Becoming Ted, by Matt Cain, is a quick, fun read about changes and new beginnings. When Ted's life takes a very unexpected turn he has to move on and live, and that he does!
Thanks, NetGalley and the publisher, for providing me with the ARC ebook I read and reviewed. All opinions are my own.

43-year-old Ted is devastated when his husband of what Ted thought were 20 wonderful years, Giles, leaves him for a younger, more exciting man. And once Ted begins to realize how Giles has demeaned him and held him back from his dreams, Ted begins working toward his childhood dream of becoming a drag queen. It takes Ted a while, but he gets there in the end, and in between is a big-hearted story that captivated me to the very end.

There's a lot of characters here but Matt Cain richly develops each one - Ted's parents and their expectation that Ted will continue with the family's ice cream business, his new relationship with Oskar who grew up in homophobic Poland, Ted's best friend and top supporter Denise who values her independence but hopes for "a future that might just involve happiness", 90+ year old Stanley who is not letting life pass him by, even Lily, the very un-cute terrier with "weapons-grade halitosis."

There's a lot of baggage to get past here, but the book resonates with the idea that "There's no point regretting things we did in the past because if it wasn't for them, we wouldn't be where we are in the present." There are numerous flashbacks to Ted's childhood and his relationship with Giles, but at times it's hard to immediately realize the time period has shifted. And there's a subplot involving mysterious letters that just didn't work for me, but I absolutely loved the conclusion of this book, which admittedly is a total feel-good fest of happiness.

But I love how Ted becomes liberated from his sense of duty and realizes that he can "put myself first and follow my dream - but I can also take the people I love along with me." 4 stars and many thanks to Storm Publishing for the ARC.

In Becoming Ted, our title character is a 43 year old gay man, married to the husband of his dreams, living in a small British seaside town and working for his fourth generation family run ice cream business. Sounds ideal, right?! Unless you secretly dislike ice cream and your husband of nearly 20 years ups and leaves you for another man…

In the process, Ted is forced to self-reflect and decide what is important in his life, and what the future looks like from here. Through the help of his longtime friend Denise and some new allies he picks up along the way, Ted is able to realize maybe his marriage wasn’t just as great as he thought it was. He starts putting Ted first, and the growth and journey we get to join him on is so fun. If you’re a fan of RuPaul’s Drag Race and Cher, then you will definitely love this book!

It was truly heartwarming to see Ted go from being broken with zero self confidence, to finding his voice and learning to shine on his own. There is growth across the supporting characters as well, and the cast offers diverse British perspectives from an elderly gay male, cis hetero female, immigrants, divorcees etc.

I really connected with the storyline of Ted’s family owning an ice cream business and him not liking ice cream. My Dad spent his whole career working for Land O’ Lakes making cheese, butter and milk and I’m lactose intolerant and couldn’t eat any of it 🤣 The only part that was a little off for me here was the mystery storyline thrown in… didn’t really seem to fit in the narrative and I didn’t love the result of it.

Overall, a super quick, feel good read about discovering what makes you happy and embracing the chances to make your dreams come true! Great way to kick off my Pride reads, thank you to NetGalley and Kensington Publishing for the advanced copy. Snag a copy for yourself everywhere TODAY!!

Ted is, and has always been, a bona-fide "We"-man; combining his personality with his husband's, creating a perfect little "we." But when Miles abruptly leaves, ending their 20-year relationship, Ted is feeling more than a little scraped out. He realizes that he has spent his who life going along with whay everyone else (his parent, his coworkers, his parter), he never really had time to learn who he is.
This book had a lot of promise; Ted is sweet, and the characters are fun and realistic, but unfortunately this story was quite flat. Bouncing back and forth between current day and Ted's past was clever to show us how much of himself Ted had set aside, but it was confusingly written. The little bit of romance lacked chemistry, and the random mystery felt more than out of place. But overall, this was a sweet, safe read.
3.5 stars.

Can Cher & RuPaul save your life?

Perhaps Ted would answer yes.

This book is absolutely lovely. Ted is such a believable and lovable character. His self-doubt and insecurities are so relatable - his feelings of being a disappointment to others hit a bit close to a nerve. And his growth (especially self-esteem) is the highlight of this story.

The irony of an ice cream shoppe owner who doesn't care for ice cream is not lost on this reader. 🍦

"...he braces himself. His plan is to avoid being drawn into chats with his colleagues and to lose himself in work. 'It's the only way I'll be able to make it through the day.'"

Ted, you remind me of Less, Andrew Sean Greer's magnum opus. In a good way! Definitely recommend both of these reads.

