Ruying has lived her entire life under the occupation of the Romans who invaded her world over 20 years ago. The people of Ruying’s world are sometimes born with special abilities, such as super human strength or healing. Ruying discovered her ability to essentially rip the life out of people, meaning she has dominion over death magic. Her magic catches the attention of the princes of Rome, who kidnap her in the middle of the night. Ruying then must bargain with one of the princes to keep her family safe. As she becomes an assassin for the Romans, Ruying finds herself drawn to the prince, yet with the constant threat of war and rebellion, she must pick a side.

To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods faced some controversy as I was reading and writing up this review. As a white person, I don’t really have the ability to say whether or not this was a proper colonizer romance, but according to reviewers that read this, they have described it as such. Please look into the triggers and reviews from readers of color before delving into this. In my opinion, however, is that the book is marketed poorly. I didn’t necessarily find that the romance was enemies to lovers as initially marketed. I also never felt sympathy towards Antony, the colonizer, and actually hated him and his kingdom throughout the entire book. I saw Ruying’s attraction to him as a desperate way to keep herself sane whilst committing atrocities, and while reading I always kept Antony at arm’s length. I didn’t trust him; he was incredibly manipulative, cruel, and selfish. Sure, towards the end it appears Antony beings to develop serious feelings for Ruying, but when Ruying discovers the extent of his war crimes, she promptly begins working toward assisting the rebellion. I don’t think the romance ever developed past initial attraction, and I believe we see this with Ruying’s quick betrayal. This book is a heavy read in terms of how triggering it can be. The author took inspiration from her family’s experience with Unit 731, and the effect on the story was gut wrenching. We all know humans are capable of horrendous things, but these atrocities are of their own category. As someone who is not directly or indirectly effected by Unit 731, I cannot speak on if using it as inspiration was wrong - but many people who have been effected have spoken out about how they don’t condone the author using it in her book. I think To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods is a decent fantasy debut and I will most likely keep reading the series, but please make sure to do your research before reading it.

Thank you to Del Rey and Molly X. Chang for sending me an early copy, I’m leaving this review voluntarily.

I want to start out by saying that I really wanted to love this. I loved the author’s note at the beginning and how she tied in stories that her grandfather would tell her into the story and world she created. However, I had a hard time getting through the book which was incredibly disappointing. It felt like every other sentence was a metaphor or some sort of introspection and that as readers, we were more stuck in Ruying’s inner monologue instead of her story. I felt like her motivations weren’t truly driving her actions. The worldbuilding was confusing and not well fleshed out, and there was so much repetition that it felt like Chang had little trust in her readers to pick up on what was important. I love a good morally grey character and romance, but I could not find it in me to root for Ruying and Antony. Because of the marketing of this book, I did think I was part of the target audience and was left feeling very underwhelmed by this story.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book! I know there are some valid criticisms about this being a "colonizer romance" but I didn't think the romance was portrayed in a way that was positive. Like Ruying, I was conflicted on which side was the right one. The author did a compelling job in creating high stakes for whichever side Ruying did pick.

One of the author’s strengths is the ability to write complex morally gray characters. Ruying is what I would describe as a reluctant hero. She wants to avoid using her gift to kill people, but is pushed to do so to protect her family, even if they do not understand. She has to question her morals because she doesn’t know if what she is doing is the right thing. Antony is also a complex character. He is the prince of the people who colonize her yet he is portrayed as someone who wants to avoid war at all cost. He is kind at times, but calculating which is why he was such a confusing character to root for.

In terms of world-building, I do hope it gets expanded on in the next book. I couldn’t tell if the Romans were supposed to be from our universe and they decided to colonize another one or are both of these countries completely fictional.

Overall, I had an enjoyable experience reading this book, it kept me hooked throughout the story. I do want to see how the series will conclude and what will happen to Ruying and Antony.

It’s always hard to review a book like this. To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods is a book mired in controversy; I can’t even post my review on Goodreads due to “unusual activity.” I’m going to be very careful in how I phrase my thoughts. As always, I’ve read this ARC in full and the opinions expressed below are my own.

