This peculiar debut novel combines comedy, mystery, and the undead with a healthy dose of southern charm. Read on for a quick synopsis and my review!
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It’s 1999 small town Southeast Texas where the headstrong, and somewhat shifty, Evans women run the hometown funeral parlor. Ducey, Lenore, and Grace Evans have more secrets than a sinner has sweat droplets in church, and things start going awry when their…patrons…begin to rise. Young Luna Evans, only 15, is caught in the middle of it all: trying to untangle the family’s mysteries while still in high school! The Strigoi - the original vampire - are back, and the Evans women must fight back to protect their town, and their family.
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I enjoyed this listen for all of its back and forth banter, mysteries that keep you guessing up until the end, and strong female characters throughout. It also felt rather nostalgic for me personally, hearing the references to small town life and Texas-specific references like Blue Bell ice cream and What-a-Burger 🥰

I had a bit of a hard time piecing together the family tree initially, but that may have just been because I was listening rather than seeing the names physically on the pages. I absolutely ADORE Ducey Evans! She’s a no-nonsense, say-it-like-it-is fireball of a great grandmother who doesn’t let anything slow her down!

There’s some fairly graphic content in this novel regarding the Strogoi attacks in the town, so proceed with caution if you don’t like graphic depictions and/or you have a squeamish stomach.

I felt like there are still some loose ends? But I also know this is the first in a series, so my hope is that those will get picked up and continued in the future novels, which I will look forward to reading!!
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Bless Your Heart is out 9 April 2024! Thank you to @netgalley and @macmillan.audio for the ARC audiobook for this exciting new title!

I wasn’t sure if I was going to like this one but boy was it fun! I wasn’t sure what to expect but it blew me away. I love the vampire aspects and that it was a line of women relatives who did the hunting it was hard to put down! Thanks to NetGalley for the chance to review.

This book was a lot of fun. The southern dialog was really fun for me as someone who grew up in the south. The story itsself was a bit confusing at first but it started to come together as the book went along and I found myself really enjoying this. The characters were fun but also very grounded. Overall a solid story!

I was really excited about this book as I am a native Texan and a fan of vampire stories, but boy did this disappoint. Bless Your Heart has double meaning to anyone who grew up in the South it can mean- "I feel for you" or "F you" equally. I thought there would be something crafty and fun about the title, but if there was, it was lost on me.

Set in 1999 - the writer tries to cram every single reference to that time period in the book - Chanel "Vamp" nail polish which at the turn of the century was the fifth selling best nail polish in the world, Hot Topic or Mall Goth kids, (which to a Gen X goth like me was an abomination), Nine Inch Nails, and so on. We are literally hit over the head with this.

I could not connect with any of the characters and the Evans women seemed like caricatures or at least cruel sterotypes of Texas women of the time. Knowing the writer's history, it feels like the contempt that many Pacific Northwesterners look down their noses disdainfully at people from this part of the country with. If I had to hear about one more of Lenore's butterscotch candies, I felt like I was going to puke.

I didn't give this book one star, because I felt that Lindy Ryan does have some chops as a writer. However, I feel she got inspired reading Grady Hendrix's far superior novel - "The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires". Grady is a much more nuanced writer and from the South, so this material was much more in his bailiwick. If you have to choose one of these to read- choose Hendrix's novel.

It seems as if some folks were shocked by the graphic material in the book. I was not. If anything, it seemed like a distraction from the banality of the characters featured in Bless Your Heart.


Thanks to Macmillian Audio, Minatour Books, and Net Galley for the audio ARC.

First thank you Macmillan Audio and Net Galley for this Arc! It was everything!

If you love a delightfully southern ensemble cast of characters and a new old take on vampires this is a must read.

It's 1999- which gives me all the nostalgia feels- small town Texas and the Evans family are weird. Not just weird but run the funeral home weird. No men in the house weird. An-event-that-nobody-talks-about 15 years ago weird.

Matriarch Ducey Evans is every wise old Southern woman with sass you didn't know you needed yo read about. Her daughter Lenore begat her daughter Grace who begat Luna- 15 years ago.

The days are hot and the dead are rising in their small town- and its time for Luna to learn the family secret- the Evans women are all that stand between their town and Strigoi aka vampires.

Fast-paced, witty, and nostalgic Bless Your Heart is a Southern vampire readers dream. Just funny enough, Just gruesome enough- I could read more about this town and these characters.

