This was a really eye-opening read for me. I've always felt I was pretty familiar with OCD and how it presents itself. However, this book, which allowed me into the mind of someone suffering from OCD, gave me a whole different perspective. I never knew the intrusive thoughts could be a fear of committing violence or harm towards all the people around you. I always assumed the intrusive thoughts were fears of what could happen TO you, your family, your life, etc. Not fear of the harm you think YOU will cause. So that alone was really interesting to me.

I think the topic of OCD was really conducive to a book written in verse. It worked so well for that topic, both the visual aspect as well as the writing. I liked the writing style and found myself highlighting a lot of lines.

I also really appreciate the focus on how women are expected to fit a certain mold, and how we are treated if we don't fit that mold or perception of what people think a woman should be. The constant attention to our physical appearance, size, etc - and how we may be treated differently if we don't fit the idea of what people think makes a woman "feminine".

As for the characters, I loved Ruth, Rex, Megga, Mandy, and the weight room coach. I did feel a lot of frustration towards Ariel's parents and it took me a very long time to understand why her dad treated her the way he did. But once I got it, it definitely changed my perspective.
I also would've loved more scenes with Leah, who is Ariel's closest friend. She was referenced and brought up a lot in the book, but we didn't get to experience Ariel and Leah spending time together, as I would have liked.

At any rate, it was overall a pretty good book. It was easy to read and had a really good message. I do think it could've been shorter, but it wasn't so long that the length bothered me.

Thank you to NetGalley for the e-arc in exchange for my honest review.

A novel-in-verse that explores both OCD and the societal expectations placed on gender.

Heavy, dark and quite unsettling. Whenever I read this, I was left with a sense of unease. While the feelings were unpleasant, I have to admit that Cole did a remarkable job of dropping readers into the mind of someone struggling with OCD (with a particular emphasis on violent intrusive thoughts). Worry, anxiety, fear, struggles, and insecurities are all thoroughly conveyed.

Well written and quite informative. It did feel a bit long at times, but this is an important book for raising awareness of OCD.

5 stars

Wow, talk about a violent, unsettling, beautiful journey. This does such a good job of putting you in the head of a teen struggling with religious conservative parents, friendships, and OCD/intrusive thoughts. It isn’t comfortable, especially at first but that really highlights the point of the prose. I loved the end and how it made sure to get the point across that it wasn’t something teens could just solve by themselves. I want to protect Ariel forever. I think a lot of teens (and adults) can relate to a few of the themes here.

Thank you to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

This is the second novel in verse I’ve read from Olivia A Cole and I will read any future novels. It takes real talent to make a reader feel such deep emotions especially with a novel written in verse.

This book made me feel so many things: anger, sadness, anxiety, concern and I could keep going. This was a tough read for me because I found myself relating to Ariel more than I would’ve liked. I found the thoughts raging in her mind exhausting. I couldn’t imagine having to live in Ariel’s mind.

This was a five star read for me because it made me feel so many different things I felt like this novel had such a powerful message.

A moving, fascinating look at the world from the perspective of a young woman with OCD and suffering from intrusive thoughts, as she learns who she really is and connects with others who feel equally different from the people around them. Really engaging and interesting, plus it's a carnival-based coming-of-age story—I think we can all agree that running away to the circus or working summers at a carnival make for some of the most intriguing ways to come of age.

As a caveat, I try to give novels "in verse" an extra benefit of the doubt, because I consider my inability to click with them a failing of mine and not of them—but I really, really find it difficult to click with them. But here we have the absolute exception that proves the rule. Maybe it didn't do some of the things that usually so pull me out of a poetry-based novel (constant actual rhyming, line breaks in the middle of every sentence to keep the meter, etc.), or maybe I was just too engrossed and involved to care! Even if you usually read the words "novel-in-verse" or "lyrically written" and run in the other direction, give this one a chance.

I enjoyed reading Dear Medusa so I was pretty excited when I seen Ariel Crashes a Train by Olivia A. Cole was being published.
This is such a poignant story and I’m so glad I had the chance to read it.
A thought-provoking and honestly important story that should be read by all.
The writing immediately sucked me in and held me captive.
An emotional YA novel in verse.

Thank You NetGalley and Random House Children's, Labyrinth Road for your generosity and gifting me a copy of this amazing eARC!

