This is possibly my favorite book of this year. It was incredible. I loved the story, the characters, and the resolution. We change a lot but when we return to previous places its hard to show how much we have changed. Anyone who has experienced a change and reunion of some sort will find solace in this book.

This book was a ROLLER COASTER.

I was rolling at all these people hooking up at this college reunion 😂.

I felt like the characters were relatable, the MC Charlotte especially.

I did get a little put off at first that Charlotte felt like she wasn’t as successful as her friends because she was in an administrative support role and not in the art field like she’d planned. Anyone who’s ever been an admin KNOWS they work their asses off and it’s not a position to be looked down upon and instead to be proud of.

HOWEVER, Charlotte’s particular situation was infuriating and the last like 10% of the book I was so full of rage on her behalf and was so happy for her in the end. She was lucky to have a support system regardless of whether she realized it or not in the beginning.

This book was heavy at times, but ended with hope. And that’s always my favorite. We need that sometimes.

Overall, I enjoyed reading this, it became more of a romance than I was expecting, very focused on Charlotte’s relationship with Reece. Sometimes it felt a little cringe because it felt totally cliche to hook up with the ex at the reunion, but he was just so NICE, so wholesome, so good for Charlotte. So it was all fine.

Thank you @netgalley and @duttonbooks for sending this book for review consideration. All opinions are my own.

This book was fine, but unfortunately nothing to write home about! I found myself skimming through the end to be done with it, as I wasn't super invested with the plot or characters.

I was hoping I would love this one because I'm always a fan of LGBTQIA+ and Mental Health representation in novels, but I wanted more from Charlotte as an MC. There were points where she felt like a caricature of her identity, which can be draining and disappointing for anyone who is hoping to relate to a diverse story.

However, if you're looking for a low-stakes romance, you may enjoy it! I'd recommend taking a look at other reviews, as it could just be me who was bored.

3.5 stars. I found this to be enjoyable enough, however, I found the main character to be frustrating at times. I appreciate the anxiety representation, however her constant wishywashiness with the love interest was frustrating and immature.

I thoroughly enjoyed this story about Charlotte returning to her alma mater for the five year reunion. She’s been busting her ass at a job in New York, being an executive assistant for a problematic, misogynistic, narcissist who will also be giving the commencement speech at graduation at the same school. Worlds are colliding. Not only is Charlotte’s heinous boss going to be at her college that weekend too, but she’s reuniting with her friends–who she hasn't kept entirely in the loop on how miserable she currently is–and she is definitely running into not one, but two college exes. Yikes. It explores some dark themes, like surviving abuse and confronting your abuser, how that impacts your future relationships and self-worth, in a way that is so real and heartbreaking.

thank you netgalley for the e-arc. i can always appreciate when there are many, many characters but each of them have their own personality that you can keep track of and dawson was able to do this very well. i think this book will do well with audiences from between just recently out of college and maybe up until the age of when that becomes nostalgic. the dialogue was something i took note of, it was mostly of substance and not much filler like small talk stuff.

instant 5 star read!!! i love messy bisexuals, i felt so seen and heard and loved and held through every page <3

I enjoyed But How Are You, Really. It was a relatable story. I liked the main character and the storyline. The climax of the conflict with her shitty boss was satisfying. I would recommend picking it up. The romance part of the book was okay too but I cared more about the main character and what she was going through than I did that.

Ella Dawson does a great job showing the in-between state of leaving college and not fully feeling like you've got your life on track. I could relate to Charlotte's disappointment in her current lot in life and her fear that everyone is doing better than her. This felt like a second-coming-of-age story mixed with some romance.

* I received an ARC of this book from NetGalley. Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for this book. All thoughts are my own.

This book is more character driven than plot driven and I don’t typically enjoy character driven books as much. I do think the author did this well because the character is really annoying at the beginning and she ends up being somebody that you’re rooting for at the end. I just think it took too long for me to want to pick the book back up and get into it each time I did read it, so I can’t rate it any higher than 3 stars. We also get introduced to a lot of side characters and I would’ve really enjoyed some of their POV’s.

Overall, I do think people will enjoy this book especially if you love a character story. So I would recommend it to that group of people.

Love seeing representation for messy depressed bisexuals. Possibly felt a bit too seen with the shitty parents. Great found family. Pleasantly surprised by the sex scenes.

Thanks to Penguin and Netgalley for this advanced copy!

This was such a fun tale of a 5 year college reunion and one woman's attempt to come to terms with where she's at in her life. I loved the messiness of Charlotte Thorne because it felt authentic and natural. Her friend group and the way they interacted reminded me of my own friends and I appreciated how Dawson wrote so many different types of characters, having them be architypes while not having them be stale or charactures. And the ending felt so fantastic! I won't spoil it but, I LOVED it.

So much fun, so much fun. I can't wait for the next book!

