This is the story of a single-twin who lives a double life. Wait what? Yep....this is a hard review to write without give away a lot of information.

Eden has an accident. Mom has always mourned the loss of Eden's twin in utero. (vanishing twin syndrome). After Eden's accident, things just aren't the same.

From here you have to read it. I can't even summarize without giving things away. I didn't like the Mom and Dad characters but Eden (and her twin).....holy crap....hang on!

**Many thanks to Scene of the Crime, William Morrow, and Eleanor Barker-White for an ARC of this book via NetGalley!**

Lucy was so thrilled to FINALLY be pregnant...but even more excited when she discovered she was having twins. She had the names picked out (Eden and Eli) and the pregnancy was the center of her world...until one day, the unthinkable happened. Lucy experienced what is known as Vanishing Twin syndrome firsthand, where one twin embryo absorbs the other, leaving the second embryo 'vanished'...and leaving Lucy devastated and mourning the second twin who would never be born.

Many years later, she has worked through her grief and thrown all of her energy, attention, and love into the Twin Who Lived, Eden. Eden can be a bit of a handful, and Lucy has always been jealous of Eden's back-and-forth banter with her father, but overall she manages to put those feelings aside and fights to be the best mother she can. So when Eden doesn't return home one day, Lucy's motherly intuition tells her that something is wrong...and she is absolutely right. Eden is found by a body of water, nearly drowned, but she has survived, and doctors determine that she hasn't suffered any brain damage or sustained ANY significant injuries at all.

But there IS one major development: Eden asks...well, actually DEMANDS...to be called Eli. This aside, she starts behaving strangely, getting a bizarre haircut, and no longer feels like the 'Eden' her family and friends knew. Lucy knows that something is wrong, but there's something strangely satisfying about 'Eli' and she starts to wonder if Eden's journey into the deep may have actually been the conduit to bring her lost baby back to life. But does 'Eli' have dangerous intentions? Is this NEW version of Eden determined to eliminate all traces of her former self...no matter WHO might get hurt along the way?

Vanishing Twin syndrome is not a trope I often see in thrillers, so I was intrigued enough to give this debut author a try, and at first, I felt fairly confident this was a good decision. The opening chapters of the book (until about 30-40% or so) were intriguing, with the detailing of Eden's strange disappearance, her time in the hospital, and the chilling behavior displayed once she returns home. We are given some background on Lucy (enough to make you as the reader question her mental acuity, that's for sure!) and also the strain in her marriage, etc., so there was a lot of emotional push and pull to balance out the suspense, and the book at this point was giving me sort of the 'bad apple' vibe of stories like The Omen, where an evil spirit has infiltrated the child (or in this case, teenager) and I have to admit, I had NO Idea where this was going or what to expect from the rest of the read.

Well when it came to what to expect...the answer was "not too much."

The second half of the book almost got to the point of redundancy, as we trod over the same territory over and over with Lucy's issues which includes her spiral into her 'accepting' Eli (?!)...but then the bodies start piling up too. There are lots of unnecessary deaths that seem sort of randomly thrown in to create more tension, and to say there is an inadequate level of follow through from the police is probably a wild understatement. I was baffled by the way some of them were glossed over, and also couldn't understand why Eden's best friend Charlie had to have so many sections of narration. The author made an effort to have these sections truly feel like they were written by a teenager...but it just didn't work. On top of all of this, we ALSO get glimpses into LUCY'S tortured past (going back to her childhood and a traumatic incident) and even all of this felt more like red herrings than fully-formed backstory. I still clung to hope that all of this was leading somewhere...

And then came THAT kind of epilogue.

You know the one I mean...the kind that makes you want to actually HURL the book across the room.

I haven't had one of these in a while, and I honestly forgot how terrible they can be to read, especially when you were HOPING the last chapter would be the end of it and you just keep asking yourself "Why?" I don't often do this, but I actually felt a compulsive need to lower my rating for this book based on the ending alone. Not only is it unsatisfying, but it pointed out JUST how many loose threads there were throughout the story and made me question WHY I'd stuck with this one at all.

But by the end I think that my interest, my patience, and my appreciation for this premise might have gone the way of Eden...

...

Did anyone happen to look for it at the bottom of the river?

