“There Is No Ethan" is both an eye-opener and a page-turner, diving deep into the world of online dating and catfishing. Anna Akbari’s part memoir, part detective story reveals the shocking truth about how easily one can be deceived online.

In 2011, three smart, successful women fell for Ethan Schuman, a man who seemed perfect but was hiding behind a facade of emotional lies. Each woman, caught up in his web, didn’t know about the others. His convincing excuses to avoid video calls and last-minute meetups were accepted because, after all, he wasn’t asking for money, so what could his motive to lie possibly be? Instead, Ethan sought to entangle these women in intensely intimate emotional bonds.

The book follows these women as they independently start noticing cracks in Ethan’s stories and eventually connect with each other to unravel a much bigger deceit. Together, they realize the web of deceit goes much further than they could have imagined and uncover dozens of other victims, showing just how deep and dark the world of catfishing can get. Akbari not only shares her personal ordeal but also paints a broader picture of modern relationships where digital interactions can easily distort reality.

Akbari’s narrative is engaging, pulling you right into the psychological and emotional rollercoaster of her experiences. The book starts with a deep dive into her relationship with Ethan, showing step-by-step how a catfish operates. The latter half feels like a detective story, as the women piece together who Ethan really is.

The book does a great job of showing that anyone can fall prey to such deceit, challenging the stereotype that only the naive get tricked. It’s a stark reminder of the importance of keeping your guard up when forming connections online.

While the book is a gripping read, it could have probed deeper into Ethan’s motivations, which remain somewhat mysterious. Also, the early parts with emails and messages might seem a bit scattered until you get the full picture of the situation.

"There Is No Ethan" is a must-read if you’re into true crime or interested in the psychological aspects of online relationships. It’s a stark warning about the realities of digital dating and the lengths some will go to exploit others. Thanks to Grand Central Publishing and NetGalley for the ARC—this was a captivating read!

Absolutely page-turning. It took me a little while to get into it because reading other people's chats and verbose flirty conversations was a bit weird, but once it got going it is just unbelievable. This is such an interesting story, covering as it does a time before ubiquitous video chatting and social media like it is now. I remember it so well but I think it will seem completely foreign to younger readers. The author thoroughly explains how things were and why she and the other women behaved as they did.

The implications of the person behind the scam are extremely disturbing. I don't even know what to think. Really well written and candid, and I hope will make other people who have experienced similar feel less embarrassed and alone.

Man oh man did this story fill me with rage. I found myself boiling…. No, simmering with anger. Unfortunately catfishing is a real thing and happens all of the time. We can thank the lovely internet for that.

Ethan meets three different women online at different times. He starts to court them. Considering he is highly intelligent and quite the charmer, it becomes clear that they want to meet him. I really can’t give you any more details but I’m sure you have an idea. I mean, everyone has seen the movie Catfish or the series at least right? Highly addictive but terribly disturbing.

Why on earth would you continue to talk to someone and invest your whole time and energy if they refuse to talk on the phone or video chat? Hello! Your first clue is THEY ARE HIDING SOMETHING! Period! However, this book delves deep into the loneliness these women experience. There was always something niggling at them to know the truth. Why would someone spend years invested in a relationship that is just not tangible? EVER!

Now, I will share my own personal experience in the age of Love@AOL. In the year 2000 I had been talking to a guy online that was absolutely gorgeous. We messaged almost nightly. Flirted intensely. I started to like this guy y’all. Well, I was flying up to Detroit to visit my brother. This man lived in St Louis, MO. I got a layover in St. Louis just so I could meet him face to face. Listen when I tell you that I stood in that airport waiting for him to walk up to only never appear. Yep. That’s my story. He disappeared. Probably married or whatever, but it taught me a little lesson. Just remember that anyone can be anybody they want through a screen.

I thought the author’s writing was excellent. She goes into great lengths to share each woman’s experience and how Ethan wrecked their lives forever. His manipulations and the control he had over them was baffling. I finished this is one day. Highly recommend if you enjoy investigative stories.
Thanks so much @grandcentralpub @NetGalley and Anna Akbari for the opportunity.
Publication date June 4, 2024
4⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

It’s 2010, and Anna meets Ethan Schuman online via OKCupid. They have an instant connection and spends hours texting and messaging each other online. They set up a time to go on a date, but Ethan cancels. And so goes the rest of the story with Anna and Ethan. He won’t talk on the phone, he won’t Skype video, and he won’t meet up in person. Something always comes up. Anna is suspicious and reaches out to a few other women that she realizes Ethan had dated in the past. At this point, the women realize they are being conned. Ethan is not a real person. But who is he?

This is a quick and engaging read. I was invested in finding out who Ethan is, and you do find out. This is a crazy story about an online catfisher. I’m glad the women exposed Ethan.

Thank you to Netgalley and Grand Central Publishing for the ARC of this book.

