Well done for Anne Marie Tendler on crafting a very brave book! I applaud her vulnerability in writing so openly about her mental illness and recovery. There’s a passage where she mentions her introversion can be interpreted as bitchiness, and as a fellow introvert, I definitely identify with that!

Men Have Called Her Crazy by Anna Marie Tendler
Star Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice Rating: N/A.
Trope(s): N/A.

Men Have Called Her Crazy is Anna Tendler’s upcoming memoir (releasing August 13th) which details her experiences in in-patient psychiatric care following her divorce from John Mulaney. She discusses her experiences in the mental health world, as well as giving the reader glimpses into her past relationships (romantically, platonically, and familialy).

I have to be honest, this book was not what I’d expected. I imagined Tendler’s debut memoir would be filled with the gory details of her very public divorce, but she masterfully skirts around the controversy, and doesn’t even mention Mulaney once by name: a feat that I think earns her sincere credibility as a writer. However, while very truthful and candid, it at times felt self-indulgent and repetitive. It is clear that Tendler wants to contribute to the conversation about women’s mental health, and I applaud her vulnerability in sharing so much of her recovery work. I do think we could have lost about 50 pages and still walked away with virtually the same message. However, this book is saved by its relatability and wittiness. Every single woman in the world can relate to some aspect of Tendler’s aversion to men (oops, sorry). Tendler is charming and lucid in her storytelling. This has earned her 3 stars in my scale, and I imagined she will be beloved by many others!

Big thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for sending me the arc of my most anticipated read of the year.

In this book, Anna Marie Tendler does a deep dive into her own thoughts and feelings as she recounts her life in chapters alternating between her time in a psychiatric hospital and outpatient therapy and through her relationships with people in her life and how they have impacted her leading up to her hospitalization and those after and how she navigated them after her release.

You can tell that Anna has a deep knowledge of both art and psychology by the way she is able to stunningly write about her experiences. She relays a message I think that all women will be able to relate to in a way that is so beautifully honest and real.

A quote that sums the book up is "Men have judged me and men have called me crazy, trusting in their own neutrality. But when neutrality is only accepted by the one who has created it, it is an illusion." Anna's examination of this idea is one that I think will be deeply appreciated.

I love a good memoir and this did not disappoint! Anna Marie Tendler’s writing is captivating, honest, and had me hooked on her story from the first page. I was particularly moved in chapters about her egg freezing journey (as an IVF-er myself), and the loss of her beloved dog, Pentunia. I, admittedly and embarrassingly, only knew Anna as ‘someone’s ex wife’ before reading this, and I am so humbled and glad that I got the opportunity to take a peek into her life and experiences as.. you know.. a whole ass person! Loved it!

This was an engaging, meaningful read as the author recounts periods in her life as she got stronger and learned ways to work through her psychiatric issues. It shows a lot of insight and is very intelligent.

I absolutely loved this memoir. Anna Marie Tendler tells the story of her hospitalization and recovery while interspersing stories from her teens and twenties. I think a lot of people will go into this novel expecting the author to speak on one of her relationships; however, the story is entirely her own. Tendler details her past relationships with men in a very intimate and candid way. She put herself back in the shoes of who she was when she was in those relationships, which I appreciated. She was also very honest in the ways that she could have been better in those relationships. You could tell she was writing this story from a healed place. I think the pacing of the novel was good and it never seemed to drag. The novel handled some heavy subject materials well. I would add a trigger warning at the beginning of the novel, as it may be distressing for some readers. What I truly loved about the memoir is how you could tell it was authentic. Tendler did not sacrifice her opinions and values to make this a more "palpable" novel. I think women will primarily relate to this memoir, and I think Tendler prefers it that way. I admire her tenacity. I will be recommending this to my family and friends.

If you’re looking for John tea this is not it. If you’re looking for an honest depiction of a woman’s struggle with her body, her relationships with men, and her work to get better this is it. I loved the honestly and the voice and I thought it was an interesting and beautiful memoir.

Thank you, Netgalley and Simon & Schuster for this advanced reader's copy. This is a fantastic book about one woman's journey in 2021 in admitting herself to a psychiatric hospital following a year of crippling anxiety, depression and self-harm. I found it very interesting how she described her time in the hospital and her symptoms in the beginning of the book and yet it differed from how it was described (perceived?) as she reads from the patient notes written by her (male) doctor at the end of the book. The book also speaks to her experiences with men- unrequited love, losing her virginity, dating, and her decision to freeze her eggs while all her friends were having children. It is a very open and honest depiction of mental health and how she was (and women can be) perceived and judged differently due to inherent gender biases.