2.5 stars

My Name Was Eden is the debut novel by Eleanor Barker-White. When I first learned about this book I thought the premise about the disappearing twin sounded fascinating. But quite honestly I’m not really sure how I feel about this story. It was definitely different. The characters were all a little odd. Especially Lucy, the mother of Eden or Eli. I think she had been dealing with mental issues since childhood. And the father, I thought was an okay kind of guy until the question of infidelity came up. And the situation with Eden becoming Eli after the accident has me baffled. I just thought they were a really strange family and even now that I’ve finished the book, I’m not really sure what to make of it. It left me feeling a little confused as to what actually happened and why. I’d like to thank the Scene of the Crime Early Read program, Chris Connolly, Publicity & Marketing Manager @ William Morrow and NetGalley for the arc to read and review. I’d consider this to be a psychological thriller with short easy to read chapters that left me feeling puzzled and full of questions. Because of this I’m going to rate this book at 3 stars.

The story is intriguing and keeps you reading, even through its shortfalls., like a rather unlikable main character and inconsistencies in the plot line. An easy read and the short chapters helped me to,stick with it.

This book was such a good time!!! Jaw dropping thriller that had me waiting for the next twist! The characters were developed well throughout. I could not put this book down once I picked it up

The premise of this book is so intriguing and I was really engaged, wanting to find out what was going on. Sadly, for me, it never delivered. Not only did I find all of the characters unlikeable, but I had questions that were never answered. The story was not terrible, I just wanted more and am left feeling just as confused as when I started it.

Thank you, NetGalley and William Morrow for the opportunity to preview this book.

3 1/2 ⭐️’s
Fourteen years ago, Lucy, was pregnant with twins. When one was absorbed, Lucy wasn’t ready to let go and has celebrated Eli right along with his sister Eden for Eden’s whole life. When Eden tragically drowns in a neighborhood pond, she is saved without a scratch. BUT …. She has come back as Eli! Is it all from the trauma or is there more to the story. Eden and her mother had a trying relationship, but Eli loves his mom. Lucy isn’t sure what to do with it all, but is basking in the attention. Accidents seem to happen around Eli, but is it all just a coincidence? Is “he” manipulating the narrative and changing the entire world that Lucy now lives in? Lucy is even questioning her marriage, is she crazy as so many think, or is there more to the story? This book definitely has a creepy vibe throughout, but doesn’t pack the punch needed to take it to the next level. Thank you to HarperCollins and NetGalley for an ARC of this book.

When the lifeless body of her teenage daughter, Eden, is pulled from a nearby lake, Lucy goes cold with fear, thinking the worst has happened — until she hears her sputter and cough. At the hospital shortly after, she’s relieved to find out Eden suffered no physical injuries or brain damage from her near drowning. But as Lucy, her husband James, and her mother-in-law gather around Eden’s bedside, she delivers shocking news. She’s no longer their daughter Eden. Eden died in the lake. Instead, she’s Eli, Eden’s unborn twin brother who disappeared in utero.

James and his mother don’t believe what they’re hearing. Who would? It’s unfathomable if not impossible. However, Lucy’s secretly pleased with the idea of getting a second chance to be a good mother. She’d never been close to Eden. Eden loved James, not her. It’s the opposite with Eli. He’s affectionate and sweet to his mother, willing to do anything for her including turning against his dad. Yet, Lucy can’t shake the feeling that something’s off about him, especially after another family tragedy occurs. But before she has a chance to figure things out with Eli/Eden, a string of other devastating events occurs that call Lucy’s sanity and character into question. On top of it all, she’s still struggling to work through her own childhood trauma resulting from the death of her infant brother Elliott.

Gripping, complex, and tinged with just enough creepiness to make your spine shiver, “My Name Was Eden” is the psychological debut by Eleanor Barker-White. “My Name Was Eden” starts out as one of those incredible, unputdownable reads. You’ll race through the pages as Barker-White quickly introduces the main narrator Lucy, drowns her teenage daughter Eden, then turns Eden into her twin brother Eli who disappeared in utero fourteen years ago. Vanishing Twin Syndrome is a real-life condition, but Barker-White turns it into something straight from a horror flick. After her death, Eden’s body is possessed by her twin brother. Even though he seems sweet, there’s something in his smile that makes you want to run for the hills.

The book is definitely mind-blowingly good. At first, that is. However, as quickly as she introduces Lucy and Eden/Eli, she switches to a six-year-old Lucy’s point-of-view whose infant brother Elliott dies after a wasp-sting. It’s clear that adult Lucy never processed the trauma she suffered from his death and the events that occurred after. It’s poisoned her life in the present.