I’m a fantasy girlie ™. It’s my most-read genre, my favorite genre, and the genre I turn to whenever I’m in the dregs of a reading slump. When you read a lot in one particular genre, you start to recognize its trappings. Specifically: young adult fantasy is simpler. The worldbuilding is less complex; the lore is minimal. Sometimes, this is basically fine. Other times, especially when the lore-building (or lack thereof) directly contributes to the strength of the conflict and character motivations, I find myself frustrated.

I’m bringing this up because I’m honestly not sure how to classify this one. Who is the intended audience here? Is this a book meant for adults or teenagers? On Netgalley, I can still see it categorized as “General Fiction (Adult).” Goodreads and Storygraph both list it as “Young Adult.” I’m inclined to believe this was meant to be adult and it’s now being marketed as YA in response to early reviewer feedback. See also: early press, which emphasized the “enemies to lovers” romance, has scaled back on that dramatically. 

Speaking of that romance — oof. I’m going to keep my comments short. Other reviewers have addressed this in depth. Whether or not it changes in future installments (Chang is contracted for a trilogy), book one, the book I’m reviewing here, is a romance. The way Ruying describes Antony is romantic. The way Antony describes Ruying in his POV chapter is romantic. I want to emphasize how important it is to check out BIPOC reviews, such as the ones I’ve linked above, for more on the “colonizer romance” trope, how it appears in this book, and why it’s harmful. The marketing may have switched to emphasizing Baihu as Ruying’s childhood friend-to-lover, but it’s right there in the description: “Can Ruying trust this prince, whose promises of a better world make her heart ache and whose smiles make her pulse beat faster?” Girl, stand up!

Aside from the romance, my biggest problem with Wicked Gods was the worldbuilding. Or, er, lack thereof. It took me nearly half the book to realize that the “Romans” were from a different world than Pangu. Ruying describes a “portal in the sky” which is somehow a portal to our Earth. How this portal appeared, and when, and why these “Romans” are in charge (or are they?) was unclear. We know from Antony that Earth is ravaged by pollution and climate crises, but whether this is actually true or he’s just lying to manipulate Ruying is fuzzy. There’s some potentially interesting stuff here about climate change and the disproportionate impact on the Global South, but it gets lost in the muddled conflict of “magic versus science” that dominates the book.

This is a book full of capital-C Choices. The “resistance” is led by a masked man called “The Phantom.” His followers wear iron opera masks. Antony mentions Caesar Augustus, Jupiter, etc., making it clear that these Romans are somehow related to Ancient Rome, but the hallucinogenic drug circulating in Pangu is “opian”, not opium, for reasons that aren’t completely clear to me. Ruying wields death magic, but the role of the pantheon of gods (those titular wicked gods) is muddled. At one point, Antony refers to the colonizing Romans as the “new gods” due to their superior mastery of science, and Ruying, despite being able to speak to Death, doesn’t disagree.

This is a book with problems. I don’t understand Ruying’s magic, I don’t understand the “magic versus science” conflict; I don’t understand the geopolitics; I don’t understand the geography. Despite all the infodumping in the first chapter, I don’t have any idea what’s going on. I’m not confident the author does either.

(Review will be posted April 8)

Not for me AT ALL. I feel like the author is trying just a bit too hard with trying to make things symbolic, that in the end it just becomes boring and almost like a chore to read. When reading, it felt like I actively had to read instead of just falling into the world and having fun with it. I don't want reading to feel like a chore or a job, and sadly this is what the book did to me. If this was a video game, you would be seeing me press the "skip text" option throughout the entirety of the game just so I can get it over with already. Books shouldn't make me want to skip pages upon pages of information and character interactions.

DNF @ 40%
I’m not the type of reader that will DNF a book but in this case I really just needed to put this down.
There were too many things going against TGUWG and not enough keeping me engaged.
To start, there was way too much info dumping. It took away from a plot with a lot of potential. I strongly believe that a truly good book embodies the “show don’t tell” in their writing.
The second thing that really bugged me was this odd use of Romans. I loved Pangu and their unique magic system. Pangu is virtually a fantastical version of Asia but then “Rome” seems like a modern day Earth. The use of “Rome” and “Romans” is very confusing since “Romans” brings the vision of the ancient Romans yet they have all the technological advances (and more) than modern day Earth. It just really took away from the story.
Thirdly, the storyline between Ruying and Antony is not the enemies to lovers that I was expecting. Antony may appear to have the right intentions but his actions and lack of empathy are truly appalling.
Overall, this book just really didn’t work for me. I think that it has a great premise but it was executed very poorly.
Thank you NetGalley for this eARC in exchange for an honest review

Ultimately DNFed this one. The writing style just wasn't for me. I could see other folks connecting with this deeply, but I hope the text got a lot of copyediting clean-up after what was shared in the eARC.

