Honestly I thought ghosts were going to be bigger in this book. Instead it seems Ezra is haunted by his own family and their drama.

I felt like this was a little sporadic and I wish maybe like one less thing had happened in the book. I feel like it ended up being a jumble of chaotic ideas that never got fleshed out. But some people’s lives are just like that.

Thank you Netgalley for this ARC for my unbiased opinion.

Do you see dead people? Ezra does. Ezra is our bi-trans main character who navigates messy family dynamics and a wonderful found family in this rom-comish paranormal book. This book mostly takes place in a funeral home setting with talk of death, life, romance, queer community, jewish familiies and ghosts. I thought it was a cozy ghost story but it was much deeper than that. LIfe and loss, family secrets and sexuality are heavy topics in this queer romance. If you love messy family dynamics, funny found families and queer romances with paranormal elements, this book is for you.

This book was really multifaceted. It touches on grief, love, the trans experience, the jewish experience, complicated family dynamics, and so much more. Oh—the main character also sees ghosts. But that detail felt secondary to the story. I really enjoyed this and was sucked in pretty quickly.

Thank you to Netgalley and Random House Ballantine for providing me with an early copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. For more book content, follow me @romantic.ally_ on instagram

Thank you to Netgalley and Random House Ballantine for providing me with an early copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. For more book contact, follow me @romantic.ally_ on instagram

This book was really multifaceted. It touches on grief, love, the trans experience, the jewish experience, complicated family dynamics, and so much more. Oh—the main character also sees ghosts. But that detail felt secondary to the story. I really enjoyed this and was sucked in pretty quickly.

Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore is a wonderfully queer Jewish paranormal romance. Ezra Friedman is the trans son of a Jewish funeral home director who’s always hidden his ability to see ghosts. These days, he is happy to be a yoga instructor, doula, and perpetual responsible middle child. That is until his mother reveals her affair with the rabbi’s wife at the Passover seder and Ezra steps in to help his family and the funeral home. He is balancing the books and more ghostly encounters than he would like at work. Home doesn’t give him much of a break either, after all, his new cute Jewish neighbor, Jonathan...and the ghost of his recently deceased husband live right downstairs. Ezra has to manage his relationships with ghosts living and dead if he wants to finally settle into his life.
I highly recommend this deeply specific novel. When people tell you there is relatability and beauty in specificity, they are talking about stories like these. I look forward to everything else Shelly Jay Shore has in store for readers.

I really enjoyed this! The writing was super fun and I really enjoyed learning about traditional Jewish funeral rites through Ezra and his family. Most (not all, there is one character I have major beef with) were incredibly fun and seemed like people I would be friends with in my own life. The diversity of characters, especially the abundance of queer characters was really refreshing to read about. While this book revolves around the queer characters within it, the message isn’t how traumatic it is to be a queer person, but how being queer comes with difficulties, but it is worth it in the end as you get to be your true self. Love to see it! It does kind of drag toward the end I think. I’m not sure if this needed to be 400 pages necessarily as I felt there were many scenes that felt a little repetitive. Also, while I appreciated the throughline of how as the eldest sibling, Ezra is constantly the mediator and the toll that takes on him, it started to become a little ham fisted by the end. I could feel that Ezra was exhausted by his role within the family by like page 50, so by page 400 I felt the point was already well established. Overall, I really enjoyed this and will recommend it to all my queer ghost loving friends.

Thanks to NetGalley & Random House Group Publishing - Ballantine for the eARC!

This book starts off a bit slow but as you get to know the MC you feel a deeper connection with his life and his struggles. I found myself deeply rooting for Ezra to believe in himself. There was so much that went on in this story that it sort of felt like there was never a dull moment. His family was lovable but also very exhausting. The story made it easy to feel invested and dealt with difficult subjects quite well. This was a good read and I definitely can’t wait to see what this author writes next.

Rules for Ghosting revolves around Ezra, a Jewish trans man who just so happens to see dead people. This book had great representation of trans and queer people, but unfortunately everything else fell somewhat flat for me. This book at once had too much and not enough going on. There were so many roommates and other characters who blended together, long sections of dialogue and description that could have easily been cut down, and side plots that distracted from the overall story. I think there is certainly a type of reader this would be a hit for, but it just didn’t quite land with me!
Thank you NetGalley and publisher for the advance copy of this novel in exchange for my review!

So many feelings with this book. So much family drama and interconnected drama that they didn’t even know about. Taught my Jewish husband about a minor holiday his family doesn’t observe. That holiday had a lot of drama and uncomfortable truths told on it too.
Ezra is trans and he sees dead people. The dead people part is hard for him to disclose cause you know not everyone can see or believe in ghosts.
It gets complicated when he sees the ghost of the guy he is interested in’s husband. Loved all the relationships and the friend group was amazing!
It was interesting reading about the process and ritual before burial.
This was such a great book!

I should have known it was coming when the dedication to the book reminded eldest daughters (I am) to exhale (I did) and I felt better in a nonspecific but significant way. Then I started reading, and wow did this book cause some stress (but I’m an eldest daughter, everything does). Ezra spends the entire book carrying his world, his family’s world, and his friends/clients/LGBTQIAP+ community of Providence on his shoulders and I really felt for him. Literally. Had to exhale a few more times while reading this.

However, when all is said and done, I did really enjoy this book and I would recommend reading it! It was my first transgender romance, and while I have no frame of reference, it felt like it was done well and it won’t be my last. I’ve been making a conscious effort to step into unfamiliar territory and learn this summer, and what better way to do that than through a book? (Ok, there are probably better ways but this is a start). I loved the funeral home setting and Ezra’s ability to see ghosts as a way to add context and history. Jonathan was the perfect dreamy and patient love interest. I did resonate with the eldest daughter aspects of the book and how that often translates to family manager. This book was messy, and sweet, and I think the found family aspect will resonate with anyone who has ever had to build their life in a new way, no matter the reason.