I absolutely ADORED this book!! This book reminded me so much of what made me fall in love with cozy supernatural films and books growing up and the importance of family and myths and knowing where you’re from and the meaning your name carries while living in a small town. Lindy Ryan absolutely knocked it out of the park with this one and I loved every second I was in this novel. Stephanie Németh-Parker’s narration was pure gold too, made the whole experience so immersive.

If I could give this book some vibe siblings they would have to be Cate Teirnan’s Sweep series, Practical Magic (movie), and Charlaine Harris’s Midnight Texas.

A huge thank you to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and Macmillan Audio. I honestly asked to read this because of the cover, and it was so amazing. The story, the characters, the horror aspects, the witty dialogue, everything was perfect, and the narrator did a fantastic job making each person memorable. This is what a vampire book should be like. I'm eagerly looking forward to reading more by this author, preferably with some in this world.

Book Title: Bless your Heart
Author: Lindy Ryan
Narrator: Stephanie Nemeth-Parker
Publisher: Macmillan Audio
Genre: Mystery Thriller (Also described as a horror, comedy)
Pub Date: April 19, 2024
My Rating: 3
Pages 304


Story is based in a small Southeast Texas town in 1990. Four generations of Evans women – Ducey – the 80 year old Matriarch, , Lenore, Grace the Daughter and now Grace’s Daughter Luna run the only funeral parlor.
They also happen to take care of the ones that don't stay dead.

When town gossip Mina Jean Murphy’s body is brought in for a regular burial and she rises from the dead, it is clear that the original vampires are back.
They doing the only thing to save and protect the town they staking her through the heart.

I knew this story was about vampires but I thought it was going to be fun. There were parts I did enjoy but yikes so much blood.

Want to thank NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for granting me this early audiobook.
Publishing Release Date scheduled for April 19, 2024.

Thank you to MacMillan Audio for my advanced copy of Bless Your Heart by Lindy Ryan publishing April 9th, narrated by Stephanie Németh-Parker.

This genre-bending release has humor, heart, suspense, and horror! Perfect for fans of Grady Hendrix's "A Southerner's Guide to Slaying Vampires," Ryan's new release follows 4 generations of Evans' women who run a small-town funeral parlor and guard the living from those who raise from the dead!

It's 1999, and while the Evans' women are preparing Mina Jean Murphey's body for burial, she stirs and sits up in her coffin. It's clear that the Strigoi - original vampire - are back, and the Evans women must protect their town before more bodies start piling up or before the local Sheriff's office start asking way too many. Unfortunately, viciously attacked bodies keep getting called in, and the Evans' matriarch realizes that the secrets she and her daughters thought they had buried 15 years ago, might be back to haunt them and put their youngest, Luna's life in danger. Forced to tell Luna about her family's true heritage (while violently driving a stake into the heart of a recently raised dead body in their morgue), Luna must learn and train (quickly!) before the walking dead overtake the whole town.

Y'all. I'm a born and raised Southerner, and there is just something so fun about an 80 year old grandmother who sucks butterscotch candy being the matriarch of a vampire hunter family. Ducey Evans is sharp-tongued, strong-willed, and hilariously blunt. Her daughter, Leonor, is more curious about the undead, and has been secretly stashing their ashes to study them, while Grace is soft-hearted unless it comes to protecting her teen daughter, Luna. Together, the women must solve who is still out in the community feeding on locals and getting stronger every day. The story is told through a variety of POVs, from the Evans women, the sheriff, detectives on the force, and other local victims. The narrator, Németh-Parker, did a FANTASTIC job differentiating between the different characters. Her southern twang, drawl, and comedic delivery was perfect for this family! Listening to the audiobook added so much to my overall reading experience.

The plot was propulsive, and make no mistake, there is nothing 'sweet' about the horror. The Strigoi make an absolute MESS out of their victims, but the Evans women do their best to conceal the truth about the horror lurking in the shadows. While the ending leaves the current mystery resolved, it seems to foreshadow that this story will be continuing into a possible series, which is really exciting!

Readers will adore:
90's Cultural References
Strong Women
Sharp banter and LOL moments
Twist and Turns
Multiple POVs
Family secrets and hidden identities
Start of a new series!

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this book. I had both the elecrtonic galley and the audiobook for review and combined them into a single review. It will post to my blog on April 2. I'll also highlight the book and review on Instagram that day and post the review to Goodreads, The Storygraph and retail sites as well.