**do not look up the author or the ending before reading it- because figuring it all out as the author does is the way to do it

I love a good catfish story and this one did not disappoint. As someone who has never online dated it is easy for me to hear stories of people being catfished and think "how in the world did you not know what was happening?" This book brought so much insight into how/why people often stay in these relationships despite never seeing the person they are dating in real life.

This story follows Anna, British Anna, and Gina as they each fall in love with a man they met online named Ethan. (About 50% of the book is Anna's story, followed by 10% each British Anna and Gina's story, and the last 30% the discovery of Ethan and where everything ended). He gives them empty promises of meeting in person and these womens heart are just strung along the emotional rollercoaster in the process. I loved hearing each womens story and how they came to find out and question that Ethan may not be all that he seems. Thats all that I'll say because when you uncover the real truth it is honestly shocking.

This book is set to release June 4, 2024. Thank you to Grand Central Publishing and the author for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This book pisses me off. I’m grateful that it was written, but it makes me so angry and that the laws are so behind the crimes. These women were horribly abused and received no justice.

I hesitated requesting this one because she was a sociologist, I didn’t think Anna was someone who would be easily catfished. I requested it anyway thinking it would be an interesting read. I was wrong, it was a great read. My heart breaks for British Anna. It’s a book that examines everything, even when the answers aren’t there.

I highly recommend this to everyone. This kind of thing can happen anywhere online, it’s not always dating sites.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC, but all opinions are my own.

I could not put this book down! I became so invested in Anna's experience. I, too, have played the online dating game, and while I have not been catfished (to my knowledge, at least), I often wonder if the person on the other end of the chat is really who they seem. Maybe that's why I don't participate in it anymore. I like knowing what I'm getting into. (I am also very impatient and thus unlikely to keep up a conversation with someone who never materializes). Not that I'm trying to say anything against these amazing women! This is an amazing analysis of how people respond to words and emotions. I'm in awe of Anna and how she was able to turn the tables on ES. I sincerely hope this person is brought to justice eventually, but I'm a huge believer in karma... and I hope they get theirs soon.
Highly recommend this one!!

Okay this was wild. I was so enthralled for the first half which dives into the conversations the author has with "Ethan." Reading about the three women confronting this catfish to get her to admit she was Ethan was intense. I really enjoyed this overall, it was like the best episode of Catfish.

This is an absolutely riveting thriller of a non-fiction work, told mainly from the perspective of the author – "American" Anna, if you will – as she works to put together the pieces of an online suitor who has worked diligently to get under her skin and into her life, all without ever appearing before her physically (on Skype, in person, or even on the phone). At first, you'll wonder how anyone could ever fall prey to such a seemingly simple catfish; before long, you'll realize how easily you, too, could have slipped into the waters of "Ethan" and the allure and intelligence of the emotional rollercoaster that follows.

I read this entire book in one sitting, and had to stay up past my usual bedtime to "race" to the finish. Anna is such a compelling writer, and her sociology background makes the case of Ethan and his wide web of misdeeds not so much scientific as sprawling, deep, and mesmerizing.

The author was Sociology professor in her early thirties when she joined an online dating community and met “Ethan.” They connected very quickly and began to communicate digitally almost continuously day and night. Over the course of four months, the author and “Ethan” developed an intense relationship, however, whenever Anna attempted to set up a meeting in-person or over the phone, something always came up. Eventually Anna became suspicious and began to ask around about “Ethan” which is when she discovered the other Anna, based in London, who carried on her own years long online relationship with “Ethan” and then there was Gina, also involved online with “Ethan.” The three women decided to work together to discover if “Ethan” really existed and if not, then who was the person that they were in a relationship with. This book does eventually give all the facts, including a name, and a little googling will SHOCK you. This is such an interesting story and character study. There are so many interesting facets of this book to explore and the psychology of the entire situation is fascinating. I will say that the first 40-50% of the book is mainly transcripts of the chats between the women and “Ethan” which gets old (and cringey), however, by the end I do see how reading all of the conversations adds to the overall arc of the entire true story. I received a digital copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley.

It's a wild ride! The author relays the terrifying and true story of being Catfished while online dating - a crazy journey crossing continents, spanning years and, through the intrepid and persistent courage of a group of intelligent, strong and resilient women, results in the exposure of "Ethan". I'm not the first reviewer to say it but don't look this story or it's main players up ahead of time, wait for the end of the book, it's worth it.
Anna Akbari deals with difficult and very personal subject manner with authenticity, insight and grace while unflinchingly examining her own thoughts and motivations throughout. "There is no Ethan" is well written, thought provoking and an engrossing read; recommend to everyone, regardless of online dating history, there's something here for everyone.

Thank you to the Publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this eARC in exchange for an honest review

"We'd either make it out of this thing as an unstoppable couple, or I'd dig deep enough and long enough to expose whatever he wasn't telling me."

An epic and dramatic catfish episode that spans years, countries, and three strong, intelligent women. But aside from the big question of who this Ethan person truly is, is what their motivation for all this is. They never exchanged goods, services, or money, so why manipulate these women?

