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I really enjoyed this book! Dear Wendy and Dear Wanda are two anonymous advice accounts that have been "fighting" with each other over the internet. Meanwhile, in real life, the two owners of the account, Sophie and Jo, are becoming closer with each other, bonding over being aroace. I really enjoyed this book!
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Dear Wendy,
I randomly picked this galley from my Kindle and I was so absorbed I ended up finishing the entire book in one night.
This book is a heartfelt novel dedicated by the author to the aromantics, asexuals, and aro-aces that is perfect for fans of Sex Education and Perfect on Paper.
DW revolves on story of two aro-ace teens who started a secret relationship advice account in Instagram for Wellesby students. Both Sophie and Jo started their own account to fully express themselves and help their fellow students in whatever situation they are in. The twist is Sophie and Jo became friends in their gender class but they did not know that they are the ones handling the Dear Wanda and Dear Wendy IG accounts respectively.
What I liked the most about DW is how insightful this one is especially in giving information and sharing experiences from the perspective of aromantic, asexual, and aro-ace characters.
Both Sophie and Jo identify as aro-aces and throughout the novel, they found comfort knowing that they have each other to lean on and discuss about their experiences being aro-aces in Wellesby.
I also liked the relationship advice aspect of the book and as a big fan of the Netflix series Sex Education and Sophie Gonzales' Perfect on Paper, I enjoyed reading about the Dear Wendy and Dear Wanda entries that were scattered all throughout the book.
There are also content warnings that may trigger some readers especially the parts about homophobia, identity erasure, and bullying.
Overall, a great YA debut that will be added soon in the ever-growing queer books repertoire. 4stars
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4.5 stars
Thank you so much to Netgalley and Feiwel and Friends for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
I’m so grateful I got the chance to read and review this book early. As someone who’s aroace, media that represents us is very few and far between. And GOOD media is even fewer. Which is why I’m so glad this book exists for the young aroaces out there still figuring themselves out.
I loved the dual POV. I loved the characters. I loved the plot. (I am definitely a Wanda, considering I’m manually typing the caps for this since I have autocap off on my phone.) I love the portrayal of their being something other than simply friends or simply dating. That you can love someone, be /in/ love with someone, without that love having to be romantic.
As someone with immigrant parents, it was also very healing for me to see Sophie go through the phases of accepting how her parents view her sexuality. I think there’s so much media where parents are either entirely accepting or entirely unaccepting, but not much about parents who are in the middle, especially due to cultural differences between our home countries and the U.S.
All in all, I really loved this book (though I gotta dock that half a star for all the Taylor Swift refs, soz to the Swifties but her silence has been deafening.) I’m so glad we’re getting more books about aroace folks out there and I hope this will lead to more stories about aroace people being picked up in the future! Please check it out when it comes out April 16th!
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So this 3-star rating comes with some caveats, namely: I'm glad this book exists. As an aroace sapphic, I think there should be no shortage of representation, and I'm particularly glad this exists for teen audiences.
I'll start off with the things I did like:
- The Instagram feud
- The development of Jo and Sophie's friendship
- The framing of that friendship as a type of love story
- The setting was interesting and worked well for the story
Now, here are the things that didn't work for me. These aren't necessarily things I think need to be changed and they aren't inherently bad things, they just aren't a style I'm particularly interested in.
- Because this is an a-spec story, the plot structure and storylines were quite different from other things I've read. In some ways this was interesting to see play out, but overall I think in this case it made it so the stakes were too low and when conflict did come up it just felt kind of...silly? With this type of story structure, character becomes increasingly important and even though I liked the characters and their developing relationships, I still felt like there was something missing there.
- This book contains a lot of conversations between characters pertaining to a-spec identity. This will probably be a great thing for young readers and those unfamiliar with these terms, but as an a-spec person who's been on Tumblr since 2016 those conversations were kinda old potatoes. I'm sure those conversations will help lots of people, they just didn't hit for me.
- The plethora of pop culture references did get old after a while. I know it's to be expected in contemporary YA at this point, but it was just a little too much for me.
