I couldn’t get into ‘What it’s like in Words’ unfortunately and ended up not finishing it, however I think many library patrons will enjoy it, it just wasn’t for me.

Wow was this book stressful for me. I really didn't know what I was getting myself into. Its felt like the same concept of wanting to protect a friend from red flags that you yourself are not taking. And that is exactly what it is like being in an abusive relationship - you know what you need and what's wrong, but you still betray yourself by staying and being gracious to your partner. I had really hard time reading this one, but at the same time it felt cathartic and relatable as much as it was insufferable. This book was a masterpiece and exceptional for a debut work.
I will definitely recommend this book to my girlies. Tough read, but worth it.

Overview: Enola is a writer, though she hasn't turned in work to her writing group in a year. She works at a cafe with her best friend, Ruth, who is always going on interviews for short-lived new jobs. When Enola meets "him" at one of the writing meetings, there's an undeniable chemistry, and Ruth feels magnetically pulled in. Though the relationship is clearly toxic from early on, Enola's complicated family past and struggles with self-esteem keep her coming back. The novel traces Enola's journey as a writer, as a person, and as a friend over around a two year period. Overall: 4

Characters: 4 Enola is that quintessential sad girl "unlikable" heroine that you'll know well if you read these types of books. She struggles with self-esteem and unresolved questions from her past. She feels abandoned by her mother and unstable in her life. She falls for the wrong people, has a tendency to push away those that are trying to help her, and is determined to see the world through the narrow lens she decided on long ago. Enola, of course, is not without sympathetic qualities as she struggles to parse her own existence. She's just trying to figure it all out.

Ruth, Enola's best friend, is the backbone of the story. She's lost in her own way and paints an interesting contrast to Enola. Enola finds Ruth effortless when it comes to fashion and social skills when it comes to herself. They are also opposites when it comes to career, though they work at the same coffee shop. Enola has always known she's going to be a writer, it's just a matter of when. Ruth grew up with artist parents but doesn't have that impulse herself. She's still casting around for her passion.

Not to spoil anything, but one of the most interesting parts of the novel is how both men Enola dates over the course of the book are wrong for her in entirely different ways. It's more of a subplot, but one of these relationships takes on the trope of the "nice guy" and the way they're always cast in such a sympathetic light. Moss reveals how this approach can be just as toxic as the infamous "bad" type.

Plot: 4 This book meanders forward and backwards with the linear unfolding of Enola's relationship with the unnamed man as they go on and off sometimes interrupted by flashes from the present moment. These can be somewhat disorienting and aren't super well-delineated. You start to adapt and figure out more easily how the story bits weave into each other with time. We track Enola facing her past, her writing career, her friendship, and these romantic relationships as she learns a sense of worth. The ending gets a little strange as Moss tries to pull on the idea that's repeated through the book that rests on the multi-verse theory and all the different possibilities that come from choice. She's also, I think, trying to make a play on the idea of Enola being a writer who is even revising in her own memory. This is semi-successful?

Writing: 4 There are some really great lines in this novel. I read it with a highlighter in hand and ended up pulling plenty of great lines from the text. It's a good read, and the pacing is fast. I finished it in two days. While there are certain parts that certainly could've been tighter, I enjoyed Moss's writing and the story overall. It's hard to bring something fresh to exploring a classically toxic relationship, but I was thoroughly intrigued by the shape Enola's particular story would take.

Okay, real talk — Eliza Moss just gets it. This book is like stepping into someone’s beautifully messy mind, where every sentence feels like that perfectly crafted text you never actually send.

You’re getting this review on a day when you wouldn’t normally get a review because if I put this in the queue it will be published long after the book is, and I need all of you to know how great this book is before it comes out. Before I get into the meat of the book, though, quick shout-out to the staff member at Henry Holt & Co. who was at ARSL this fall and told me about this book. The spiel they gave made me pick up the book, and they did not oversell it. This is an incredible book, and I will be recommending it like nobody’s business. I’d also like to thank NetGalley for giving me the ability to access a digital copy of this book as well because having that ebook saved my sanity when I wanted to keep reading but could not comfortably bring the physical ARC with me. Henry Holt & Co. and NetGalley you are my loves <3. Now for the good bit–why you should read this book!

