Another re-release of the Spires series.

This is probably my favourite (though I may have said that about each of them). On the surface it’s a story about a former bully going back home and falling in love with the kid he bullied growing up. Except it’s a lot more than that. It’s a slightly melancholy love letter to the North. It’s a bully realising that regardless of his intentions, he has seriously hurt someone he cares about. It’s about figuring out what where you fit when home doesn’t feel so much like home any more. And it’s about trying to figure out what you want because you want it, and what you want because society says you should.

Alfie, now a successful London based investment banker, goes back to South Shields and develops a serious interest in Fen, a small, hot, feisty man who is running a flower shop. Alfie doesn’t properly fit either in London or in South Shields. He struggles with being whatever- enough, manly enough or gay enough or northern enough. Fen is aggressive and bristly and dealing with some deep trauma from the passing of his mum. Alfie is looking to provide for people and figure out how to exist.

The first time I read this book, I felt like the plot was resolved pretty much halfway through, and wondered why there was so much extra book. But on re-reads, and particularly with the additional author notes I appreciate the complexity of what the book is actually about, not just Alfie and Fen getting together, but figuring out how to be themselves, what shape they want life to be, and how to unpick what a happy and satisfying life looks like together.

“Honestly, by the end of an average day, making even the smallest decisions sometimes feels impossible.”

I just love Alexis Hall. I have enjoyed all of his books and this one is no different. All of his books are so quirky and the about the author sections are truly wonderful. This book’s says “Alexis Hall is a connoisseur of puddings. He is particularly partial to crumble.” And that’s it. The dry British humor is always balanced with serious topics so well. It's such a delicate balance that doesn't always work, but the way Hall writes it works perfectly.

I went into this one pretty blind and I was surprised that the plot revolves around Alfie picking up the boy he used to bully back in school at a bar. When he finally realizes who Fen is, he feels immense guilt and wants to apologize. Fen is rightly resentful and from there they start a back and forth that doesn’t seem sustainable. There's previous trauma for the years Alfie spent bullying Fen, and Alfie has unresolved tension with his parents after coming out. It feels like Alfie isn't quite comfortable with himself and that spills into his burgeoning relationship with Fen.

I loved both Alfie and Fen. They have so much love for each other, but for Alfie it’s as if he doesn’t know how to give himself to Fen. There has been tension between him and his family since he came out and it’s clearly so difficult for him. Fen is still reeling from him mother’s death and feels a connection to her flower shop that he’s taken over. The conversations they have, while sometimes redundant, are realistic and vulnerable. This is something Hall always does so well.

“It’s harder, sometimes, to live with choices that aren’t yours.”

Even though this feels just a bit long, that didn’t stop me from enjoying this immensely and loving these characters. Through the difficulties, there are some really beautiful moments. I also wish a few things had some resolution, specifically with Alfie and his father, but the overall arcs for both Alfie and Fen are excellent.

Beautiful story. Characters were written well and plot was entertaining! This was my first book by this author and I’m definitely excited to read more! 4 stars recommendation!

Thank you to NetGalley for the advanced copy. I am really enjoying reading Alexis Hall. I was a little surprised to learn that this book had previously been released and was on NetGalley for the rerelease. I had never come across that.

I did enjoy the book and the story between Alfie and Fen. It was a great reminder that everything is never black and white. There is always a back story and lots of feelings. Sometimes attraction is not enough. Reading about flawed characters with trauma and history feels right to me.

The story of Fen's mother is beautiful. His loyalty to her is ultimately making him miserable. I think it is beautiful how much he wants to take care of her flower shop and the things she loved...but how long can he live in limbo like that. Running into Alfie pulls him out of the spiral he has been on...stirring up lots of past trauma as well. Fen helps Alfie find a more fulfilling life as well. Together they are able to provide what is missing in the other mans life.

Thanks to @netgalley and @sourcebookscasa for the eArc of this book.

Alfie Bell returns to his hometown for a wedding where he runs into Fen who he used to bully in school. Alfie wants to try and fix the past and the story really centers around them reconnecting and trying to build a new relationship.

Both of these characters are struggling in their own ways, but I love that they’re able to share their feelings and kind of work together to help each other.

