Generally an entertaining novel, with lots of important and thoughtful sentiments explored and valued. Crosley anecdotally and curiously unpacks one of the hardest years of her life in an incredibly enthralling fashion that had me quite entertained and drawn in until the very end.

Sloane Crosley has turned two, seemingly unrelated but life-changing events—a targeted home burglary and the suicide of a dear friend—into a moving treatise on love and loss. I was gripped by the complex feelings that the story of her first loss, of her not especially beloved grandmother's valuable jewelry, inspired in me. Crosley truly mourns the theft, (and I am 100% on board) though she is told that "grief is reserved for people, not things". This was a violation on many levels, and Crosley's exploration of the incident and its aftermath is truly compelling. The loss of her dear friend and former boss eclipses this event, of course, but again puts her in a grieving gray area, that of the close friend who felt like family, but is not. Crosley digs deep here, soul searching and literal searching, and her story, despite its overwhelming grief, still allows space for her wit and intelligence to shine.

It took me a few days to read this one because parts of it affected me deeply. I enjoyed how this is not just about grief, but also about loss; and how in Crossley's case two events coincided that made her have to deal with these losses concurrently and as a result, maybe even more deeply.

I want to write more about it, but it would be too personal and go into spoiler territory.

~ ARC provided through NetGalley ~

I was given an eBook version of "Grief is for People," but I knew within the first twenty pages that I needed my own hard copy. I had never read Sloane Crosley's work before, but I was familiar with her last novel, "Cult Classic." I knew nothing about "Grief" besides the fact that it was a memoir, and it took me by surprise. In this work, Crosley explores the never-ending journey of grief from what felt like a new vantage point. I feel like most readers are familiar with non-fiction that explores the death of a parent, a child, or even a romantic partner (Crosley herself mentions Joan Didion's "Year of Magical Thinking" multiple times). What I found most interesting was the vantage point Crosley inhabits, as a friend of someone who took their own life. Maybe it's because I've personally navigated this less coveted version of grief before multiple times, but I felt like ever note and theme of this book struck a chord with me. This book is incredibly dark, very sad, and hard to explain, but for me, it helped me sort through a lot of feelings that I've had about my proximity to death and grief in a way I've never done before over a work of art. So far, one of my favorite reads of 2024.

I love Sloane Crosley and I love the way she can imbue any topic with a dash of humor. Grief is for People was no exception, navigating a burglary that left her deeply unsettled, followed by the loss of her best friend in a manner that was both a little silly and deeply reflective. I felt more connected through the beginning as she rummaged through her experience of living through both of those events; the end meandered into musings on New York during the pandemic that I was less interested in but were still (characteristically) well-written.

This is not necessarily a rec because of similarity in writing style, but another author who I believe did a good job on the subject of grief is Kathryn Schulz, in Lost & Found.

Thank you to FSG for offering the opportunity to read and review!

“Following the death of her closest friend, Sloane Crosley explores multiple kinds of loss in this disarmingly witty and poignant memoir.“

Years ago I had a friend who lost a child. She and her husband took their daughter home from the hospital, spending time alone with her one last time. I might not make the same choices as my friend, but as someone whose children are all still living, I refuse to judge a mom who doesn’t.

I feel similar after reading this book. What with its honest vulnerability and tender subject matter, I will not be assigning a star-value to her words. I vibe with some. Some, not-so-much. What I can, fully, attest to, is the author’s powerful command of language. Her writing is raw, lyrical, surgical.

If you’ve lost someone to suicide, be gentle with yourself.
If you haven’t, be gentle with the author.

Thanks to NetGalley and Farrar, Straus and Giroux for this weighty ARC.

I was given an advance copy of this book by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I don’t know how Sloane Crosley does it. She takes this subject matter that is SO grim—the suicide of her best friend, and her grief—and turns it into a reading experience that genuinely plumbs the depths of her feelings but is somehow NOT grim. It’s actually rather comforting to move through her feelings with her, especially if you have also lost someone you love.

In the I Was Told There’d Be Cake days, I kind of thought of Sloane Crosley as a glib, skimming-the-surface writer who sacrificed real, difficult feelings for cleverness and quirkiness, but either I underestimated her, or she has honed her skill so sharply over the course of her writing career that she can now tackle this thorniest of personal experiences in such a way that her wit only adds more nuance to the exploration.

Loss is universal. Grief is universal. I don't think anyone writes more eloquently about those shared experiences than Sloane Crosley. With her ever present wit and wry, Sloane dives deep into her own personal losses of being burglarized and losing her dear friend to suicide within a short span of time. She also touches on the pandemic and what an odd sphere of time and loss that was for us collectively. Such a touching read like only Sloane can carry out.

An incredibly beautiful, poignant, and raw book from an author whose writing I adore. Crosley writes about the seemingly endless process of grief - tying in an unexpected robbery of her precious family jewelry with the unexpected violent death of one of her closest friends just one month later. She talks about her devastation, frustration, denial, anger, despair, and all of the confusing emotions that accompany the death of a loved one. I felt like I knew Russell intimately and could feel the love Sloane felt for him in these pages.

