I wanted to rate it 1 star, but I'm trying to be respectful of her journey regardless of my thoughts and feelings about it.

Thank you to Paulina Pantyleva for providing me with an ALC.

Well this was definitely not what I expected but it was eyeopening, informative, and inspired. Following this courageous woman on her journey was inspirational to say the least. The ending where she shares her spiritual perspective was on point and I 100% agree. Thank you for putting this out there.

This is a super short read, easy to digest, pleasantly narrated.

The book title and description drew me in, both a curiosity about female sex addiction and the shocking little snippet shared about the cruise ship guy had me hitting download quickly. There were certainly some jaw dropping (no pun intended...) anecdotes shared, and the writing quality was good.

The story itself felt rushed to me and the stories casually sprinkled within it felt really detached, emotionally. I was also surprised there wasn't more depth to the actual healing part. Some of the data points shared were questionable and lacked supporting sources. At the end of the day, I'm not convinced this will actually help anyone seeking freedom from this addiction.

I'd give 2.5 stars but since Net Galley doesn't do half stars, rounding up to 3.

I received a copy of the audiobook by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

Even if the quality of the recording is far from professional, there is a rawness and intimacy in hearing the author narrate her own book, hearing hesitations in words, objects falling on the desk, and pauses after particularly emotional moments.

This is a rare kind of book. A book where someone decides to share the reality of living with an addiction, just like a shadow following you everywhere and taking control of your brain. She calls the sex addition a fantasy addition, and explains how often it is paired with eating disorder. Her mindset coach, who helped her find new ways to cope with her life and heal from her addictions, wrote the preface and the final conclusion of the book.

There is something about finding mirrors, something about finding raw self-published testimonies that reveal parts of yourself and help you heal. This is one of these books. I recommend it highly.

I have always been curious as to how and why for sex addicts. Trying to understand someone close to me I guess like a lot of people who pick up this book.
Thank you for writing this book to help other people understand.
The audio was quite poor but the narrators obviously were good as they were the ones living this story.