I’ve wondered for a few years now if I feel called to have biological children. After the graphic pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum body horror that is the first half of this book, now I’m pretty sure the answer is no 😅

Part body horror, part psychological thriller, and part ghost story, Dearest follows Flora as she struggles to adjust to new motherhood while her husband is deployed. Driven to her breaking point by stress and sleep deprivation, Flora reaches out to her estranged mother. But even with her mother’s presence, Flora continues to lose her grip on reality, becoming more and more convinced that someone or something is trying to harm her baby girl. But is baby Iris actually in danger, or is it all in Flora’s head?

This was a wild ride. While I could have done without the body horror in the first half of the novel, I was fascinated by the relationship dynamic between Flora and her mother and the unique ways in which the novel dealt with generational trauma. I also loved the psychological aspect of the novel; just like Flora herself, readers are constantly tasked with wondering whether something nefarious is really going on here or if we’re simply witnessing the unraveling of a postpartum woman’s mind. And that ending line? Chef’s kiss.

Wow, wow, wow! I'm not a mother but I've found myself really drawn to books with motherhood as a big plot point, specifically books within the speculative genres: horror, thrillers, etc. Even without kids, it's not difficult to imagine how lonely and terrifying and stressful being a new mom must be - your body changing, your life not being solely your own anymore, the need to constantly put another person & their needs before your own. The exhaustion alone would be enough to horrify anyone, but on the pages with this, the deeper feelings of dread and fear really seem to stand out. I love the "is there or isn't there?" debate when trying to figure out what's wrong in the story or with a specific character, but I'll admit that reading someone be gaslight and disbelieved is a little grating after awhile. Still, enjoyed this immensely and will be grabbing a physical copy soon!

In her gripping debut, the author weaves a chilling tale that masterfully explores the complexities of motherhood, estrangement, and the insidious grip of family secrets. Flora, a new mom navigating the tumultuous waters of early motherhood, is beautifully portrayed as she grapples with loneliness and the haunting shadows of her past. With her husband deployed and her once-bustling home now eerily quiet, Flora's fragile mental state is expertly depicted, drawing readers into her increasingly unstable reality.

When Flora's estranged mother unexpectedly appears at her door, the tension escalates. Their fraught relationship is palpable, and the unresolved issues between them add a compelling layer to the narrative. The author skillfully crafts an atmosphere of dread that permeates Flora's home, leaving readers questioning the true nature of her mother’s intentions. Is she there to help, or does her presence bring something far more sinister?

As the story unfolds, Flora’s descent into paranoia becomes all too real, with strange occurrences that blur the line between reality and hallucination. The pacing is relentless, and the mounting suspense keeps readers on edge, reminiscent of the works of Grady Hendrix and Ashley Audrain. The underlying themes of generational trauma and the weight of unspoken truths resonate deeply, adding emotional depth to the horror elements.

What truly sets thus bookapart is its exploration of maternal instincts in the face of danger. Flora's fierce love for her daughter, Iris, propels her to confront her fears, even as she grapples with the possibility that her own mother might be a conduit for something malevolent. The climax is both heart-stopping and thought-provoking, leaving readers questioning not only the nature of evil but also the lengths a mother will go to protect her child.

In conclusion, this is a fast-paced and frightening debut that masterfully blends psychological horror with poignant family dynamics. It’s a must-read for anyone intrigued by the dark corners of motherhood and the secrets that bind us. This book will linger in your mind long after the final page is turned. Highly recommended!

Wow!! This is a great debut. There are some trigger warnings to be aware of. Postpartum difficulties, anxiety, depression, mental illness, child death, suicide, and mental health to name a few. I was immediately pulled into this one. I thought the characters were well developed and the plot flowed. It was really well written too. I was never bored. There's a lot that happens in this one and it definitely kept me on the edge of my seat. Some major creep factors too.

Thank you to the publisher and netgalley for the gifted copy in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

WOW. First I must say you will absolutely need to check the trigger warnings for this one, it deals with difficulties during pregnancy and has a bit of gore in it, as well as a supernatural theme surrounding all of it. With that said, this book was horrifying! It definitely kept me engaged the whole way through and I definitely wanted to see how things were going to progress. I read this one pretty quickly and although it was a bit scary and gross it was definitely engaging and written in a way that has you in a rush to know all the outcomes!

