Cleavage: Men, Women and the Space Between Us is a new release from transgendered American author Jennifer Finney Boylan, Her first book, She's Not There, discussed her transition and its effects on her life, including her family, career, and friendships. The new book dives deeper into her life as an activist/writer and touches on her partnership with her wife; there's more here about her relationship with her son. I wish the book offered more information - medical and scientific- about why a person feels their gender identity is not the same as their birth gender. It's difficult for many people to understand the need to undertake this kind of major change, although we can respect it. Boylan makes the point that hope and love can overcome most challenges. I appreciated her honesty and the love she clearly has for others. Recommended for transgenered individuals and the people who work with them, live with them, and love them.

This was my first Jennifer Finney Boylan book, so I had not read her memoir She's Not There, which gets referenced often in this work. Overall I think this book certainly discusses a lot of topics regarding coming out as trans, and how Boylan navigated that within her own relationships. Her marriage to Deedie was so ridiculously sweet - what a true commitment these two have made to one another. What fell short for me were some of the chapters that were kind of bizarre and just seemed to be slipped in amongst the actual stories about Boylan's life.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read this book.

Cleavage was an interesting and enjoyable memoir. I have read her prior memoirs, and I was interested in what she would say in this one, especially reflecting on spending roughly half her life presenting as the boy/man whom she initially appeared to be and then half her life as the woman she knew she was as a young child but for which it took many years for her to openly acknowledge and embrace.

I appreciate that she has a lot of fond memories from when she presented as male. Not that it was easy “being a boy” when she knew she should be a girl, and not that her childhood was without difficulties (many of which were unrelated to her gender identity), but she respects and appreciates the life and experiences she had before, and she does not feel she is doing herself a disservice by acknowledging that. I know some members of the transgender community, if able to transition, prefer to pretend their old life didn’t exist, in part because acknowledging the “old” life provides an opportunity for attack and criticism from people unable and/or unwilling to accept that people who are transgender exist and are just as worthy as cisgender people.

The memoir has a lot of funny moments (the Tony the Tiger dream; the ventriloquist convention), as well poignant moments, and insightful moments. I particularly liked Boylan’s discussion of the transgender “scene” and resources when she was trying to figure out herself and transition compared to now, and how gender identity and expression has changed but in many ways is still the same.

Thank you Celadon Books for the copy of Cleavage by Jennifer Finney Boylan. What a book! I was captured by the writing style right away, and loved the humor and honesty. I loved how she wove in lines from songs as little Easter eggs that would resonate with readers of a certain age. There were fascinating tidbits about gender. Like a sudden obsession with weight, or when she went to voice lessons and realized it wasn’t just about the pitch of the voice, affect and words matter too. The insights she has about trying to navigate the world as a woman were eye-opening, and I loved her candor. I loved how the vignettes were like jigsaw puzzle pieces that fit together to form complete, cohesive stories and the stories all fit together to form intriguing commentary about gender, being human, and love. It was a brilliant way to structure a book I’ll be thinking about for a long time.

I enjoyed this book by Jenny Boylan. Jenny wrote this book as a trans woman who was formerly known as Jim. She shares her experiences of transitioning, along with the emotions and feelings that accompany such a journey. Through stories of her life before and after the transition, she provides insight into her life. I recommend this book to all readers who wish to understand the process of transitioning from one gender to another.

I remember reading "She's Not There" when it came out in 2003. It was probably one of the first times I learned about the transgender community. It was incredibly educational and eye-opening, and it gave me a great deal of appreciation for how brave Jennifer Finney Boylan is. In this new book, she again proves what an insightful and moving writer she is. "Cleavage" is a collection of essays that examine Boylan's life experiences and the many lessons she's learned over the years. I was surprised that there was so much I related to in this book, but Boylan makes tons of fascinating observations about what it means to be a female in this world (and those perceptions are pretty universal). I could have read many more chapters of this, and I look forward to snatching up the next book Boylan puts out.

I'm stunned by the honesty, intellectualism, and grace with which Jenny Boylan writes. She weaves together anecdotes with quotes, historical facts, and humor, to illuminate concepts related to being trans in America (or knowing someone who is). The prose was beautiful without being TOO unreachable - although it certainly takes some dedicated focus to let the words sink in. The chapters are not chronological, but they are tied together by themes, which made the book flow nicely without a feeling of chaos. My only regret is that this is my first read by the author. I think it would be an even better experience after reading her previous memoirs, since the stories build upon each other. Reading this one first means that you are playing "catch up" to understand the past events and contexts of Jenny's family/life. However, it was still a 5-star read for me.

