“There is no right way to grief”.

This is probably the hardest book review I’ve ever done. I had the opportunity to read an ARC and, since I’m going through grief right now, I thought it’d be a perfect piece to read. I was right, although that doesn’t mean everyone is ready to read it as early as I was. That’s something I’ve learnt with Mackintosh’s book: we have our own times on grief and that’s okay.

It’s been almost two months since I lost a loved one. It hasn’t been easy for me to read about death, but something about the author’s way of sharing her experience made me feel lighter, made me understand I’m not alone on this. During this journey, I’ve felt things I was ashamed of feeling, thinking I was being selfish or heartless. Thanks to Mackintosh’s book I know now it’s normal to go through all these mixed feelings, because grief takes the best of us and turn us into a version of ourselves we don’t recognise. It’s okay, it will pass.

This book helped me being less harsh on myself. I’ve learnt to give myself the space I need to miss him, to grief him, to cry all I need to cry. I’ve learnt it’s okay if one day I don’t have the strength to put on a smile and, when the time comes, it will be okay to feel happiness. It’s a long journey and I’ve just started it. I will be okay, someday.

This is a book I’m gonna recommend to anyone who’s lost somebody and needs a helping hand. It’s been really helpful for me because the author talks to you with respect, love and understanding. She says the right words, but she doesn’t pretend she has the ultimate truth about anything. She tells you her story and hopes her experience helps you with your own. It helped me, a lot.

Thanks, Claire, for writing this book and sharing it with us. I will never forget it, I will keep its words close to my heart forever.

I read "I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This" in one sitting. As I'm sure the author has been with other books, I was skeptical this one would offer platitudes or positive thinking or in some other way not reflect just how much grief can hurt. Instead, Clare Mackintosh writes an incredibly accessible and honest book I would recommend to anyone. For someone with fresh grief, this can truly be a book of promises to cling to when it feels like it will always hurt like this. For people further along the journey with grief, this book can offer reassurance that whatever they went through was normal, and that the ongoing ups and downs and new experiences of grief are also very normal. Although I am a person of faith, I also really appreciated that Mackintosh does not assume any specific belief system of her readers. Spirituality is often an area of crisis in the midst of grief, and too many books (and even more people) make that worse. I was also very impressed by how effectively Mackintosh made her grief relatable to those grieving very different losses.

Thank you to Sourcebooks and NetGalley for the privilege of reading a DRC of this book. All opinions are my own. I plan to buy a hard copy, recommend it to friends, and also check out Mackintosh's fiction writing!

This book is focused on the author's loss of a child and how she dealt with grief. It is moving and offers helpful observations. It's well written and honest. This book will be useful for many readers.

I’m certain I was not the intended audience for this title, at least not presently. While I am grateful to not be in need of this book at the moment, I found that it taught me to be more compassionate, patient and understanding - and therefore was absolutely worth reading. Thank you to the author Clare Mackintosh for your honesty, but also the protection of your family by sharing your story, not theirs. And thank you to Net Galley and Sourcebooks for the advanced copy.

When a great book, I could really relate to this book.Because i've lost people in the past. The hardest one was my cousin Carrie. She died in cancer at 27. And I can understand how you felt about your son, Alex . They deal with the grief Mary differently than I would have, but they seemed everybody seemed to move on.. People don't like to talk about death and dying.I love it puts interspective.How you want to die and what you want to do. You are afraid to show their motions around death. And this is why I liked your book. Because you talked about it in different stages.. It's hard when you lose somebody.I lost my brother in october but I was glad he died because he was suffering at the end. Some people don't understand why I couldn't cry anymore. Our family takes death in A whole different level. We do not mourn the death in my family but my cousins do. When my father died we just had a cream in it and that's up. I know people think this is a harsh way of looking at things but this is how we deal with grief. Like you said in the book, we have different levels of grief and how we remember them.. Especially like the time of the Christmas December 10th.Though that's a really nice tradition to celebrate your sons alex death. It's comforting for you and the children seem to accept it. This is what healthy families do they discuss things and to remember that person buy. I think when you're Very these emotions through death does not help anything. Unlike how your friend came over to help you. Just to talk about ordinary things. She knew you were upset. But that made you feel comfortable. Everybody has a way of dealing with grief. And I think by writing this book. You show how people it's a very healthy thing to get over people Who have died. I like how you pay tribute to alex and how certain parts of this book you could relate to things. You could imagine when he was 18.Driving a car going to college. I think this book would really help people who are struggling with the death somebody in the family. Life goes on, but you can always remember.Them so they're a song or going to the graveyard.

