I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley and am voluntarily posting a review. All opinions are my own.
How to Get a Life in Ten Dates has a fun premise, and one I resonated with. Dating as a woman or femme person is already hard with all the incels and redpill dudes out there (see: “your body, my choice” that became their slogan post-2024 election), but dating comes with its own set of challenges when you’re a fat person. While I’ve removed myself from the dating pool long ago, I loved seeing a story of someone who had a similar body type to mine going through the pitfalls of the modern dating scene.
Haleigh is definitely a complex, not always likable character, and she deals with some inner negative thoughts, both toward herself and others. And it’s just great to see someone who doesn’t have her life completely “together,” whose life is sometimes even a complete mess.
Jack is pretty great, and I liked his tension with Haleigh due to an encounter in their past. However, he also simply tries to be supportive of what she wants throughout, particularly where her dating troubles are concerned. The romance that built up while she was meant to be searching for someone else was subtle, but sweet.
The mental health rep is also great, and I appreciate that Howe showed nuanced depictions of two friends (turned lovers) with anxiety disorders, on top of Jack having OCD.
The “dating” aspect is fun, although I had mixed feelings about its impact on pacing. While she was breezing through random people, with each possible connection ending badly, I found myself cringing, but as soon as she found someone vaguely promising, the story switched gears and became more engaging. This did turn the dynamic into a love triangle for a while, but I had no doubt that things would work out.
On a final note, while Howe’s books are all standalones, I like the references to her past works, particularly to On the Plus Side. I DNFed the ARC for that one early on in the SMP boycott, likely for similar pacing issues that plagued this book, although I had initially planned on simply withholding the review if I did finish it. I am now intrigued to go back and give it a second chance.
As for this particular book, it’s a bit of a slow-burn, but it’s ultimately worth it. I recommend it to readers who enjoy romances with compassionate mental health and fat rep.

I did not enjoy the bisexual aspect of this book. This is a personal preference, but I prefer reading heterosexual romance.

Not your typical holiday romance or FMC. Haleigh is plus sized & bi. This has the trope of friends that hook-up, mess up the relationship, find their way back to friends, one still pines but decides to move on which makes the other jealous & decide to do something about it. This was an okay book to get you into the holiday mood.

Thanks to the publisher & NetGalley for advanced copy, and I give my review freely

I loved so many aspects of this book. The prose is funny and easy to read. Our heroine is wry and is great about finding the humor in any ridiculous situation. I loved all the represetntaiton this book included. Haleigh is attracted to multiple genders and all her loved ones set her up with people of multiple genders without question or criticism. I loved how her sexuality was completely normalized. I also loved reading about a main characters who have mental health struggles and plus-sized bodies. The lack of flat stomachs and washboard abs was extremely refreshing. I really fell for Haleigh while reading this book. I wanted the world for her and I was disappointed that the book didn't fully explore her getting that. This book does involve a bit of a love triangle because the premise involves her dating multiple people. My problem was that the book does a great job showing how the LI doesn’t show up for Haleigh emotionally or why they don’t work together but never shows us how that will change so that they can work together. There's one conversation at the 95% mark of them attempting to work something out and the next chapter is the epilogue where they are happily riding off into the sunset together. I don't want to be too harsh on this book because I actually really loved it. I just feel jipped of that final piece of development that we could have gotten than would really make me believe in their relationship. Instead it seems like she's settling a little which is totally not the feeling you want at the end of a romance.

A fun romcom read with great characters, the extra depth with plots and characterization that I love in a romance, and a welcome blend of humor, self-growth, and romance.

Thank you SMP and Spotify audio for review copies, ebook and audio. I loved the audio narration that made Howe's charming romcom come to life! I read and listened to this book, both formats are great (though I have a soft spot for romance books on audio!). I loved the inclusive themes in the book, that there was body inclusivity, examination of mental health, and dates that didn't focus on labeling sexuality as much as they were about finding a match. There was a lot of well developed details for the characters and plot that worked well without making a light hearted read "heavy"; Howe has a deft touch when it comes to balancing interesting, relatable, and well crafted characters with a plot that is engaging, charming, and fun.