This book, in feelings, has crashed into me. That's the kind of emotional mess I feel. Also want to go ahead and recommend for any readers to please look at the content warnings for this book.

Parents that seem oppressively in control of themselves and their own separate lives, and in a sense, this includes Ariel. Ariel already feels too large to fit in and wonders at questions of gender and many things. But Ariel's real struggles are their own thoughts. Thoughts that seem to swish and slide around like a huge destructive, blood-craving crocodile. What Ariel can't figure out alone is that it's not them... it's a type of OCD.

This author is a brilliant poet, and I am once again amazed. This one was particularly emotional, I think, because it was a bit longer and had me on edge longer. It was a very intense but important read.

Out March 12, 2023!

Thank you, Netgalley and Publisher, for this Arc!

Ariel’s life is determined by rules. Sure, there are the infuriating societal rules about what, exactly, it means to be a girl that she, a tall young woman who wears size 12 sneakers, isn’t really sure she wants to follow. But there are also the rules she’s made for herself to protect everyone she knows from harm.

Because Ariel believes she’s a monster. Her mind is constantly filled with horrifying thoughts: What if she grabs the knives from the kitchen and kills her parents? What if she pushes an old lady in front of an oncoming bus? What if she lets the train ride at the summer carnival where she works fly off the tracks, killing all the children onboard?

When she’s not Googling serial killers to make sure she’s not like them, she’s walking six miles to work because she can’t drive or take the bus. She’s walking 64 laps around her room to quiet the “crocodile” in her mind (an apt metaphor) and keep her father safe. She’s counting, praying, and reciting mantras to avoid asking her sister and her best friend for reassurance: hasn’t she burdened them enough?

When Ariel’s sister learns about OCD and intrusive thoughts, she urges Ariel to seek help, but their religious father refuses to send her to therapy, believing prayer is sufficient. Her sister and friends, however, refuse to give up on her, and they patiently show her that, just maybe, she’s not the monster she fears herself to be.

I am beyond thrilled that this book exists. Cole is a talented writer (we loved Dear Medusa), and her gorgeous novel-in-verse perfectly captures the experience of struggling with OCD, particularly Harm OCD, an often overlooked subtype. She captures the terror, the irrationality, the doubt and uncertainty, the self-reinforcing cycle, and the immense burden of shame and isolation, but she also accurately explains the language of recovery, particularly exposure therapy, that powerfully changes the lives of those who struggle. Her exploration of religion and gender identity add additional layers to the portrayal.

OCD frequently goes undiagnosed for years, especially when it doesn’t manifest in the stereotypical contamination and organizing subtypes. This is a book that I needed to read when I was younger, and I hope it helps other young men and women know that they are not monsters, they are not alone, and they are not without hope.

The novel does include profanity, as you’re considering its appropriateness for your own classroom.

Thank you NetGalley and Sharon Robertson for sending this book for review consideration. All opinions are our own.

Review will be posted at https://threeheads.works/category/blog/ya-books/ on 4/22.

Dear Medusa is one of my favorite novels in verse so I was very excited to read Cole’s next book. Ariel feels like she’s too much of everything: too big, too broad, too queer and too much. She deals with OCD and intrusive thoughts and is terrified to let anybody in for fear they’ll see what goes on in her head. This is very much a character driven novel, not a lot of action, but I still felt very invested in the story. Besides OCD, Ariel Crashes A Train covers topics like body dysmorphia, transphobia, sexual harassment, racism and grief. I thought each topic was done with such care. I absolutely loved this book Cole’s writing style and especially her note at the end about her own struggle with OCD. I highly recommend this one, but definitely make sure you’re in the right mindset to read it. It is a lot, but it’s such a necessary book.

CW: descriptions of intrusive thoughts, mental illness, ableism, body shaming, dysphoria, mentions of suicide, suicidal thoughts, transphobia

Thank you to NetGalley and Random House Children’s for an advanced digital reader’s copy in exchange for an honest review.

I got to 35% and had to stop. I have OCD and the accuracy of Ariel's intrusive thoughts were becoming too much for me to read. I know it says in the book blurb that Ariel has OCD but I was expecting it almost to be glossed over and not be so explicit (it's necessary). Instead, it dug in and kept going on and on. The use of verse instead of prose was a masterful move -- no chapter breaks allows for the story to go on without stopping which feels very real.

