Defy is written very clinically. It has great work to back up its ideas which is great!
But it's not written in a way that people can understand and use in their everyday lives.

I'm not sure I knew what to think of this book, but I was hooked from the beginning and all the way through. Having this book that doesn't simply tell people to "get loud" but instead gives real like feedback on how to practice defiance was refreshing, as was the efforts to demonstrate this began from a place of compliance. I've already recommended it to several people.

This book was really fascinating. I loved that it presented that these well known great acts of defiance were not just a momentary moment of freedom, but instead built off of much smaller things. To defy means to start somewhere and be you true self. I think many will find this book inspiring to them.

Opening with a murder that lead the headlines, divided a nation, sparked social commentary for months about entitlement, borne of authority or positions of power, Dr Sunita Sah's Defy teaches us that it is easier to be defiant, to challenge authority, to stand up to wrongs, and to be a voice that changes the system from behind the safety our devices. When the wrongs are directly in front of us, the choice becomes much less easy, our voices often silent.

Defy shows us that we are faced with challenges almost daily, by way of subtle and often flagrant racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, and every other types of ism, not to mention in the world of political and religious fervor. We are shown how, from the time we utter our first word, we are skillfully taught the insidious art of subjugation; to not asked questions, to not speak too loudly in favor of that which isn't what everyone else is saying, to stifle our own beliefs because oftentimes having a strong voice comes with punitive action. In short, we've become afraid to speak up against anything that might affect our job, our home, our, family, our freedom.

Through academic research and personal stories, Defy is a powerful exploration of the spaces between capitulation and opposition, compliance and defiance, denial and integrity, in order to teach us how to get to one of the most powerful words in our vocabulary, NO. Dr Sah gives us the knowledge and tools to go from fear and guilt ridden silence to taking a stand against what we know to truly not be in the best interest of ourselves, our families, our communities, and our country.

Defy is a powerful work of psychology, social justice, and self-awareness. There isn't anyone who couldn't benefit from the wisdom contained in this book.

I was excited to read this book and was hopeful that I would change my tendencies of compliance and "being good" after reading Defy. I found the book a slow read with personal stories and fascinating real life examples of people having the courage to defy. I wish it gave clearer examples of using the defying principles in the readers' every day life.

Thanks to NetGalley, the author and publisher for an advanced reading copy of this novel and exchange for my honest review.

That anxiety in the pit of your stomach when you’re not comfortable with a situation — that’s often the first sign of a misalignment that may, eventually, lead to to an act of defiance, or lasting regret. In her research and this book, Dr Sah explores what makes us take a stand, or knuckle under to a situation that doesn’t seem right to us.

When do we defy? When, and why, do we comply? How do we differentiate between compliance and consent? The book digs into all of these questions, while offering both inspiration and compassion.

Aside from the fascinating discussion of the degrees of defiance, the big take-away for me was this: standing up for what we believe in is a skill that we must cultivate. Defiance isn’t a trait—at its best, it’s a considered action. This book makes a great guide.

A beautiful testament to defiance. As an autistic girlie whose default mode is defiance, and deeply experiences PDA (passive demand avoidance), I found this to be an incredibly insightful look at the values behind WHY someone chooses to defy. I know this book might not have been written thru the lens of neurodivergence, but I found it immensely helpful. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advance copy.

I have mixed feelings about this book. The premise of the book is intriguing. I liked some of the ways the author suggests that readers can work through the situations where they feel they need to speak up. Several of the examples were hard to read and left me feeling unsettled about the book. The concept of defiance is something we all have to deal with. The section talking about Defiance as a process resonated with me and I felt that I have experienced that in my life. Overall, this is a great book but for the right reader.

Thank you to Sunita Sah, NetGalley and One World for the advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Publication Date: January 14, 2025

Thank you to @RandomHouse and #NetGalley for the DRC of #Defy. The opinions expressed here are entirely my own.

I found this book very interesting and it feels timely in the current political climate in the US and beyond. Dr. Sah writes about defiance in a very personal, relatable way, illustrating how social and psychological norms can prevent us from following our true values and moral compass.

Sah doesn't rely solely on research to make her point. The book is layered with examples of real life defiance - from Rosa Parks to Greta Thunberg and the Challenger engineers.

Overall, a good read that will make you think.

Dr. Sunita Sah explores defiance and what it means to deliver a "True No." Sah delves into the research about defying and evaluates perceptions of defiance through real-life stories that will change how we view defiance and help us leverage it to cultivate change, big and small.

Dr. Sunita Seh's powerful DEFY could not arrive at a better time. Wise and reflection, this excellent book examined all the ways we can adopt "small-scale defiance" in thinking for ourselves and acting on what we know to be true rather than thinking and feeling one way and going along with what everyone else is doing or authorities proclaim is what we must do. The voice, the stories from others as well as Seh's own life experiences make this book feel like you're learning by listening to a kind and intelligent friend. I received a copy of this book and these opinions are my own, unbiased thoughts.

This was an excellent look at what it means to say no instead of yes, all the time, And how it can be viewed as defying people. When in reality that is not the case. I found the information in the book to be very helpful.

Wow. What an urgent, needed message, and a book unlike any I've read before. I'll be thinking about this one as the year ends and as I start 2025—thank you for the message!