I’ll be perfectly frank–this might be my favorite book I’ve read this year. Eliza Moss’s writing style is simply delectable. There’s something almost dreamlike about the narrative, which is mostly told in retrospective except for brief moments where we exist with the narrator in the aftermath of some mysterious event and except for when we finally catch up to the mysterious event the narrator just experienced and then move through time with her. Even the moments where something absolutely awful is happening, it almost feels like you’re floating through them, like they’re not quite real, which is how imagine it also feels to our narrator, Enola. The whole of the last two years she is sharing with us is somehow both visceral and distant in much the way a particularly vivid dream or nightmare is.

Then there’s the narrative itself–I feel like there is so little I can say about this part without giving away the best surprises of the book, but I will say there was a moment where I read a chapter went “I didn’t expect that,” read the next chapter and immediately went, “holy shit! I didn’t expect that!” And it wasn’t an “I didn’t expect that” in the way that the story was being mean and leading me in a completely false direction or giving me no hints toward the book possibly going the way it suddenly revealed itself too, it was that I didn’t think that would actually happen. Like it was a possibility in the back of my head, but it was not one I took seriously, because there were other things that seemed more likely explanations for what the mysterious event everything hinges around was, and yet! And yet!

And then there are the characters–they are all so incredibly life-like. From Enola to the unnamed boyfriend to the rebound to the best friend to the various side-characters populating the background. They all feel like they could be people that I’ve met or known or loved or hated. Despite floating through a narrative that feels half like a dream, the characters are grounded and real. They make you interested in their lives and care for them, and the story would not be nearly as engrossing as it is if it was not the story of these characters.

If you’re looking for a great piece of literary fiction that explores desire, relationships (romantic, sexual, and platonic), and what it’s like to be a new adult desperate for love, definitely check this book out. If you’re looking for prose that will stay with you and carve itself on your ribcage, then you need this book too. If this book doesn’t go flying off the shelves once it hits them, then people simply don’t know what they’re missing out on. This is a masterpiece.

This felt very Sally Rooney-esque, but ultimately fell a bit flat for me. The trick Moss uses at the beginning of the book -- telling one version of the story then having the character say, no, wait! It was *actually* like this -- fell away in the sloggy middle of the book, only to reappear at the end when Enola starts to deal with the event that split her family. It's a bit of a gimmick, so I get not wanting to use this device all the way through; however, I think the narrative would have been better served using it more, because it would have inserted some ambiguity into the story around Enola's relationship. As is, the reader is left detesting Enola's love interest and wondering why Enola would continue what is so obviously -- to the reader, to Enola's friends, to everyone but Enola -- a toxic relationship.

A week after reading, I had largely forgotten the story.

Thanks to Netgalley for the advance copy.

You know the Christmas episode of The Bear where it’s pure anxiety and chaos and all you wanted to do was take a break and go watch something happy, but then at the end you were like F, that got me in the feels, I really experienced every emotion those characters arced through in the episode? What It’s Like In Words is like that. I hated the process of reading this book because it was NOT fun, but it is a brilliant story that dumps you into chaos and trauma. I forget the names of characters in books I adore and have read dozens of time, but this is sitting squarely in something I will never forget.

It is stressful and painful (and quite frankly, triggering) to read about the emotional abuse and manipulation Enola experiences from her unnamed boyfriend, and the self harm she uses as a coping mechanism. But, as someone who has been in a toxic, emotionally abusive and manipulative relationship, who regularly struggles to convey to others *how* it was so bad, the beauty of this story is how clearly it conveys how we process trauma, how emotional abuse gets you to thoroughly doubt yourself and wonder if you were the problem all along and finding your way out of that darkness.