Dearest is build up of years of trauma and the relationship it defines of mother and daughter. Incoming trigger warning.

With Flora a new mom and all alone as her husband is deployed, in the face of exhaustion and sleep paralysis, we see her reminiscing her relationship with her mother. The story is full of desperation and dread, as Flora starts to turn to a childhood comfort- as the reader, it left me wondering the spiral of her mental state and leaving the reader to question is she losing her mind. I really enjoyed the writing in this, especially the detail in the motherhood, and the way Flora constantly questions the way she mothers. The horror in the first half is very light and never quite pulls off creepy. And then you hit part 3 and can’t put the book down.

A haunting tale that gives a truthful voice to early motherhood and pregnancy. And specifically that of being a mother and being alone. I loved how the story kept unraveling as the story continued. Not entirely predictable but every transition was cohesive, like every moment was meant to be there. A few of these moments will stick with me and not always with the best imagery. And you couldn’t ask anymore of a horror novel than that.

Thank you Netgalley for the e-arc of this book!
Mullholand books is putting out bangers this year and is easily becoming one of my favorite publishers. This engrossing tale does not hold its readers hand, in fact it pushes you in and you are not given grace til the very end

Flora is struggling. She loves her newborn daughter, Iris, more than life itself, but things are hard. Her husband is deployed, leaving her to care for the baby alone 24 hours a day, and she's exhausted and overwhelmed and feels like she's beginning to lose her grip on reality. In a moment of weakness and nostalgia, she contacts her estranged mother, desperate for help. And then her mother shows up on her doorstep...

I was so impressed with Dearest. In a growing subgenre of horror focused on motherhood, Jacquie Walters' debut stands out due to her haunting prose, bold narrative choices, and impeccable plotting -- and one twist that made me gasp. Dearest is so engrossing, and it's impossible to stop reading as we spiral right alongside Flora. What starts as a deeply psychological character study about postpartum depression and a dysfunctional mother-daughter relationship evolves into something much scarier as Waters explores the complexities of new motherhood, dangerous family secrets, and generational trauma through a supernatural lens. She perfectly captures what those first weeks after giving birth can feel like for a new mom: suffocating, exhausting, overwhelming, hallucinatory, and full of a love so powerful, so all-encompassing, that it's almost frightening. Some of the scenes in this book, and several specific images, are going to stick with me for a long time.

Dearest is one hell of a ride, from start to finish, a novel that is just as impactful as it is disturbing and upsetting. Thank you to Mulholland Books for the complimentary reading opportunity.

TW/CW: Language, anxiety, depression, toxic family relationships, postpartum depression, death by suicide, death of child, attempted murder, mental illness

*****SPOILERS*****
About the book:
Flora is a new mom enamored of her baby girl, Iris, even if she arrived a few weeks early. With her husband still deployed, Flora navigates the newborn stage alone. But as the sleepless nights pass in the loneliness of their half-empty home, the edges of her reality begin to blur.

Just as Flora becomes convinced she is losing her mind, a surprising guest shows up: Flora’s own mother, to whom she hasn’t spoken in years. Can they mend their fraught relationship? Or is there more Flora’s mother isn’t telling her about the events that led to their estrangement?
Release Date: September 17th, 2024
Genre: Horror
Pages: 304
Rating: ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐

What I Liked:
1. Writing style was good
2. Story flowed
3. Characters were well written
4. Tons of crazy things happened

What I Didn't Like:
1. Stories using the mental illness woman as a plot

Overall Thoughts:
{{Disclaimer: I write my review as I read}}

Jodie is so terrible. She laughs at Flora for wanting to disconnect from wifi because a man hacked into the baby monitor. It's very rational to be upset that somebody's been watching her baby for so long.

Love that Jodie is reading Yellow Wallpaper.

I'm seriously wondering if Jodie is trying to gaslight Flora and trying to take the baby.

Omg omg omg Jodie is feeding Iris on her breast...... Omg omg!!!!

Yeah, no I would not be trying to help Jodie into the house. She is losing it! She is breast feeding her granddaughter and then goes outside to burn a tusk. Girl you can still call 911 without wifi! Get help to yourself.