A charming book set in a seaside town in England about a gay man finding his true self after his husband leaves him. There is a good cast of supporting characters that move the story along but ultimately this book is all about Ted. A great read to start of Pride Month.

I'm rounding this up from 3.5. I really did enjoy the overall story. There were just a few things that didn't work well for me.

I will say this much, I am surprised to learn that this is not a debut.

With this book’s premise, I think I understand what the author was trying to do, but style and plot choices were made that didn't quite work for me. Prose in present tense, multiple POVs, the almost unnecessary plot twist of Ted’s parents cheating on each other, and the bizarre comments that read as almost problematic but I think were intended to bring some levity maybe? Like the way Ted’s parents assumed that bc he’s gay he’d move cross country where the clubs are better? Okay. I guess it happens, but it’s not, like, compulsory.

So while there was an attempt and though I was glad this book ended with Ted living his best life, in the end, I don't think this author's style is for me.

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for a copy of this book. The story is quite entertaining, funny to read with a happy ending every reader expects. Meaning, one can achieve his goals and make dreams come true.

I enjoyed reading about Ted's journey post-breakup and his attempts to attain his dream of being a drag queen. The story felt unique and was very well-paced. There was just enough character development without feeling unrealistic. I give this book a solid 3.5/5 stars.

Thank you to NetGalley and Kensington Books for the opportunity to review Becoming Ted. All opinions are my own.

First thanks to Kensington book and NetGalley for an advanced readers copy in exchange for an honest review.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Synopsis: Ted has been with his husband Giles for a very long time when his husband announces he is leaving him. Ted needs to adjust his life and what he planned on doing for the rest of his life.

What I liked: this book was very sweet and loved how Ted adjusted to his new life. He has always put others first but decides this time to put himself first. However he still helps out his friends and makes things easier for them. He discovers a lot about himself and what he really wants. He also meets a new group of friends who really help him grow and learn. They span from the young to old. I really enjoyed the history that was shared about gay and drag.

I would recommend this book to someone who is going through changes or just wants a fun light read.

Thank you NetGalley and Kensington Books for the ARC of Becoming Ted.

Becoming Ted by Matt Cain is a story of self-discovery and transformation, centering on the protagonist Ted Ainsworth as he navigates the aftermath of his partner Giles leaving him for another man. The description hints at themes of identity, resilience, and the journey towards embracing one's true self.

Ted's journey from feeling unremarkable and living in the shadow of his partner to rediscovering his own potential and pursuing his long-held dreams seems like a compelling narrative arc. The exploration of Ted's character, his relationships, and his newfound sense of freedom and possibility promises to be both relatable and inspiring to readers.

Cain's writing style appears to be engaging and character-driven, with a focus on introspection and personal growth. The themes of love, loss, and self-empowerment resonate with universal experiences, making "Becoming Ted" a story that many readers may find both touching and uplifting.

Overall, Becoming Ted seems like a heartfelt and poignant novel that delves into the complexities of love, identity, and the courage it takes to embrace change. It's likely to appeal to readers who enjoy character-driven stories with themes of self-discovery and resilience.

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this book ahead of publication! My review will appear on my blog on 6/03/24. I will also feature the review on Instagram that same day and post my review to Goodreads, The Storygraph, Fable, and retail sites.

Review:

I always love when I find books focused on middle-aged gay men, especially when they are more than just a cliche or a side character, and that is precisely what I got from this book.

In this novel, readers are introduced to Ted Ainsworth, a character who may seem ordinary at first glance but proves to be anything but. Ted is a 40-something-year-old gay man who is happily married and works at his parent's ice cream shop in Lancashire. Ted's job isn't exactly exciting, and he knows he lets people walk all over him, but he has a super-sexy husband named Giles, a lovely house, and a sweet dog. You can't have everything, right? And at least he has stability, and he's happy.

But when Ted stumbles upon pictures of his beloved husband with another man, and Giles confesses that he has been seeing someone and wants to end their marriage, Ted's world shatters. Ted's entire life has been driven by what Giles thought or wanted. Who is Ted without him? How could he possibly go on?

With the help and encouragement of his best friend and fellow RuPaul's Drag Race fan, Denise, Ted discovers a new side of himself. Giles didn't want Ted to join the choir because it was too gay, and Ted was too afraid to admit to Giles that he'd dreamed of doing drag since he saw his first drag queen when he was a kid. But Giles isn't around anymore, and Ted is going to chase his dreams, and along the way, he'll find out that he is just fine without Giles, thank you very much.