The timeline is hard to follow, and the lack of quotations makes dialogue feel like a giant run-on sentence lacking pace and control. But the writing style changes with the emotions and when it all starts to make sense, the writing does too, like a Claritin commercial.

I did not enjoy reading this, and I do not want to read it again, but I think I’m better for having experienced this story and for that it’s four stars. Now I need to go read something happy to lower my blood pressure.

I was unable to finish this book and thus will not be posting a full review on my blog. I found the story/language to be so confusing that I had no idea what was happening. Thank you for the opportunity and consideration

Hated her, then realized I kind of was her, then loved her. The parent aspect was so interesting and her relationship with her best friend. Everyone was flawed but also allowed to be.

What It's Like in Words tells the story of Enola and her two-year-long toxic relationship. They met in a writer's group, and he was blunt, enigmatic, and captivating, and she couldn't pull herself away. He was also the king of gaslighting, constantly hung around his ex, and was prone to alarming mood swings. And still, Enola kept pushing past those faults for those rare moments of light.

I love when a book can make me feel strong emotions, and I was so annoyed by both Enola for staying and for her butthead of a boyfriend for his entire personality. Anger-inducing as it was, it did feel realistic and painted the highs and lows of a new relationship very well.

Oh, my dear Enola. This book was like looking into a Time Machine at my 20 year old self. I fear many people will have similar stories and relate to this. Enolas grief and trauma manifested itself in self sabatoging ways. I love that HE was simply just that, HE. That small stylistic choice makes this book feel even more personal. I was completely consumed by this story and deeply invested in all of the characters. It definitely is a quieter book, but it definitely packs a punch.

TW // SPOILERS AHEAD.
.
.
.
.
.

My only gripe was with the section depicting acts of domestic violence. It didn’t seem to be taken as seriously as it should have been. Although their actions post-event are all too accurate, it was never brought up or touched on again, even when Enola finally came to her senses and left him. The emotional abuse and manipulation is discussed, but never the physical events.

Thanks to NetGalley and Macmillan for the advanced reader copy.

I hung in for as long as I could but, even acknowledging that this is literary fiction and that not all characters need to be likeable, I struggled with understanding why Enola was with "him." There was nothing redeeming about him; even when he was being nice to her he was making fun of her. It got to the point that I couldn't stand spending time with her either,

Official rating: 2.5

This was a solid 3 stars until, literally, the last 5 pages. It dropped half a star because I am genuinely confused on what the heck happened in the end.

I enjoyed how the book was set up. It was told as someone in the present reciting a story of the past. It was interesting. It did take me a minute to get used to because the retelling of the past did not use quotations for dialogue but just descriptions of what was said. If that makes sense. It was cool and different.

I felt for Enola. She really gave us the perspective of the feeling we always have of “why don’t they just leave?” I felt like I could understand her thought process while simultaneously knowing she deserved so much better. Her relationship with *him* hurt my heart, for her. *He* was a terrible person. The biggest gaslighter and so insecure. I actually really like that he remains nameless the entire book. Also, we all need a Ruth in our lives…

The truth about her dad was not something I would have seen coming. And how it tied into her feelings on that final day was eye opening. I am so glad she finally stood up for herself but I do wish she would’ve throat punched him cus it was the least he deserved.

Again, I liked the book until the very end. I really can’t figure out if what I read was a trick or if maybe one of the other “drafts” is what happened? The poem thing where it tied in the books name felt very random and didn’t make any sense to me. Would’ve been a very solid 3 stars if it wasn’t for that.

After meeting an arrogant writer in her writer's group, Enola falls into a toxic situationship that she has trouble leaving over the next two years. Readers familiar with abusive relationships may find this a difficult read at times.

Enola is an unpublished writer in her late twenties. She works at a cafe part time with her best friend, Ruth, to make ends meet. When the story opens she is at her writers' group meeting where they share chapters and receive feedback from one another. It's been some time since Enola had much to share, though. One of the regular members invites a friend to come along, but the group finds him arrogant and rude. He and Enola end up on the same bus on their way home and they begin a toxic romance.