“My Name Was Eden” is full of mystery, suspense, and chilling twists. It was an uber-addicting read when it focused on the seeming possession of Eden by Eli and Vanishing Twin Syndrome. But all of the sudden, intergenerational trauma bursts onto the scene. It explains a lot about Lucy’s family dynamics, as well as her horrible relationship with Eden. Yet, just like with the Vanishing Twin Syndrome aspect of the book, it’s not fleshed out completely before you have to figure out everything else that’s going on too. There’s a lot, and it’s never 100% clear if Eden’s really dead or Eli’s really real.

“My Name Was Eden” introduces quite a few storylines, gives you a lot of questions, but doesn’t ever give complete answers. You’ll never even know for sure who narrated the prologue. That’s how untied some of the loose ends still are by the end of the story. That’s not to say this is a bad book. It may be hard to believe after the review I just gave it. But trust me, I don’t take this much time to review bad books. It was good enough. Nevertheless, without a satisfying conclusion, it missed out on being great. I’ll definitely be reading the next book Eleanor Barker-White puts out, though. By then, she’ll find her sea legs, so to speak, and it’ll be brilliant.

This was a very unique psychological thriller. The plot was intriguing and started out strong. I had never heard of vanishing twins so the idea that one of the main characters who was involved in a near drowning and woke up telling everyone they were now the vanished twin was interesting.

The family dynamics were confusing but the more I read the layers peeled back and revealed what I needed to understand for the most part. I still think there are holes that weren’t answered but that could be intentional.

I did not find the characters very likable but I don’t think they were meant to be likable.

The ending was phenomenal.

Overall a good read. Solid 3 stars.

Thank you to NetGalley, the author and publisher for the opportunity to read the ARC.

This debut psychological thriller starts with such a unique premise. Eden Hamilton is fourteen years old when she has a mysterious accident at a lake near her home. She almost dies, but when she awakens in the hospital, she insists that her name is Eli. Her mother, Lucy, is shocked because Eli is the name of Eden's twin brother who didn't survive in the womb and his death was labeled "Vanishing Twin Syndrome". (This is a real thing - I looked online to get a little more information about it.) While Eden was always close to her father, while Lucy and Eden didn't always get along, Eli is loving and supportive of her mom and acts differently in other ways, too.

The story is told from Lucy's point-of-view in the present and a few chapters from when she was a child. There are also some chapters from Charlie, Eden's friend since childhood. Getting someone else's point-of-view on some of the events helped me understand the story better, especially since some strange things occur. The book is engaging, tense, and sometimes creepy. For the most part, it was fast-paced but there were times when I was so confused, I would have to go back and reread a couple of paragraphs, so that slowed the pace of the book for me.

I was engrossed in the story throughout the book, and by the time it ends, some things have been cleared up, while others remain ambiguous or unanswered. The chilling epilogue confirmed that I was correct in my opinion about one of the main characters. If you are a thriller fan looking for something different and don't mind a story without clear-cut explanations, then this could be the book for you.

I received an advance copy of this ebook from NetGalley, William Morrow Books, and Scene of the Crime. My review is voluntary and unbiased.

My Rating: 🌟 🌟🌟🌟

Eden Hamilton had a twin in the womb, his name wad to be Eli, but he vanished. The doctors, James, everyone forgot him and acted like he never existed, but Lucy remembered. Lucy loves him and tries to keep his memory alive. Maybe at the expensive of her relationship with Eden.

This story starts with Eden’s accident, where she died, and according to Eli he came to life. Eli is so shifty and honestly so is Lucy. This story gives so much “everyone sucks here” vibes. It did keep me on my toes wondering what would happen next. I suspected some of ending, but the final POV in the last few pages blindsided me.

After nearly drowning, Eden wakes up at the hospital insisting she is now Eli, her twin brother that vanished in utero. Eden’s relationship with her mother Lucy has always been troubled and Lucy has never truly gotten over the death of Eli. Suddenly Eden is acting strange and Lucy suspects her husband is having an affair. Everyone is acting suspicious and the characters are unreliable.

I really enjoyed this read but feel like there were some plot holes through out the book. I needed a little more closure.

Lucy is relieved when her daughter Eden survives a near drowning. After recovering, Eden is claiming she is Eli - the twin that vanished as a fetus.

This was an interesting read that I wasn’t quite sure where it was going. There was a deep psychological component, going into the past and the effects upon the next generation. While the ending was quite a shock, I still had some questions at the end and would have enjoyed more of an explained wrap-up. Overall a great debut and I’ll read this author’s next work.

“There’s a fine line between love and hate. If there’s a line at all.”