Beautiful, tender, raw memoir mostly about the two weeks in 2020 that Anna Marie Tendler spent in rehab for extreme self harm and suicidal ideation, as well as memories and stories of the men who have been most related to her trauma and psychosocial development. John Mulaney is not a character in this book at all - it's just about Anna and her experiences, her lessons learned, and her journey to be okay with herself. It's a well-written and affecting work that gave me a ton to think about and a whole new level of empathy for Anna's struggle (and the struggles of the many, many women like her).

I really enjoyed this beautiful complex story. I've been following Anna Marie for years now so I've been through some of the events mentioned in the book. It's really cool to get an insight into what was actually going on. I'm of course sad a certain someone isn't referenced but I understand why. I finished this book feeling incredible powerful and ready to start my own journey to happiness and freedom. An incredible read even if you're not familiar with Anna Marie.

I flew through this a few hours. This was brilliantly done. The way Tendler explains the complicated relationship women can have with men hit home for me. I felt like she took my personal feelings and experiences and put them in this book. The way she opens up about mental health was handled very well - honest, raw, and direct. I felt like she owns up to who she is, and doesn't cast herself as a victim in any situations. The feminine rage is real, honest, and justified. This is a very intimate memoir of what womanhood is.

I would like to note, I did not know who the author was before starting this, and looked her up at the midway point. If you're here for tea about her public relationship, you won't find it here.

Thank you to Simon & Schuster and NetGalley for the ARC.

When I first started this book I went in blind as to who the author is and the following of her. I am glad I didn’t know anything about her to skew my opinion that I formed in the first few chapters. Which I wanted to read because of the topic to make sure it wasn’t triggering for me, having had an eating disorder for a large portion of my life.
After the first few pages I was drawn in by this book because let’s be honest here most memoirs are basically stories written on post it notes published if we are lucky in order to keep us amused and interested in finishing, and this book is not that. I was really impressed with the writing and chapter set ups. The unfolding of her therapy into stories of her youth that seem to connect with her life damage.
While this book focuses on a short period of her life I felt like I got to know her so intimately and was really cheering her on to recovery and hoping that through her journey it would answer questions I hold about my own.

Raw, emotional and mature. This is not a jaded celebrity break up story. This is a very real, personal story of a woman finally finding herself through her mental illness journey. Anna Marie's story is intriguing, heartbreaking and healing all at once.

One of the interesting things about memoirs is what the author chooses to include or exclude. As expected, this book focuses a lot on the author’s participation in a psychiatric hospitalization program, as well as the author’s profound hatred of men as a group. What I found interesting was how much time she spent talking about her dog, Petunia. Pets are incredibly important and can be one of the most important relationships in a person’s life, so it is understandable that Petunia is mentioned. However, Petunia has a limited connection to the author’s mental health issues and no connection to the author’s prejudice against men, so the amount of discussion in the book was somewhat surprising.

The discussion of her hospitalization and experience with mental health treatment was quite interesting, especially as her long-term therapist turned out to be a major obstacle, and because how different her experience was with the hospital psychiatrist, Dr. Samuels, compared to the hospital psychologist, Dr. Philip. Dr. Samuels treated her more like a generic psychiatric patient, who was largely interchangeable with other patients with the same or similar diagnoses. Dr. Philips, in contrast, treated the author as an individual of value and worth and actively discussed the psychometric test results in detail and engaged in a dialogue with her about the results— which results lined up with her self-perception, what surprised her, and how certain results suggested very different personality aspects that might seem inconsistent together but actually made a lot sense to the author when she considered her life and character.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
I had decided I was done requesting ARCs for a while when I deactivated my bookstagram, but when I received an email to read “Men Have Called Her Crazy” months before it published…the choice was already made for me. And I adored this book.

Anna Marie Tendler’s memoir is told through a braided narrative: one that chronicles her relationships throughout life (primarily those with men), and one that is focused on a voluntary hospitalization she experienced in 2021. And one of the primary characters who ties these different stories together?

Her French bulldog, Petunia.

I think that many millennial women will find elements of Tendler’s writing relatable, as I myself did: believing that an older man’s interest in you means you’re mature and cool (it doesn’t), trying to reconcile your adult relationships to your parents with your childhood ones, and the ongoing challenge to trust how you view yourself in a world that can amplify those of the men around us.

I will leave the rest of the memoir for you to discover when it’s released on 8/13 (if it isn’t already obvious, I absolutely recommend this one). There are so few books that would be able to make me cry in public, but this is one of them.

(Huge thanks to @simonandschuster & @annamtendler for this ARC in exchange for a review, as well as the random man who ignored me crying in the seat next to him during a transatlantic flight!)