I kept waiting for this story to reveal something, but it felt like a continual build to me. The writing is good, and parts of the story are compelling. I never felt connected to the characters, though, which made it hard to say I enjoyed it. The story goes back in forth in time, without any notice, and has a lot of Enola's inner monologue about her childhood, the loss of her father, and her heartbreak. There were also no quotation marks indicating dialogue, which takes a bit to become accustomed to. It is not my favorite genre, so I am sure that had an impact on my enjoyment level, so if this genre is your thing, give it a try.

Thank you to NetGalley, the author and publisher for the advanced copy in exchange for my honest review.

I loovveee when I'm able to get both an advanced print AND audio copy, having both to compare and reference is ideal! So right off the bat a huge thank you to Eliza Moss, Henry Holt & Company, MacMillan Audio, and NetGalley for the opportunity to read early!

Gaslighting meets our (funny I say "our" bc I'm in the US and they weren't but it still fits) patriarchal society meets coming to terms with someone you love having qualities you don't - and the possibility those qualities are their dominant ones meets the dualities of wanting. Written beautifully, it didn't take long for me to get through this book. What felt like a behind the scenes look at being a writer was just a bonus.

FK THIS ONE HURT!
If there is any tinge of pain from an ex, BEWARE(Or am I just projecting? I'm in therapy. This isn't about me)!

This one really got me. Projecting or not, I don't think it will be difficult to identify with Enola. I found it near impossible to not self-reflect. Whether it's as serious as an ex spouse or as simple as an ex crush, if you really think hard enough isn't there <i>someoneee</i> that you find your thoughts wandering with? Were they the one that got away? You were so happy then... You guys always had so much fun together... Why did you end things, anyway? Wonder how they're doing now...
Familiar rabbit hole?
If not, maybe recalling a shitty ex you had will come more easily? Weird how you could have been so mad at him back then, he's so cute. And he's probably changed by now... Plus, I've changed! It'll be different this time.

If you enjoyed this, I'd also suggest Scaffolding by Lauren Elkin, My Husband by Maud Ventura and Liars by Sara Manguso.

This was such a raw and honest depiction of an emotionally abusive relationship. It was frustrating to see Enola constantly go back to her toxic boyfriend and I found myself screaming in my head "please leave him!" but as she opens up more about her childhood trauma I was able to understand why she acted the way she did. I still find myself thinking about this book a couple of days after finishing it. The writing was absolutely beautiful.

´So much of my happiness depended on his expression’

Enola is an aspiring writer in her 20s when she meets an older guy in a writer’s group. They start a whirlwind romance where Enola is so caught up in that she can’t see straight. Despite her best friend Ruby’s cautions, she can’t see that B is a giant walking red flag who belittles and gaslights her at every opportunity.

Depicted in an almost stream-of-consciousness by a slightly older and wiser Enola of the two years with B, What It’s Like Words can sometimes be a frustrating read. Enola’s inability to see B’s lies and terrible treatment of her, her inability to see how her father really was can make the reader feel like they want to reach out shake Enola to her sense like her best friend tries to do. The length and too many details made me almost want to quit the book several times but I really liked it by the end.

Thank you so much for the ARC!

Sometimes debuts truly just sweep me off my feet... I found myself reflected in Elona as she navigates this toxic relationship. Moss handles narcissistic abuse and gaslighting with sensitivity, but also in a way that is gut-wrenching and painfully familiar to those of us who have experienced this in relationships ourselves. The way Moss weaves the narrative had me so swept up that I felt I was Elona herself, falling for the red flags and obsession. It was difficult to continue reading at times, but in the best way, because it's extremely accurate. I would say know your trigger warnings before reading, but this is a must-read for its stellar writing and brutal honesty.

If you are ready for your next great read, pick up What It's Like in Words. I could not put this book down.