Anyway, don't let my 3 star rating deter you from reading this. It didn't fully work for me but there was still lots to love and I'm sure this book will help lots of people. Anyone who likes lighthearted stories about friendship will probably enjoy this, and I'll be interested to read Zhao's future work.
Thank you, NetGalley, for a digital ARC in exchange for an honest review.
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I! Love! Books! About! Friendship!
Dear Wendy by Ann Zhao is a heartfelt coming-of-age story that follows Jo (she/her) and Sophie (she/they), two first-year students at Wellesley College who start dueling anonymous advice columns–at the same time they're befriending each other in real life, unaware of the other's online identity. It's kind of like a new spin on the old You've-Got-Mail trope, except that there's no romance in this version because Jo and Sophie are both aroace and a lot of their budding friendship is based on the the relief of finally having someone who understands the nuances of that identity. I think this is a book that's going to make people feel very, very seen, from the discussions of what it means to realize you're aroace in a world where ideas of happiness and success are often tied to the belief that you need a long-term romantic partner to the discussions of what it means to be a queer person of color/the child of immigrants (Sophie is Chinese American and a lot of the other characters are queer people of color).
It's also a very readable, engaging story. Jo and Sophie are very likable characters that also balance each other out as co-protagonists–Jo as an ambitious, type-A college student and Jo is more laid-back and yet still struggles with accepting her identity. I really appreciated the heartfelt and complex way this story explores different kinds of love, especially familial and platonic relationships. This book is about advice columns that often dispense love advice, but the story itself is also a love letter to finding community and friendship that truly understand and support you. I basically read this book in one sitting (while on a roadtrip) and I think others will be similarly sucked into the story, finding the characters appealing and the explorations of identity and platonic love honest and heartwarming. (I have to say, though, as someone who recently graduated from a different American liberal arts college with a robust student radio program, Jo has such basic taste as a DJ! Sorry, Jo, but it's true...)
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4 stars.
Thank you to Netgalley and Feiwel and Friends for providing me with an e-arc in exchange for an honest review!
I have been anticipating this ever since I saw Ann Zhao's book deal announcement. I don't think I have ever read a novel with an aroace main character, let alone one that had two main characters who were aromantic and asexual. I was really excited to see a story centered around friendship and how important and life-changing they can be. I was also looking forward to seeing a book set in university following protagonists who were finding themselves.
This was such a quick and sweet book. I really liked how different Sophie and Jo are, despite both of them being aroace. Even their relationships with their sexualities defers from each other, showing that there isn't one type of experience. I also liked seeing how different the leads' home lives are. Sophie's relationship with her parents is completely different than Jo's, and it explains a lot about the characters' personalities and struggles. I really loved that while Sophie couldn't go to her parents with a lot of her problems and worries, she was able to reach out to her professor and have a space where she feels heard by an adult. I also liked Sophie and Jo's roommates and the friendships they had with them. I do wish there were more moments of the friend group intertwined, but I liked the interactions that they did have. I believe that the final chapters are the strongest of the book. That is when the platonic love between Sophie and Jo seemed the strongest and their bond the closest. I found it so endearing how many "romantic tropes" were used in their entirely platonic relationship.
I do feel like Jo had more of an blatant arc and changed in a more obvious way, compared to Sophie. That's not a bad thing, considering Sophie is a very internal character when it comes to her struggles, but I do wish we got to delve in her head a little deeper. I also feel that the writing had moments of being a little distant and doing more telling than showing, despite the chapters being first person. That said, this was so clearly written with love and to bring comfort to other a-spec people, especially those who feel lost or unsure about what their lives will look like. All in all, I think Ann Zhao achieved what she set out to do with this book.
I had a nice time with this book and the last few chapters truly brought a smile to my face and made my heart flutter. Seeing the development is Sophie and Jo's friendship was so beautiful. It makes me very happy that so many a-spec people, but especially a-spec teens, will have this story and be able to see themselves in it, as well as a future for themselves.
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So I'm not sure of I'm aro/ace exactly or somewhere else on the spectrum there but this book definitely hit close to home for me. It's definitely one I think could help others who are struggling to find where they fit on that spectrum or just make people feel more seen.