In summary, this is an instance where it was definitely a me problem. I may get back to this book when I'm in a better headspace but for now, I can't.

4.25 stars.

I requested this ARC because I loved Olivia A. Cole's Dear Medusa. I didn't remember the description, so it's a testament to how well Cole portrayed OCD that I was able to identify it before Ariel realized it. After reading the acknowledgments, I understand why and appreciate Cole's exploration of the topic.

I loved the portrayal of the crocodile brain. I loved the support Ariel gets from her new friends and her sister and even her boss. I wish Ariel could have gotten more support from her parents, but that's just realistically not the case in many situations. Still sucks, though. I enjoyed the concept of challenging gender and racism and all the mental health topics that connected Ruth and Rex and Ariel. I think the book was a little longer than it needed to be, though I definitely enjoyed the novel-in-verse style. I'd recommend this for people who love stories about mental health that feature queer characters.

Rep: OCD (MC), lesbian (MC), trans (side character)

Thanks so much to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read and review!

Written in verse, this book follows Ariel as she tries to figure out her identity while having a very debilitating fear that she is going to physically hurt those she loves.

Through help from some new friends and a loyal sister, Ariel learns that she has OCD. Unfortunately, for unspecified reasons (except maybe God heals all?) her parents refuse therapy as an option.

There was a lot to love about this book. The cadence, the themes, the friendships and the focus on not quite fitting into societies expectations. However, I do feel like it went on for too long and it became difficult to get through. The themes were repeated often, which I understand reinforces the struggle of mental health, but as a reading experience it became a bit of a slog.

I think a novel told in verse can be a powerful thing and can really elevate a book that deals with heavy subject matters. But in order for it to be successful, I need to be able to feel the impact of each word.

Ariel Crashes a Train tells the story of a teenager with undiagnosed OCD. I came in with high expectations given that I love both novels-in-verse and books centered on mental health. However, I felt that here the format did a disservice to the subject. Many times it didn’t feel like I was reading poetic entries, but rather clunky sentences that lacked emotion. More than once the structure switched to paragraphs and there were more times this read like a transcript than verses of poems.

It was sad to see Ariel constantly struggle with the obsessive harmful thoughts. Her aloof parents offered no help, but she had an amazing older sister, Mandy, who always stood by and helped her. She meets Rex and Ruth during her summer job, and though both young, they exhibit so much understanding and acceptance that Ariel was missing from her parents and others.

I enjoyed seeing the growth in Ariel after she learns she is not soon to be serial killer (her thoughts), but rather a teen dealing with OCD. I loved seeing her sister and friends (and even her boss) join together to help her. I just wish the format had been different as I didn’t feel any of the emotions I am sure Ariel felt. It ended up reading like a novel stripped of feelings rather than one infused with them as novels told-in-verse tend to be.

I received an advanced copy through Netgalley in return for an honest review.

A huge thank you to NetGalley and Random House Children's for the digital ARC of "Ariel Crashes a Train" by Olivia A. Cole.

Olivia has done it again. I am absolutely in love with another one of their books. I think I still love "Dear Medusa" a little more though... but once again, I have devoured a book so quickly and gone back to re-read. And again, I was left sobbing over a character... heartbroken for Ariel and their struggles with not only their mental health but their identity as well. By the end, I was so relieved seeing them taking those first steps.

Last year, I read quite a few nonfiction books dealing with OCD experiences, and even though they were in-depth about their experiences, struggles, intrusive thoughts, and their relationships... this Novel-in-Verse was able to make those same things so much more vivid. The one thing that stood out in "Ariel Crashes a Train" was touching on religion. The book really did a great job highlighting the trauma people experience due to the stigma that some religious organizations have when it comes to mental health: seen as demon possession, or something that can be prayed away.

Also, after reading the Acknowledgements in the book, I appreciate this book even more seeing how personal this would be for the author to write.

Conveniently, Olivia A. Cole publishes their books mid-March, and for two years in a row, these books are going to make an excellent birthday gift for me to give myself.

