Member Reviews
men have called her crazy was an excellent read. I listened along with my reading and liked the narrator. I really appreciated the author's insight into being hospitalized and all the ways the world is messed up and got her there.
Men Have Called Her Crazy by Anna Marie Tendler is a first person account of the author’s struggle with mental illness and a stint in a rehab facility. It also recounts her childhood and teen years, as well as her early career, all the while dealing with feelings of worthlessness and gendered life experiences.
She recounts in detail her many years of self-harm and therapy. She self-describes as a woman who does not trust men and believes they dismiss women as exhibiting “aberrant behavior.” According to her, even her female psychiatrist misunderstands and undermines her.
After reading this book, I realized that the author is a social media personality, but am happy that I read it without any prior knowledge of or judgment of the author.
Generally, I like her narrative style, finding it was somewhat simplistic, but it also felt honest. The chapters skipping between ‘now’ and ‘then’ were not always clear and linear, so for me this disrupted the flow of the narrative.
I do hope Ms. Tendler has satisfaction with setting her experience in writing and moving forward in her ongoing journey toward mental health and happiness.
Thank you to Simon & Schuster and NetGalley for the ARC. This is my honest review.
I usually love a good memoir, and I was excited to hear from Tendler, but overall this book fell flat. While some parts were interesting, the tone of the story came across vapid at times and lacked introspection. I did find some of the discussions about mental health interesting, but like I said the introspection wasn;t necessarily there.
3.5 stars
This was an insightful memoir that gave readers a glimpse of recovery from depression and suicidal ideation in a rehab hospital setting. There were parts of the story that were emotional and devastating, yet others where it was difficult to connect with Anna Marie Tendler. There was a lot of focus on her distrust of men which sometimes became exhausting. The details on her therapy journey were very interesting to read, and I was hopeful that she would start to make progress toward becoming happier with herself and her life choices. Overall, I liked it, though a lot of the book seemed focused on her short stint in rehab (~2 weeks) rather than the events leading up to it.
Great first hand account, reads like a novel. It was a relief to see her taking care of herself. Scary to see how a relationship with a therapist can take a bad turn.
Enjoyed most of it. Felt like it could have used a few more rounds of edits. I would have personally enjoyed this book more if it spanned across more years in terms of the memoir aspect.
If you’ve ever been wrong in your life this book is for you. Kind of like girl interrupted. I ate it up quickly!!
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for the ARC! This was an extremely sought after advance copy for me, as I am a longtime admirer of Anna, her art, her unique perception of life through an artist's lens, and the story she had to tell.
This story had so much to offer and was a raw, vulnerable look at the oftentimes dark realities of mental health, misogyny, and the ability to rediscover one's own identity time and time again over the course of one's life. I do feel that there were some low points in terms of general awareness of the author's own privilege, both from a financial and general identity standpoint. That being said, though it is extremely important to recognize that the author comes from a place of privilege in many aspects, it is also important to note that her pain is still her own and lives inside her to its fullest extent. I think room could have been made to note that many people who deal with suicidal ideation or other mental health hardships also do not have a stable financial backing or support system or platform to back them.
I really, truly resonated with the portions of this book that tapped into the authors relationships with other women and, most of all, her relationship with sweet Petunia. Though I knew Petunia had passed before reading this memoir, the way their bond so powerfully translated off the page was so impactful. Their love for one another was instantaneously felt. As a dog owner myself, my heart became full, and then broken, many many times over the course of Anna and Petunia's story together. I always felt most settled and content when the page I'd turned to brought me yet another portion of their whirlwind sisterhood, romance, bond, and life together.
Memoirs are always so difficult to review because it's someone's life story. I was intrigued by the summary of a woman checking into a psychiatric hospital & how men impacted her. I was not familiar with her prior to this book. The book was more her hatred towards men & how they took advantage of her & also her poor relationship with her mother. I didn't really see her take accountability for her own actions.
