The plot is unique but it wasn’t really about ghosts
- there are people and young adults that would probably love this because they need help with some of the emotions

I skimmed a lot of it after the first 1/4

This book I ate up. There’s a lot of moving parts in this but I enjoyed the whole idea of it. Definitely plan on buying this once it comes out.*full review will be up once book comes out due to author asking to wait*

I am impressed by this book and Shelly's debut. What a great story full of grief, life, death, and more. The book made me both laugh and cry.

Wow, wow, wow! What an incredible debut novel.
I enjoyed everything about this book. One of the greatest strengths about this book is the representation; LGBTQIA+, grief, religion, and love.
Rules for Ghosting does so well in its portrayal of relationships. From the friendships, family, and romantic connections. Everything was depicted with a sensitivity and realism that resonate deeply as a reader. It has so much depth and heart from the very beginning. Very well written and a must read!

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC!

Star rating: 5 out of 5 stars!

Ezra Friedman sees ghosts, which made growing up in a funeral home complicated. It might have been easier if his grandfather’s ghost didn’t give him scathing looks of disapproval as he went through a second, HRT-induced puberty, or if he didn’t have the pressure of all those relatives—living and dead—judging every choice he makes. It’s no wonder that Ezra runs as far away from the family business as humanly possible.

But when the floor of his dream job drops out from under him and his mother uses the family Passover seder to tell everyone she’s running off with the rabbi’s wife, Ezra finds himself back in the thick of it. With his parents’ marriage imploding and the Friedman Family Memorial Chapel on the brink of financial ruin, Ezra agrees to step into his mother’s shoes and help out . . . which means long days surrounded by ghosts that no one else can see.

And then there’s his unfortunate crush on Jonathan, the handsome funeral home volunteer . . . who just happens to live downstairs from Ezra’s new apartment . . . and the appearance of the ghost of Jonathan’s gone-too-soon husband, Ben, who is breaking every spectral rule that Ezra knows. Because Ben can speak. He can move. And as Ezra tries to keep his family together and his heart from getting broken, he realizes that there’s more than one way to be haunted—and more than one way to become a ghost.

A brilliant dive into the thin line between life and death, messy but real family dynamics, and love. Honestly, I picked this book up and couldn't put it down. Highly recommend this! ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for the advanced digital reader's copy (ARC) in exchange for an honest review!

My first ARC review (thanks, NetGalley).
Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore is somewhat of a rom com with a paranormal twist on the surface, but really is about grief, family dynamics, growing up queer/trans and Jewish traditions.
I enjoyed this book because I personally really identified with the main character, Ezra. Although I am neither trans or Jewish, his internal monologues could be taken straight from my brain. I think I really identified with him as the Older Sibling who always had to be the responsible one (very Luisa from Encanto vibes).
I really liked the dialogue, the diverse cast of characters, and there's a dog! I did think it felt too long and really took me a while to get through, although I can't pinpoint a specific reason why. I just found myself asking "I'm enjoying this story, why is it dragging?"
Overall I'd give this a 4.25 and recommend it to fans of romcoms, family dramas, LGBTQIA+ community, and anyone wanting to learn more about Jewish holidays/traditions.
The book comes out August 20th and is a debut by this author.

Oh my gosh! I knew this looked like a fun premise but I didn't expect to laugh or love this book as much as I did!!! I think I basically downloaded the ebook and read it in basically one sitting in a span of about four hours. Definitely going to preorder this one. If only some retailer gets some kind of special edition...

Ok this is going to sound like SO MUCH and I think that's why it was such a funny breeze! We have an MC who is a trans guy who sees ghosts. At the Passover seder, his mom announces that she's running away with the rabbi's wife. Ezra agrees to help out at the funeral home that his family owns, which seems like a not-great idea considering the number of ghosts? Oh and his hot housemate is the widower of the rabbi's son, who is a ghost now.

Ezra was so unexpectedly funny, and I felt for his pain and trauma as he tried to keep everything afloat. I think I'm in love with Jonathan. And I think that some of Ezra's character growth healed me too.

DEFINITELY worth a read, and I can't wait to read another book from this author.

Thank you to Netgalley and Ballantine for this wonderful ARC that I loved so much.