**Many thanks to NetGalley, SOURCEBOOKS, and Clare Mackintosh for an ARC of this book!**

Once in a while, a book comes along that catches you SO off guard with its honesty, its vulnerability, and its unabashed frank observations, that you can't help but fall in love with it on that basis alone...even if its content completely breaks your heart.

And this is precisely that sort of book.

Clare Mackintosh always approaches her writing with authenticity and openness, bringing a grounding sense of realism to all of her works of fiction. But in this book, self-help and self-reflection merge seamlessly, as Clare offers the reader 18 Assurances on Grief. As a mother who suffered the loss of a child (a child who passed at 5 weeks old, no less) Clare has not only experience as her teacher, but her own heart, soul, and perspective to share with the reader...and no matter how painful, how 'unflattering' she may find herself recounting some of the most difficult moments of her life...she never shies away from a single truth.

What started as a Twitter thread (with THOUSANDS of replies from people all over the world) blossomed into an emotionally heavy but powerfully hopeful read. The strength it took for Mackintosh to engage in such deep self reflection, to share such personal stories and achingly painful memories, but to also provide the AUTHENTIC acknowledgement about all aspects of grief, from its lowest, ugliest points to the promise that these moments WILL come, but will also morph and change is immeasurable. Although I have not experienced grief at the level she has (and I know this will only be a matter of time, because with age comes loss of those we love), I feel absolutely certain I will turn back to these pages for the solace, the camaraderie, and consolation Mackintosh so willingly offers to her readers

I cannot imagine how hard it was for Mackintosh to write this book, but we are ALL better off for it. I feel as though I know her on an entirely different level now, both as a mother AND a person, and I believe this John Green quote sums up precisely why: "Grief does not change you...it reveals you."

4.5 stars, rounded up to 5

This book was so well written and thoughtful. The author had experienced the situation of losing a child. This book will help you know that sometimes no words are needed just a hug. I definitely recommend this book for anyone.

This author’s name sounded so familiar when I downloaded the galley. As I started the first pages, I realized she is the author of several popular mystery/suspense books.

With her nonfiction debut, she goes deep into the nuances of grief. The subtitle of the book is 18 Assurances on Grief, and each chapter explores different promises about how essentially grief will not and cannot be your whole story but will always be part of it.

However, it’s not a personal development book; it’s a memoir, so she is speaking to specific feelings and coping mechanisms she is familiar with regarding grief after the loss of her five-week-old son.

It was a smart way to tell her story, as I was navigating alongside her with each changing emotion. And, several times during the story my heart sank for her, and sank for myself, as I applied it to my own grief experiences.

Mackintosh wrote on a truly difficult subject in a beautiful, tender way, and I’m glad she could explore her grief further during the writing process for this book.

Oh my word, this novel spoke to me. To avoid spoilers, chapter 7 and 12 resonated with me.

I was always a follower of Clare MacIntosh’s novels, and she’s displayed she can also write part memoir/part self help.

She wrote this novel with such vulnerability and honesty. You literally felt you were alongside with her while reading.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure if this novel would work for me. I typically only read grief novels by Alan D. wolfelt and David Kessler and Elisabeth Kubbler Ross; however, I Promise It Won’t Always Hurt Like This is up there with those grief experts novels.

I was struggling to read my regular historical fiction novels , but this novel came at the perfect time, as I was able to immerse myself in Clare’s story and promises. Talk about reading serendipity!

Highly recommend for anyone going through grief and loss.

Thank you to Cindy Burnett with the Thoughts From a Page podcast / Page Turners Patreon group for arranging ARC copies. Thank you to the publisher Sourcebooks ; the author; and Netgalley for an ARC in exchange for a review.

Beautifully written. This is part memoir about a woman dealing with the loss of her young son, but this is also a lesson in learning to understand grief in your life. At times raw and so very sad and at other times hopeful, this book had so many instances where a sentence would just leap out at me and I would have to put the book down to think about what I had just read. I know that this book will stick with me.

"This book is structured around a series of promises: my commitment to you is that the sun will rise again. It is a conversation, not a lecture; a story of hope, not of loss."

Wow. This book was so impactful. Whether you are struggling with grief or supporting someone in a state of grief, this is such an important read. So often, you hear platitudes of how it will get better in time, but this book shows how it does. I loved the personal stories Clare Mackintosh shared and how she dealt with the loss of her son. I read this book in small chunks because the subject matter was very serious, but I highlighted so many passages and am glad I read it.

Thank you to NetGalley and Sourcebooks for the digital ARC of this book.

I have had so much loss the last few years that I pretty much feel numb, but the simplest things will send me into a crying fit. I lost my dad 12 years ago, my youngest brother and mother late 2020, my sister in 2023, and my husband Nov. of 2023. Along with family losses there have been six close friends who have also passed in the last 3 years.

I feel like I will grieve for the rest of my life and in some ways, I believe we all do.