Review:
I love a fun horror comedy novel, especially when it's full of Southern charm and witty sayings. In this funny and creepy novel, readers are taken on a wild ride through Southeast Texas. If you're a fan of undead creatures, family drama, and a healthy dose of Southern charm, then this book is sure to be right up your alley. I received a digital ARC as well as an advance copy of the audiobook, so I was able to read and listen at the same time, which was extra fun! I might need to start doing this for more books in the future. It really enhanced my experience.

Set in 1999, "Bless Your Heart" introduces us to the fierce and fabulous Evans women who run the only funeral parlor in town. Ducey, Lenore, Grace, and teenaged Luna find themselves at the center of a supernatural storm when the Strigoi—an ancient sort of vampire—resurfaces in their seemingly quiet town. When the first body comes to the morgue - and then reanimates - all sorts of havoc ensues. The Evans women are prepared, though, and as people around town begin to drop like flies - and then come back as something not quite human - all eyes begin to turn toward the Evans women and their funeral home - what is planted underneath that rose bush that Grace fawns over anyway? Over the course of a few days, family secrets come to light, fingers are pointed, secrets are revealed, and when all is said and done, the Evans family will never be the same.

It's not every day that you come across a book that seamlessly blends horror, humor, and heartwarming moments, but "Bless Your Heart" manages to do just that. Ryan's writing is sharp, witty, and brimming with creative flair. The dialogue crackles with energy, and the characters leap off the page with their unique quirks and personalities. From the no-nonsense Ducey to her spunky daughter Lenore, her lovable daughter Grace, and Grace's teen daughter Luna, each member of the Evans family brings something special to the table. This is also where I need to give a major shoutout to the audiobook narrator. She effortlessly portrays each of these women (and several other characters) with a unique voice and speech cadence. I was in awe the entire time I was listening. A lot of times, audiobook narrators can do maybe 2 or 3 voices, but in this case, every character has a distinct voice, which really elevates the experience.

Another aspect of this book that I really enjoyed was its strong emphasis on female relationships and empowerment. The bond between Ducey, Lenore, Grace, and Luna is at the heart of the story, and it's a joy to see these women support and protect each other in the face of danger. The sense of family loyalty is palpable, and I really felt like I knew these characters. Ryan also delves into deeper themes of family, love, and the secrets we keep buried, skillfully weaving together past and present, revealing shocking revelations and hidden truths.

But don't let the heartwarming moments fool you—the book is also full of spine-tingling suspense, eerie thrills, and some gore, reminding us that this is very much a horror novel with a side of comedy and heart. The small-town setting adds a layer of Southern charm to the story, making it feel like you're right there in the midst of all the action. And, naturally, it's the addition of the Strigoi that provides the story with its central conflict. I loved this fresh take on zombie-like vampires that can become stronger and more human-like - it added a fresh take on a familiar trope.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book. The delightful blend of horror, humor, and heart left me wanting to join the Evans women on their next adventure. With its unforgettable characters, twisty plot, and Southern flair, this book is a must-read for anyone craving a fresh take on the supernatural genre - especially if you're a fan of horror-comedy. Goodreads lists this book as "A Bless Your Heart Novel," which implies that this might be the start of a series. If that's the case, I'm super excited! Bless your heart, indeed.

The audio was great! The narrator had great sound effects for sucking on hard candies and the sheriff talking. The story reminded me of Salem’s Lot. People drop like flies and pretty gruesomely. You would think that from the cover, but it’s not a cozy mystery. I enjoyed it and thought the writing was great but maybe not my cup of tea.

I received a gifted copy of BLESS YOUR HEART by Lindy Ryan, thank you to St. Martin's Press and Macmillan Audio.

BLESS YOUR HEART is set in Texas in 1999. The Evans women own and operate the funeral parlor for their town. They do the usual preparations for burial, but sometimes there's more to the story. When a body is brought in showing signs of coming back from the dead, the eldest of the Evans women know that the Strigoi (vampires) are back again and they must train the new generation in their true calling.

More people around town start disappearing, dying, and coming back. Complicating matters more, Deputy Taylor is asking a lot of questions that threaten to bring out the family's secrets. Something unusual is going on and Ducey, Lenore, Grace, and Luna Evans must get to the bottom of it to protect the town.

I didn't know a lot about this book going in, but I took a chance on picking it up during a readathon and wound up easily able to binge read the full book without any regrets. It is a horror book and there is gore to be had, but there's some humor and small town charm somehow mixed in as well. The family has a lot of secrets that not all of the members know, and certainly that the town doesn't know, so there is much to discover as the book goes back and forth between POVs.

