Thank you Worthy Publishing | Worthy Books for allowing me to read and review Wishful Thinking How I Lost My Faith and Why I Want to Find It
by Donna Freitas on NetGalley.

Published: 03/26/24

Stars: 3

Genres: Biographies & Memoirs | Health, Mind & Body | Religion & Spirituality

Generally speaking I shy away from religious and spiritual memoirs. My experience is that God is good until he isn't with a lot of people. I had read Consent in 2022 by the author and today can visualize the cover, the story and the writing; 2024 has been my least memorable year of books, most I've forgotten before I finished them and I wish -- hope -- not pray that Wishful Thinking goes on the I don't remember list quickly. Freitas has written several other books I would like to explore but not with the dread I currently am feeling.

Wishful Thinking is written by an only child who is in fact an adult woman with her doctorate and two marriages. There is a whole lot of unexplained whining. She is brought up in a traditional catholic household (not me) and spends too much time whining about that. People were kind to the author and her family throughout serious illnesses and deaths, and on one hand she says thank you, with the other hand she whines.

This may be for you. Three stars is my standard for memoirs. There is a clear disconnect between Freitas here and me with Consent.

Raised Catholic, Donna Freitas wants to believe in God. Her mother embodies faith, and Donna grew up asking dozens of questions. But she could not find satisfactory answers despite attending Catholic schools and studying religion. The spark of faith refuses to hold.
This story is her attempt to write her way into an answer and work through her lack of faith. I didn't find any answers to the author's lack of faith and am not sure the author did either. But I appreciated her story and efforts. It's mostly about her mother and touches on key events in the author's life. The world needs her voice.

The common faith trope many in the United States tell is that finding God is an independent action that occurs when the individual invites Jesus into their heart. If only it were this simple. For most of us, our faith is a messy combination of our parents' faiths (or lack there of), the faith of our community and whatever church environment we grew up within. For Donna Freitas, her faith heritage is Catholic. Her parents were catholic and she was raised going to mass. When she began to ask questions, her parents will ill equipped to answer them. Church became a battle ground where she felt the act of attendance was to satisfy her mother, not to experience God. She has spent her life in the pursuit of God. This is a book about faith, about disappointment, about abuse of power, and about grief. When Freitas writes about her grief for her mother it feels like she is writing about my own experience. The chapter about finding God in lasagna is one of the best expressions of church community I have ever experienced. I have read many books about mainline protestant Christianity and evangelical Christianity, but this is the first one I have read about the struggle to find faith within the Catholic tradition.

When I read Donna's book, Consent: A Memoir of Unwanted Attention, I was blown away by her honesty and integrity. This book shows her same fearlessness. She puts herself out there fully on her struggles with Catholicism and with belief in God, despite her religious upbringing. I appreciate this type of completely forthcoming memoir, but it's very introspective, psychological and philosophical. There aren't that many anecdotes that really illustrate the struggles. Which unfortunately does limit the audience somewhat. I think people who generally are facing the same type of struggles with their faith will like this book. People who appreciate the dichotomy between religious and secular belief systems and how those two can conflict over and over again in contemporary life will appreciate this book. People who are wanting to believe, but can't quite bring themselves to, and people who are interested in the big life questions - - that's who will like this type of read. As someone who is not Catholic (and not Christian), not a believer really, and not someone who feels faith would enhance my life appreciably - - I don't think I'm quite the audience. But, something about Donna's voice did keep me engaged regardless, so I think for some people this book will make them feel less alone in their search for faith.

Donna Freitas' "Wishful Thinking" is a captivating memoir that I can truly say I love and gladly give an enthusiastic five stars. Somehow she can pull the reader into her quest to resolve her faith struggles., bravely putting us on her journey so that we can learn and realize that those of us who struggle aren’t alone.

I have recommended “Wishful Thinking” to everyone that I know who is a person of faith or who reads books on spirituality. Even though we have differences in our beliefs and life experiences, I too realized that I wanted the absolute faith that the women of faith who surrounded me showed in the best and worst of times. “Let go and let God” is easier said than done, no matter the yearning for it. So I appreciated Freitas' honesty, how she didn't shy away from the tough questions, how she delved into the Catholic Church's scandals with a personal story, and how she approached the intellectual challenges of reconciling faith with reason.

For readers who've gazed longingly at others who seem to find solace in their faith, this book offers a nuanced perspective. What truly elevates "Wishful Thinking" is the way Freitas connects her experience with the act of writing itself. The parallel she draws between the creative leap of faith required in writing and the search for meaning in the universe is particularly insightful for this professional medium and author working on her own writing projects.. This connection will surely resonate with readers who find solace and purpose in the written word.

So if you're looking for a spiritual memoir that's honest, thought-provoking, and deeply personal, look no further than "Wishful Thinking." Freitas' relatable journey will leave you questioning, reflecting, and perhaps even finding a renewed sense of hope, just as I did.