This is a really good book overall. It was sweet and fun and I really enjoyed the characters. I've seen this idea done a couple times before but never with aro/ace characters and I really liked that aspect of the story. I liked watching the characters bond and a romance not being the end game. Overall this is a really solid book and I definitely recommend it!
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Aroace representation is having its moment and I couldn’t be happier. Following in the steps of Alice Oseman, Ann Zhao makes a lovely debut with this casual story of two college students feuding online and finding friendship in real life. This story feels true to today’s teens and young adults who navigate the world through different platforms. I am eager to see what else Zhao has to offer as an author!
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This is such an earnest, lovely little book. You can feel how much the author cares about this book and about having representation on the page, while also having a genuinely delightful writing style that never feels inaccessible to young voices. Highly recommend.
An asexual/aromantic story for everyone who wanted all the vibes of a YA romance but for an ace-spec audience. The author's love of writing this book pours out of every page, and creates a charming, endearing experience. Would send this to young adults questioning their aromantic and asexual identities, as well as just anyone else who wants a lovely, fun time.
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Dear Wendy is perfect for fans of books like Loveless. If enjoy books with queer representation set at a college then you will absolutely want to pick up this book. I really loved the journey the two main characters took as well as the side plots. The different characters stories combining was pretty fun and I just really liked the overall message of this book. A great new YA book you will want to pick up when it is released.
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I'm not the target age range for this, and yet I've never felt more seen. As someone a-spec who's inching towards 30, this is the first time I've come across a novel that I feel, uh, gets me. Friendship trauma of being dumped for a romantic partner? Navigating feeling unwanted and unloveable? I laughed but mostly cried my way through this story. Sophie and Jo are the perfect dual POVs. An odd couple, comedy of errors type of story set against the ultra-modern, on trend issue of social media and its many pitfalls. Loved, loved, loved this. Hope it helps some queer kids who are trying to figure things out. A perfect first read for 2024.
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This book was everything. I can not and will not get over this anytime soon.
The aro/ace rep in this book was SO much better than I could have imagined. The amount of times I put this book down just to pause for a moment with how relatable something was.
The author did such an incredible job at describing what it’s like to be asexual. The feeling of loneliness that being asexual (or anything under the aro/ace umbrella) can bring was written so well. Knowing you don’t want a romantic relationship but feeling left behind or feeling pressured from family and/or society to be “normal” and find a significant other. Seeing friends get into relationships and lose interest in you. It was painfully relatable as someone under the umbrella terms of asexuality.
Sophie and Jo had such good rivals to platonic lovers’ vibes. Getting closer in person, finding someone who they could talk to about being aro/ace and quickly becoming best friends all the while online, on secret accounts being annoyed by the other.
This book was so refreshing to read. It was so queer and I just know it will help out anyone struggling with weather or not their ace or aro or anything along those terms.
Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ (5/5)
Release Date: 16, April 2024
POV: Switching, First Person
Rep: Aro/Ace (MCs), Chinese (MC), Lesbian (SC), Bisexual (SC), LGBTQIA+ Characters, BIPOC (SCs)
⚠️ Content Warnings:
Moderate: Acephobia/Arophobia
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Dear Wendy is a fun, modern take on a You've Got Mail storyline. Two students are both running rival advice accounts at their liberal arts college, while not knowing that they've struck a friendship within their women and gender studies class. Told through alternating perspectives, the reader waits to see when they will both figure it out, and how they will react. This was a fun read. I love books set in college, especially liberal arts college and that focus on social science, so this was perfect for me. I also liked the focus on friendship, which stood out to me as different and needed within the genre.
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I loved the relationship between the characters and also this book helped me understand some of my friends who are coming out as asexual because I sometimes don't even know or understand what that means for them.
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Thank you Feiwel and Friends for the digital ARC!
DEAR WENDY is a charming platonic love story about being aroace in college. Sophie and Jo had great banter, and aroace teens will definitely relate to their feelings. Ann Zhao writes from a place of authenticity, with a bright, unique voice.