I thought they had no electricity so how is she having a hot bath. Did she just know that her water heater would work? I get that she maybe has a gas water heater so maybe that's why it's working.

I'm sorry I just find it creepy that her mother is breastfeeding the baby and now she's rubbing her shoulders while she's in a bath. This all just seems so creepy and overstepping so many boundaries.

Oh my God and now she's trying to kill her...

---- her mother is dead.... What....!

Ohhhhh Flora had a twin that drained but Michael didn't see it so he wasn't sure what happened. He also covered the story of what happened to protect Jodie.

This all took a twist and Flora lost a leg and is pregnant. Like it was all insane.

So this whole time the tusk was protecting Flora just it was from her mother.

Final Thoughts:
Whoa - so much happens in this book and I wasn't ever bored. The writing made this book move along so seamlessly.

The characters were flawed and so completely messed up, but in a fascinating way that kept me dropping me mouths many times as I read this book.

I kept thinking if you have children you'll relate and if you don't have kids you'll be thankful you don't.

IG | Blog

Thanks to Netgalley and Mulholland Books for the advanced ebook. Thanks to Hachette Audio for the audiobook. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Dearest
Rating : ⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

"The last time she felt this alone, she was young enough to still have her imaginary friend, Zephie. It has been a long time since Flora even thought about her, but Zephie had kept Flora company from her toddler years into childhood."

-------------------------------------------

Dearest by Jacquie Walters was at first glance a story about a mom, Flora, struggling through the early days of her postpartem journey. As many moms experience similar issues, I found her character to be extremely relatable. As the story progresses, we begin to think something deeper may be afoot. Something darker. This story kept me guessing through each plot development.

Due to what turns out to be an unreliable narrator, we as an audience aren't sure what to believe. I truly could not figure out exactly where this story was headed or what to believe as we uncovered new information. While I did struggle with the writing style, specifically the point of view and the tense the book is written in, the plot and its continuous intrigue kept my attention. I will say the ending had my mind whirling.

⚠️Warning⚠️
Language, adult content, death, suicide (off-page)

Loved this title. I will be adding this author to my watchlist in the future. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher.

This story delves deep into the early days of motherhood, and the gruelling transition mothers experience adjusting to life with a newborn. Flora is exhausted and missing her husband who is deployed, so she reaches out to her mother. The help she receives from her mother is sinister. I enjoyed the psychological aspect of this story that had me guessing what might be real, what might be exhaustion, and what might be a trick of the mind.

Dearest by Jacquie Walters is every mother's nightmare.
It follows Flora, a new mother who's having to tackle parenting alone the first few weeks of Iris's life due to her husband being deployed. While Flora loves Iris with all he heart, she can't help be feel overwhelmed. She isn't sleeping.
She's getting forgetful. And she's starting to see and hear things that aren't there.

Feeling like she has no where else to turn, she contacts her estranged mother. A day later her mother knocks at the door offering her help. Everything starts out okay, but some weird things begin happening. Was the person she really let through the door her mother, or something more sinister?

This book was a breeze to read. While it deals with some heavy subjects, it's written so well that I just couldn't help but keep reading. I was addicted to the unreliable narrative and twisty plot. This book is a fantastic debut and I can't wait to see what the author puts out next!

Read this if you're looking for :
• Creepy bugs twisty books
• unreliable narrator
• hardships of parenting
•motherhood horrors

Special thanks to NetGalley for the ARC

Dearest by Jacquie Walters, Flora is a new mom and her husband is deployed but he will be home in just a couple of weeks but it seems like forever to poor Flora. When it comes to being a mom she thinks she’s doing everything wrong and even wishes her estranged mother Jody could be there to help. All Flora’s life she’s wanted a good relationship with Jody but for reasons she doesn’t understand that wasn’t the case. Even her sweet loving husband Connor doesn’t like her self-absorbed mother soon Flora there’s no time to think about her mom Jody because strange things are happening from a line of beetles that want nothing more than to climb in three week old irises mouth to finding strange things in the woods and even her childhood imaginary friend Zephie shows up. From being overwhelmed with having to feed little iris with her infected breast every three hours to everything else she is relieved when Jody knocks on the door but had Flora knew what was going to happen next she would’ve slammed it in her face and just did the best she could. There is so much I don’t want to give away about this book and trust me it’s a lot. it is one of the strangest books I have read as an adult and despite finding Flora to be almost pathologically annoying I still could not put the book down. I didn’t know where it was going and then when I did get there I was just flabbergasted because even when you think it’s over it’s not over and those are my favorite type of books. This is definitely what you would call a well done story.#NetGalley,#MulhollandBooks, #JacquieWalters, #Dearest,