Don't read this book if you're seeking dirt on Tendler's split from comedian John Mulvaney. While there are oblique references to their marriage and divorce, he is never named. His absence is conspicuous. What Tendler does share is her decision to enter a psychiatric hospital for depression and self-harm in early 2021. The book flips between her treatment there and her history with men from adolescence up to her marriage to an unidentified person. Her relationships provide a history of poor treatment and poor self-worth. and Tendler draws a direct connection between misogyny and her poor mental health. Tendler is vulnerable and I found both timelines compelling (although I was waiting for Mulvaney). I appreciated her analysis of how living in a patriarchy has hurt her. At the same time, she comes across as clueless about her privilege. She paints herself as aimless and unsuccessful but also describes socializing in elite circles and having high-profile opportunities in fashion and entertainment. Nevertheless, it's a moving memoir about mental health and healing.
This story started incredibly strong. The alternating chapters between the present and the past leading up to her psychiatric stay were well done: I did feel like the time leading up to her stay after were rushed over and I think that’s because they didn’t want a book about her ex husband. He’s never mentioned by name which I love for her, but I do feel like chunks of time and context were therefore missing from the story. I found myself skimming once she left the hospital because of that feeling. The beginning felt so honest and vulnerable.
Honest, unflinching look at the author's battle with mental illness and feeling like she's not "enough", something that so many women struggle with. Well written, fascinating look at a creative, artistic woman who does some hard work on herself to come out the other side as a healthier human being.
It resonated with me, as someone who also has struggled with my place in the world as a creative woman. Plus, I loved reading about Petunia.
Thank you Netgalley and Simon & Schuster for this ARC.
Incredibly open and relatable. The author talks about her experiences in a way that feels vulnerable, and I think particularly fellow elder millennial women will find a lot relatable here.
Every woman has been or will be mostly likely called "crazy" as a form of attack by some man in their life. Too bad for them, being called "crazy" now doesnt have the same stigma the word had before. Being called crazy now mostly comes from the woman finally standing her ground and calling out the man. This book does just that. Anna Marie takes back all the titles, diagnostics and claims they have given her and made it clear she still is a person. Her path she has taken in her life shows why she has the fears she has. Great read and great story telling.
Because this is someone’s real life, I’m going to step cautiously here.
I didn’t connect well with anything about the author’s story, including the writing style. It all felt self-indulgent and not particularly insightful. Let’s leave it at that.
Reviewing memoirs is a different kind of task. On one hand, I appreciate the life and struggles of the author. I followed and understood her journey. But the writing was difficult to read, and the book left me feeling pained. It's not uplifting but an important read nonetheless. Do I recommend it? Yes. But not for everyone perhaps.
This is a hard one to review. I was initially looking forward to it because of my interest in Tendler’s art, and let’s face it - her divorce from John Mulaney. Anyone hoping for gossipy dish will be sorely disappointed. This is one woman’s mental health diary that draws obvious comparisons to Susanna Kaysen. It’s interesting and well written, I went through it very quickly. But, given the attention and column inches given to boyfriends before and after Mulaney, I have to wonder if his omission was her choice out of a mutual respect they’ve come to, or if she had some kind of NDA/mutual NDA keeping her mum.
I was really excited for this one and it was so much more than I hoped for. I really enjoyed the imagery Tendler walked us through and as someone who has struggled with mental health issues myself, it definitely hit harder than I had expected. She paints a very real picture of what it’s like to struggle with yourself as an adult after having dealt with it as a teenager. I wound up waiting and listening to the audiobook when it was released since it’s read by the author and she does a wonderful job of bringing her story to life. Honestly one of my favorite reads of the year.
Thank you to Ingrid at Simon & Schuster and to Netgalley for sending me this eARC.
This was not what I was expecting. It was a brave book that felt with some serious topics. But i feel like this book should have come a few years later when she has more time to reflect on this particular part of her life.
The end will have you in tears however so have some tissues nearby.
Thank you to NetGalley and Simon & Schuster for this advance copy of Men Have Called Her Crazy by Anna Marie Tendler! I love a sad girl book, and this memoir about Anna’s time spent in psychiatric treatment and everything that led to it was dreadful and entertaining. Anna hates men, so naturally the book was filled with stories about relationships with men in her life. I was disappointed that she didn’t mention her ex husband and very public divorce, which I could imagine might be the most impactful relationship with a man in her life. Plus the divorce is the reason I know who she is and picked up this book. It made me realize we’re only getting part of the story. Overall I enjoyed the book and could not put it down.