I love the premise of the book. The whole blind date type of setup is entertaining and Haleigh definitely goes on some… interesting dates. I too was wondering where her friends and family found some of the people they were setting her up with. I think the date she went on happened too fast. I would’ve liked to read a little more about some of them and for there to be a longer pause between the dates she went on. The one date after another was a little jarring and it needed a little bit of a break between them to add more to the story.

Haliegh is ready to get her friends and family off her back about her single life, so she agrees to allow them to set her up on two dates. If these dates don't work out, she wins herself a 6-month reprieve from their nagging.

This novel was super fun and the dates were funny. I really liked the love interests and enjoyed spending time with them. I appreciated the way Haliegh and Jack's mental health was folded into the narrative. At one point there was a love triangle happening and I was pulling for both options. In fact, I would have enjoyed spending more time with the one she chose in the end because I wasn't completely sold on him being the choice. Also, when it was time to make the choice, the actions of the loser (for lack of a better word choice) were extremely out of character and abrupt. I wish that the changes were made more gradually. Overall, I was happy with this novel. I had fun, I don't really want more from this world, but I enjoyed what I got when I was there.

I loved the idea of this book more than the execution. Following Haleigh around as her family sets her up on 10 dates was fun, but the main character felt so flat. I was excited for a contemporary plus sized MC, because I always want to feel represented, but Haleigh didn’t bring much else to the table.

I had such high hopes for Jack, but some of his reasonings for doing things had me reacting like “oh- that’s not… don’t do that” and it felt like Haleigh was just settling because she was tired of dating EVEN THOUGH she just started a new relationship with a nice guy.

Overall, the first half of the story was super fun- I laughed out loud at some of the dates- and I loved the bi representation, but the overall story was just meh to me.

Haleigh lives the life that everyone who has ever been on a dating app lives. She deals with horrific comments and uncomfortable drinks and the occasional nasty date, until she decides to take it into her own hands. Or rather, she puts it in the hands of her family and friends. Haleigh gives her tribe ten dates to get it right - they can each set her up on two dates - with the goal is to find someone to bring to her sister’s party a few months out. As a reader, we live the dates alongside Haleigh as Howe paints a startlingly (unfortunately so) accurate picture of what it’s like to be single in a major city.

Special thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a free, electronic ARC of this novel received in exchange for an honest review.

Hayleigh’s been secretly pining over her best friend Jack since college, and trying to get over him since they got drunk and hooked up over spring break. After months of not talking, they precariously rekindled their friendship, creating a set of guidelines to keep to a strict friends-only status. Perpetually single, tired of bad dates, and sick of being harassed by her well-meaning family to settle down, Hayleigh proposes that each of her well-meaning family and friends can set her up on two dates, provided the prospective beau completes a questionaire. The winner will get to accompany Hayleigh to her sister’s upcoming weekend-long engagement party. And, if none of them are winners, she can go on an indefinite dating hiatus.

Hayleigh’s career angst is very real. A freelance editor and dog walker, she gets to live her life on her terms, but doesn’t make enough money to live alone, and is facing a self-eviction to give her sweet roomate and his long time boyfriend some privacy when they move in together. And, she’s looked down on for not having a stable career. The relationship angst is also very real. The dating disasters are funny in a schadenfreude kind of way, until she meets Brian, a goofy, kind vet who seems to check all her boxes. He’s a good kisser and they’re compatible, but he isn’t Jack, so Hayleigh keeps him at arm’s length. Howe writes real characters with emotion, and manages to avoid cyncism and look at the world with a healthy dose of humor. It doesn’t make anxiety, fatphobia, or OCD go away, but it does make mental health and body positivity easier to maintain.

The narrative is interspersed with Hayleigh and Jack’s rules for their platonic relationship (no kissing, no chapter headings), some of which also serve as headings for each of five sections, and acting as milestones to map the story–especially as Jack starts breaking them. Refreshingly, Hayleigh dates both men and women, and the queer representation is excellent. Each date’s completed questionnaire is presented, and is a fun way to introduce new characters. I didn’t understand from a pacing and structure perspective why halfway through the book, three profiles were jammed together and the dates glossed over; I wanted all the nitty-gritty details, even though the ending was obvious by that point.