Content Warnings: Death and Mourning; Birth Scenes (Semi-Graphic), Gender Dysphoria/Body Dysmorphia,

For those sex averse, there is one semi-explicit sex scene and some fade-to-black.

I loved this book and how many narratives it weaves together. I most enjoyed the insight into Jewish traditions, particularly funeral traditions, and the work of doulas around both life and death the most. These were all critical to the book’s plot and understanding the characters, especially Ezra, our transmasc MC. Ezra, who can see ghosts, grew up in the funeral business but finds himself drawn to the queer-life-affirming business, whether in the form of being a doula or teaching yoga at a queer community center. He is overly hard on himself, burdened with his secret, familial bonds and duties, and queer identity, and yet always striving to be more and do more. I was invested and wanted him to succeed.

Even beyond Ezra, Shore succeeds in creating authentically flawed characters while also depicting diversity in queer representation. The characters and their situations were allowed to be messy and gray. I think the best example is when Ezra’s mother drops the bombshell that she has been having a lesbian affair with the Rabbi’s wife. would have been easy to push a sugar-coated narrative where everyone is immediately okay with it because they are queer friendly – but, instead, watching the effects on each family member and how it affects them all is much more realistic and satisfying. It’s not that the affair was a lesbian one that was the issue – it was the affair at all, the breach of trust and ramifications on a tight-knit, family-run business.

Overall, I found this book lovely and life-affirming and would gladly read another of Shore’s works in the future.

What a great debut by Shelly Jay Shore! This is a beautiful love story that explores grief and saying goodbye to loved ones. It's learning to love again and while the ghost element is a big part of it it is well done and a worthy read.

I absolutely fell head over heels in love with this story. From the characters to the setting to the feelings it elicited within me… This was an amazing look at not only the dynamics of a funeral home but the dynamics of grief and simple human interaction as well. I was invested from the first page but by the last I felt as if I was apart of this world myself: These characters became comfort characters for me.

Will be featuring as a mortuary Monday post on my grim readers book cult insta account

I loved the premise of a guy who can see ghosts having to work at his families funeral home after his mom surprises everyone by running off with their rabbi’s wife. Eli also has a crush on his new downstairs neighbor Ben, but keeps encountering the ghost of his husband. A really deep character study in family, grief and relationships, but I felt the ending got drawn out a tad.

This book had a lot of moving parts and subplots that were woven together really well. It felt equal parts paranormal (ghost viewings), family drama (between parents as well as inter-sibling relationships), coming of age (changing jobs, moving homes, Ezra coming fully into himself), romance, found family (Ezra’s new roommates), workplace struggles, and more. It was a lot happening but Ezra was at the heart of it all so it worked well for me. I really appreciated that his trans and Jewish identity was shown as a part of who he is, and how normalized queerness as well as Jewish culture was throughout the story.

Thank you to NetGalley and Random House Publishing for the ARC.

This book is a wholehearted 5/5 stars. It touched my heart in such a deep and unforgettable way. In the first few chapters, I was very surprised to find many parts of my identity reflected back at me. Ashkenazi, culturally Jewish, queer, and grandchild of a Holocaust survivor from Poland. I didn’t realize how deeply imbedded some of these facets of my identity were in every aspect of my life until I made my way through this book. I felt my heart breaking with Ezra at so many points throughout the story. I often found tears streaming down face, feeling as though the words on the page were describing innermost thoughts. Shelly Jay Shore wrote masterfully- balancing both inner dialogue and discussion beautifully. The frequent use of Yiddish and Hebrew without definitions or explanations felt incredibly important and validating. I truly feel grateful that I took a chance on what I thought might be a fun paranormal book with Jewish and queer representation, and turned into a book I will certainly cherish for a long time to come.

Thanks Netgalley for allowing me to read this book. Ezra has family issues that most people don't understand. His family runs a funeral home which would be ok., except Ezra talks to the dead. This book was a quick read

Rules for Ghosting is a beautiful, nuanced book. There’s family drama, family business issues, and oh yeah our main character can see ghosts! This book has so much going on and is perfect for those looking for a deeper spooky season read!

