"The Joy of Imperfect Love" is a transformative journey that unravels the beauty and complexities of love. From its poignant opening line, "Love is learned," the book gracefully guides readers through a profound exploration of relationships, offering invaluable insights that resonate deeply. With each page, I found myself reassessing my connections with loved ones, gaining newfound understanding and compassion. This gem of a self-help book is a beacon of wisdom, inviting multiple readings to savor its teachings fully. Prepare to embark on a journey of self-discovery and embrace the joy of imperfect love.

I enjoy books where I can learn and this allowed that. I enjoyed the read and did not find it over whelming.

I found this piece to be exceptionally well-crafted, and I'm eagerly anticipating the opportunity to delve into more works by this author. Given its potential popularity among our library patrons, we're certainly looking forward to adding it to our collection

I really enjoyed reading this book and learning more about myself. I normally don't read self help books, but this book opened that genre for me.

Dive into the heart of romantic relationships with "The Joy of Imperfect Love" by Dr. Carla Marie Manly, where the beauty of connection thrives amidst the chaos of personal growth and attachment challenges. This insightful guide steers clear of fairy-tale illusions, inviting readers into a journey toward profound, enduring love by embracing its inherent flaws and complexities. Dr. Manly skillfully navigates the intricacies of human relationships with actionable advice, drawing from a wealth of clinical experience and poignant narratives. Through engaging exercises and enlightening case studies, she illuminates the path to nurturing self-love and enriching partnerships. Uncover the liberating truths that pave the way to a fulfilling love life, marked by authentic, evolving bonds.

A compelling, compassionate, and helpful book for anyone who finds themselves struggling either inside a relationship, outside of a relationship, or simply looking to improve their relationships beyond where they currently are. While the book does focus on those in or looking for romantic relationships, I also took away a lot of interesting concepts for my relationship with my self, my friends, my family members, and my own child.

I was particularly compelled by the many compassionate, caring case studies portrayed in the book. (I want more updates on where those people are now!) Dr. Manly poses many questions and exercises that will make you think more deeply about how your concepts of love and perfection function in your life.


Thank you to Dr. Manley for the advanced review copy!

I really enjoyed this book! It was not only honest, but needed. It really helped me look at the way I love, versus how I should!

DNF @ 21%

Unfortunately I wasn’t able to finish this book and I believe it’s because of the fact that I am very picky with books especially non-fiction ones. I haven’t read many self-discovery/self-help books but I was interested in reading this as I personally have issues with developing relationships and secure attachments.

The first chapter was scientific and provided a lot of information on the science of love and how important it is to receive at an early age to form healthy attachments and for optimal growth development. It included research and studies conducted by professors however I felt it was a bit overwhelming for me and found myself skimming through the pages.

The book includes patient case studies which allows you to realise that you are not alone when it comes to dealing with certain issues but I found that it did take up a good chunk of what I did end up reading and didn’t really offer anything to me besides sitting in on a conversation between a patient and their consultant.

There are definitely people out there who would benefit from reading this especially if they would like insight into what makes a relationship truly secure and healthy and how to personally improve their self-love but in the end it just wasn’t for me.

The Joys of Imperfect Love" prompts introspection, urging readers to define love on their terms and evaluate their parental relationships as models. It encourages self-parenting for those lacking nurturing experiences. The book was easy to read and flowed well. I especially enjoyed all of the research references and science information.

The Joy of Imperfect Love : The Art of Creating Healthy, Securely Attached Relationships. This is an in depth book exploring attachment issues, self love, personal growth, and developing healthy and happy relationships. It encourages you to see that imperfect love is the healthiest form of love, and notes that real love is messy and flawed and always a work in progress. The book is full of good advice, exercises, food for thought and some really relatable case studies and examples. It is quite a heavy book and needs to be read slowly in order to digest it all, but it is a hopeful read full of really useful advice. Highly recommended for everyone as we are all part of relationships with other human beings.

The Joys of Imperfect Love has taken the topic of attachment theory in an approachable way. I found chapters were laid out well and created a nice progression as you moved through the novel. I was happy to see a part based in self-love as well as a section based in love into various other relationships. The novel itself allowed the reader to take a deeper look within themselves and determine what the concept of love means to them. The case studies were approachable, and I think it would be easy for the ideal audience for this book to see themselves within them. UI also liked the idea of the different practice exercises within the self-awareness section. With all this said, this book reads as a self-help book based in substance. There were pieces of the book that I disagreed with as a mental health professional, but I feel that is more based in differences of opinion in theory and application of theory as opposed to anything adamantly wrong with the book itself.

3.5/5 stars but increased to 4 stars as I do believe this would appeal to people seeking this knowledge.

The Joys of Imperfect Love seeks to make the reader self aware. It seeks to push the reader to define what love is for them personally, to look at their relationships with their parents and examples of love they had modeled for them and decide if that’s the type of love they want for themselves going forward. If not, it helps the reader self-parent to provide the love they never had. 



For those of us who had varying degrees of different types of love, it was quite eye opening. I saw myself in many of the case studies and was grateful that I didn’t see myself in others. 

I’ve done a lot of reading and thinking on my own, so I may be more self aware than the average person my age, which gave me an appreciation for this book. It also introduced me to the author who is a trained clinical psychologist who hosts a podcast and offers other valuable resources and tools on her website so that her guidance and teaching can remain with me long after I’ve finished the book. 



The only part I didn’t love was that it reads as if parents that are addicts are incapable of love and in my experience, my addict parent was much more loving and supportive than the parent who was completely healthy. However, I understand as a whole that this probably isn’t the case for most parents with an addiction. I just hate the notion that if you struggle with something yourself you’re incapable of love because for me the fact that my dad couldn’t save his own life, couldn’t love himself, but loved me so much is the purest form of love there is. 


There's comfort in knowing you're not alone in what you're experiencing and it felt good to have my feelings about my parents and childhood validated and explained, especially my mom who demonstrates "false love."