This was great! I enjoyed Boylan's memoir about the third act of her life, as some people call it. I love how she has cultivated and maintained a huge community of friends and colleagues throughout her life. That's the dream!

I was super happy to receive a NetGalley copy of this, even though I didn't know it was a memoir until I started reading it - I just saw the author and loved She's Not There and Stuck in the Middle with You, so was ready to read a new release as long as it wasn't about anything spooky (hence I could not read the haunted memoir she did). (This one does mention ghosts but only very briefly.)

Thank you NetGalley, the publisher and the author for this ARC! A great read exploring gender. Worth the read!

This book was a super interesting read! The history and information provided was all very interesting and insightful!

According to the book information a transgender woman (once a man) will examine the differences between men and women in present day America and how life has changed since she came out in 2000. However, what this really is is a follow-up to Boylan’s first memoir, SHE’S NOT THERE that came out in 2005; there’s much about the author here and less about arm’s length comparisons of then and now.

First off, don’t let what you read in this review mislead you. Boylan is a hero by any estimation. Coming out publicly as transgender in 2000 was an incredibly, incredibly brave thing to do. Many people were still terrified to be publicly gay then, much less transgender. And Boylan was out and willing to publicly speak on the issue. So, thank God for her and people like her.

However, I get a sense that perhaps Boylan is feeling a bit left behind these days, maybe too much of an elder statesman, and not enough attention paid? She was a cast member on Caitlyn Jenner’s reality show, which I believe I saw once, and I don’t recall her. Bi get the impression she was there to try to guide Caitlyn, to help her make a positive impact as the nation’s best known transgender person (I don’t think that worked since I believe she’s a Trump supporter.). She doesn’t mention having done much advocacy work since, but I may not be remembering correctly, or she may feel like she’s done enough, dammit (I know that feeling. After years of serving in what felt like every board and committee in our city and President of this and that, I feel like I’ve done my time. Let the younger people with more energy take over now!)

The book and I did NOT get off to a wonderful start since for about the first forty pages Boylan talks about her obsession with weight. Well. I guess she IS a woman now (insert eye roll here). She gives lip service to how it’s “something she wants to fight” after she tells you how badly she feels about herself for going from a size twelve to a size fourteen (which I believe is the average size for women in America…and most women are not six feet tall, like she is.)

As mentioned this is her second, maybe third, memoir, so at this point she is just giving bits and pieces of her life. Regarding her sons: “Having a father who became a woman has helped make me children into better men.” I would think that is likely true as to being more accepting, and it’s likely also accurate to say the boys were better parented when their father became herself.

One very interesting thing about Boylan is that her marriage survived her transition. I would assume the statistics for that are fairly low. Then, in her 50s (I believe Boylan transitioned at around age 40, but I could be wrong) she and her wife get a very big surprise. No spoilers here, but it definitely makes Boylan look at things differently and the reader may too.

The book was interesting. I have to admit, I had no
idea who Boylan was before reading the book (which would surprise Boylan, I think. I think she thinks she’s very well know. She’s kind of a big fan of herself. She seemed to get a little huffy when people said her wife was actually the big hero in their story.). As I said, she is to be lauded for what she did, but it appears she was lucky enough to have the money to pay for the transition and all related surgeries herself, which is nice. I enjoyed reading about her life. 3.5 stars.

Jennifer Finney Boylan writes from her heart with empathy and humour. Her thoughts and feelings about transformation, both in gender and soul, are deep and passionate. With her latest book she includes stories she has shared before, as well as new issues put before us as this issue has become a political hotbutton.

Also in this book is her transformation as a parent, as her son becomes her daughter, and musings on parenting a trans son or daughter. She seems mostly to be preaching to the choir. She makes attempts to discuss the historical and literal inclusion of trans people for centuries, mainly to court the interest of those uninterested or opposed to transitioning, and parents who have negative reactions to their child coming out as trans. But that's a whole other book (which, hopefully, she will write).

Returning to the topic of what it means to identify as female or male, and the myriad ways people approach this, is articulate and probing.

Thanks to NetGalley for the eARC.