Yes, this is a love story (you do get some spice), but it’s so much more than that. It’s about the complexities of romantic and familial relationships, dealing with grief, discovering your sexual identity and overcoming your past.

The only thing I will say is that it is a touch too long, but it’s just a little extra time to spend with Alfie and Fen.

Pansies is moving and lovely, but I also can’t remember ever laughing aloud so much while reading. The humor and inside jokes were right up my alley and I adored every moment!

Alfie Bell grew up in a small town in northern England. Possessing good looks, a limited worldview, and skill in all the typical masculine pursuits, it took him twenty-eight years to realize he was gay. Now thirty and a successful London investment banker, he’s still trying to figure out…well, everything. Home for a wedding, he stumbles across the fascinating Fen and shoots his shot, unaware this is James O’Donaghue, another kid from school. But Fen never forgot the handsome Alfie, who bullied him relentlessly and haunted his nightmares and fantasies. And he’s carrying plenty of other baggage as well. Cue the flying of the sparks!

In the foreword of this re-release, Alexis Hall says this book could be his most ambitious, and I can totally see why. Dealing with themes of masculinity, sexuality, acceptance, home, grief, family, and of course, love, it’s a lot to take on but I think he nailed it. Alfie and Fen are so completely human, messy and fallible.

The writing is evocative in the way I love. Fen’s grief and the way it clashes and soars with his tempestuous feelings toward Alfie paint a moving picture of a person clawing their way back. And Alfie. I love Alfie so entirely. He has such simple wants and dreams, and his struggle to feel like he’s “enough” in any respect had my heart going out to him. The side characters are also great - Gothshelley steals every scene she’s in!

Pansies is a whirlwind romance, both men falling hard but fighting circumstances from outside themselves and within. The spice is as intense and steamy as I expected after reading For Real, but there is less of it than in Toby and Laurie’s book. I look forward to picking up the other books in this series, and I wholeheartedly recommend to all! Check CWs as needed.

*I received an advance reader copy from NetGalley and am voluntarily leaving my review*

Alexis Hall has done it again with PANSIES!

The Spires series just keeps getting better! Alexis Hall returns to the beloved series with Pansies, bringing along an overflow of extras and bonus content for days. In this installment, we follow Alfie and Fen, two characters who first met in high school under… complicated circumstances. Years later, with both of them older and (hopefully!) wiser, they’re back in each other’s orbit. But as in any classic Spires tale, their path to real connection isn’t smooth—they’ll need to grow, forgive, and face some hard truths if they hope to find their way to each other.

What I love about the Spires series is how each couple’s journey feels fresh, yet connected through recurring themes (and a few delightful cameos!). In Pansies, the emotional themes are especially powerful, and they’ll devastate readers in the best way. The portrayal of grief, particularly through Fen’s relationship with his mother, is both moving and beautifully written. Some chapters even take the form of Fen’s letters to his mother, offering a unique and touching window into his world. These letters add so much depth, letting us feel his journey, even though we’re mostly seeing things from Alfie’s perspective.

Speaking of Alfie—he’s adorable! Watching him navigate his own understanding of what it means to be gay, with a little help from his friends, is both heartwarming and relatable. Alfie’s tough-yet-tender personality is a joy to read; he’s that perfect mix of rough around the edges but a softie at heart. Pansies is everything fans of this series crave: funny, romantic, adorable, and filled with moments that tug at the heartstrings. Readers are in for a treat!

Only Alexis Hall can make a book funny and still make you feel every emotion of the characters.
I loved this . Its the perfect romantic buy spicy book to pick up.

Thanks to NetGalley for the Arc
All opinions are my own.

Of few things am I sure in life, and one of those is that Alexis Hall never disappoints! 🌟 The Spires series had me hooked since Glitterland, and somehow, each book just gets better and better. But Pansies? It’s on a whole other level. 💫 I absolutely loved the northern English atmosphere—Alexis describes it so well, I felt like I was back there (yes, I lived near South Shields for a while)!