What resonated with me the most in this book was how the author paints a detailed portrait of Ted, allowing us to truly understand his thoughts, fears, and desires. Ted was incredibly relatable. How many of us turn over so much of ourselves to our partner that, eventually, our life decisions rest on their shoulders? How many of us have given up parts of ourselves just to make our significant other happy?

I loved how the author explored these themes and how relatable it all was. We witness Ted's struggles and triumphs as he navigates the murky waters of heartbreak and self-discovery. Ted's transformation from a timid, self-doubting man into a confident and liberated individual is a joy to witness. The author handles Ted's character development with sensitivity and nuance, and I couldn't help but root for him the entire way.

Cain's writing style is engaging, and the dialogue is witty and natural, adding depth to the characters and bringing them to life. The relationships portrayed in the book feel authentic and heartfelt, making it easy to invest in the characters' journeys. I also loved how effortlessly Cain balances light-hearted banter with poignant reflections, creating a story that is both entertaining and thought-provoking. The novel's emotional depth is complemented by its sharp wit, making it thoroughly enjoyable.

I also appreciated the side story of Oskar ( a new guy that Ted meets along his journey). Oskar is Polish and struggles with his sexuality. He deals with internalized homophobia and struggles with his identity. While his story is important (hello, I've been there), I sometimes felt it weighed down the story a bit. It didn't ruin the book for me, but it would have worked just as well without it. There was also a side story centering on Ted's friend Denise that didn't bring much to the overall story and, honestly, could have been cut, and the book would have flowed much better.

Ultimately, I found this book to be a heartfelt and uplifting tale that was the perfect read to kick off my Pride Month reading. It is a reminder that there is always time to start over, to chase your dreams, and to become the person you were always meant to be. I highly recommend this book to anyone looking for a compelling and heartwarming read.

Thank you so much to Kensington Books for allowing me the ARC via NetGalley of Becoming Ted before its US debut. I really loved this feel-good, comfort read that stands as a superb tribute to transformation and celebration of self.

Ted Ainsworth is happy to live a cozy, quiet life with his husband of twenty years in the sleepy seaside town he grew up in. It’s a setting where he’s known, at least for his family’s popular ice cream parlor, and where he’s comfortable. But when his husband, Giles, suddenly announces he’s in love with someone else, Ted’s life is sent into a tailspin as he begins to question his purpose and what’s really left outside of his marriage to make his life meaningful. The loss is also an opportunity to be (perhaps for the first time) more himself than ever, and pursue a dream he’s long set aside to appease everyone else.

This book really got me. We often feel very trapped in our decisions and the trajectory of our lives. It feels too late to do something different, but missed opportunities can really sit like an unbearable weight in the gut. Living fully in truth and especially doing so unapologetically is scary, even impossible. But every loss is as much to be considered as it is to be grieved; there’s something gained or learned, and something new that comes of it. And here we have a front row seat to Ted’s becoming, which is something to be cherished and admired.

This was my first Matt Cain novel, and I’ll definitely check out the Secret Life of Albert Entwistle next. He creates lovable characters you root for, and infuses his work with relatable, moving reminders about life, love, and happiness. Ted is a good reminder that it’s never too late to find yourself. Don’t be afraid… say hello.

A brilliant moving book on friendship and becoming yourself.
Ted is happily married to Giles or so he thought he was until Giles leaves him for someone younger and he`s devastated until his best friend Denise reminds him of everything that Giles held him back from doing and Ted always put everyone first helping his family run the family ice cream shop whilst not telling them he hates ice cream, and Giles put Ted off his dream of being a drag queen.
Can Ted turn his life around and live for himself with the help of Denise and her loyal support he tries to and his friendship with Oskar is so emotional it brings tears to your eyes.
Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the ARC and I give my honest review.

2.5 stars. The heart of this novel is marvelous, warm and gooey and full of great messaging about finding your voice a little later in life. Unfortunately, I struggled to get past the writing, which felt like it needed quite a few more rounds of editing. I think someone must have gotten on Cain once upon a time for using "says" and "said" too much in his dialogue, so I had to suffer through characters tweeting, squealing, chirping, gasping, and panting their lines, among other verbs I've since blocked out. At any rate, Ted's journey to self-discovery is lovely - dumped by his cheating husband, he confronts his antipathy about working at his family's ice cream business and discovers his long-suppressed dream of becoming a drag queen. I could have done without him finding a new love, as it felt too soon, but Oskar's character was lovely as well, as was the entire supporting cast. Thank you to NetGalley, Kensington Books, and A John Scognamiglio Book for a digital review copy.