Thank you so much to the publisher and Netgalley for this arc.

I was excited to read this book because the premise sounded interesting and I always want to support debut authors. Now, this book has a lot of discourse surrounding it. I have decided to dnf this book for now. I am watching a lot of reviews and videos involving this book. So it has influenced my view of the book and I believe that some time away from the book will help me sort out my feelings.

I wanted to love this sooooo much. But there was just too much repetition and too many metaphors that it felt like it dragged the plot down. It could have been 1/3 as long and none of the plot would have been missed. It felt really like there were many plot holes and holes in the world building. The aspects of colonizer romance were also really quite gross. It felt like it just glossed over colonization of countries instead of examining or acknowledging that.

I understand the main character was doing bad things for a good reason but it just didn’t resonate. The motivations for her to do these things felt weak. If the main character had thought one layer beyond the surface at all it would not have made sense to do those things. And her behavior was very inconsistent.

“𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐚𝐳𝐞 𝐔𝐩𝐨𝐧 𝐖𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐆𝐨𝐝𝐬” 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰

★ ★ ★ ★ ☆

A Chinese inspired dark romantasy with death magic and enemies to lovers.

𝘉𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩, 𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘴, 𝘙𝘶𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘯 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴. 𝘌𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦.

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘙𝘶𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨’𝘴 𝘎𝘪𝘧𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘭: 𝘐𝘧 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘭𝘴—𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘧𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯—𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘳𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥, 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦.

Enemies to lovers, you say? Sign me up 😂 I really enjoyed this book! Part 1 started out a little slow for me but once it picked up I was hooked. Overall I’d say this was a strong start to a great new ya fantasy series I’m looking forward to continuing!

Thank you so much to @delreybooks for this #gifted review copy. All thoughts and opinions are my own. 𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐚𝐳𝐞 𝐔𝐩𝐨𝐧 𝐖𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐆𝐨𝐝𝐬 is out April 16, 2024!

Thank you to netgalley and Random House for the gifted e-ARC.

Hmmm. Okay so I didn’t necessarily enjoy this book, but I think it didn’t play into the colonizer romance as much as I’d expected. The writing style started out kind of clunky and melodramatic but improved as I went along, to the point where I felt immersed. I think the magical system, worldbuilding, and politics were interesting. However, the characters were the part that really just didn’t read true to me. Ruying was one of the main characters that I just couldn’t gel with. Like two pages in to the prince being vaguely nice to her and she’s completely lost her morals. I just didn’t buy the pivot, and found it really hard to like her strange balance of believing she was being self-sacrificing while sacrificing others? I just found her annoying and not very smart. And if there’s something I like in a character, it’s cleverness.

Overall, I think this book does a better job of managing Ruying’s complicated feelings toward Antony than other reviews may suggest. However, I did find her changes to be a bit too fast, and the other relationships underdeveloped (e.g. her family). Still, I’ll want to see where this story goes in the next book.

This review will be cross-posted on goodreads when reviews for this title are un-blocked. I may also post this review on my Instagram in the near future.

I am going to try to keep this review spoiler-free and if there is anything that would be a spoiler I will give a warning!

If I had to rate the first half of the book I would give it 4 stars. It was intriguing and kept me flipping the pages quickly. The second half is where it lost me up until around 80% when it picked up again. The second half I would give 3 stars. The book had a lot of potential but it ultimately didn’t give me the feelings throughout that I was looking for. That’s not to say I didn’t have any feelings towards the topics discussed though which we will get into.

The book is told from one point-of-view and it comes from Ruying. She was born with a gift from Death and can steal life from anyone. I thought that she was a strong character. She didn’t want to use her gift for the wrong reasons and tried to remain anonymous in her city when those with gifts were being snatched from their beds on raids by the Romans. Obviously her plan doesn’t really go according to plan and I knew in that moment what was to come.

I would say that she has good relationships with her family, but there are only a couple scenes that involve her grandma or sister. The reader is to feel something that isn’t really there. I am big on family bonds, but this one lacked a lot. Ruying does talk about them a lot though and we do get the backstory of how the opian drug destroyed her family in more ways than one. I did feel for her situation and it made me think of The Poppy War. There are a few similarities between the two books when it comes to addiction and oppression.

