this book really intrigued me but i couldn’t get into it, maybe the start was just too slow? i’m not sure but i love the idea

Well now I know what I’m into and not into. This was spicy and informative. I was interested in this book because I realize I know nothing about BDSM and how one finds themselves into certain kinks. This is not to shame anyone for what their kinks are. I love this for anyone who participates in this sort of thing. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to read an advanced copy. I would recommend this to anyone who is at least curious. I can say this has satisfied my own curiosity.

I thought this was a fascinating read and an interesting insight into the life of a sub. My only issue is that I did not like how it was written, there was something about the style of writing that felt disingenuous.

This is one of the hottest works of erotica I've read in a long time. It covers many aspects of kink and BDSM culture. A delight for fans of well-written erotica.

Am I normally a nonfiction girlie? No. Did this grab my attention? Absolutely.

A candid memoir that offers a thoughtful, unflinching exploration of submission, self-acceptance, and the complexities of desire, handled with remarkable sensitivity despite its intense subject matter. While I had a pretty good idea of what may lie in the pages, if you are not part of the community, please look through some reviews for any material that may shock or upset you. Sonnet skillfully provides insightful perspectives on ethical non-monogamy and sex-positive relationships and the innerworkings of BDSM through her personal experiences, but some sections contain potentially triggering content. Through intimate personal stories and honest reflections, 'Submit' presents a brave narrative that goes beyond simple titillation to examine deeper themes of the mind, body, and soul of a submissive in the BDSM community. What could have been merely sensational becomes a nuanced exploration of identity and desire.

This was a fascinating read/memoir and definitely a non-fiction highlight for me this year. As someone who has her own share of admitted kinks, it was really interesting to read someone else's POV and thoughts on the matter, alongside other tangents, scientific facts, statistics, and quotes from others who share in these same experiences, however unique. This book is broken up into three (3) parts - Mind, Body, and Soul - and I found Sonnet to be a really strong writer, with a distinct style to be found within each section. Furthermore, I like how there were very clear moments where Sonnet would deliberately choose to actually "show" versus just "tell" us things, and vice versa, which I really appreciated (as, to me, it proved to me that they had a firm grasp on what they wanted to say, explain, or show to us, as readers, and how to best execute it). Definitely recommend this one for those looking for a very enlightening and intriguing non-fiction read!

I found "Submit" by Sonnet to be an intriguing and provocative memoir. The book is divided into three sections—Mind, Body, and Soul—offering a raw and unfiltered look into the author's life as a submissive.
Sonnet's writing is vivid and electric, drawing readers into her world with unapologetic honesty. The "Mind" section particularly stood out, showcasing the author's talent for seamlessly transitioning between descriptive and reflective passages.
While I don't often read memoirs, I appreciated the change of pace this non-fiction work offered. Sonnet's unique perspective challenges conventional ideas about pleasure and control, providing thought-provoking insights into the psyche of a submissive.
However, some scenes in the "Soul" section are not only explicit but also crass, potentially requiring a trigger warning for sensitive readers. This aspect made me question whether more context or framing was necessary.
Despite these critiques, "Submit" offers a fascinating glimpse into one person's experiences and desires. It's an empowering narrative that demonstrates the author's control over her choices and story.
Overall, I give "Submit" 3.5 out of 5 stars for its compelling writing and unique subject matter.

Thanks to NetGalley and the Publisher for the early read.

This was a sexy and spicy read. If you're in for a wild ride, check out this book!

Wow. Just…wow. What an honest, vulnerable, intense look into the life of someone who has been more brave and powerful through their sex life than I will ever be!

This memoir contains scenes that had me blushing, mouth agape and knees crossed. I couldn’t even help or contain my reaction at times. Yet the author is so open with readers that I never once felt horrified or ashamed for her. Never did I stop reading to judge what she chose to do with her body or say to myself, “Well, I would NEVER do that!” Reading lived experience like this one feels so much more intimate and private than watching a film on the same subject. I feel quite honored that the author, known to us only as Sonnet, would share with us all her love of being a submissive and the sexual experiences she explored.

