e-ARC from Netgalley, all opinions are my own

This author is local to the library that I work at, and I had the book club I lead read this title for October. It was interesting to learn about the life of someone from Michigan who was adopted, and know that she settled nearby.

It's clear that the author did a lot of research not only into her personal background, but also about family members, context of where and when things in her life happened, and the places she references. However, I only liked this book and didn't love it. Part of this was because of the jarring way each section. chapter jumped around in time. There didn't seem to be smooth transitions throughout, and it wasn't always clear what period of time she was writing about at the beginning of a chapter.

I liked that each chapter began with a quote from her government file, that was interesting and unique. But the stories she told didn't necessarily endear her to me as a reader, nor to the members of my book club. To us, it reads as a list of reasons why she is the way she is, and there isn't a reason to change for the better.

This book had a fascinating true story to tell, but could have used editing to keep its focus and make it more thought-provoking. I can say that I really wanted to know what Patti's story was, but she gave too many details that were unnecessary and just filled out the narrative in a way that felt like a conversation where you just think, "get to the point!" Intriguing, but overall, not one I'd recommend.

"The Girl With Three Birthdays" is the story of what it meant for Patti Eddington to try and piece together the mystery of her birth and subsequent adoption. She always knew that she was adopted but what she didn't know was the history that brought her to that place, both her birth parents and her adoptive parents history.
Patti takes on a v complicated and at times, heart-wrenching, journey to discover her familial history. The time line of the story isn't linear, in many ways it felt spiral, as she learns more she tracks back more, always with compassion towards the people involved. It is also a story of what it means to discover a family that you didn't necessarily know that you had. The author's sense of humor is also a strong under-current throughout the story, often lending a feeling of "I'll be alright" to some of the more poignant moments in the book.
Overall a well balanced, graceful and at times very funny memoir on what it means to go in search of your history.

Thank you Netgalley for the ARC of this book. This wasn't quite what I expected but I enjoyed it. The story wasn't as crazy as I had hoped but still well paced and easy to read.

Thank you #Netgalley for the copy!

Wow! The author, Patti, always knew she was adopted and loved her parents deeply. But as she became an adult, some things started to not add up, first being that her parents let it slip that they changed her birthday when they adopted her, so it would be harder to find her. After that moment, Patti began to question so many things in life and during covid she decided to unlock her adoption records to learn more. At first she read some things that were very disappointing. But when she does a genetics swab, she is connected to new family members who help her better understand her upbringing. Very interesting read!

The promise of family secrets and that title make for compelling reading. The actual story isn't as scandal-ridden as you might think, but the tone is very conversational and easy to read. A pleasant tale with solid pacing.

This was not the kind of book I expected. This happens to me a lot, so it is not something I should start a review with, but I can’t help myself. The author talks of her adoption and her late search for her birth family.

The first thing that stuck with me and lingered for almost the entirety of the book was that the author’s mother did not come across as a nice person. She is described as a larger-than-life person but I couldn’t get past all the other stories we are told.

There is no set format to the story, although it is written well. The author is a writer and this comes across in the language and narrative style, but her past is given to us in different parts, sometimes going back and forth in time.

That said, only one of the secrets that the author manages to figure out about her adoption has more to it than the others. It is a well told and very personal narrative, but I might not have been the audience for this book. I think I wanted to read it because of the cover and the title leading me to assume some things about the content ( which obviously was not what I got from it).

I think this book would work better for people familiar with the setting.

I received an ARC thanks to Netgalley and the publishers but the review is entirely based on my own reading experience.

In the 1960s, a closed adoption was all that usually happened, so there was no question of Patti finding out about her life before she was an Eddington. After a happy childhood, she starts connecting with family members from her earlier life through the results of a DNA test on an ancestry site.

The more Patti finds out about her life before her adoption, the more it leaves her with questions about the truths she accepted from the only people she ever knew as her parents. As her discoveries are all made after their deaths, Patti is left to connect the dots herself.

The story is told in an engaging manner that presents most of the character’s motivations as understandable. Since Patti learned more details of her past as an adult, she has the perspective and maturity to make sense of some choices that, in retrospect, may not have been in everyone’s best interests.

Overall, this was a quick read and an interesting memoir that tells of a life and experiences unique to this entertaining author. It earned 4 out of 5 stars and would be recommended to those who enjoy family dramas with a non-conventional spin.

Thank you to the author, She Writes Press and NetGalley, for an ARC in exchange for an honest review. My apologies for the delay in posting this review, I had a bit too much going on.

This memoir was a interesting and heartwrenching, but I found the author's search for her true identity got a bit lost in all the details of both her adopted family and her biological family. So many stories , and so many different family members - I had trouble keeping them all straight and longed for more of a spotlight for the author's personal story.

I absolutely loved this memoir. It has everything I look for when I'm reading this genre - emotion, suspense, questions, longing for understanding. Eddington's writing style grasped me from the very first page, her prose are absolutely beautiful. Each sentence felt like it held such power. Along with that, the way Eddington told her story from the beginning was extremely engrossing. I kept wanting to understand the "why" (not trying to spoil anything here!).