Speaking of the ending… Hayleigh is way more forgiving than I would have been–so is Brian. It seems unfair that someone supposedly in her corner couldn’t be bothered to make a move until someone else found her desirable and he risked losing her. There is a risk of unforgiveable social faux pax with getting engaged at someone else’s engagement party, and I say that as someone who snuck off and subtley used my sister-in-law’s wedding photographer to snap a staged engagement photo (we were already dressed up, had the ukulele on hand, and paid for copies of the professional photos). Jack and Hayleigh’s revised rules for being engaged add charm to an awkward conclusion.

I received a free advance reader’s review copy of #HowToGetALifeInTenDates via #NetGalley courtesy of #StMartinsPress. This review will post to HLBB on 12/9/2024.

This book has a unique twist on the typical romance book. The two main characters have been best friends for lots of years. They know each other better than they know themselves. They crossed the friend zone boundary one time and that caused their whole relationship to blow up for months so they made up rules to follow so that never happened again. Haleigh becomes tired of being harassed about her dating life so she rallies some friends and family to send her on a total of ten blind dates to find someone she could see herself being with. Some of the dates are hilariously disastrous while others are the picture of perfection.

This was a very cute book surrounding the hardships that come with dating. It also deals with some mental health issues that make a person feel like they’re not worthy. I had a good time with this. It’s an easy read that wraps up everything nicely.

4.25⭐️s. Yup, this was a solid one. The last few chapters made me want to look at my husband and ask why he hasn’t bought me a bunch of bookshelves as a romantic gesture. 😂 Cause let’s face it, what girl doesn’t want a personal library as a gift. Truly was rooting for both Brian and Jack until then too.

Haleigh is a curvy 25 year old just trying to play the game called dating. She’s even got her best friend, Jack, helping find dates for her. Too bad he can’t choose them either. Or better yet, too bad their list prevents them from exploring more than just friendship. You got it. Haleigh has been in love with Jack for a while. That’s why she needs to move on. Enter Brian. After so many bad dates, Haleigh finally has a contender. But will Jack get jealous when Haleigh comes to him with raving reviews on the Brian guy. Find out December 10th!! You won’t want to miss this one.

Thank you to @netgalley @jennylhowe and @stmartinspress for the advanced reader copy. #howtogetalifeintendates #netgalley #jennylhowe #arc #advancedreaderscopy #romance

Jenny L Howe’s How to Get a Life in Ten Dates was so much fun to read. All Haleigh had to do to get her loved ones off her back about dating was to survive ten dates, two picks each from the five people she loved the most. I loved the little quiz she had sent out to each of her dates as a get to know you type thing. Some of the dates had me dying. I really loved the fact that this book dealt a lot with mental health as Haleigh dealt a lot with anxiety and so did her best friend, Jack. I like that Haleigh was in her mid-twenties and didn’t feel like she had her life together. I could really relate to Haleigh. I also liked the fact that she was plus sized. I am excited to find out that the author has other books which I will definitely be reading. This will keep me going until the author has another book out. Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin’s Press for the ARC. All opinions expressed are my own.

Bi Romance For The Younger Millennial / Zoomer Set. If you have an ounce of work ethic in your pinky finger, you've got more than our female lead and narrator of this tale. Which means you're likely going to find her quite annoying, at the very least. If you're not a fan of bisexual women or the term "cishet" (to be clear, the second thing there is only used a time or two that I noticed), maybe skip this book. If you need the spice of a Carolina Reaper or at least a Scotch Bonnet... eh, you're not going to like this one much either. If you're not a fan of romance novels that could have been a five minute mature conversation a decade ago... you're probably not going to like this book. If you're not a fan of trigger warnings at the front of books... well, this one has a couple of pages of them.

With all of *that* dispensed with, welcome. If you're still here and still interested in this book, know that for what it is, it is reasonably solid. Maybe a touch squishy in some areas and maybe rolling a bit after the rest of it has stopped moving a time or two, but good enough to be enjoyable for those that can suspend their disbelief for a few hours and just go with the story as presented.

And the story as presented *is* a fat bi chick version of a fairly standard plot device in romance books - multiple dates with different people set up by some friend/ family group, except the best friend winds up inserting himself into them and... well, like I said, its been done more than enough for you to know exactly how this goes. While there is more spice than the "clean" / "sweet" crowd will likely prefer, there also isn't really enough to "give them the vapors" either, so on that point it is somewhere in between. The romance itself, as a form of second chance / these kids should have had a mature conversation a decade ago and could have been together this entire time, still works for what it is.

