This was a STUNNING read. Dark and lyrical and emotional and raw, it deals with mental illness, trauma, and grief in viscerally vulnerable and truthful ways. I will be thinking about this book for years.

Please Stop Trying to Leave Me is an unfiltered, often chaotic dive into the mind of Norma, a woman grappling with love, trauma, and an unraveling sense of reality. The novel’s structure—blending therapy sessions, fragmented memories, and fictionalized retellings of her past—creates an intentionally disorienting experience that won’t work for every reader. At times, the rawness feels deeply authentic; at others, it teeters on being impenetrable. The writing is sharp and compelling, but the narrative’s unpredictability, along with its heavy subject matter, makes it a difficult but thought-provoking read.

This book is an absolute gem. Alana Saab has a rare gift for capturing the messy, intricate workings of the mind in a way that feels both deeply personal and universally relatable. The blend of stream-of-consciousness, raw reflections, fragmented dialogues, and storytelling creates an immersive experience that feels fresh, intimate, and profoundly human.

Norma’s journey struck a chord with me in ways I didn’t expect—it was one of those books I had to put down just to sit with for a while, not because I lost interest, but because I needed time to process how much it resonated. The weight of Oblivion, the echoes of her past, and the delicate, intentional way Alana weaves it all together made this story feel like both a mirror and a revelation. A new all-time favorite, and an absolute must-read!

I'm torn on how I felt about this book. There were certain vignettes that I found insightful, lyrical, and lovely. On the other hand, the stream of consciousness therapy sessions got tedious pretty quickly. While Norma's flaws are kind of the whole point of the book, it was very grating to read after a while and I didn't feel like I was able to emotionally connect with her as a character. I wonder if this would have worked better with just the story excerpts? I also found the ending to be a satisfying and sweet conclusion.

I didn't expect to like this book so much. When I first started it, I noticed it has a stream of consciousness writing style, something I'm not usually a big fan of. Norma is a young aspiring author living in NYC with her girlfriend, who has been struggling with depression, which she calls "oblivion". After a very bad breakdown, she decides to study her oblivion with the help of a new therapist. Since she is a writer, she shares stories with her therapist that are clearly autofiction, where her therapist takes a lot of context from Norma's life. Even when Norma has lived a very privileged life, she has struggled with mental illness for most of it, some caused for significant trauma from her early years. I found this book to be very informative and entertaining, sometimes funny with the political rant, but also relatable on how sometimes anxiety takes over our thoughts in this modern world. There is also a remarkable ending, a chapter written in her girlfriend's POV, where we see Norma through the lens from someone who really loves and cares for her. I know I will be thinking about this book for a very long time.

I felt the narrator was unlikable and not in a good way. this was maddning to read and took me forever because i would read a chapter and wouldn’t be able to pick it back up again for days.

I found this book difficult to read. It wasn't super engaging, and I couldn't really connect with any of the characters.

Please Stop Trying to Leave Me is a deeply engrossing, frenetic, and thought-provoking debut by Portuguese-Lebanese-American writer and screenwriter Alana Saab (she/her).

The story is narrated by Norma, a twenty-seven-year-old, privileged young woman living in present-day New York in the wake of a mental health breakdown. Described by Saab as “experimental”, the novel unfolds over eight months of Norma’s therapy sessions, which are interspersed with short stories from her manuscript. In therapy, Norma explores the “oblivion” that has plagued her since childhood. Though Norma previously only ebbed in and out of oblivion, she now finds herself stuck in it, unable to finish her manuscript and overwhelmed by the signs she believes God is sending her to break up with her girlfriend.

Early in the book, Norma’s therapist diagnoses her with major depressive disorder, depersonalization/derealization disorder, and immense anxiety. Norma’s therapist surmises that Norma is projecting meaning onto her external environment (i.e., signs from God that she should break up with her girlfriend) so that she does not have to do the internal work of reflection. Norma’s therapist believes that this is likely because Norma has experienced significant trauma.

Reading Please Stop Trying to Leave Me was an immersive experience. As someone who struggles with anxiety, Saab’s writing was so authentic that I had to put the book down several times to stop myself from getting swept up in Norma’s chaotic energy. Saab displayed such a high-level understanding of mental health issues and the ways in which they manifest that I was not at all surprised to learn she has a Masters in Psychology. It was also really refreshing that Saab wrote with such unflinching honesty about not only Norma’s traumas, but the reality of being in a healthy adult relationship, including the fact that ambivalence is a normal part of every relationship, romantic or otherwise.

My favorite short story from Norma’s manuscript was “Fertile Ashes”, wherein she charted her main character’s lifelong coming out journey and compared the art of fearlessly choosing for ourselves to the self-immolation and rebirth of a phoenix. I also really enjoyed how clever and incisive Norma was throughout the novel. No matter how heavy the subject matter, she managed to bring levity–whether she was criticizing the arrangement of the pillows on her therapist’s couch or cursing out Joe Biden for lying to the American people and upsetting her girlfriend.

Saab is a masterful storyteller. Although I found Please Stop Trying to Leave Me difficult to get through at times, it was only because Saab had so expertly crafted Norma’s world that its chaos was palpable. I wholeheartedly recommend this book to anyone who’s ever wondered about how the mind works of someone who struggles with depression, anxiety, or dissociation, and to anyone who believes in the healing properties of writing.