"Maybe I can put my pain in a cabinet. But the drawers keep popping open. The grief does not cotton to being squished. It takes the form of painful blooms in the chest that require attention, often in public. I stop in the street, putting my hand over my heart like l've just remembered something. Or else I sit on planes with tears streaming down my face."

I don’t know that it’s right to say that reading a book largely about suicide and the conscious act of processing trauma and grief was “lovely.” But this book was truly so lovely in such a painful and cathartic and difficult way that really humanized the experience. I love how deeply philosophical this book is, how it’s more interested in pulling at threads and making you think than it is with providing tidy answers about grief with a bow on top. I also loved the way that, though it’s a work of nonfiction, it finds ways to be creative with timelines and perspective shifts to keep things engaging. I just wish I could have read it physically the entire time- when I listened to it on audio vs reading it physically, I didn’t retain as much and felt a little lost and swept away in its ebbs and flows.

Sloane Crosley is truly such a spectacular talent; this was my first time reading her work and I’m really looking forward to moving through her backlist and reading more from her in the future.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a digital ARC in exchange for an honest review! I also listened to the audio version of this book through my personal Everand subscription.

This would be an excellent book club selection. It's a personal story but it's also about the grief Sloane feels about have both her jewelry and her dear friend taken from her. This book has stayed with me, even after I read it. Highly recommend!

this book had two of my favorite things (honest writing; sloane crosley) and two of my least favorite things (writing about the pandemic; writing about new york as if it's the center of the world). but the first two certainly made up for the latter. i mourned russell alongside sloane, wondering HOW and WHY and wishing this gorgeous friendship could have lasted far longer. the middle sections can feel confusing and overwritten, but that only adds to the feeling of total discombobulation at this loss. i can't imagine how hard this book was to write.

An absolutely beautiful, dark, funny memoir on grief and the way it somehow dances its way into everything.

Only Sloane Crosby could be so funny and so heartbreaking all at once.

A terrific book about grief - her experience of losing her close friend of 20 years to suicide - but also about New York and found family and friendship in general.

This felt intensely personal, and yet I’m grateful we as readers have been given access to these memories and moments, and in particular an intimate look at the grieving process.

The last chapters honestly - I was bawling. Just beautiful. You WILL be moved, read with tissues. A wonderful book.

Apologies that this review is coming so late! Thank you for the opportunity to read this book's incredible galley.

-- REVIEW --
Devastating but also really funny. It's one of those books that uses humor to hide the pain underneath Crosley's words. I think this exists as the perfect eulogy for her friend, and it truly felt like I, too, had gotten to befriend Russell through Crosley's impactful words.

Absolutely stunning!

It feels so odd to review someone's deeply personal account of grief.

We all experience grief differently and here Crosley chronicles hers after losing her best friend who died by suicide. Her humor and wit seep into the cracks of her pain that she has carefully put on display for her readers. How hard it must be to live through such a loss and then write a memoir surrounding it. But she has done so beautifully. I finished this book several days ago and it has really stuck with me.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.

such an intense, important and insightful little book about grief. packs a punch, will make you laugh n cry. maybe all at once.

thanks netgalley and FSG for the arc <3

Thanks, Farrar, Straus and Giroux, MCD, for the early review copy via NetGalley.

I’m not alone in hearing the siren’s call of grief books. @inthecommonhours recently (9 Feb) shared a heartfelt and comprehensive wrap-up of some of the best ones. Enter a new book to join the ranks of Joan Didion, Catherine Newman, and Emma Grey: Crosley’s memoir about the loss of her best friend.

“After the pain and confusion of losing her closest friend to suicide, Crosley looks for answers in friends, philosophy, and art, hoping for a framework more useful than the unavoidable stages of grief.” (GoodReads)

Crosley is an incredibly gifted writer: clever, witty, and able to capture exactly how grief feels using her own experience. In a 193-page book, I highlighted 61 passages! I loved it so much that I’ve procrastinated writing my review for weeks. What could I say that could possibly capture this perfection? Nothing. Instead, I offer her own words so you can see for yourself. (Note: these quotes are from an uncorrected digital galley and may differ slightly in the published copy.)

“You can ignore grief. You push it around your plate. But you can’t give it away.”

“To watch them interact was to watch someone pet a cat’s fur in the wrong direction— you know it won’t end well, you just don’t know when.”

“...tsunami of wallowing…”

“My initial grief, which I thought might be taking a manageable shape, has mutated. It’s colonized my entire personality…The missing is so constant, even I am surprised by it.”

“He is my favorite person, the one who somehow sees me both as I want to be seen and as I actually am,”

This book goes through the author’s experience of loss — both of a friend and of family items in a home invasion. I thought it was interesting in that regard since so much on loss is only focused on losing people or sometimes pets, when it can be so much more. It started a little surface level in some regards in the beginning but I’m glad I stuck with it. I liked how the book built throughout, weaving interesting nuances to show the waves of grief and build our understanding of the complexities and depth of their relationship.

Sloane Crosley has a way with words. No doubt about it. I will read more from her--can't believe I haven't. This book is good--but there is a Loy of grief talk, especially around suicide. A loved one of mine died by suicide, so a lot of this was hard for me to read. Just know your self as a reader. This has been a year of well written memoirs, and while this sin't a true memoir, more about a certain period in her life, it was well done. I recommend.