Story and Content: A-
Writing: A-
Narration: A
Best Aspect: An brave and honest memoir about growing up in a family when abuse occurs.
Worst Aspect: Very descriptive abuse can be hard to listen to, but it gets the point across.
Recommend: Yes.

I’m interested in personal stories and Ruth Clare’s memoir is exceptional. Add to that the fact that she also narrates ( really well) and the sun total is both powerful and profound. Make no mistake; this is not an easy listen. The abuse at times seems endless….but that was her life. It influenced the person she became and ultimately, it’s a testament to her personality and strength of will.

It raises many questions and for sufferers of any trauma, it may well ignite painful memories. I’m fortunate in having come from a living home and background, but i find insight into other lives fascinating and it often helps to understand how and why people are motivated to behave as they do. It’s a moving account, very well told with literally no holds barred. I will have to take a few lighter reads and listens after this as it is unsettling. I truly admire her bravery and honesty in writing this account and providing such a unique perspective.

I received a free Advanced Reading Copy via NetGalley in exchange for a complete and honest review.

One of the best books I've read in a long while.

I don’t really know where to start, because this memoir affected me more than I would have thought at the beginning.


In this book, Ruth Clare impressively illustrates what untreated trauma can do to a person - how it can change them. It shows how trauma can be passed down through generations, shape families and perhaps even destroy them in the end.
And it also shows how people may no longer be able to remember what they have done because everything is blocked out. How people lose control over themselves and their actions because they live in fight or flight mode. Because it’s just survival.
And this book shows us what trauma that is not dealt with and recognised does to the people around it. We accompany Ruth through her childhood, adolescence and, in some scenes, through her adulthood. We experience a cycle of love, violence, loss, despair, self-deprecation and much more.

The book makes me angry at the system and makes me think about my own history. Many things that I keep pushing away have come up and had to be addressed/discussed in the last few days.
Personally, the book has made me realise that I am far from finished coming to terms with my own past.

It is not an easy read, but anyone who is interested in understanding how war and trauma affect us should give „Enemy“ a chance.
For me personally, it is a very courageous work, as Ruth Clare has made herself very vulnerable.


Englisch audiobook:
Ruth Clare has read her own memoir and I am still deeply impressed. Her power of speech is incredible and so much emotion came across throughout the book that I can only praise her.
Clare read as if she was really telling someone a story. She played with her voice, perhaps letting her emotions and memories guide her. I would recommend this book as an audiobook to anyone, as Clare’s voice creates a very intimate experience.

It takes courage to tell our darkest secrets, and Clare has left no holds barred. Thank you so much for this incredible book, to Clare for reading her own story, and NetGalley for the ARC.

The beginning of this novel gives you a warning of what you will walk into. Ruth relates how even thou PTSD was not recognize till 1974, which is wild to me. That even if it would have been earlier, her parents wouldn’t talk about mental health at home. Living in this type of environment does take a toll on you and is exactly what the author describes throughout this audiobook. How if we don’t heal those parts of ourselves, we might be stuck in a cycle of violence. Also being able to seek help, to not go into maladaptive behaviors and wanting to be the best version of yourself for those who you love. I liked how the author was the narrator for the book, because you can tell how personal it was to her to do so. This can be used as a motivation story and a great case study for those in the mental health field.

I requested this book because I saw myself, my family, and my childhood reflected in Ruth's story. My dad is a veteran of the war in Iraq who came home with PTSD, which still goes unrecognized and untreated to this day. I love him deeply but we have a complicated relationship that only time has allowed to heal. Ruth's writing provided a type of inner healing that I didn't know I needed. I'm so glad I stumbled upon her book on Netgalley. Her storytelling and the audio narration were enthralling and I couldn't put this down. I'm thankful she so courageously shared this with the world.

This is an extremely hard memoir to review. It is advertised as a memoir of her father's PSTD from Vietnam but it really is a memoir about her child abuse. It was hard to read because of that, as I struggled listening to tale after tale of her father's relentless verbal and physical abuse toward her and her sister. I ended up putting it down about 40% into the book because I could not handle the child abuse. I wish I could have listened longer to hear her dive deeper into her father's story, as the other reviews seem to indicate this is where the memoir really shines. She has a shocking amount of empathy toward her parents - both her abuser and abuser's enabler - and I am impressed at her ability to feel this way.

The audio was great, again I think the content was a bit too heavy for me at this time to finish.

Thank you to Bolinda and NetGalley for an audio ARC for exchange for an honest review.