A short book that explores what it takes to make decisions based on your values, and what holds people back. A few examples are more well known (Rosa Parks, the old experiment where people give electric shocks), George Floyd, but others are not. This would be a great book for a young person to understand how conscious decisions are made and how to be ready to make them in the moment.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC. #sponsored

It always takes me a little longer to read a nonfiction book as I tend to stop and think and jot down notes. Defy by Dr. Sunita Sah was such a book for me. It has so much to dive into. A book on defiance (it’s really way more than that!) could be dry and unappealing, but Dr. Sah writes in an approachable manner. This is a powerhouse of a read, well structured and thought provoking. There is a lot to unpack but the reader never feels overwhelmed. I found it practical, filled with action steps and questions to ask ourselves as we learn to say “no” instead of “yes.” Thanks to NetGalley, the publisher, and author, for an advanced copy. All opinions are my own.

I’m here for ways to speak up and push back, defying what seems hard to push back against. As a woman of color I understand the plight described by Dr Sah. However as much as I know I should say no, I often still find myself saying yes. This book gave me a boost of confidence in myself to believe in myself and not what I think others think.

A thought-provoking and beautifully written book outlining how we are raised to acquiesce and go along with societal norms and practices in our cultural, political, and personal lives. Asserting opposing ideas are discouraged and sometimes carry costly repercussions. Dr. Sah brilliantly takes us through real-world examples of how defiance is tamped down and overridden in subtle ways. She expertly details how we can change our conditioning so we can align our decision making with our value system. I found it very enjoyable, insightful, and timely in our current divided and fraught moment in our country - highly recommended!

Defy by Dr. Sunita Sah is easily the best book I’ve ever read on this topic. I never knew there was so much to know on defiance, but I found myself picking my jaw up off the floor in each and every chapter. This book is filled with case studies of well known people who have been made famous (or infamous) due to their defiance.

Defy opens with a deep look into the deeply rooted idea that says good person = compliant, bad person = defiant. Dr. Sah then looks closely at several studies to demonstrate how strongly most people cling to this idea. This book is broken up into three sections: the true yes, the true no, and becoming a moral maverick. The true yes section is a deeper look into what true consent looks like and the five necessary qualities of a true yes. The True No section is on the opposite side of the spectrum as the true yes, but all prerequisite qualities necessary for a true yes are also required for a true no. This section of the book really digs into what it means to be defiant. The final section on becoming a moral maverick dives into how a person might practice their ability to defy so that if a situation occurs that requires you give your true no, you can do so.

This book was so approachable and SO good. I enjoyed the writing and the many stories and case studies about real people who knew the time for defiance was now. I highly recommend this book!!

I would like to thank Random House Publishing Group and NetGalley for the eARC in exchange for my honest review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

A facsinating examination of how we understand our priorities/values and how we can be our best selkves in a challenging world. I appreciated the questions and examples that Dr Sah offers - very relevant and very helpful.

My thanks to NetGalley and Random House Publishing Group - Random House for an advance copy of this book that examines the obedience that seems to built into all of us, how it is in many ways making life worse, and how by being true to ourselves and saying no, that's wrong we might make our lives better, one defiance at a time.

America is a very illusionary place, one that is comfortable with its falsehoods. America pretends to be a place where mavericks and cowboys, rebels and iconoclasts are celebrated, where freedom is something that is ingrained in us all. And yet. After the American Revolution, many people wanted to make George Washington a King, or even better a tyrant. Many people in the last election stated proudly that maybe a dictator for America would be a good idea. Well that is one way I guess to get cheaper gas for trucks that get 9 miles to the gallon. This country lives by a motto, one that many would say is communistic, but is true. The nail that sticks out must be hammered into place. A man wearing woman's clothes. Stop. Two people of the same sex getting married, no no. Body autonomy for woman. NO, NO NO. Compliance is the Constitution, and those in power will never willing give up control. Eveytime we allow something, something more is taken away. Why though? Is it the fear in sticking out? The fear of being thought of as wrong, when really it is just a matter of opinion. We face these decisions everyday. At work, when a sexist comment is made, shopping; when a customer is wrong and takes it out on someone else; and in politics when we allow leaders to act blatantly corrupt. We as a people are told to say no is wrong. From childhood throughout life. This lack of saying no is why things might be so wrong. This book hopes that the power of no, might gives us back our power to be right. Defy: The Power of No in a World That Demands Yes by Dr. Sunita Sah is a call to change, to take that fear of being thought of as defiant, or annoying and using it to grow, not to stay stagnant, or even worse regress in many ways. And maybe make a better world for ourselves.

The book begins with two a murder in public. A police officer places a chokehold on a man accused of using a counterfeit bill. Two police men stand by and watch, even checking the choking man's pulse, but do nothing. EMT's say words, but also do nothing, while the man is publicly executed. Why was there no questions, no hey I think we can handle this now. Because of authority, the hierarchy, and how we are trained to listen to those in power. The author goes to a hospital for chest pains and is told that as a patient tha author can not leave until there is a CT scan. The author being a doctor also wonders why, and does not want more radiation for a test that might not be important. However the author does not think to question the other Doctor, for the Dr. Sunita Sah has always been told not to be defiant. From there Sah begins to look at ways that we are told not to question, again starting at an early age and moving through school, religion, jobs and even marriages. Not questioning not saying "NO, is not only detrimental but can be demoralizing. Sah offers examples of this, and offers Sah's own ideas a "True No" approach that can help people deal with problems in life, problems that cause us to morally and ethically be untrue to ourselves.

A very important book in these days of declining rights, and one that I am sure will start many conversations over the coming years. We as a society are so used to listening to others, leading to wars, environmental destruction, roads we don't need, a police that has tanks to enforce laws that lead to people being killed. No is a powerful force. Though we are so used to hearing it used against our rights. No don't think that. No, be normal for a change. Sah uses personal stories, research and studies to prove the points raised in the book. Sah is a very good writer, and there is a passion in this book that is missing in many books about self- improvement. Maybe because the stakes are so high.

An important book that raises a lot of questions, many which I am still thinking about. And a book a highly recommend.