This is the second book I have read recently about women who commit violence, and Motz takes on the more difficult of the two arguments. The other book--The Furies by Elizabeth Flock--looks at women who commit violence when systems (like the police, courts, etc.) fail them. If Love Could Kill follows the cases of women who have committed arson, child abuse, assault, and many other crimes without such straightforward motives. But Motz argues that they too deserve our care and compassion, because these women have often been abused and suffered unimaginable difficulties that shaped them into the people they are. And, no matter what they have done, they are still our fellow human beings and deserve to be treated as such rather than dehumanized as is often their fate in prisons and psychiatric institutions. This was an often difficult and graphic book to read, but one that left me with a well of compassion for those who are often the most reviled or disregarded in our society.

This was such an interesting book. I think feminists or anyone interested in true crime would love this, it’s very unique and shares stuff I wouldn’t have expected.

An absolutely fascinating look at the violence women face and commit. It was eye opening to learn in more depth about the relationship between being a victim and perpetrator of violence. Additionally, the hope for the recovery of these women was highlighted throughout.

Definitely a trigger warning for sexual, physical, psychological, and child abuse. However, for anyone interested in psychology, especially of violent women, this is a must read.

Thanks to Netgalley for the opportunity to read this incredible, gut-wrenching, and inspiring book.

Thank you to Netgalley for the ARC. This was such an interesting read and I loved the point of view of a professional in the field on such a topic. The book made me learn much more facts about women serial killers that I did not know. Really good source of knowledge.

Engaging and accessible. A recommended purchase for collections where true crime and psychology titles are popular.

If you’re interested in psychology, this is a book you should read. I’m not particularly interested in the field, but I am interested in the criminal “justice” system and how people end up there.

I’m not quite sure why this was titled If Love Could Kill. This was about violent women and how they got that way, and it usually began with NOT being loved or cared for as children. A very common theme was sexual abuse when they were young by someone who should have been caring for them—a father, stepfather, uncle, or cousin. Often they didn’t tell anyone because of shame or the abuser would threaten them with killing them or family members. But if they were brave enough to tell someone and then weren’t believed, this compounded the feeling that there was no one looking out for them. In this book it’s a mother or other person in charge, but I think of all the cops over the years not doing anything with rape kits and screaming at victims that they were lying.

Motz worked in the U.K. for many years, and she hides the identity of her patients. While she does mention a few names that might ring a bell to Americans (Susan Smith), that’s not the focus of this book. Instead, each chapter focuses on a woman and what made her end up in Motz’s office. Motz worked at prisons for much of her career as a forensic psychotherapist, so these women might have gotten to her before going to court to see if they could retain custody of their children and so on.

Another common theme was that these women, who did not have good parenting to have a guide to follow, would get pregnant and might initially feel like now they’d have someone to love and would love them back at long last, but then often felt instead like an alien was taking over their body and then would get mired in postpartum depression, having no one to help with the day-to-day demands of a child who needed constant attention. These women were already battling PTSD, depression, and other mental issues, and now a child was endangered (lots of these women were self-harming—I learned a lot about that in this book—and/or already physically harming others). I wish the forced birthers cared at all about women and how not all women should be forced to go through the pain and other potential serious issues of pregnancy, both physical and mental. Also, these women’s partners sometimes became abusive for the first time during late-stage pregnancy, making the woman feel trapped to stick with a man who battered her.

There was a chapter on a woman who sexually abused children, and I didn’t think I’d be able to get through it, but I’m glad I did. I think of myself as someone who doesn’t give in to the myths of motherhood and intrinsic maternal instincts, but this chapter made me realize I do still cling to certain myths of what it means to be a woman.

NetGalley provided an advance copy of this nonfiction book, which RELEASES FEBRUARY 6, 2024.

I found this book so interesting. It is written by Anna Motz, who is an acclaimed forensic and clinical psychologist in London and also in NYC. Each chapter describes a new case, a different woman, who Dr. Motz has had in therapy; each with different types of problems/situations and violence that brought them to her. All of her patients are involved in some type of violence, in different ways, and Dr. Motz works on how that violence, their upbringing, and adulthood have affected their personalities and their current lives. Each story was so interesting to read while Dr. Motz examines their involvement in multiple forms of female violence, and how the circumstances of their lives as victims of multiple different crimes usually involving living situations while young, led them to being involved in a violent situation. The patients have committed some unbelievably violent acts against children (possibly their own child), their parents, their family or partners, or community members that they have come in contact with. Dr. Motz is able to humanize each victim no matter how violent their crime. She can't rehabilitate everyone she sees, but she definitely tries her best to teach them that they are valuable to themselves, their families and to society, and everything is not hopeless. It takes a lot of work to get there for many of these women. I enjoyed reading each of Dr. Motz's cases and learning about each case. Thank you to NG for the ARC! I definitely recommend this book to anyone interested in violence and forensic psychology.

Written by a forensic psychotherapist, “If Love Could Kill” is about some of the author’s female patients who have committed egregious crimes and/or inflicted violence, even to children. Anna Motz explores the reasons behind the criminality and whether or not these women can survive outside of institutions in their future.

We, as a culture, tend to believe that violence is caused only by psychopaths or sociopaths, but often these acts of violence are due to one’s upbringing or even based on a mode of self preservation. Ms. Motz draws on her expertise to engage in a meaningful way with her patients and often breaks through to the good person inside each of them.

The story of each woman is unique, compelling and thought-provoking. We need more psychotherapists, doctors and other medical personnel to take an interest in this field of work and bring it to the forefront of forensics. Excellent book. I highly recommend this along with a trigger warning of violence, child abuse and sexual abuse.

Thank you, NetGalley and Knopf, Pantheon, Vintage and Anchor for the advanced copy.