There isn’t much to say about the other characters because they really were minor characters. The only one besides Ruying who wouldn’t be considered minor would be Antony and I can’t say I liked the guy. He may “try” to understand her and her culture, say nice things, and convince her that war is bad but he is a dillweed and just as cruel as those he says he doesn’t want to be like.

*Potential Spoilers Ahead!*There is a lot of controversy surrounding this book when it comes to their relationship. It can be seen on Goodreads. I really haven’t dove into those reviews so I can only speak on how I interpret the book. The author does give an author’s note at the beginning of the book as to what inspired her which included real life events. I wouldn’t say that these characters have an actual romantic relationship. There are clues of maybe their feelings changing, but that was stopped pretty quickly with the cliffhanger. I can understand why she would want to believe in Antony. Some of his actions can be good like with her first encounter of him. A lot of his actions are not though. He is a big manipulator and uses her family and those she scares about as bargaining chips for her to continue to work with him. It’s not really like she has a choice. It’s hard to understand why Ruying would want to save him. Why care for someone that is hurting your people each and everyday? I think that this is where the manipulation comes in. He is good with words. Wouldn’t you rather have peace than war? Her sister obviously disagrees with this and wants to see Rome burn. She wants to use every able body to bring them to their knees. I do understand both sides. Each side will have casualties regardless. Ruying just sees her “way” as the best one forward with less.*End of Potential Spoilers*

It’s interesting having magic and science be a big part of the book. The magic was cool and I liked learning about others abilities even if they weren’t always present. A lot of the action happens behind the scenes and it was frustrating at times. Why talk about her job as an assassin if we aren’t going to see anything?

The book is very repetitive and that is what made the second half hard to get through. It was the same things said over and over again. I just needed more from everything else!

Overall, this was good for the most part. I would consider reading the sequel but I’d wait to see what others have said about it first.

Unfortunately, I found this book needed more editing and development. It was incredibly redundant in the way it shared information and had big holes in its worldbuilding and the buinding of its characters. The repeititive and over-burdened prose made this difficult to read. The emphasis on tropes in an enemies-to-lovers kind of romance left the plot feeling overly-convenient and the characters feeling inconsistent. I don't think that tying this work to real historical events and then santizing the depiction of them to focus on a romantic relationship made this a positive or pleasant or additive reading experience.

Thank you Net Galley and publishers for allowing me to read this for an honest review of this book.

Overall this book had its enjoyable moments and I'll probably read the rest of the series cause cliff hangers, but it wasn't my go to type of book. It got way too political and war happy to me. One side of the war is overtaking the other and there's a love interest going on between the two sides that we're supposed to just accept? I didn't vibe with that too much. He's killing her people but she's just supposed to accept it and fall in love? It felt forced. I enjoyed the concept of magic vs science though, like who will win in this battle? Magic powers or machine guns and electricity. I do enjoy how the fmc is really strong and brave and is willing to sacrifice herself for her people. Goodreads won't allow me to rate and review so I give this a 3/5

Thank you to NetGalley and Del Rey (Random House Ballantine) for giving me an eARC of this title in exchange for an honest review!

I requested this book originally for a couple reasons: 1) because it’s next month’s Illumicrate book and I wanted to know if I was going to want to get the next crate, and 2) because I’d heard this was one of the books that had been “review bombed” a few months earlier, so I wanted to support it if I could. Well, I definitely got my answer to whether I want the crate or not— but that unfortunately means my review won’t really be supporting this book.

I saw reviews ahead of time saying that this book was a “colonizer romance,” but given what I knew about the review bombing I wanted to give it a chance anyway. Unfortunately, all those reviews were exactly correct. This was absolutely a colonizer romance, and it wasn’t until the last maybe five pages, that the protagonist, Ruying, grew a brain and a spine and decided to turn against the invading empire and the “man she loved.” That’s really the only reason I gave this book two stars rather than one (that, and the writing was, in general, technically sound).