Beyond the setting, Alfie’s struggle with his identity is so embedded in northern British culture, it’s palpable. I felt his bro-y, alpha exterior, wrestling with his identity and the embedded desire to just be “normal,” while Fen, sad, and lost and sweetly quirky, is there to show him a different way. It’s not just a love story; it’s two people becoming their best selves, realizing what they truly want, and loving and saving each other despite their differences. 🥰

This book might be a little less ´funny´ than other Alexis Hall stories, but the emotions are definitely there—I laughed, got upset, cried, and fell in love with every single word in these 430 pages. 📚💖

Pansies is out today, and if you don’t pick it up, you’re missing out. This one, and the entire Spires series (which is four standalones you can read in any order), are truly unforgettable. 🌈✨

Yet another excellent Alexis Hall novel. Of the Spires stories so far, Pansies could have pushed Glitterland out of my top spot. Alfie is a precious bean learning to come to terms with who he was and who he is and Fen is so full of self certainty while being a lost soul. They were so easy to root for even if mad when they were being dummies.

Two things I always enjoy about Hall's work is the portrayal of complex family dynamics and friendship groups. I first fell in love with this in Boyfriend Material and have loved seeing more of this in the Spires novels, especially in Pansies with the north/south divide.

I look forward to reading many more stories by Alexis Hall.

Alexis Hall writes funny romance without losing any of the emotion, and Pansies is no exception. I read the updated release that includes annotations in the back, and they really added to the experience for me: they range from serious remarks on writing (e.g. why this specific scene now? Why this specific choice for these characters?) to fun reflections on Hall's feelings encountering the book again after 10 years. If you've ever read any of his Goodreads reviews, the annotations are in the same vein. (Great Goodreads follow, BTW!)

This specific book is about Alfie and Fen. They grew up together in an industrial town in the North of England. Fen was a small boy who never felt like he belonged, which was reinforced by the bullying he received from the other boys at school. Alfie was a "regular" boy who couldn't let anyone know like he felt he didn't belong ... meaning that Alfie was one of Fen's chief tormentors for years. But now they've both grown up, and Alfie has realized he's gay. When he's back in town to attend his best friend's wedding, he picks Fen up at a bar without recognizing him. Fen is both annoyed that the bully who loomed so large in his past doesn't recognize him, but also turned on and ready for some wish fulfillment/revenge. When Alfie realizes who Fen is, he tries to make it up to him ... and the book moves on from there.

The book is told from Alfie's limited 3rd person POV with chapter breaks of Fen writing letters to his mother. It's heartbreaking and illuminating to read through Alfie's eyes: as a reader you can sympathize with him while also shouting at him "Don't do that, Alfie! Noooo!" almost like you're watching a horror movie. He tries so hard to overcome his cultural conditioning, but often doesn't even realize that it's there.

Also note that this book is real horny, so you'd best be prepared to read about Alfie and Fen getting it on, like, a LOT. (I say this for everyone expecting to pick up a book like Boyfriend Material just as a little heads up.) The spicy scenes are integral to the character development, so make sure you don'g skip over them no matter how hard they make you blush.

This objective review is based on a complimentary copy of the novel.

How do you review a book you’ve read and reread a gazillion times? I read the ARC of the 2024 rerelease of Pansies some weeks ago and I’ve been sitting on this review ever since. I cried, ok? Are you happy now..? Somehow with each reread, it’s a different line or a different angle that gets me. This time it happened to be about a pastry swan in a raspberry coulis and all that it represents: an acknowledgment and an inarticulate apology for wrongs that have been wronged, brave steps towards living authentically despite what your environment seems to expect of you.

Pansies is one of those books that finds a way of seeping into your marrow, or tattooed into your soul or something. I think especially if you’re someone for whom concepts such as home or identity are loaded with complexities. It speaks of home and The North in that super evocative way you just know a deeply familiar place from the way the very particular level of light hits that very specific latitude, or the way its shores sound and smell like, even if you’ve been away for too long and some of the changes make it feel at once strange and new. Pansies is of course also about identity, learning new and surprising things about yourself and your sexuality and continuing to work out who you are and how to reconcile this with who you were. And about grief and loss and learning to live with them and our messy human fallibility.

And Pansies is romantic as fuck. I love that new readers get to meet slightly updated Fen and Alfie. And I love that those of us already in love with this story get to have a glimpse into the backstage areas of the text via the ever engaging author annotations.

