Eddington grew up knowing that she was adopted but she never knew the details behind why. Was she taken from her mother or did her mother give her up? Her adopted family didn’t really talk about it and because she loved her parents so fiercely, she never asked many questions for fear that she would hurt their feelings. Later in life when she was gifted a DNA test from her own daughter, Eddington discovered a whole new slew of information and, along with it, formed a whole new slew of questions about her life, her identity, and what she thought she knew.

Readers gain a lot of backstory about Eddington’s adoptive parents and, while entertaining to read, I didn’t find it particularly related to what the synopsis of the book says it’s about—her adoption—other than to let readers know that she grew up in a very loving family. I found myself dying to get to the part about her adoption story and the discovery of her third birthday which really didn’t come until about half way through the book.

I would say that the description is slightly misleading because while it is about her adoption and her three birthdays, it is almost more so a love letter to the people that raised her. Not a bad thing but worth mentioning.

Thank you NetGalley for my digital copy. Out 05/07/2024

Note: Thank you to NetGalley, She Writes Press, and Patti Eddington for the advanced reader copy of the book. This review will also be posted on my blog and portions on Goodreads. What follows is my unbiased review of the book.

As I’ve been reading more and more memoirs by people adopted around the same time I was, I’m finding many common experiences and feelings, even as the stories are different. In the case of author Patti Eddington, her story is one of the reasons I don’t agree with some of the more militant adoption voices out there. Sometimes birthmothers and birthfathers were wronged; they were lied to and told just about anything to get them to sign away their parental rights to the child. In others, you have people who can’t or won’t parent, and what follows is what is in the best interests of the child.

"Patti Eddington always knew she was adopted, and her beloved parents seemed amenable enough to questions—but she never wanted to hurt them by expressing curiosity, so she didn’t. The story of her mother cutting off and dying her hair when she was a toddler? She thought it was eccentric and funny, nothing more. When she discovered at fifteen that her birthday wasn’t actually her birthday? She believed it when her mother said she’d changed it to protect her from the “nosy old biddies” who might try to discover her identity."

That description intrigued me. I get upset when trying to learn the truth about peoples’ own history is cast in the light of hurting someone else. Reading the book, it seems no one actually said this to Patti, and her parents were truly supportive, but it’s a burden society places on those who are adopted. However, as the book goes on, it becomes apparent that if Patti had been able to have an honest dialogue with her parents, a lot of hurt and misunderstanding could have been avoided later on.

Patti grew up very loved. Her parents loved her. They were older when they adopted her, and her life was nice in a rural Michigan town with her father working for Oldsmobile and tending a small farm. Her mother was a housewife and a bit eccentric at times, and I saw some of my own mother in her. That German background runs deep.

Like me, as well, Patti thought it was pretty special to be adopted until society told her differently. She stood out among the kids at school and was prone to be bullied, despite her father being on the school board, or maybe that was part of it. Even with that, she loved the life she had growing up. The stories she tells are those present in many families, of funny moments that probably didn’t seem all that funny at the time, and a deep love, even if it wasn’t always expressed.

Patti was the youngest of five children removed from her mother’s custody due to neglect. Actually, Patti (then Mary Ann) was with her biological father’s family when she was removed. The stories she had been told over the years were rooted in truth, but not the whole truth. She had three different dates for when she was born in the end, and some semblance of the truth. How she got there is both heartwarming and heartbreaking.

The book reads very well. I actually finished it in one day on a cross-country flight, which is something I rarely do these days. It’s a story of a simple life in many way, but also one that is complicated by the things that could not be shared at the time Patti was growing up. It’s a snapshot of a time and place that doesn’t exist any more.

I felt The Girl With Three Birthdays was a great book that really advocates for honesty in the adoption process, rather than secrets and lies that surround it. Honesty could have prevented the hurt Patti felt as she put the pieces of her life together. Honesty might have also helped her parents deal with the insecurities they felt around the child they adopted.

Engaging and multifaceted, Eddington's memoir proves to be a captivating narrative that seamlessly interweaves various themes. The author's commendable candor in sharing her personal journey adds an intriguing layer to the narrative, evoking a range of emotions from heartbreak to hope. Eddington adeptly navigates the complexities of her life and that of her families, offering a unique perspective on adoption that extends beyond conventional boundaries. Notably, the memoir unfolds from three distinct viewpoints, a narrative technique that proves both novel and effective.

Eddington's prose is articulate and accessible, rendering the memoir a compelling and digestible read. The uncertainty surrounding the story's conclusion adds an element of suspense, maintaining the reader's interest throughout. The book's scope is expansive, encompassing a myriad of topics such as adoption, family dynamics, health. Moreover, certain portions of the narrative shed light on historical events previously unfamiliar to the reader, contributing an educational dimension to the memoir. In sum, Eddington's memoir is an enlightening exploration that seamlessly blends personal reflection with broader cultural and historical contexts.

I wasn’t a fan of this book. I found it too dry and the writing style confusing (it jumps around a lot from topic to topic, time period to time period), and it just made for a less than engaging memoir. I appreciate the author’s emotional journey in discovering her roots, but it wasn’t a narrative that I found particularly interesting unfortunately.

