It's a bit stiff, which could be a sign that the author wrote it herself. It's not polished, and it's pleasing to know that those comments about her family could be authentic. Once I got used to the voice and cadence, I found it quite enjoyable.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

This book ended up not really being my cup of tea and I think I have learned I am not interested in self-help books. My favorite parts were when Jinger explained her lived experiences and how those instances were driven by her people pleasing self because I saw some of my own experiences within those. I did struggle with some of the dives into why we fall into people pleasing tendencies and the let’s connect sections.

People Pleaser by Jinger Vuolo was the author's second solo book which I have read, and a very intirguing read at that. It was part self help, part autobiography, meant to be a guide for anyone who tends to please others while forgoing one's own needs. By overcoming these people-pleasing tendencies, one can find true purpose and identity in life, no longer living in the shadows of others perceptions, thoughts, and projections. It's a really great concept, and makes a lot of sense, considering the author's background and childhood. Vuolo is incredibly vulnerable in this book to be able to share her message, and that makes it much more relatable for the reader, which in turn drives the message home even more. I could see this book being a good option for a personal library for teenage girls, because the message given is so important to that age group. In reality, it is good for all ages, because we can all get caught up in people pleasing just to "keep the peace" or to avoid conflict, instead option to do what you are told because it is easier in the short term. While reading, I could notice some of these behaviors in myself in the past in a dangerous relationship, and that realization (which i already knew and worked through and healed from), but that realization recognized so bluntly was just a sad moment for who I used to be and what I used to allow, similar to some facets of Vuolo's story. I am certain that her words have helped many women young and old see just how difficult or even dangerous these people pleasing tendencies can get in one's life, when applied to people who are not trustworthy. Furthermore, overcoming this tendency, so to speak, gives one freedom and ultimately points to the freedom found in Christ; It is only by seeking to do His will and please Him, that we will have freedom and new life. Overall a great message, and I'd certainly recommend this to others!

I was given this book from the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for a review, all opinions expressed are my own.

Are you a people pleaser? Can you even begin to measure how the approval of others has shaped your heart and mind? Your faith and relationships? Your habits and identity? In People Pleaser, New York Times bestselling author Jinger Vuolo shares her personal journey of constantly seeking approval from others and how she found her true identity.

I didn't really watch the show, but was curious about Jinger's book, and this was an interesting read. She seems like she has a good head on her shoulders, and I'm glad that she has found religion on her own terms, which seems like a much healthier way than how she grew up.

Thank you Netgalley and W Publishing | Thomas Nelson for the ARC!

I can't say I was the biggest fan of the show or the family. However, I wanted to give this book a chance, and see what life was like through the eyes of a member of the family.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC.

A good book with lots of scripture reference, but it did seem a bit drawn out in some parts and repetitive. Almost like she was trying to meet a word requirement.

Thank you so much Net Galley for giving me the option to review this book!

This was a little more religious than I expected. I haven't seen or read anything from this family before so I learned a few things in this novel.

ARC Review:

Jinger Vuolo, formally Duggar, will always be affiliated with the reality television shows she grew up on; 19 Kids and Counting (including all of its former iterations) and Counting On. The world was fascinated by this unusually large family (Duggar) and their outlook on faith, how to raise up children, and day-to-day living. While the Duggars were under constant scrutinization for their ideology, it can be argued that viewers found their form of courtship to be the most controversial.

Growing up in a cult (a fundamentalist offshoot of Christianity) and household that prioritized a legalistic lifestyle, Jinger desired to meet the expectations of Bill Gothard, her parental authorities, and fellow members of her church. Unfortunately, this unattainable goal led her to sacrifice her true, authentic self in favor of being a “people pleaser”. Her goal in penning her latest memoir, People Pleasers: Breaking Free From the Burden of Imaginary Expectations, is to share her journey as a self-proclaimed “people pleaser” and how she is actively seeking to overcome it.

While this book is a memoir, it is so much more. It combines Biblical lessons with practical tips on how readers can identify and escape the pressure to please others. Jinger does a fairly good job of leading by example. The majority of the book involves her taking a critical look into her past, in order to pinpointing the genesis of her problem, and reveals how she still struggles to erase the harmful thought processes that lead her to being a “people pleaser”. She freely admits this is an ongoing process and while she is not completely cured of being a “people pleaser” she is making great strides.

Special thanks to Netgalley, Thomas Nelson, W Publishing, and Jinger Vuolo for allowing me to read this book in exchange for my honest review.

Admittedly, I expected more memoir than self-help out of this text, and that left me disappointed. Jinger does use her background to inform her writing, however the style of the book is very cookie-cutter Christian self-help, complete with Bible verses to pair with every section. I'm not religious anymore, so I found it hard to relate to some of the subject matter even though I am 100% a people pleaser. I felt that Jinger gave good advice and asked thought-provoking questions, but didn't have anything groundbreaking to say. I found myself not excited to pick up this read, which made it a struggle to finish unfortunately.

I love reading books by Jinger and her sisters. Its always interesting to me to get to see what their thoughts on everything are after the show and stuff.