#WishfulThinking #FindingFaith #ChristianSpirituality #CatholicSpirituality #StTeresaOfAvila
@donnafeitas.writer @worthypub

Donna Freitas is an outspoken Catholic feminist, terms that appear at first glance to be an oxymoron. But her story proves that oxymorons these are not.

Raised in a Catholic household with a sweet mother who was always praying, the author rebelled against the dogma of the church and the insistence on one God when she learned at a young age about the gods of Ancient Greece and Rome, the gods of ancient myth. She decided that since such other gods existed, the god worshipped by the Catholic Church could not possibly be the only God and becomes a precocious atheist. She marks this unexplained dissonance as the beginning of her loss of faith and vows to absent herself from the church as much as possible. Apparently, no one explained to her that the ancients worshipped many gods, something I find puzzling, although this may represent the bias of a Catholic school education.

I, too, rebelled against my parents, practically from birth, but never on matters of faith, ritual, and belief. But I suspect my upbringing was much different than the author’s.

She goes to college at Georgetown University and periodically experiences dark nights of the soul, which she has no insight into and finds it hard to climb out of, episodes that are clearly severe depressions. However, she eventually finds her way out and goes on to get a degree in philosophy. I’ve had those in my life as well, but even in the 1960’s sought therapy. The fact that the author did not is puzzling although she states when she was in college such services were not readily available.

As her story goes on, to make a long story short, she pursues a degree in philosophy after reading philosophy that seems in sync with her own worldview, and eventually gets a Ph.D in religious studies. While studying at Catholic University, she is stalked and harassed by a particular priest, which results in another crisis of faith, or the lack thereof. These incidents are covered up by the Church. Eventually, she emerges whole and wholly Catholic, but not someone who merely settles into dogma. Rather, she becomes the Catholic feminist that she is today.

One thing I found interesting is that throughout her search for faith, it is always Catholicism to which she seeks to return, which tells me that she never had doubts about this religion. This is certainly reasonable. However, generally seekers explore other faith traditions in their quest to find spiritual resonance, and it does not seem that the author, aside from her studies of philosophy, ever studied religions other than the one of her family of origin. For me, this is a reminder to learn more about faiths other than my own.

I have very mixed feelings about this book. On the one hand, it’s an engaging and well-written memoir of a spiritual journey. On the other hand, the story is familiar to anyone who has had doubts about who they are who set forth on a journey of self-discovery. As a memoir, it is one person’s journey. And yet, I’m left with feeling I’m not sure that what the author claims to be what drove her faith underground is really the root cause. When I finished I said to myself that while the author’s journey is quite extraordinary and clearly a sort of Hero’s Journey ala Joseph Campbell, I’m not sure the book needed to be published.

I received this book from the publisher and NetGalley.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this book. All thoughts are my own. Great book about being raised in a strict catholic household and having doubts of her faith. This book came to me in a time that I needed a a different perspective on faith and this book gave it to me! Great read - totally recommend!

This was a great book about honest questions about faith and God. Surrounded by church at Catholic school, Catholic mass, Catholic Sunday school, generations of believers, Donna presents her questions thoughtfully. Good read about some very difficult experiences with the church.

Donna Freitas has truly bared her soul in this memoir describing her lifelong search for faith. Beginning at the age of six, the author questioned the concept of one true God and her mother's unwavering faith. I was able to learn a lot about the Catholic Church which had always been a mystery to me. Thanks to NetGalley, Worthy Publishing and the author for an advance copy to read and review.

Donna Freitas's "Wishful Thinking" is a deeply personal and candid journey through her tumultuous relationship with faith. Raised in a devout Catholic household yet plagued by persistent doubts, She embarks on a quest to reconcile her upbringing with her own evolving beliefs. From her childhood singing hymns to her academic pursuits in religion, Freitas grapples with questions of God, love, and meaning, all against the backdrop of her own life experiences.

Her narrative is searingly honest, offering you an intimate glimpse into her struggles with faith and the complexities of her journey. She confronts head-on the Catholic abuse scandal, her encounters with evangelical colleges, and the profound losses that shake the foundations of her beliefs. Through it all, her writing is raw and emotionally resonant, inviting readers to accompany her on her search for meaning and connection.

What makes "Wishful Thinking" truly compelling is her unwavering commitment to authenticity. She doesn't shy away from the messy realities of doubt and disillusionment, yet she also finds moments of unexpected grace and insight along the way. Through her vulnerability and keen insight, she offers a beacon of hope for us readers that are grappling with their own questions of faith.

In "Wishful Thinking," Donna Freitas delivers a powerful testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the enduring search for belief. This is a book that speaks to anyone who has ever questioned their faith, offering solace, understanding, and ultimately, a renewed sense of possibility. For me, being raised by a father that was a Pastor, I completely understand where she is coming from.
Great Read!

Enlightening. Great!
Thanks to author, publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read this book. While I got the book for free it had no bearing on the rating I gave it.