Having been given the joy of being an advanced reader I can say this is worth getting when it comes out! I enjoyed the story and really felt for her. My own birthday is coming up and it was timely. Not knowing all of yourself is… well scary.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the Kindle ARC. I'm so glad I requested and received this book! I was concerned that since it was a non-fiction book of an adoption story that it would be tragic and sad. While very thoughtful and touching, The Girl with Three Birthdays is anything but traumatic. The fact that Patti was adopted was never hidden from her but some of the details and her date of birth were a bit jumbled. Her adoptive parents, The Eddingtons, by all accounts were wonderful people. Patti didn't become interested in finding her birth family until some discrepancies in her birth records were discovered. She always felt that there was a reason her adoptive parents didn't tell her every detail but chooses not to look into it until later in life. Some of her stories of growing up and being a misfit are funny and sweet. Patti's story is relatable even to those who were not adopted.

I'm a huge fan of long lost family and the impact adoption has on both the child and the parents so I was very interested to read Patti's story.

The style was easy to follow and although the timeline was far from linear, that didn't hamper the underlying story, I think it was evidence of how the author's knowledge of her origins impacted on the events of her life.

An interesting memoir which is balanced in its approach,

I really wanted to get into this book but the writing was so disjointed. I didn't like the hoping back and forth and coming from subject and changing timelines.

So I keep reading the blurb over and over, I guess I was expecting something completely different because this didn't go in the direction I thought. There really wasn't anything to this, it was just somebody's autobiography? There were times I just didn't think it was going anywhere, something was mentioned and then it went in a totally different direction.

I got a free copy of this amazing book for an honest review. My nieces are adopted. I have always had an interest in adoption. This book is a wonderful read.

The author talks about her life and her families life. It's a book about adoption but so much more. The book talks about the author life, her adopted parents and families life and her biological family. I don't think I have ever read anything from three perspectives. It worked so well

The book is well written. It is easy to read. It is fascinating. I didn't know how the story would end

The book covers almost everything. The book is about adoption, family, health, dying, career, school, youth, covid 19, fertility, illness, religion, and more. There are portions, in the book, that I learned about some historical events that I had not heard of before.

I am so glad I had the opportunity to read this amazing book. Now I need to read more from this author.

I received a copy of "The Girl With Three Birthdays" from Netgalley. Patti Eddington wrote this memoir. When she was born she was taken from her birth mother. She was adopted as a baby and raised by loving parents. She always knew she was adopted but when she was fifteen she found out she had a different birth date. She has celebrated her birthday on a day in November to find out she had a different birthday. Patti had only been told a tiny part of how she was put up for adoption but because of the court documents are sealed she knew very little.
She grew up in a small town and came to Lansing to begin college. First at Lansing community college than on to MSU. she writes of the jobs she had in Lansing while attending college. On a personal view I enjoyed reading this part since I grew up in the Lansing Mi. area and knew of the area well. so when she said she worked in Frandor at Greens I found that pretty neat since I would have been working at Sears that was also in Frandor at the same time. lol!
Patti went to to describe her life over the years and sharing she took an ancestry. com test that led her to biological relatives. She soon learned more about her biological genes and met some relatives that were still alive. sadly her bio mother and Father and passed. on. She did get to learn more about her roots one was finding out her bio father was Mexican heritage. Since I am an adopted person myself I always find it of interest to read about other people who are adopted and have found their roots. A good read. I would give this a 4.5.

I suppose I should start out by saying that, while I don't know the author personally, her husband cleans my greyhound's teeth. I don't feel that this makes me a particularly biased reviewer (even if he is an excellent dog dentist), but do with that information what you will. I'd been seeing mentions of Patti's book on the vet clinic's Facebook page for a while and was super excited to see it pop up on NetGalley.

My tenuous connection to the author aside, however, I'm also an adoptive parent and so I was interested in reading about the experiences of an adoptee who grew up not all that far from where we currently live.

And, well, The Girl with Three Birthdays was an intriguing read. It's a quiet, meandering story, with stories of her childhood and parents' lives intertwined with the details of her adoption. Patti's story is both sweet and a little sad at the same time – it's obvious that she was loved dearly by both of her adoptive parents, but even happy adoption stories are unavoidably filled with some sense of loss.

I'm not really sure how you go about rating and reviewing a memoir as personal as this one, to be honest. I don't feel as if it's my place to judge someone else's personal experiences (except for you, Tucker Max – you totally deserved that one-star review). But I can say that it's well-written and the author and her family sound like wonderful people. Ted was a real jerk, though.

As a Michigander, I recognized lots of the places mentioned in this book, which was an interesting experience. There aren't a whole lot of books – memoirs, fiction, or otherwise – set in West and Mid-Michigan, so that was kind of fun. And, of course, seeing my hound's dentist repeatedly mentioned in a book was a new experience for me!

So, yeah. If you enjoy adoption memoirs, you'll likely enjoy this one. Definitely give it a read.

Many thanks to NetGalley and She Writes Press for providing me with an advance copy of this book to review.

At first I was skeptical reading it, as I'm not a big memoir reader but I've never read a memoir that kept me at the edge of my seat till the last page!! This is a beautifully weaved story, 5 stars truly well earned!!

Fascinating story. Intriguing. Heartbreaking. Hopeful. I applaud Eddington for sharing her story. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC. I love adoption books and this one was in depth and well written. Five stars.