I really find the different way authors handle vampire lore to be interesting and I enjoyed the new takes this author brought about. There are elements that felt familiar, but also some things that brought new life to the undead.

⭐ 4 / 5
Thank you @netgalley and @macmillian.audio for allowing me to listen to this audiobook ALC. The unbiased opinions presented in this review are mine alone.
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Delightfully gory!

Butterfly clips? Shopping malls? Glitter lipgloss (that is probably not safe for human consumption)? Bless my elder millennial heart! I loved the nostalgia this book elicited. This was the light-hearted, Southern-charmed story I didn’t know I needed. I guess it is best categorized as a mystery-horror but it’s not particularly scary and there is a charming quality woven into all the gore. Can the gruesomely undead be fun? Apparently.

For generations, the Evans women have owned the only funeral parlor in their small Southeast Texas town. People die, they bury them. Every once in a while one wakes up and they take care of that too. The Evans family is made up of Ducey - the butterscotch-loving, straight-shooting, spitfire, matriarch, her kind-hearted daughter Lenore, her reserved and emotionally haunted granddaughter Grace, and Luna, her 15-year-old great-granddaughter.

It has been 15 years since the last outbreak of Strigoi or “restless dead,” a mess that ended with two bodies buried, Grace with a scar on her hand, and her infant daughter without a father. When the bodies of two locals rise in the funeral parlor, the older Evans women realize it is long past time for them to share the family secrets with Luna. Meanwhile, a new ‘odd’ boy Luna’s age has arrived in town and other locals are going missing, some leaving behind brutally bloody scenes. Deputy Roger Taylor is scrambling to solve the mystery before more bodies pile up. As the investigation keeps leading back to the funeral parlor and Taylor begins asking questions, the Evans women realize their messy past may be repeating itself.

<i>Bless Your Heart</i> is a multi-POV novel, but Luna is arguably the main character. Although it is hard to get to know the characters on a deeper level with the multi-POV, it seems to work here. You get a sense for what is going on all around the small town and how everyone is connected. Since this is the first in a series, I’m thinking we’ll get to know everyone more in the coming books.

I was engaged with this audiobook from start to finish, but the last third is action-packed. I felt the wrap-up at the end was a little rushed and the ‘big reveal’ did not surprise me at all, but it was still wickedly entertaining. The narrator Stephanie Nemeth Parker was excellent. All characters had their own voice. A few of the characters have what can be considered “annoying habits” (e.g. smacking lips each time they speak). Stephanie Nemeth Parker performed these quirks quite well, as evidenced by my involuntary twitching with each one.

If you're squeamish and you hate discussion of gore and/or vomit, this book may not be for you (or just prepare yourself)…cause there’s A LOT! If you're not bothered by those things and you’re looking for a fun, nostalgic read - check this one out.

<u>*Content warnings*</u> (may not be all-inclusive)
Many occurrences of blood, gore, violent death, dismemberment, consumption of body parts, disembodied human teeth, and emesis. Death of a child (teen). Columbine school shooting (referenced). Homophobic slurs. Racism (referenced). Injury to animal (dog). For those with misophonia - the mouth noises exhibited by some of the characters in the audiobook may be cringe-inducing.

This book is so cozy, cute and spooky! The Evans girls are now running the local funeral parlor that grandma/mom, Ducey, has run for the past eighty years. Little Luna doesn’t know that the Evans ladies have been dealing with the Strigoi (original vampire) all these years. It’s time they tell the youngest little lady of the Evans pack so she knows who she is and what her family is all about.

I listened to the audiobook and the narrator, Stephanie Nemeth Parker, was so good. She nailed it with the southern accents and immerses the audience straight into this southern vampire mess! The bodies begin to rise from the dead again after a short hiatus. The Evans family will have to figure out how to handle it before it gets out of control.

A fun, quick read that is full of chilling but comedic charm! Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC of this book.

Initial Thoughts
This was a fun and entertaining read! The four generations of Evans women were all great characters. I was hooked pretty early in the book and couldn't wait to see how things would work out in the end. There were some pretty big surprises worked into the story which I really appreciated. I listened to the audiobook and thought that the narrator did a fantastic job with this story.

Review copy provided by the publisher. Full review to be posted soon.

Definitely a different style of book than one I’d typically have on my shelf. This book was an engaging and fun read. A little bit darker and gorier than I had expected, but if you can get past that there are lots of laughs to be had!