My Name Was Eden comes out 2/27.

This was a fantastic debut. Part mystery, part drama this really captures the perils of parenting and what it means to be a good mother. I enjoyed the flashbacks into Lucy’s past which gave more insight into her character. I am still confused a bit about Charlie’s POV - I don’t know how necessary it was for the plot but it did provide an insight into the teenage mind. If you love a “be careful what you wish for” kind of plot then definitely check this one out!

I liked the premise of this book. Vanishing Twin Syndrome? The surviving twin is now in her teens, and she survives an accident. When she awakens, she takes on the persona of her departed sibling. This sounds like an interesting and exciting storyline. Why would she do this? Is someone playing with them?

Lucy was pregnant with twins but later discovered that only one of the twins survived. The other twin had been absorbed by the surviving twin. Fast forward fourteen years and now Eden is being dragged out of the water. There’s no brain injury, all tests and scans look good, she has survived! Everything is looking great until Eden tells them that she wants to be called Eli. What? Are you sure there is no brain injury? Eden now believes that she’s the dead brother that she absorbed in the womb.

When asked what happened to Eden, she calmly states that her heart stopped beating and she died. Perhaps this is not such a big deal and she’ll snap out-of-it but when Eden’s personality starts to change, then things get more complicated. So, what do you do? I started to question the other individuals in the story and wondered if they were all seeing the same thing. How were they reacting to this new event? I was getting confused as I read, and I have to say that the first half of the book was the best for me. I had to piece together the rest of the book for myself, to get some closure so that I could move on. 2.5 stars

I received a copy of this book from Scene of the Crime Early Read Program, William Morrow and Eleanor Barker-White in exchange for an honest opinion.

I am so thankful to William Morrow Books, Eleanor Barker-White, and NetGalley for granting me advanced digital and physical access to this twisty thriller before it's published on February 27, 2024.

My Name Was Eden by Eleanor Barker-White is a riveting psychological thriller that will hold the readers' attention from one end to another. With its richly drawn characters and deep suspense.
Right from the first chapter I was hooked and I needed to keep turning the pages…
I felt I was on the edge and my heart was bumping.

Thank You NetGalley and William Morrow for your generosity and gifting me a copy of this amazing eARC!

An implausible but compulsively readable novel. Lucy doesn't know what to make of her daughter Eden when, after almost drowning, she announces that she's Eli, her twin who died in utero-a vanishing twin. Lucy's got a lot going on in her life (there's marital problems with her husband James). Is she an unreliable narrator? How is her mental health? How about Eden/Eli's? And what about Eden's BFF Charlie, who knows some secrets. This leaves many things unresolved. Thanks to the publisher for the ARC. Over to others.

Short Synopsis:
I’m sure you’ve heard of vanishing twin syndrome - where one twin disappears or is absorbed in utero. This book is that. But make it creepy. And you can trust nobody.

My Thoughts:
The concept of this book was fantastic. I haven’t ever heard a good excuse about vanishing twin syndrome, so this was fun to explore that. But also it ended up being a bit too much for me. Too much death - especially in kids.

The last couple chapters and epilogue were great though. If you’re a fan of The Push, you’ll probably enjoy this one too.

Thank you to NetGalley and William Morrow for the ARC in exchange for an honest review, and thank you to BiblioLifestyle and William Morrow for the gifted finished copy.

After Lucy's daughter, Eden, survives a drowning incident, she wakes up in the hospital insisting that her name is Eli. Fourteen years ago, Lucy and her husband, James, found out they were having twins, but one of the twins vanished and was absorbed by the other twin, known as vanishing twin syndrome. Lucy is shocked when Eden starts calling herself Eli, the name that Lucy had reserved for the unborn twin. Lucy knows that something is wrong with Eden, who seems to be someone else entirely. Her stubborn teenage daughter is now laidback and even-tempered. Could Eden really be the twin who disappeared?

"My Name is Eden" will pull you in from the first page and keep you guessing until the final shocking conclusion. The story alternates between the POVs of Lucy (both past and present) and Eden's best friend, Charlie, giving a little more insight into Eden's personality before and after the drowning accident. I was immediately drawn to this book based on its creepy premise, and the first half of the book had me hooked. The second half was not as strong, but I still wanted to keep reading to find out what happened. Most of the story was wrapped up nicely in the epilogue, but I still had many questions and wanted to know what really happened to Eden in that pond. Overall, a strong debut from Eleanor Barker-White, who personally experienced vanishing twin syndrome, and I look forward to reading her future novels.