Arc received with thanks from NetGalley/Sourcebooks

I thought Pansies, like the rest of the Spires series, and everything else I’ve read by Alexis Hall so far, was wonderful. I’m still not completely sure how I feel about a “second chance” romance with a past bully but there was so much to love outside of that detail. Gothshelley is a gem. While this is the fourth book in the series, you don’t have to read in order, though it seems like that may not hold true for future installments.

5+++
The first page made me shiver already.
Amazing, this is poetry from the highest shelf. This book gave me goosebumps.

After Alfie flies away from his best friend's wedding he ends up in a bar.
Beside him sits a stunning beautiful young man, he offers him a drink. This drink was refused.
When Alfie leaves the bar, the young man comes after him and what follows is a hot, and sexy night. They are amazing together. And Alfie is under the spell of this young man.

Fen recognized the man who entered the bar immediately, the bully.

It's harsh to see Fen struggling with his feelings.
And ditto for Alfie who has trouble seeing reality. He is quite narrow-minded and doesn't understand himself or the world around him.

The unbalanced relationship is hard. I doubted their compatibility outside the physical side.
The characters are well-developed. Their dialogues are real and diverting.
The author has a poetical way of writing, quite impressive.

Highly recommended!

I have loved every single one of the Spires stories as they've been updated and re-released (and how gorgeous are the new covers!?) and Pansies is no exception. Each book in the series stands alone, with minimal overlap of side characters, albeit with the overarching theme of exploring many and varied types of queer relationships in a 'real' British setting (Hall notes in the foreword: "As a British author writing for what I am deeply aware is a primarily American audience, I really want to make sure that I’m portraying a version of my country that doesn’t just get reduced to chocolate box villages, ancient university towns, and London. It’s important to me that I write at least a little bit about those Cities You’ll Never See On Screen, the steel towns and port towns and resort towns."). As a fellow Brit this means I feel incredibly 'at home' in all the books, but I think for readers all over the world it's wonderful to see a different slice of British culture in books - and in the case of this book - enjoy some of the dialects and local peculiarities that come with that. Going into this book I was apprehensive, as 'former bully to lover' as a trope is one I avoid like the plague, because it's usually so bluntly treated (by authors I suspect have never been bullied) and something overcome quickly in a fireball of irresistible lust, but I trust this author so I dove in despite reservations and was delighted to find this book just as magic as all the others in the Spires universe. The whole book is a slow roll of unfolding, learning, relearning and developing not just for the MCs but the families around them and for the reader too. There's no single action that can make an apology for bad behaviour 'right', or make someone who thinks of queerness as 'wrong' suddenly be okay with it, just as there's no one day where you wake up and grief is 'gone' and these complex personal journeys happening side by side for Alfie and Fen make this book quite emotionally intense, but with all the unexpected joy, wit and easter eggs of cultural minutiae that Hall is a master of writing. Unusually for a queer book, the book opens with a heterosexual love story, but trust me, that all makes sense in time (and may break your heart too). Like all the Spires books, I have far too many highlighted passages, a mixture of quotes heartfelt, funny, deliciously dirty or referencing things touchingly familiar.

Pansies is my favorite of all the existing Spires books, though I love them all for different reasons (and Waiting for the Flood is a very, very, very close second). Part of why I love Pansies so much is because the characters fall in love so quickly and yet it feels real and I never, not for one second, feel unconvinced by the depth of feeling and commitment Alfie and Fen have for each other. How amazing is that, considering their bully/bullied history? There's something really vulnerable in opening yourself up to experiencing rapid, intense connection with another human that I really admire. There's so much more I could say about Pansies and how it speaks to me, but ultimately, for me, this is a book that celebrates honoring your feelings and where they lead you, no matter what you and others think you "should" do otherwise.

I should add, for those who have read a prior edition and are on the fence about getting the rerelease version, that the author annotations are a fantastic addition. They provide so much insight into the South Shields setting and scene work. They're worth their weight in gold, in my opinion.