Wow, this was a fantastic book and I am so glad I got an early copy.
As soon as I read the blurb about Ezra (trans MMC) who is a psychic who can see ghosts and trying to figure out his life when suddenly his life implodes and his mom is running away with a lover and leaving his father, he has to go back to the family business at a funeral home and he also found a guy he likes and he might see the ex-husband ghost. If this doesn't pull you in, I do not know what would.
There is so much to uncover as we follow Ezra as he tries to navigate his life and trying to keep his family together. There is great exploration of life, death and what happens to the people left behind. There were tender moments that made me cry and at times I just wanted to hug Ezra and Jonathan.

Do you ever get literally 4% into a book and just KNOW it's going to be special? Because that's exactly what happened with this book for me. Four percent was all it took for me to know that I was going to love it, and boy did I love it.

Also it is completely wild to me that this is a debut. I can't imagine the things that Shelly Jay Shore has written before we got this gem of a story, because what the hell. It's such a fascinating, refreshing concept for a romance that I stopped in my search for my next read immediately to pick it up.

From the first page, I understood Ezra's need to be the one to fix things with his siblings. The one to take on all of their problems and make it all better for them, while holding onto that stress or responsibility himself. Feeling like you're the one person that keeps the family together and convincing yourself your happy about it? Yeah, been there. It was so wild to see this on the page and brought me to tears several times, because I was that sibling for most of my childhood.

I love a messy family dynamic, and boy is the Friedman family messy. Even their ghosts have drama, and I ate it up. As messy and angry as they all are, they are also so full of love for one another and I just could not help but root for them to get it together. I'm a huge found family truther and this? Oh, this found family is everything. Ezra's initial reluctance to let them get close made me stop and have a long look in the mirror, because am I this book's main character? Everything was just so close to home it got me good.

And Jonathan. Sweet, sweet, Jonathan. I loved him immediately and he only became more perfect as the story went on. Equally stubborn and soft (but always so full of love he made me sob), he was the perfect counterbalance to Ezra's instincts to shut it down and bolt. They fit so well together and it was just so lovely.

This review is a novel in itself now, but Rules for Ghosting is a book about dying, living, grieving and finding yourself and your community through it all. I silently wept through probably the last hour of the book and it is easily one of my favorite things I have ever read. Honestly might be my top of the year and and it's only May.

Please keep this one on your radar.

Absolutely adored this book, from top to bottom. The characters were rich and authentic and relatable, the story was compelling and fascinating, and entire world that Shore weaves in this story is so easy to get lost within. I've been telling everyone I know to read this book, and I cannot wait for it to be published so that even more folks can fall in love with Ezra just like I did. A+++!

***Review will be posted after the pub date as requested in the ebook file. Please let me know if you would like a review posted earlier than that!***

While I reflect on this book, one word keeps coming to mind...lovely. Rules for Ghosting handles complicated grief, family, and romance so tenderly.

Shore has a delightful knack for writing diverse characters. As a trans man, I loved the care with which the book explores each trans character's experience. There are trans struggles, but there's also so much trans joy!

I started this book pretty unfamiliar with Jewish customs, including death rituals. I really enjoyed learning through characters that I relate to. Instead of spirituality being a source of trauma, it is deeply interwoven with healing.

In sum, Rules for Ghosting is lovely! I look forward to reading more by this author.

Thank you so much to NetGalley for the chance to read an ARC for free. I'm leaving this review of my own accord.

I loved this gorgeous, queer, Jewish romantasy and didn't want it to end. Ezra sees ghosts, which made growing up in the family funeral home a problem. Now he's at the other end of the life-death cycle, working as a birth doula and teaching yoga. When his mom and her lover, the rabbi's wife, come out at Passover and set up house together, chaos ensues, complicated even more by the fact that Ezra's just moved into a new apartment haunted by the ghost of his mom's lover's son. And Ezra finds himself falling for the ghost's partner Jonathan, who is involved in chevra kadisha (burial society) work at the funeral home and lives in the same building as Ezra and his found family and friends. There are loads of other great characters, including Ezra's siblings, and I appreciated the depth of each of them, and the learning and development of many. Ezra and Jonathan work to make their relationship work, and it's nice to read about that work in a positive way.