This was a very fun read! Tons of twists and turns that I definitely didn't see coming. I wouldn't categorize it as "fast-paced" because it does take a while to figure out what's going on, but there is always something happening that really keeps you turning the pages. Walters is an exceptional writer and it truly shows as her characters seem to jump from the page. I will be eagerly awaiting the next release by this author!

I was so excited to read Jacquie’s upcoming release! There were so many layers and I loved peeling them all back! This dealt with some real life issues along with all the creepy vibes and some paranormal mixed it. It was such a different read from my norm but in all the best ways!

DEAREST releases tomorrow, 9/17, juuuuust in time for spooky season!

Thank you to Netgalley, the author and Mulholland Books for this ARC copy in exchange for my honest review ❤️

Thank you to NetGalley and MulhollandBooks for this advanced readers’ copy in exchange for an honest review.

Ok so this was a weird one, but I loved it!

The synopsis is one thing but my goodness this hits every type of horror you can think of: psychological, paranormal, realistic trauma, and a tad bit of squeamish horror (some of the imagery made me go 🤢). None of this deterred me at all though. Having the perfect mix of all these scares were blended just right.

The mother-daughter struggle was tireless but tender because there’s a lot of give and take and you never really know if they even like each other. Flora and her mother, Jodi, are the ultimate quarrel in this book with quite a few surprises along the way. I didn’t see a lot of them coming and overall added to how much I enjoyed this book. The quick succession of chapters and phrasing added to the intense nature of the book and the flow of the storytelling.

With that being said, the ending was a little bit too over the top for me. The imagery was WILD but it almost seemed just a smidge too overdone and took away from the rest of the realistic struggle because it was so wildly out there. Definitely not a bad ending by any means, but I honestly could’ve done without the epilogue I think.

I definitely enjoyed the writing style. It was told from a narrator’s point of view but the author cleverly inserts italicized phrases in the middle of narration that are of the main character’s thoughts. Very well done, and I feel like I connected with Flora on an even deeper level rather than it being told in the first person.

Overall, I ended up liking this book more than I expected and it’s opened my eyes to the horror genre a bit.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

(Check the trigger warnings for this book before you give it a go.)

I got Covid but I did read this book and I loved it! I will be doing a full review when I feel better! Thank you net galley for allowing me to review this book early in the exchange for an honest review! 4 stars

I LOVE THIS BOOK! It has everything I want in a horror novel: body horror, family trauma, unpredictable twists. There’s a claustrophobic madness in this story that really gets under your skin and stays. I have not had a baby and this made me… not want one even more (lol.) I could say so much more but I will not as it’s one you should (you must!) read and without any idea of where it’s going.

4.25 stars

I have always said that there is nothing more horrifying than being a mother, and this powerful debut proves that point. Incredibly difficult to read, it brought me back to those dark and lonely days of early motherhood, where everything hurts and oozes, you are sleep deprived, and overwhelmed with feelings of anxiety and dread of all the things that could potentially harm your baby. Touching on themes of postpartum depression, anxiety, and psychosis, you're never quite sure what is real and what is not.

Flora is a new mother, who is solo parenting for the first few weeks of her daughter's life while her husband is deployed overseas. She has difficulty breastfeeding, is running on no sleep, and is slipping in and out of consciousness where she can't remember what she has done. Being a mother herself now makes her reevaluate her relationship with her own mother, with whom she's been estranged from for years. She reaches out to her, and is shocked when she shows up on her doorstep, ready to help with the baby. From there, Flora only descends deeper into madness, and is convinced her mother actually means her and the baby harm. Her childhood imaginary friend Zephie also makes a return, further blurring the lines between reality and hallucinations, and starts to act as the devil on Flora's shoulder, telling her what she must do to save her baby. The main twist in this book completely took me by surprise, but the consequent reveals were more predictable, given what we discovered earlier. The full circle ending was scary and powerful, and shows what women are willing to put themselves through in order to be mothers.