The memoir is written in three parts that brilliantly shape the experience for the reader. I loved the pacing and the setting up of each scene. Basically, the writing just makes sense and feels as if a friend is being open and honest about their latest sexual exploration. By the end of the book I was questioning my own sexual desires and what I might like to explore in the future. I’d love to see myself becoming even just a little more free of my repressed sex life. Sonnet has given me courage and curiosity.

I am definitely going to order multiple hard copies of this memoir to give to VERY close friends this holiday season. I’ll hand them out with a bottle of wine and say, “Here. Go, read, enjoy, and live a more authentic sex life.”

As always, a big thank you to NetGalley and to the publisher, Grand Central Publishing, for allowing me the privilege to enjoy the ARC of this decadent memoir.

Submit, by Sonnet, was published on September 17, 2024.

Are you just curious about BDSM or a BDSM baby?

I don’t subscribe to telling people what to read, but if you think Submit is your next go-to book on how to be a submissive or what to look for in a submissive, then you’re going to want to look for another book. This is not that.

However, if you’ve always been curious about how one, singular submissive’s mind works, along with some interesting anecdotes, facts, scientific studies, quotes, and statistics surrounding sexuality and other matters that you may not even think play a part in kink, then Submit might actually be a book that would interest you a great deal.

There are two caveats I have for you, though: Keep in mind this memoir is about one submissive’s experiences and therefore do not reflect the experiences or practices of other submissives, and please PLEASE be aware this book contains material that could be potentially triggering to those that may be more sensitive. Your mental health matters, always.

Submit is separated into three sections: Mind, Body, and Soul. I found I enjoyed the first section the most. Sonnet is overall a very talented writer. She has a very clever and seamless way of switching from her “show” sections of the text to the more “tell” sections and then back again. The same is applicable to switching topics. In my opinion this is best employed in the “Mind” section, though she comes back and does it almost as well in the “Soul” section. The “Body” section is easily the most uneven and awkwardly written section of the book, which makes sense to me given that Sonnet isn’t a doctor, scientist, or mental health professional.

I have many issues concerning the fact Sonnet doesn’t bother to distinguish between a submissive and a masochist, and the fact it seems she doesn’t take the matter of safewords as seriously as I would hope any BDSM practitioner would. I also have a tremendous issue with the fact there were no content warnings included in the book (it should be mentioned they may be included in the final copy and just were not included in my eARC). While I personally didn’t find them necessary, there are a great many people who may pick up this book and unwittingly be triggered by material inside. Content warnings can give potential readers time to gather themselves before plunging into a book that may trigger them. That’s an important issue in a book that boldly deals with BDSM topics.

I hope this book finds fans and shelves to belong on. It’s not a bad book. It’s just an uneven one that doesn’t quite meet up with what I would hope to read in a book that presumes to take BDSM and submission seriously.

I was provided a copy of this title by the publishers and author via Netgalley. All thoughts, opinions, views, and ideas expressed herein are mine and mine alone. Thank you.

File Under: Memoir/Nonfiction

⭐️4
Anonymous memoir about life as a submissive within the BDSM community. The anonymity aspect is golden. It provides Sonnet a safe outlet, the freedom to share the tea with US, and I am here for it!

This account is unique-unlike anything I’ve read before now. Sonnet is brutally honest. She describes her various relationships while opening the curtains to her mind and emotions.

If you are like me, you may have a few preconceived ideas about the BDSM way of life. Her stories were shocking, and at times, I could not put this one down.

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/6783017665

Pub date: September 17, 2024
Thank you NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.

This book is a remarkable testament to honesty, openness, and courage. The author’s willingness to candidly explore her experiences with sex and her personal kinks is both refreshing and commendable. Her bravery in sharing such intimate details is evident throughout, and her confident demeanor suggests a strong sense of self-assurance that contrasts with her earlier, more restrictive upbringing, as described in the book.