5/5

I really loved Dear Medusa, Olivia A. Cole's last book, so I was really excited to read this one, but it just didn't hit like the last one did. While I think this book's incredibly heavy subject matter is important and deserves reading, the in-verse writing style for this was confusing and seemed disjointed at time. It was hard to follow, but maybe reading it in book form, and not e-book form, would have made a difference.

I will certainly give this a reread when it comes out, and will definitely consider it for my school library.

I absolutely adored this novel in verse! I think this is the first book I've read by Olivia Cole and I will absolutely continue to seek out Olivia's work!

**Thank you to NetGalley and Random House Childrens for this ARC in exchange for an honest review**

It is clear from the first few lines that Ariel suffers from obsessive-compulsive disorder -- and I mean SUFFERS. Her whole life is filled with dark, intrusive thoughts about possibly harming everyone around her, especially her family and friends.

Ariel is left alone for the summer, as her sister Miranda (Mandy) has gone away to college, and her best friend Leah is in DC for Young Chemists with her boyfriend. She does not have a very good relationship with her parents, who are religious, racist, and nothing is ever good enough for them. They are always going out to dinner, and don't like to tip. Her dad does not believe in therapy, so Ariel is not allowed to get help for her condition. He just thinks that prayer will fix everything. She also doesn't fit her mother's standard of femininity.

For the past two summers, Ariel and Leah had worked at a carnival called Wildwood. Ariel decides she is still going to work there this year, even without Leah. She meets two new friends, Ruth and Rex, and they bond over grief among other things.

Although Mandy is away at school, she still reaches out to Ariel frequently and tries to help, as she is one of the few people that knows what's going on in Ariel's head. She's studying religion and psychology, and suggests that Ariel might have OCD. However, she understands what is really needed is professional help that she can neither provide, nor can her sister get somewhere else because of their parents. Mandy listens. Mandy cares. Mandy does her best.

I don't think Leah is a very good friend to Ariel, despite being her best friend. She goes to DC and doesn't talk to her at all except for a few very short texts. Leah doesn't know about Ariel's condition, but she still doesn't check in on her, tell any stories about her time there, or send any photos like you'd expect from a good friend. It's like she no longer exists. Ariel is honestly better off just hanging out with Ruth and Rex and forgetting Leah.

This book is a reminder of how important mental health care is, and how it should be accessible for everyone. We are also not supposed to be stuffed into boxes with certain expectations weighing us down. We are worthy of respect regardless of how we live our lives. You are not too much; you are not "too" anything.

I loved the book Dear Medusa--it was such a great story. And I guess I was expecting the same with this one. Alas, it was not so.. This book is a loo at mental illness and a narrator who has intrusive thoughts--so many that they really get in the way of telling the story. And really, I could only read so much about how she wants to bash her mom in the face or push little old ladies in front of the city bus, before I realized that no, this was NOT the book for me. Hard to follow, it was not my thing.

This book tugged at my heartstrings and kept me on my toes. I was rooting for Ariel and really loved the friendships she was able to find. Great discussions of gender and identity.

“It definitely matters. We don’t just live in the world. We have to live inside our heads too.”
🐊
Ariel is afraid of what she might do. She doesn’t fit into the cookie cutter mold of society. She’s too big, too queer, constantly confused for a man, can’t live up to her parents’ expectations for her and her best friend just told her she’s going to DC for the summer instead of working at the local carnival like they always do. Ariel is now well and truly alone. Just her and the crocodile that lives in her mind, telling her she’s a danger to others and will harm them. When she meets coworkers Rex and Ruth, they help her when her sister at college is able to diagnose Ariel with OCD. Even with a diagnosis, Ariel still struggles to believe she won’t hurt other people.
🐊
Wow. This was such a unique YA novel in verse. If you haven’t read Dear Medusa yet, pick it up immediately, as it was one of my favorite YA books ever. This one addresses the topic of OCD in a way I’ve yet to see portrayed in novels before. It also tackles the patriarchy and what gender really is in a wholly original way too. This title would be amazing to study in high school, as students would have such interesting perspectives on it. This title is out March 12.

CW: suicide, suicide ideation, blood, intrusive thoughts of murder/harm, OCD, depression, police brutality, murder, gun use, racism, transphobia

A bit too long/repetitive to the point where it felt like the author was trying to hit us over the head with it.