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This book is going to be my everything and I'm not even sorry. As someone under the ace umbrella, I loved the discussions Sophie and Jo had about whether or not allos actually like spicy scenes, aces enjoying romcoms, the overabundance of books about romantic relationships with not as many focusing on platonic ones, and the lingering question of do you ever truly know your identity? It all felt so real and validating and younger me absolutely needed this. This book is just casually queer book, and I absolutely love it. While there are some familial issues with homophobia or compulsory heterosexuality, Jo and Sophie are surrounded by a queer community of classmates, upperclassmen, and professors. I also love how there is an actual instagram account for both of them (yes I checked lol) and I'm curious to see if they'll be active when we get closer to the pub date. All in all, I absolutely loved this one and can't wait to see Dear Wendy become a part of the YA Ace canon.
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I had so much fun with Dear Wendy! It's a low stakes comedy about two people navigating what it is like to be aroace in their university setting, navigating friendships and the fear of being left out and the awkwardness of making friends in college
There is a lot of complexity with the characters and it dives deep into their identities, not only as queer people but discusses gender and ethnicity as well as expectations from immigrant parents.
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The feud between our two main asexual characters created such a fun dynamic from the start. It was nice to see a not so typical kind of love story with fresh social media features throughout. The characters were well defined and immediately made me happy to read about. I look forward to more from this author!
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Dear Wendy was, well, I don’t even know what to say. It was exactly what I wanted and everything I needed at the exact same time.
I will admit, going into it, I was worried I had hyped it so much in my head that the actual book would disappoint. (I preordered this book in April 2022, for gods sake, before I even knew how the arc request process would work.) I am very, very happy to state that it didn’t. In fact, it surpassed my expectations entirely.
Ann Zhou’s portrayal of not /only/ aroace characters, but being a non-white and queer, meant the world to me. As an Asian-American, I have never fully seen myself in any of the aroace characters in media today (and there is a distinct lack of them). And yet, for the first time, I felt so incredibly seen not just because I am aroace, but because I am a person of color as well. We need more poc queer representation, more poc /aspec/ representation, and I’m very very glad that a book like Dear Wendy exists and that I (I!!!) had the opportunity to read it (early!).
I saw most of myself in Sophie Chi, as I myself fit into the “Wendy” label probably just a little bit too much—I think every academic asian-american with parental pressure will find the Wendy label somewhat relatable—But I saw parts of myself in Jo Ephron as well. Like Sophie, I’ve identified as aroace for roughly 5 years. Like Sophie, I am asian-american (specifically, singaporean with chinese heritage—my parents’ views on being aroace are like Sophie’s parents; they don’t believe it exists.) Like Sophie, I am, and always will be, in love with college a little “too much”. (Like Sophie, I work for my school’s newspaper, I have a little sister, I love Taylor Swift and Carly Rae Jepsen, I love gossip, etc. etc. etc.) But like Jo, I go to a college in my state. I live half an hour away from my parents, and go home every weekend. Like Jo, I worry immensely about being lonely in the future (I worry about everyone hating me). Like Jo, I have always felt somewhat alone, even though I have friends who care about me.
There was numerous parts throughout the book where I felt like someone had reached into a part of my thoughts, feelings, who I am, and put it within the pages of this book. I don’t think I have ever felt this seen in my life. Following Sophie and Jo’s journey and seeing learn how to be comfortable with being wholly themselves, has made me want to achieve that. And I think, because of this book, I am one step closer to accepting myself for who I am.
(Five stars. Could it be anything less?)
Thank you to Netgalley, Feiwei and Friends, (even though yall rejected my original request), and Ann Zhou for the opportunity to read this early! This review is my honest opinion and I was not paid to do it. Preorder Dear, Wendy which is out April 16th, 2024!
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What a fun an exciting novel following in the steps of Loveless! The setting of the college is well-realized and detailed (despite occasionally feeling like an ad) and the main characters have unique and engaging voices and perspectives. Although side characters can occasionally feel same-y at the beginning, they flesh out well by the end.