Oh wow! One of my books of the year. A read I loved from the start and didn’t want it to end.
Ted has just split up from his husband Giles, much to Ted’s surprise. He found pictures of Giles with another man on his phone in more than friendly positions. Ted has been with Giles for a long time and it was his first proper relationship. He works at his parents company and shop- Ainsworth’s ice cream, which he has never dared to tell them he doesn't love as much as them and he doesn't even like ice cream. Slowly Ted realises his life isn't what he thought it would be and splitting from Giles just might encourage him to follow his dream of becoming a drag queen. Egged on by his best friend Denise he tries out heels and more. On the way he discovers more about himself than he ever thought possible. Who is the real Ted and is his dream just that?

Oh be still my beating heart. I loved Ted so much I wanted to give him a hug. This is a read about far more than a story, it's about life and being true to yourself not living the life others may choose for you. About not feeling guilty and being grateful to others for things that should be taken for granted. Something some of us sadly don’t realise until much later in life. There’s nothing wrong with dreams and whilst not all of them may be completely achievable the fun on the journey can be immeasurable. Thank you Matt, you’ve reaffirmed a few things for me, things we all should know but often forget in the busy-ness of day to day life. More than a book, this is a life affirming read for everyone. Be who you are, One life live it.


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I listened to The Secret Life Of Albert Entwistle back in 2022 and it ended up being one of my favorite stories of the year, so to say that I've been highly anticipating Becoming Ted is an understatement. I loved the sound of the premise with Ted rediscovering who he really is after his husband of twenty years leaves him... And I've been looking forward to dive in and properly meet Ted. I'm not sure if I had simply set my expectations a bit too high; while I did enjoy this newest story, there were also a couple niggles that prevented me from handing out the full five stars.

I still love the premise of the story, and I could truly appreciate how it focuses on different aspects of the queer community. This story doesn't only shows us what it is like being a gay couple in the present, but there is also focus on the struggles of being gay in the 1950s and growing up in a Catholic Poland where people don't accept gays. It's also a story about drag and everything it entails including prejudices and struggles... And there is focus on the fear/hesitance to come out and being afraid to show the world who you really are.

Becoming Ted uses a multiple POV structure, although we mainly stick with Ted and the Polish immigrant Oskar. There are many flashbacks to the past to be found along the way, and I do confess that the jumps to the past sometimes caught me off guard as they always happened mid-chapter. That said, they were always relevant and helped explain certain thoughts and why the characters are the way that they are. The writing itself was engaging with quite a lot of slang and a humor that could be on the sarcastic and harsh side at times. I personally didn't have an issue with it though!

As for the characters... Oh boy, I had mixed feelings. Don't get me wrong, I do love Ted and Oskar, but especially Ted also frustrated the heck out of me. The fact that he has been pushing his true self to the background his whole life and lets people walk all over him and his dreams is SO incredibly frustrating, and especially when he keeps letting it happen even after he supposedly started to put himself first for a change. Also, how he kept pining after his husband Giles even after he found out he had been cheating on him for all those months?! With Giles even flaunting his new love on social media for all to see?! I almost felt secondhand embarrassment for him... Then again, he basically only had experiences with toxic relationships in his life, so I guess he probably didn't know better.

I also wasn't a fan of just how much cheating was going on in general, and there were also too many different subplots going on that distracted from Ted's self-discovery journey. I could have done without the whole mystery letters and the family drama involving Ted's father for example... And likewise for Giles to pop up again near the end. There was a bit too much drama going on in general, and as a result Becoming Ted wasn't nearly as uplifting as I thought it would be. Sure, it ended on a high note, but there was a lot more negativity to be found than expected.

That said, I did still enjoy Becoming Ted despite those niggles, and I can still recommend this story if you don't mind a lot of drama, focus on toxic relationships, gaslighting and cheating. The snappy drag humor does help balancing things out a little!

DNF @24%

I really enjoyed Cain's previous book, but I think I couldn't really connect with this book's main character Ted. The inciting incident that led to Ted's divorce felt so... rushed? I also think Ted was kind of annoying, and I wish there was more explanation of why he wants to be a drag queen. I'm sure there's an explanation later, but I would have liked it earlier to understand his decision.

Thanks for the opportunity to read this one.

Unfortunately Matt Cain’s writing style isn’t for me. I’d wanted to give him another go and the premise sounded good but I just don’t like the writing style at all. I find it very clunky and more tell rather than show.