This book wasn't really for me. I don't know what I was expecting from this book, and I just couldn't really get into it. I like the idea of a book trying to help with recovering from being a people pleaser, but this didn't really work for me.

This book is so relevant. Jinger has always had a way of relating to women and this book is no exception. I needed every word of affirmation this book has given me.

Thank you to the publisher and netgalley for allowing me to read and review this book. All opinions are my own.

I have followed the Duggar’s story for as long as I can remember and feel a pull to several of the older siblings. When I requested this book on NetGalley, I did so blindly without reading the description (as I do with 90% of the books I decide to read) but I really wish I would have gotten an idea of what I was requesting. This was not my vibe. Memoirs? Absolutely. Self-help? No, thank you.

I appreciate her willingness to share her experience with people-pleasing and relate on many levels to the different situations but the writing was very choppy and geared mainly towards those who are of the same faith as her. This book could have been condensed into a one hour podcast (I’m being very generous with the time frame here).

This would be appropriate for anyone who is of the Christian faith and seeking to conform to a single path of being “cured” from “people pleasing”.

Unlike some other readers, I didn't want or expect a "Duggar tell-all," and am glad that Jinger is trying to move toward other types of writing, a natural extension of the "spiritual freedom" focus of Becoming Free Indeed. However, the packaging and marketing did seem to imply more of the "memoir" focus than the "Christian living" emphasis.
The topic was explored well, and Jinger's writing is personable. I especially appreciated how flexibly she used the chapter-end discussion questions, sometimes including a verse or prayer prompt.

“People Pleaser: Breaking Free from the Burden of Imaginary Expectations” by Jinger Duggar Vuolo, offers a candid exploration of the author’s journey from seeking external approval to finding her true identity through faith. Drawing from personal experiences, Jinger delves into the challenges of growing up in a strict religious environment, where the desire to meet others’ expectations often overshadowed her sense of self. The book provides insights into overcoming people-pleasing tendencies by embracing one’s faith and understanding one’s worth in the eyes of God. I appreciate the personal anecdotes and scriptural references, while a desire for more practical applications and find the writing style occasionally challenging. Overall, “People Pleaser” serves as a reflective guide for those grappling with the need for external validation, encouraging a shift towards seeking divine approval and authentic self-expression.

I did not realize that it was a self-help book and thought it was another story about her life. I have been drawn into the Duggars life through reality TV and am always interested in what they have to say especially after growing up in the limelight. This was not that kind of book, but more of a self-help or book of advice for those who are “people pleasers” like her. It was well-written and an easy read but I found myself skipping over much of the religious references and skimming some sections. She doesn’t claim to know all but is courageous enough to tell of her struggles and how she is trying to overcome her fears and doubts and the “people pleasing” part of her that feels more negative. I love her candid approach to it but just wasn’t expecting this so I didn’t like it as much as I thought I might.

As someone who has always been a people pleaser, I never really understood how much it took a toll on my heart and soul. I didn't understand how much of my life was to please all those around me, whether I knew it was the right thing to do or not. This book was great to read, and I now understand that I can't please all those around me. I have to please myself first and put God first in my life. I know that God knows that I do the good in my life, and I know those who don't. However, this book was a little challenging because I couldn't get past that I am so much like Jinger, minus the large family or TV status. If you're looking to see if you too are a people pleaser or you're just looking for a good, Christian book to read, then this is the one for you.

I should start by saying I have always enjoyed watching The Duggars; first as a TV show that in hindsight was horrible. Now, I enjoy watching some of the now grown children, including Jinger, find her voice and speak her own truth. I have read her previous book and enjoyed them just as I have People Please.

Listen, these books are always going to have a religious undertone, but I find as a non-Christian I can still enjoy them. I skim over some sentences and bible quotes and still have an enjoyable read. This book does deviate from her previous as it reads more as a bible study guide or sermon which I wasnt exactly prepared for. I did however appreciate her vulberability, the sharing of her truth and the way this book was outlined did provide a few lessons and reasons for me to evaluate my own people pleasing tendencies.

After following Jinger Vuolo for several years and reading her previous book, I continue to be impressed by her openness in sharing her struggles growing up on television and finding her way as an adult. She always walks a fine line of being honest and seeking to better herself while never putting her family down, and I respect her for that. If you are looking for dirt on the Duggars or hoping for a tell-all, this is not it. If you wish to take a journey with the author toward pleasing God more than you seek to please people, then this is the book for you.
While she does use many examples from her own life, even more she uses examples from the Bible and always directs the conversation back to Jesus. I found myself relating to much of what she had to say as she perfectly put into words what I never could for myself. She has a wonderful gift for not holding back while still speaking the truth in love. I especially appreciate that she has not thrown her faith away but is following only Jesus on a new and better path.
One of the points made that has stuck with me is that people pleasing is like a panic room, but a panic room is a dead end. To find out more about that, as well as how to gain ultimate freedom from destructive patterns, in a format that is approachable and easy to read while getting directly to the heart of the matter, I cannot recommend this book highly enough. I eagerly look forward to more books from this author as her story continues to unfold.
*I received a complimentary copy of this e-book from NetGalley and Thomas Nelson Publishing. All thoughts and opinions are my own.