For anyone who lived in the young adult section of their synagogue library during the Hebrew school/Sunday school weekly rotation, this book should be required reading. It has the comfort of tradition, warmth of community, and zaniness of being a member of the tribe that I always feel when I’m immersed Judaism, and it just felt familiar despite describing experiences very different than my own.

Thanks to NetGalley and Random House for the eARC!

Rules for Ghosting was such a sweet (but not saccharine!!) romance. Even with the paranormal twist, it felt so real and grounded. This book is perfect for EARLY early fall when you can detect the slightest chill in the air.

It’s not spooky, but with an old Victorian home, ghosts, and a funeral home, it definitely gives off those cozy spooky season vibes. It’s a great one to pick up if you love a romance with some family drama thrown in the mix!

I had such a good time with Rules for Ghosting. Ezra is so relatable to me, especially in the way he loves his friends and family. This book covers many heavy topics including family dynamics, coming out, the effects of secrets, and so much more in ways that have levity, comfort, and the ability to feel like a real family's conversation. The queer and trans rep in this book is truly beautiful in how it shows real experience in building your community, a community that includes both chosen and blood family. While there is romantic and sexual love featured in this book, the true stand-out form of love in this book is the platonic love shown throughout the novel. Ezra's relationship with his friends and siblings strengthened throughout, but they are the relationships that will stick with me as I continue to reflect on this book.

Thank you to NetGalley and Random House Publishing Group - Ballantine for a digital ARC of Rules for Ghosting. Check this book out now!

Thank you NetGalley and Ballantine | Dell for this ARC Copy! 3.25 Stars

I really enjoyed this book and it does a really good job with the LGBTQ+ and mental health character representation.

From the moment we dive into this story there is a lot going on at all times, and a lot of time spent in the chaotic mind of the main character Ezra. The story is jam packed with all the family drama, death, grief, betrayals, divorce, job uncertainty, and some occasional ghosts, which were surprisingly the least dramatic part of the book somehow. All this set in Ezra's family funeral home.

There was not a moment where something wild wasn't happening, and at times it felt like it was just so much going on for me to follow, and that is really my only complaint about this book. It made it hard for my ADHD self to stay interested in the drama because it was everchanging and hard to keep track of, AND even as I type this I see how that was probably the point...

I really enjoyed getting to know the characters and watching them come out of their shells, and how they were growing to fit together as two broken pieces.

How wonderful! A cute, spooky romance. Just in time for the fall, which is perfect! i will be recommending this to my audience.

I loved the story, the world building and meeting the different characters. I felt completely immersed in the story and couldn't stop reading it. The cover is what orginal made me want to pick it up and then the title. This book was so good, fun, and honestly a really good read.

I was so excited for a ghosty story with great representation but unfortunately this story fell completely flat for me. There was way too much going on in one story but also nothing happening at the same time somehow. Long drawn out dialogues would end up being pointless which I didn’t realize until chapters later. There was so much time spent on details that ultimately didn’t matter and added nothing to the story. I wanted to like this book so badly and while I did enjoy some of the characters, it was 400 pages of over detailed scenarios when the real story could have been so much shorter and more interesting. I hate giving negative reviews but I spent a lot of time on this one thinking I’d be happy in the end. On a positive note, I can see why some liked this story! It just wasn’t for me.

Thank you so much to Netgalley, Shelly Jay Shore, and Random House Publishing for providing this free ARC. This is my honest review! This published on August 20th.

This debut offers a heartfelt story, though not as light and mystical as expected. Harper returns to her hometown after her grandmother’s death, only to inherit more than just old traditions—she’s bound to her family’s ancient magic and the spirits of the land. As she uncovers her grandmother’s secrets with the help of Elio, a botanist, Harper must confront the grief and unresolved magic standing in her way. The pacing drags at times, especially with the intricate magic system, but the emotional exploration of family, heritage, and self-discovery shines through. While not perfect, this reflective tale is full of warmth and hope, and its message about embracing both roots and new paths lingers long after the final page.

👻 This ARC was provided to me free of charge in exchange for my honest opinion. Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore-Ezra Friedman can see dead people, which is an extreme occupational hazard when your family owns a funeral home. He returns to his childhood home to help the struggling family business despite his complicated relationship with it. Surprisingly he finds that it’s not the ghosts causing him trouble—it’s the living.
It’s slightly awkward when Ezra’s hot neighbor shows up for Passover seder, but his mom steals the show when she announces she’s running off with the rabbi’s wife... who just so happens to be the mother of his hot neighbor’s dead husband.

This book delivers on all fronts—beautiful, found family relationships with witty banter, a reluctant love story, lots of self-discovery and exploration, and it is packed with LGBTQ representation. Lucky for you, it’s out on August 20th! 👻

Ballantine eARC
I fell quickly for Ezra in this book. He was easy to root for and super interesting because he also sees dead people. I liked how this book took a dive into the funeral world - and a Jewish one at that. I think the darkness of those times played so well with the lightness with Ezra's family and found family. I loved Jonathan and his openness and sweet nature. This book also delves into what it means to be a trans Jewish man and it was honest and raw at times. There is also the messiness of life and relearning how to function after familial changes occur. It was a beautiful and vulnerable story that captured so much, yet was also just enough to keep this story full of heart, forgiveness, and hope.

This book is absolutely stunning. Shelly Jay Shore has crafted a believable, lovable, messy main character in Ezra, and the cast of characters that populate his life are so charming and equally lovable. I cried, I swooned, I fell in love!