I just want to thank Dutton and NetGalley for the eARC of But How Are You, Really. I was so so excited to get this eARC but it fell really short for me. It's taken me a bit longer to read. I find myself struggling with reading books with longer chapters, and this book has exactly that. I read 2 chapters of the book and was already on 20% of the book.

I felt as if the book was just too wordy and there definitely could have been less explaining in the book. The writing was good but there wasn't really much of a plot and it just felt a bit like chaos reading. The pacing is just a bit off but the storyline of the book would have been great if there wasn't so much words to the story.

Class reunions would be my worst nightmare. I'm so thankful we haven't done one. Because I'd 100% be like Charlotte. I totally understood her feeling of having to pretend. These illusions about how our lives are going, the social media edit, that comes up during a reunion. When we all talk about how great our life is going, when there doesn't seem to a moment for vulnerability. And for Charlotte, she also has these deep seated moments of wondering if this career is even for her, if she's moving on the right path. Talk about relatable?

A NEW FAVORITE EVERYONE!!!

Was this perfect? No, but it was perfect to ME. This is the story high school me needed when she felt alone in understanding her sexuality and feared the expansiveness of her future. This is the story college me needed when she realized she hated adult life and had to make changes to her life. The narrative is honest, funny, painful, hopeful and spot on. I annotated pretty much every page of it because I saw my thoughts and feelings reflected in Charlotte's. It was scary, I felt called out! We've all been in her place and can relate to how hard it is to like yourself when you don't truly know what you want.
To capture such difficult feelings so candidly is an impressive feat from Dawson, as a debut author! I loved almost everything about it: Charlotte, the authenticity of her friendships, campus vibes, the reality of sexism and toxicity in corporate America, LGBTQ+ representation (!!!), the trauma of abusive relationships... I could sing Ella Dawson's praises for hours. REESE?! Protect this man at all costs because his patience for and belief in Charlotte had me in a puddle on the floor. My only complaint is that it wasn't more of a slow burn, but I concluded this actually stays true to Charlotte's emotional instability and makes me feel for her. VERY realistic for a survivor of an abusive relationship.
Tackling so many heavy themes should be impossible but in this book, it all works together so damn well. This is not just another campus novel and Charlotte is not just another infuriatingly-conflicted-20-something. She is raw and real; she is me, I am she. And the bi representation is the best I've ever read. All of the queer rep, really, especially in her friendship dynamics. Found family at its finest! Her friends are not just convenient side characters, they all had huge personalities and beautiful arcs. I keep thinking about them all and that's how you know a story has real meaning.
This should be required reading and I know for a fact that this will heal something in anyone who has struggled in their identity and place in the world. Dawson has created something that both destroys and comforts you; it will have a lasting impact on our generation.

Content Warnings: Abusive relationships (Intimate & Work); Mental Health Issues (Depression, PTSD, Trauma)

Dawson's novel of a burnout, bisexual Millenial who attends a 5 year reunion and navigates her nostalgia-and-mistakes of the past with her not-as-she'd-hoped present will probably be a read others enjoy, but it didn't land right for me. What I did enjoy in the novel was the numerous, supportive friendships, diversity, and overall growth of our main character. However, I'm not a huge romance person, so a lot of the plot being focused on rekindling a lost relationship wasn't my cup of tea. There is also a great deal of nostalgia for a very specific type of college experience that I did not have, even though I match the age group of the characters depicted.

If the blurb sounds good to you, I'd recommend reading it. Just because it didn't jive with me doesn't mean you or others won't enjoy it.

But How Are You, Really by Ella Dawson is a perfect fit for readers who crave a heartwarming and relatable exploration of millennial burnout, queer identity, and second chance romance, with a strong focus on chosen family and coming-of-age themes that will resonate deeply with fans of contemporary romance and LGBTQIA+ literature. **This is from the @Storygraph preview**

I found this book from the author on Threads and immediately connected with the main character!
Charlotte Thorne is headed back to her 5 year college reunion! Not only is she attending as an alumnus, she is also working all weekend, as her boss is the commencement speaker at the end of the weekend. We follow along as Charlotte navigates old relationships with new views on the world.

I loved this book! I have to say that this book hit me in all the right places. I connected with the main character and all of those around her. I loved that everyone had their own story to follow along with.

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

A good coming of age, romance read, it was very relatable. There were a ton of tough topics here. It gave me a ton of emotions this character is going through a lot, and sadly it made me like her and then not lol. But I love a good second chance romance.

Loved that it was a quick read! Definitely a coming of age story with life lessons on love, regret, and hustle culture. Charlotte’s character development was impressive and noticeable from start to finish. I loved the friendships formed in the book and I almost wish it had been written with multiple POVs!

This was my official Pride month read. Its twentysomething quarter life crisis to healthy choices was exactly what I needed to remind myself that the work is not done. Kudos to Ella Dawson.

Thank you to PENGUIN GROUP Dutton | Dutton and NetGalley for providing an eARC for a honest review.