Well written and totally riveting; I was glued from the first page.

A topic that you would think wouldn't be so relevant by now but it so is! You will find yourself judging these women - yes you will - but unless you experienced it it's hard to understand. The reading is fast paced and the story will have you hooked right from the start. I applaud the efforts of the three women for their determination (not to mention their incredible sleuthing abilities) to expose
"Ethan". Everyone should have their kids - both male and female - read this. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and publisher for an advanced copy in exchange for my honest opinion.

Thank you to Grand Central Publishing @grandcentralpub and Netgalley @Netgalley for the e-arc. All thoughts are my own.

This is a hard book to review because I don’t want to say too much and give things away. Few key take-aways – go into this one blind and don’t google spoilers! You will get a reveal of who Ethan really is and Oh. My. GOSH!!!!!!!! WHAT! DID NOT SEE THAT COMING! You’d think that this was a fiction novel with this twist, but sometimes the truth is too good to be fake, and that was most definitely the case here. The truth is stranger than fiction. This is a truly engaging story that is going to keep you on the edge of your seat guessing what is happening.

I have two minor complaints, and they’re minor. The emails in the beginning were out of place. I wish they had been woven into the story versus being thrown at me upfront before I had any clue who the players were.

And then finally, and this one is just more for my own morbid curiosity, but I wish we would have gotten more of the “why”. This is tricky because “Ethan” isn’t exactly going to serve his reasoning up on a silver platter, but still as a curious person, I just want to know more about what drives a person to the extreme lengths that “Ethan” went to! I think you’ll be asking yourself this same question, but alas, you will have to come up with your own reasoning.

I think that everyone who’s dating in the digital era should read this book. Is it terrifying, oh heck yes, it is. I tried very briefly to use an app to date, and after being told exactly what to wear to a casual date, I noped out and luckily for me met my husband the next day through a chance encounter.

I hope once this book comes out, and “Ethan” is truly made public, that the true “human” cost their lawyer threatened with comes true, because they surely deserve some consequences for their actions.

This is a powerful read, and I highly recommend you check it out. Just maybe don’t read it while you’re actively on an app based date?

Powerful book.
Thanks to author, publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book. While I got the book for free it had no bearing on the rating I gave it.

I will never again make fun of my friends who worry they are being catfished after reading There is No Ethan by Anna Akbari. I think this review will work best as a Q&A with questions I think you may have as a reader:

1. Is it very good?
Yes.
2. Will I like it if I have never internet dated?
First of all, I'm bitter and jealous that you didn't have to get on dating apps while the rest of us were fighting for our lives out there. But I owe you an answer and yes, I think you will. While the method of this dating may not be universal, getting sucked in and abused by a toxic person is definitely universal.
3. Yeah, but only foolish or lonely people would fall for a catfish, right?
The author, Anna Akbari, is a PhD sociologist. She didn't come from money and had to work hard to even get through school. She had previous healthy relationships and an active social life including doing things I didn't know you could do like house swapping, but I digress. The other women in the story are equally accomplished and socially adept so chill out, dude. Your tone is all wrong. It can happen to anyone.
4. Ok, so "Ethan" was a master manipulator?
Yup.
5. Do we find out who "Ethan" is?
Yup.
6. Wait, can I just google and look at the actual "Ethan" once I know the real name?
Yup, and you are damn right I did it before I finished the book.
7. Will I be enraged on multiple levels?
YUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!
8. Wow, is "Ethan"'s life going to suck after this book comes out?
IT BETTER!
9. But isn't this just reading someone else's text messages? Seems weird, doesn't it?
You're being judgy again. Who doesn't like hearing a friend talk about their latest dating drama (good or bad)? Also, Akbari spends the first part of the book digging into her messages with "Ethan" and it isn't just dropping into a conversation. You are learning about their dynamic and also peering into how the manipulation works. Akbari deserves an award purely for being so vulnerable to the reader, but she also keeps it interesting by explaining what was happening to her. The second half of the book becomes a detective story with the two other women as they unravel "Ethan".
10. Anything else I should know?
I'm so glad I'm no longer on the dating apps.
11. I am using dating apps now. Should I wait to read this book?
Knowledge is power, my friend. But you should probably keep some alcohol nearby.

(This book was provided as an advance copy by Netgalley and Grand Central Publishing.)

📚 Just finished "There is No Ethan" by Anna Akbari and I'm blown away! 🌟 This book is a captivating journey of self-discovery that had me hooked from the first page. Akbari's raw and honest portrayal of protagonist Roxanne's struggles with identity, relationships, and societal pressures is both relatable and thought-provoking. The dynamic between Roxanne and her ex-boyfriend Ethan is particularly compelling, offering a poignant exploration of love, loss, and the pursuit of authenticity. If you're looking for a heartfelt read that will linger with you long after you've finished, I highly recommend picking up "There is No Ethan." ✨ #BookReview #MustRead #AnnaAkbari #ThereIsNoEthan #Netgalley