The Evans’s women are the owner/operators of the only funeral parlor in their small county of southeastern Texas, and they have been for many years. When the dead die it is their job alone to make certain that they make sure they’re brought to their grave with peace. But sometimes they also have to make sure they stay dead. Suddenly residents are showing up dead and going missing, and the deputy officer is asking too many questions. Ducey, Lenore, Grace, and Luna must now take up their blades and take care of business, the one only they know how to do.

Ever want to read (or listen) to a paranormal mystery that will make you giggle and be mildly grossed out at the same time? This is definitely the pick I recommend; I had an incredibly fun time listening to this book!
I received an Advanced copy of the Audiobook version of this book, big thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for the chance to have a listen before it is released.

My favourite aspects of this book were absolutely the characters, the Evans’s women are an absolutely joy, they have the right amount of sass and charm that really makes you love a story regardless of what the story does, I am pretty certain I could read an entire story about the Evans’s family just doing their day-to-day funeral business, they have wit, courage, and the right amount of humour.
The only thing I would add to this book is I wish we would have spent a bit more time in Ducey’s POV, she was absolutely a gem and I would have loved to hear more of her inner musings. I was expecting a tad more laughs but I do believe the right amount of humour was mixed into the story that it balanced the mild horror and rest of the storyline to make it all vibe in nicely!

There are a couple things that might bother readers in this novel, there is some body horror, some descriptions of body parts and other things being not where they’re supposed to be, to put it delicately. It isn’t gratuitous or overly described but could still bother certain readers!

I consumed this book as an Audiobook, it was given to me for free as an ARC in exchange for honest feedback. The audiobook comes in at 10H49M, it will also be available as an eBook coming in at 304 pages as well as a physical book also coming in at 304 pages!
Bless Your Heart is set to be released on April 9th 2024! Pre-order is now on many of your favourite websites and retailers!

Can I start off by saying I absolutely loved Ducey's character!? She's one to talk her share of smack then conclude with "Bless her heart!" Lol. I thought she was such a great character in this book!

The Evans women (Ducey, her daughter Lenore, and her daughter Grace) own the only funeral parlor in town, and their family has been doing so for years. Their work is the normal laying the dead to rest, up until recently. When Mina Jean Murphy died, she was brought to the parlor, and not soon after did something strange happen. Mina started moving! She had died, however became a strigoi (risen from the dead like zombies, but feast and suck blood like vampires) This, surprisingly, was not new to the Evans women. The last time they encountered a strigoi was 15 years ago, but this time was different. Strigoi are popping up left and right! The Evans women need to figure out how this is happening - who is raising the dead? It doesn't help that they haven't told Luna, the youngest Evans female, any of this. She has no idea of what her family does.

I enjoyed this book a lot, however I wasn't too fond of the multiple POV. The Evans women POVs were great, but did we really need any of the deputy's POV? Did we need Kim's POV?..


Thank you to NetGalley & publisher for providing me with this awesome ARC in exchange for my honest review!

This was a clever and engaging listen. It was a little darker than I anticipated, with less black humor (I was expecting more of a Southern Ladies Guide vibe), so was a bit heavier than I thought it would be. It was a very interesting story though and a great listen, as the narrator did an excellent job differentiating her characters without going over the top. There is a heavy emphasis on family and the bonds between women, which I really enjoyed. I would definitely look up Lindy Ryan again, and was pleased to see that it is listed as "Book #1" - although I do hope there would be some shifts in focus, as I'm not entirely sure that the fundamental elements alone would be sufficiently interesting to support multiple books.

A huge thank you to Macmillan Audio for granting me access to this extremely unique read by Lindy Ryan. Bless Your Heart is quirky, it's serious, and it's at its core a book about family. I really enjoyed this as an audiobook. The women in this book are all so different from one another but their unconditional love is evident in everything they do for one another.

Luna's family is different. They own the funeral parlor in town. Her whole life, Luna has been surrounded by death as the women in her family work to lay folks to rest. However, recently, there have been more deaths than usual and by no means are they typical nor natural. The Evans women know something is up and their worst fears are actualized as they realize it's worse than they ever could have imagined. Now they are forced to confront what's happening while trying to keep their own secrets buried.

The audio at times made me laugh out loud because of how quirky some of the characters were. Be prepared to crave a butterscotch after reading this one. I anticipated this being a light read based on the cover art, but there is a lot going on within this book.