Really the areas that this book - and all of Howe's books - break a bit of ground is their acceptance of "larger bodies", but Howe openly notes in that same trigger warning at the front of the book that in order to make this particular story work, she had to trim down the more typical nearly screaming from the rooftops level of "fat pride" / "fat acceptance"/ however you want to phrase that... and yes, to an extent, it shows in the way the story is told and ultimately in how the story flows.

And yet, with all of this noted, there really were no technical errors noted here, and thus this book could work well for someone looking for something atypical during the Holiday season that isn't a "holiday book".

Very much recommended.

This was a cute story. The anxiety/mental health rep was well written and accurate. I love that it included a plus size character as the FMC. The dates that Hayleigh finds herself on had me laughing at times. I didn’t really care for the way she acted in the story as she seemed immature for her age but overall it was still a good read and I would recommend it.

This book was cute . I liked reading about the dates
Haleigh went on , but the connection between Haleigh and jack just didn’t feel real the chemistry wasn’t there for me .

3.5* rounded up!

This was a cute, predictable romcom and I'm not complaining about that! You knew what was going to happen early on, but the story to get there was still cute. The characters were perfectly imperfect and some of the dates made me LOL.

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for the eARC of this book in exchange for my honest review.

*I will also repost my review with a "Happy Pub Day!" post on Instagram on Dec. 10.

How to Get a Life in Ten Dates begins with Haleigh, a plus size girlie who is tired of dating (refreshingly not because she's plus size but because her dates suck!) so she gets her friends and fam to set her up with two people each. These dates are absolutely ridiculous like you can never predict what is gonna happen because they are so harebrained and so funny that it really balances out the main story line of Haleigh being tired of dating AND trying to figure out what to do about her job AND the fact that she's still in love with her best friend, Jack...👀
There's so much that happens in this story: there's happiness, sadness, grief, feeling lost, but also confidence, love, and growth. I really love a good balanced book that can have personal growth but also is a rom-com at heart.
As well, I was a little nervous with all of these dates that there would be some fat-phobic issues (like there are in a lot of plus size books) BUT that was not the case! The only fat-phobic issue was Haleigh bringing up the fact that restaurants sometimes don't account for plus size people when designing the table set-up (which is TRUE)! And I love that Haleigh being fat wasn't a reason for her not being loved or her being insecure! We love to see it!🫶
Thanks so much to St. Martin's Press for an early copy of this book! I was so excited to read it after reading The Make-Up Test and cannot wait to read more by Jenny L. Howe!

I really wanted to like this book more than I did. I liked the story and the authors intention, but it didn’t work in execution. The FMC blamed everyone else (or her anxiety) for anything that went wrong in her life. (I also suffer from anxiety/depression). I wish she could have owned more of her choices. And the MMC was like a spoiled child with a toy - he only wanted it when he was about to have it taken away. Sorry, but it just didn’t work for me. Thanks to SMP for the ARC.

How to Get a Life in Ten Dates is a standalone companion to On the Plus Side, also by Howe. Some characters overlap, but you can read them in any order. Isn’t that always a good thing?

Where were these books when I was younger? As someone who has struggled with their weight their whole life, it was always disappointing to never see myself in the characters in the books I read. If there was a plus-sized character, she was either the main character’s best friend or the butt of jokes.

Another thing that is discussed in the book is Haleigh’s anxiety. Howe uses Haleigh’s anxiety and Jack’s mental health issues as well to help people better understand their own. She mentions in her notes at the beginning of the book that she has the same mental health diagnosis and felt the need to include them in her story. Howe explains that she hopes to remove the stigmas attached to that diagnosis by including them in How to Get a Life in Ten Dates.

Overall, How to Get a Life in Ten Dates is a fun rom-com. Some dates Haleigh finds herself in are too funny and tragically realistic. I’m sure everyone has been in one of these situations and can laugh it off now. If you haven’t, you’ve been in something similar and can still laugh at them. If you are looking for a quick, funny rom-com with a few scenes that fade to gray, you should grab a copy of How to Get a Life in Ten Dates.