In general, Ruying’s motivations were confusing at the best of times and downright nonsensical at the worst. She says that everything she does is for her family, and then blatantly turns against everything her family believes in. I know that she was supposed to be an unreliable narrator, but in reality she was more of an “impossible to follow” narrator. There were so many sections that I had to reread multiple times to get a sense of what she was trying to convey— and even then I’d roll my eyes and ask myself what on earth she thought she was doing.

No book deserves to be review bombed. But, I’m sorry, I spent ten days slogging my way through this novel and I can’t bring myself to give it more than two stars.

To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods is a strong debut featuring a unique cast and magic system. I really enjoyed the debate between the two overarching view points presented. The magic system, particularly the powers of the main character, highlight this divide.

The plot is focused on the dichotomy between magic and science. Those with magic are citizens of the Er-Lang empire. While those without, are citizens of a new age Roman empire, that value science over magic. Our main character, Ruying, is a citizen of Er-Lang living in the remains of Er-Lang empire's controlled half of Jing-City. This side of the city has turned into the slums, as a result of the Romans overtaking the other half. We watch as her circumstances back her into a corner and force her to choose a path forward that goes against her core values. Citizens of Er-Lang are looked down upon and treated as less than human by the Romans.

There are fantasy, science fiction, and YA elements to this story. Along with themes of survival, oppression, and loyalty. The narration is primarily from Ruying's POV.

Ruying is a very lovable character. So much so, that I found myself crying when she was going through something particularly painful. I also thoroughly enjoyed the star-crossed romance in this story.

I loved this book and am extremely excited for the sequel!

*Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.*

I was given the opportunity to read this amazing book and I must say I could not put it down. The world that unfolds before you comes alive. When I first started to read this book I feel like it had a bit of the “Poppy Wars” vibe, however; “To Gaze Upon Wicked Gods” took this to another level and became its own tale. I will definitely be picking up this book when it comes out in a physical print. Also thank you to NetGalley one again for letting me dive into this amazing piece.

If you have enjoyed any of the Asian mythology inspired books that we've seen in the last several years, you have to try this one. The author does a great job with the worldbuilding and the plot drove all the way to the last page. I was rooting for out fmc the whole time, but some chapters I just wanted to shake her you know?? Anyways this follows the story of a girl who has the power of death and the impossible choices she makes to try and save her loved ones. I cannot wait to pick up a physical copy of this one.

I had high hopes for this book. Sadly, the book gets off to a slow start with more world building than plot. I was never able to feel immersed in the world and quit reading halfway through.

First of all, I just want to say that I am willing to give badly written books good reviews — I do it all the time — as long as I’m having fun. Unfortunately, I was not having fun! The writing, the side characters, and the pacing are all pretty bad, bordering on unreadable.

Ultimately, I just have no idea what was going on in this world, beyond the repetitive, surface level descriptions of it, and I’m not sure the author does either.

Spoilers below:
There’s a little romanticizing Stockholm Syndrome here and a lot of weird power dynamics there. The writing is very stylized but I would rather her just say the words. You can have really short, dramatic sentences for impact, but you can’t do that on every single page. It’s repetitive and occasionally feels like things come up just because the author suddenly remembered them. I’m not sure if she doesn’t trust us, as readers, to have understood the plot from the first time she said it, or if she keeps writing about it so she doesn’t forget.
There are side characters, but barely. We don’t see them very often and each of their motivations are confusing, at best. The only character whose motivations we really know is the main character and that’s because she thinks about them constantly — it’s incredibly repetitive.
The pacing is weird. The first day takes place over multiple chapters where the main character has to explain the past 20 years to us multiple times. There is SO much exposition which I just hate. I’m a “show, don’t tell” kind of person through and through. Then, 6 months have suddenly gone by. Our main character rapidly goes from being offered her assassin job to having killed 40+ people, being very good at using her abilities, and mentally coming to terms with her new life, even feeling like she’s doing the right thing, for the greater good. I hate that we don’t actually get to see this character arc and understand how she might get to this point mentally (like we do in Dark Heir or The Poppy War), we’re just thrown back into her head 6 months later.
The ending is fine, but it doesn’t really feel like an ending. With a half decent editor, this entire book could have been half as long and served as a Part 1. Remove the entire dark romance plot line with Antony, take out all of the repetitive paragraphs, and set up a plot two focusing on MC + her childhood bestie (friends to lovers?) and that could have been a good book.

Thank you to NetGalley & Del Ray for providing me with this e-ARC.