The narrative provides an insightful glimpse into the mind of a submissive, exploring the psychological and emotional aspects of her preferences. It delves into the origins of her interests and offers a nuanced understanding of why she finds fulfillment in her role. This book champions the idea that there is nothing inherently wrong with embracing one's sexual desires and understanding one's preferences. Overall, it serves as both an informative and empowering read for those interested in the complexities of sexual identity and exploration.

Feel extremely neutral - not something I was like obsessed with but an interesting read and something different from what I normally consume

Erotically charged and sex-positive!

Sonnet is the pseudonym of a businesswoman based in London and New York.

This book provided insight to a world I knew little to nothing about. One often cast in judgement and misunderstood by society. Sonnet recalls her earliest memories growing up in a religious family, and that even as a child she would fetishize the bible stories read to her. Consensual subservience, erotic pain, and punishment all became a part of her identity that she felt empowered by. The book is split into three sections, exploring her mental journey of unlocking the pleasure centers of her body, and bringing her deviant fantasies to life. The prose is graphic and extremely candid, leading the reader through different scenarios in Sonnet’s life including polyamorous exploits with various dominant partners, sex clubs, dungeons, and random public spaces where she explores her exhibitionist side. This memoir flowed seamlessly, it was intriguing, and I couldn’t put it down.

4/5⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
For readers who are curious about the BDSM world, and enjoy more of a shock factor.

this is incredibly well written and a lot of Sonnet's meditations on love, consent, and life in general were really well done. I feel like I learned a lot. However, many of the stories about Sonnet's experiences were quite overwhelming and I ended up having to skip a lot of them because they stressed me out. I know that everything was consensual and she really enjoyed it, but it was personally a lot to read about.

A fascinating memoir about being a part of the UK BDSM industry and the authors reasons for wanting to experience and live that lifestyle. An interesting read on such a taboo topic.

A memoir that manages incorporate education on the BDSM community, insight into the mindset needed and personal experience.

My thoughts were put best by Katie Naymon, this was "shameless in the most complimentary way".

{Thank you bunches to NetGalley, Sonnet and publisher for this eARC in exchange for my honest review!}

I have been a member of the BDSM community for ~15 years so I was thrilled to see a Big 5 publisher tackling this topic with such vulnerability and openness as through a memoir. There were parts of Sonnet's memoir that I resonated with. However I had strong distaste for her disdain at the separation between BDSM and sex. The separation is intentional - it creates a space for those who are asexual to still enjoy BDSM for one, but also makes BDSM spaces safer for women and marginalized groups. The lack of awareness for this critical separation discolored the rest of the memoir for me. [I similarly had issues with the race-centered story near the end of the book. Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance copy.

So, the premise of this book was immediately fascinating to me. I love the idea of someone writing under a pseudonym. I think it lends itself to a kind of immediate authenticity because fear of judgement and shame are removed (particularly given subject matter like this).

The world of kink is foreign to me and getting an insider sneak peek was illuminating. I loved all the discussion about consent, desire, and consensual non-monogamy. Sonnet seems very knowledgeable, and I reason that makes sense considering how long she has been involved in the kink community and the extensive research she's done.

However, where she began to lose me was the water sport retelling. I'm not going to yuck someone's yum, but that was a little off-putting. However, where things really escalated to ABSOLUTELY NOT and where I had a visceral reaction was the bestiality references. I'll leave it at that.

I will say I am shocked that such a graphic book is going to be released by a Big 5 publisher. I would have expected this to be indie or even self-published, which I guess speaks to my "vanilla sensibilities". So, good for you, Hachette for taking the risk with what could be such a controversial title.

What an empowering book. To begin with, the way she set the rules of her writing just shows how confident she is in her own body and in her life. No matter if you're into BDSM or not, this is a must read!