Saab lives in New York with her partner. She teaches writing workshops to survivors of domestic violence, human trafficking, and sexual assault through the non-profit Here There and Everywhere. She also mentors incarcerated writers with PEN America’s Prison Writing Program. You can find Saab on Instagram at @alana.saab.

Trigger warnings for discussions of mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and depersonalization/derealization disorder; recreational and prescription drug use; child sexual abuse; suicidal ideation; and graphic detail of a medical procedure.

Norma, an aspiring queer writing living in New York CIty has a break down and starts to see a therapist where she immediately gets diagnosed with Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder, depression, anxiety and panic attacks and is immediately put on medication.

This book has such amazing and relatable mental health rep and I loved how it's told over a number of months as Norma relates to a series of different therapists how being on the medication is affecting her love life and relationship, the way the state of the world itself is frightening and anxiety-inducing (and frankly she'd be worried if people weren't worried by it).

She also talks a lot about her works in progress and what they look like and eventually shares about past family trauma that no doubt has given her PTSD. Great on audio narrated by a fav of mine, Barrie Kreinik and highly recommended for fans of books like Adelaide by Genevieve Wheeler.

Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy and @prhaudio for a complimentary ALC in exchange for my honest review!

I featured this book in a new release video prior to publication and was very excited to read about someone struggling with depersonalization. The description promises a mind bending narration style as well as a lot of emotional punches. I was also able to get my hands on a physical copy and MY GOD she's gorgeous. Will update when final review posts, but I'm expecting 5 stars!

This one was not for me. It was a bit of a slog to get through and pretty confusing at times. Maybe my own head space wasn't in the place for this, but it fell pretty flat for me.

The format is a bit of a climb to get into but once I was able to acclimate, I think this is a really well done debut, taking you inside the experience of navigating mental illness & trauma & relationships as a queer daughter of immigrants. If you like stream of consciousness type stories, this is a must read.The format is a bit of a climb to get into but once I was able to acclimate, I think this is a really well done debut, taking you inside the experience of navigating mental illness & trauma & relationships as a queer daughter of immigrants. If you like stream of consciousness type stories, this is a must read.

Such a unique and captivating story. Exploring queerness, love and family, this story strikes all the emotional chords. And the cover is stunning to boot.

arc via netgalley

This story is told alternatively between twenty-seven-year-old Norma’s stream of consciousness, various sessions with her new therapist, and her barely fictional fiction.

Norma’s diagnosed with depersonalization/derealization disorder. As she works to complete her manuscript, Norma is haunted by Oblivion™️, her girlfriend’s kindness, and SSRI side effects.

Existential, vocal of futuristic dread, and portraying the wonders of trying to get better through modern medicine and any other possible alternative for salvation from your own thoughts.

Personally, stream of consciousness narrations can be hit or miss: here it manages to truly showcases spiral thought process, and even be relatable.

Of course, therapy is different for everyone. I really enjoyed how things slowly came together as the story progressed, you came to realize things about the protagonist along side her.

If you have been itching to read about the modern horrors (as in, 2020’s onward), the complexities of being human, queer, surviving with mental illness, and love: maybe this is for you.

Spectacular!! It was a wild lesbian roller coaster and I loved every minute of it. I was very intrigued with the story and was so happy to be able to read it early.

A book about a haunting woman's stream of consciousness about this dark cruel world? Sign me right up. This was more than that though because it also addressed mental health. There was so much representation in this book and I can see many people being touched after finishing this. At first it was hard to get into because the formatting of this book is different, maining being told from inside the MCs head. Following Norma along on her journey after she receives a diagnosis from her therapist as she navigates it. However once I got used to it, I was hooked and rooting for her to find her way. I would even say at times she was unreliable as a narrator which I love in books. This is definitely for those looking for a moody book, worth the read.

This cover is so gorgeous and the premise sounded so intriguing, and I got about 24% in. This book is so trippy and I loved the many layers to the story telling. Unfortunately this is the kind of book, for me, where it needs to be read in one big gulp because stopping made it hard to pick it back up again.

2.5 stars
First, let me say that "Please Stop Trying to Leave Me" is an excellent title. Perhaps it set my expectations up for a book I did not receive. I've been struggling to find the right words for why I did not enjoy reading this book. The closest I can come is that it feels very specific. Like, maybe the author would enjoy reading it and maybe a close friend or two, but I cannot imagine why anyone else would care. That sounds harsh, and I can see that others on Goodreads liked it, but it feels like the main character goes out of her way to make herself unrelatable. Even though she and I share many of the same characteristics and life experiences, she felt alien, unbelievable, and not just a little insufferable.

I honestly really loved this book, but I understand why some may find it a bit disjointed and/or hard to follow. Personally speaking, I enjoy "stream-of-consciousness" style writing and — while I do agree with some of my peers in that reading PSTtLM *did* feel very much like a wild fever dream — thought said style was executed very well. This book is also quite ambitious with its overall plot and how it's structured, which I ultimately feel is about learning how to find/rediscover love & joy & just.... the will to truly *live* again after trauma & reconciling with one's demons. I just found it all to be very beautiful, if not quite sad at times, and found myself thinking on a lot of its themes long after I finished. Would definitely rec checking this one out if you can (+ is the cover not just GORGEOUS?!)

Please Stop Trying to Leave Me was an excellent read. I loved the character study and the writing felt propulsive. I would read more from this author again.