Getting to know Eddington's biological and adoptive families was interesting and the dichotomies between these two families was also compelling to read about. It is one of the first memoirs I read where the focus of the story is adoption and I can say that Eddington has really made me want to read more!

Eddington may not have all the answers to her questions, but being beside her on her journey in this book has been a privilege.

This was fascinating. Definitely a read for a very particular kind of audience. The story is interesting. Intriguing. Heartbreaking and Hopeful great memoir. But I did find that the descriptions were to0 detailed at times. But overall, this was a good memoir.

This book was interesting but a little choppy. I would probably understand it more if there was a timeline included in the end as well as a family tree to keep everyone straight.

A nice enough story but there was a bit too much backstory rather than focus on the actual experience of adoption and being an adoptee for me.

My thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC of this book.

Round up to 3.5 stars

This was definitely an interesting story, however, the uniqueness of it got somewhat lost in all the familial details. Between her adopted family and her biological family, there were a LOT of stories and so the author's search for her true identity almost took a backseat. Additionally, there were so many different family members mentioned, that I think the book would have benefitted from a family tree at the front that the reader could refer to while reading the various anecdotes. Overall, I didn't dislike the book, but I would not necessarily recommend it either.

I loved this memoir! It was interesting on many levels: the adoption side of the story and also the time frame with Patti's parents being older adoptive parents - a very different generation! I laughed and felt sad for her throughout the story. 4 stars!

Thank you Netgalley for the advanced reader!

When I read the summary of this book, I was intrigued by the story of adoption and discovering her life before her adoption. Three birthdays for one girl also drew my attention.

I felt that the story ending up being interesting, but the authors story bounces around a lot and makes things confusing.

It was hard to keep my attention and I honestly would have stopped reading, if I didn’t want to know the whole story. It just didn’t seem like we were going to get to it, as the author bounces around to stories that don’t seem prevalent to what she was saying before she starts to telling a story about someone else.

I hope the publisher and editors work on the flow of the story, before the publishing date. This was written more in a conversational style, which doesn’t read well for a book.

#NetGalley #ARC I appreciate Net Galley’s opportunity to read an Advance Readers Copy of this book. I wish this author much success.

My best friend has an incredible adoption story and I find that my interest in this topic has grown through her. I was excited to read The Girl with Three Birthdays based on the description of a shocking adoption story. While the author's story was interesting, her writing was almost unreadable. The story was all over the place. The book editors should have done a better job of tightening up her writing so there was some sort of cohesiveness and logical order. Unfortunately, the author's story was lost behind some poor writing.

Adopted as a toddler in 1963, Patti Eddington grew up knowing that the parents who'd raised her were not her biological mother and father, but she never felt particularly curious about the woman who gave birth to her, and the tidbits she learned over the years about half-siblings and potential fathers were more irritating and confusing than tantalising. It is only decades later - as a middle aged woman with a daughter of her own - that Patti decides to find out what she can about her origins and how she came to be the daughter of Jim and Millie Eddington.

Eddington's story is undoubtedly a memoir, but it is also part local and social history; it is a fascinating snapshot of small town Michigan in the second half of the twentieth century, a detailed portrait of a couple whose approach to parenting was shaped by growing up during the Depression, and a thoughtful examination of how the practice of adoption has evolved, and the wide-reaching impact it can have on all families involved.

The title (The Girl With Three Birthdays: An Adopted Daughter's Memoir of Tiaras, Tough Truths and Tall Tales) is misleading in this sense, and readers who pick up this book hoping for lurid details, scandal and betrayal will be disappointed. This book, however, is far better: it is enlightening, moving and relatable. I would argue that The Girl With Three Birthdays is chiefly a love letter to Eddington's adored parents. Her feelings for them shine throughout the text - from funny anecdotes to touching stories about their loyalty to their family and the difference they made to their community. Eddington does a remarkable job of bringing her parents to life, and I felt her grief deeply at their passing. She has a real gift for capturing people she knows with humour and warmth; I found her depictions of her long-lost Aunt Eva and beloved godmother Aunt Dorothy truly beautiful, and her words genuinely moved me to tears several times.

Some aspects of Eddington's story are difficult to follow; the timeline jumps backwards and forwards a lot, making it challenging to understand the order in which events happen, e.g. when she was formally adopted, when she reconnected with various members of her biological family. Because of this non-linear timeline, I didn't initially realise that her parents had both passed away by the point at which Eddington begins to establish relationships with some of her biological parents' relatives. On the whole though, I enjoyed the way Eddington wove in stories from her own parents' childhoods as she told her story.

A memorable story, beautifully told. Thank you to NetGalley and She Writes Press for the opportunity to read and review an ARC of this book.

Leaning towards a 1.5 for this.

Yes, Patti's story is interesting, however her writing style wasn't for me.
The style felt really messy. There was no real flow to it, which made it so hard for me to get into it.

I do really love the cover for this book though.

I had trouble getting into this book and did not finish. The writing style wasn't really for me. Maybe I will give it a try sometime in the future.