This book is such a warm, heartfelt read. It comes from the heart of one of my favorite thriller writers, and makes me understand how she is able to express so much emotion in her fiction stories. This is a book that I will reread many times. Infact, I plan to get the audio version because I love to have others read to me. This book really spoke to me and gives me hope that life with grief is possible.

Beautifully written book about the grieving process and how it affected the author. While everyone experiences grief differently, this book deals with the heart wrenching pain and finding hope and healing. I would recommend this book to everyone, especially if they are dealing with loosing a loved one.

Clare Mackintosh is one of my favorite authors and normally writes the best books that weaves a story that grips you from the start. This was something so different from her and it was extremely heartbreakingly raw to hear her tell the story of her losing her child at just five weeks. This is such a well written memoir with a lot of great information about how she dealt with the grief and moving forward.
There are 18 assurances in this book and each chapter will go through each one and how it applied to her and how it helped. Along with providing other items that helped her move on in her grief.

Thank you NetGalley and Sourcebooks for an ARC copy. Anyone that is dealing with grief in any way should purchase this book and see if it too will help.

This book was beautifully written and so vulnerable. I appreciated reading her journey with grief and her journey. I would definitely recommend for anyone going through grief whether it’s the same as Clare’s or different.

When I saw this book was available on NetGalley I really hesitated about picking it up. My husband had recently died and I was afraid it would be too much or too soon or a bad fit in some way. On the other hand, it seemed like it might be the exact right book at the exact right time. It was.

It helped me to see that I wasn't the only one absolutely undone by what I was experiencing. I really can not thank the author for taking the time and having the courage to put this down on paper. I will be grateful forever.

I received a free copy of, I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This, by Clare Mackintosh, from the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
This work reads like a hybrid of a memoir and self-help book.
The author shares very vivid accounts of her experience right alongside the progression of those feelings and how resolve/ dissipation/lessening or those feelings might occur on one's journey.
I appreciate the author sharing specific recall of certain feelings and the presentation of those emotions through day-to-day life.
Through this read, the language and tone used brought me to feel as though I was being spoken to directly.

“I Promise It Won’t Always Hurt Like This: 18 Assurances on Grief” was written by Clare Mackintosh. Clare lost her son 18 years ago and has gotten to a point in her grief where she can provide support for others who are navigating loss and grief. This excellent resource can be read multiple times based on where one is in their journey. This book is certainly not for everyone. However, the author gives excellent, heartfelt advice that can be used immediately or tucked away. Clare is honest about her experiences and grief itself. How one handles grief is not linear, and Clare gives readers permission to navigate their feelings the best way they can. Although she states forgetting is part of the grief process, Clare encourages those dealing with grief to hold onto the memories of those they've lost and maintain connections as much as they see fit. Grief is tough, and it may be hard to believe that it won't always hurt, but Clare reassures readers there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and they will make it to the other side.

"You got up. You found your footing again and you kept going."

Thank you, Clare Mackintosh, Sourcebooks, and NetGalley, for the e-ARC. Opinions expressed in this review are my own.

Clare Mackintosh is a fiction writer who lost her son 18 years ago. This is her personal grief journey written creatively into 18 promises or topics. You can read the book cover to cover, like I did, or choose promising subjects that appeal to where the reader is on their own grief journey. I found Clare's history and experience with grief, as well as her writing style to be very comforting. I cried plenty while reading this, but I also felt comfort and hope. Above all I felt completely understood and normal. This is a short book and I read it one chapter a day so as not to be overwhelming, as the topic of grief can often be for me. I am thankful she chose to share wisdom that worked for her.

I would recommend this book to anyone who has lost a loved one, should they be looking for such a resource. My biggest takeaway from this book, as well as my own experience, is how important it is to see or sit with people's grief. To allow it to be and not try to fix it. To listen and hear the stories of their loved ones. To ask their loved ones name. Most of all I know there is no timeline for grief and that people are walking around looking fine, but it is important to remember they might not be, and that empathy and acknowledgement goes a long way.

Thank you NetGalley and Sourcebooks for the ARC of this book in exchange for my honest review.

I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This
by Clare Mackintosh
Pub Date: 01 Mar 2024

Thank you #Sourcebooks and #NetGalley for an E-ARC of author Clare Mackintosh's book, " I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This ". This book is a very emotional topic, grief. Almost everybody has had some significant loss in their life, whether it would be loss of parent, spouse, child, friend or even the loss of a beloved pet.

Loss affects everybody differently. Clare describes her loss of her child, how it affected her, and what helped her get through it. It was very hard for me to read as I'm going through grief right now but it was very helpful. I would suggest anyone going through grief to read it when they are at a point they are ready to handle this subject.