So I was lucky enough to get an advance reader copy of this book—thanks Netgalley and Sourcebook Casablanca.
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It seems a little odd to be reviewing a book I first read five or six years ago, and have re-read more than once since then. But it’s being re-released on Tuesday (5 November) with a sweet new cover. Also new are annotations from the author, which give a fascinating insight into all sorts of background details, from what he was aiming for when writing a particular scene, to details about a (real) restaurant the characters visit, to the etymology of particular dialect words and phrases.
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It’s safe to say I’ve never met an Alexis Hall novel I didn’t like. I love this one and have read it several times, each time picking up on something that has a stronger resonance for me this time round. This book is basically the story of Alfie Bell, who returns to his home town of South Shields, having forged a successful career and made a lot of money, and, since living in a mileu that allows it to be thinkable, has realised that he’s gay. In South Shields he reconnects with Fen, the queer kid at their school. The book’s about a lot of things: bullying and its ramifications, Fen’s grieving for his mother, Alfie’s struggles with masculinity and queerness, life in a regional town, and finding home. And as always with Hall, it’s sexy, swooningly romantic and has its very funny moments.
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As I said, different aspects have resonated with me over the years. This time I found some of the most poignant and moving sections are when Alfie talks to his Dad, (“Dad, why does it matter that I’m gay?”) maybe because now I have fully adult children myself. Alfie Senior is gruff and far more comfortable discussing the transmission of a broken down van than expressing love for his son. Alfie is hurt by what he feels is his father’s lack of acceptance. But

…he sighed. “Ye’d understand, if ye had bairns of your own.”
“I might, someday.”
“Ye want ‘em happy. That’s all ye want.”
And that was when Alfie recognised what he was seeing, right there in front of him, etched into the lines surrounding that stern mouth, those deep-set eyes. It was sadness. His dad was…sad.
“Hang on”—he blinked back a damp burning in his eyes—you think being gay means I won’t be happy?”
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A gorgeous romance with substance, humour, and the best chips in South Shields.

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Thank you so much to Alexis Hall and Sourcebooks Casablanca for the ARC of the Pansies re-release!

Alfie and Fen meet for the first time at a bar in their hometown - except Fen remembers Alfie from school, back before the former bully had known he was gay and instead messed with Fen for being flamboyant. Now that he's learned more about himself, Alfie is determined to repair Fen's view of him in order to win his heart... but love is complicated, and Fen has more to work through than what another boy from his town put him through.

Pansies is my introduction to Alexis Hall's writing style, and considering I (intentionally) didn't look too closely at the plot summary, this was the most delightful surprise of a book I could have asked for. Alfie is raw and real and full of internalized homophobia in a way that doesn't really get voiced in most novels. I'm so grateful to get to watch a character like him learn, grow, and come out the other side a better person.

On the flip side we have Fen, who is dealing with a deeply complex form of grief that not many people can relate to. I loved watching how his guard would pop up and fall away so openly, demonstrating how authentic and unfiltered he is. Together, their dynamic is electric and so beautiful.

In other notes, this is definitely a pretty spice heavy book, though there was a lot of purpose behind most of the scenes. I'll also mention that the bonus content in this book contains annotations from across the novel. LOVED reading through these and seeing the amount of depth Alexis has coating the backgrounds of every character that wasn't lost in the context of the story.

Overall loved it! I can't wait to read the rest of the Spires series and I'm sure I'll dive into the rest of Alexis Hall's work soon. Thank you again for the ARC!

I love Alexis Hall, and how they have a particular way with contemporary romance that is so intense but also cute at the same time. I've read a few of the Spires books that are being republished and the vibes are a little different (less cute, more kink), but still you can see similar thematic threads. In particularly the complexity of relationships and emotional connection beyond inital attraction and even just enjoying each others company. When you read an Alexis Hall book you really feel a hell of a lot.
One of the main things I liked about Pansies, was the thread about Fen's grief, and working out how to move forward form it, as well as the complexities of figuring out how life might look different to how he had previously wanted it. I thought there was a lot of nuance and compassion in the story, expecially on trying to navigate protective boundaries but also being open to people changing.
I also like how it was set outside of London, which often only ahppens in books if they're in a quaint village or something, so I appreciated the opportunitiy to experience place somewhere different.

Although I enjoyed Waiting for the Flood, Chasing the Light, and For Real, I struggled to read this book. I kept dipping in and out, but neither the story nor the characters hooked me, I’m afraid. I’ll probably give it another go in a few months and update my review then.

I received an advance copy via NetGalley.