Reading this memoir made me realize that I have perhaps never had an understanding of who Anna is, removed from her very famous ex-husband.
While I think that many will go into this hoping for some sort of tell-all about the extremely public divorce, this is an entirely different experience. Though it is obvious the divorce played a part in the pain which ultimately led to Anna spending time at a psych unit (which is where this book begins) he is both present in the story, and yet brilliantly removed.
I found this to be a vulnerable insight into the life of an artist, who has undoubtedly earned her own spotlight. Messy, human, with an ending that brought tears to my eyes. I wish Anna nothing but the most gorgeous life.

𝘔𝘦𝘯 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘊𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘏𝘦𝘳 𝘊𝘳𝘢𝘻𝘺 is a beautifully written, deeply affecting memoir in which artist Anna Marie Tendler examines how patriarchal norms and values have harmfully shaped her relationships, sexual experiences, and self perceptions. She also recounts her recent attempts to reclaim her journey, voice her desires, and trust her instincts. The book begins with Tendler checking into a psychiatric facility at the beginning of 2021 in order to better diagnose and determine a stronger treatment plan for her anxiety and depression, for over the course of the previous year the stresses of the pandemic, a crumbling marriage, and graduate studies have triggered disordered eating, self harm, and suicidal ideation.

The narrative moves back and forth across several points in time in Tendler’s life: growing up as the youngest child of an unhappily married distant father and volatile mother in small town Connecticut; entering and enduring various toxic relationships with power imbalances in her teen years and early adulthood; searching for purpose and fulfillment in different creative jobs; seeking help for her mental health; and navigating single life in her mid to late 30s. Similarly, Tendler cycles through anger, sadness, disappointment, self-doubt, and emptiness in various interactions with family members, lovers, and health professionals. The stories and emotions she shares are messy, complex, raw, and incredibly poignant.

I did feel one element was missing in her memoir, and that was discussion of her marriage and how that may have followed the same unhealthy patterns as her other relationships. However, since her ex-husband is a popular comedian, I can recognize that there may be legal issues to consider. I can also respect and admire that—after years of being mentioned in his stand-up material and then having a highly publicized divorce—she may have wanted this significant piece of her life and career to be completely independent of him.

𝘔𝘦𝘯 𝘏𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘊𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘏𝘦𝘳 𝘊𝘳𝘢𝘻𝘺 is a powerful book that delves into love, sex, family, friendship, and self-actualization with a feminist lens. I appreciated its reminder that grief, loneliness, and anger are all important aspects of the human experience and that women do not have to swallow complicated emotions or opinions for the sake of others’ comfort and esteem. Thank you to Simon & Schuster for an advance reader copy in exchange for an honest review.

"pure resilience and a little magic"

Thanks to NetGalley for an e-arc in exchange of my honest review!

this is nothing short of stunning. I love everything about this from the set-up of one chapter being about her time in the psychiatric hospital to the next being about her experience with yet another man that has probably called her crazy, to her honest and vulnerable thoughts and opinions about her life thus far, to the talks about female rage, the pressure and expectations on women in today's society, and about the understanding that can only blossom between two women. I laughed, I highlighted so many lines with validation, I cried, absolutely amazing

Thank you to Netgalley and Simon & Schuster for the advanced copy of the book. I knew of Anna Marie Tendler but I didn’t know much about her other than her creation of art and her dog Petunia. Her memoir is raw, honest and self-reflective. Her writing is compelling and I felt as if my friend were recounting her deepest darkest secrets to me in a way that still offered humor.

There is no denying that Anna is a very talented and captivating writer. I read the book from start to finish in one sitting. Everyone who reads this book should go into it being aware that it deals with a lot of dark topics that can feel extremely exhausting and overwhelming to read. While this book is beautifully written and provides major insight into mental health, it does have a few shortcomings. (In my opinion) First, her writing style was very overwhelming to me, especially when she was in the psychiatric hospital. We are given a rundown of everything that happens during her stay, and by the end of it, I was left feeling very overwhelmed and disoriented by her writing. I do understand that this is more of a reading preference, and it’s more than likely that this does not bother other people, but I do feel like that section of the book could have been edited down a little.
Second, while she is in the psychiatric hospital, she writes of a few major breakthroughs about how there are many different experiences she has had with her parents, depression, and (of course) men that has deeply affected her mental health and how she perceives the world. But, once she gets out of the hospital, she adopts a “fuck all men” and “men are the cause to all of my problems” outlook on the world. And while I don’t in anyway want to discredit her hatred of men and the obvious ways in which men have negatively impacted her life, I will say that it is frustrating to read about all of the different ways in which her mental health and been affected and then to see her look past all of it and land on one thing.
Overall, this is a wonderful debut into the writing world and I wish Anna luck in all of her future projects. If she does end up writing anymore books, I will definitely read them.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon and Schuster for letting me read an ARC copy of this book!!
(I would also like to say that there is little to no mention of her ex-husband in this book. So if you are reading this for that reason, you will be incredibly disappointed)