As a fellow "old mom" I was excited to read this book. I found myself identifying with the author quite a bit but I wasn't compelled to keep reading the book. It took me months to read, which is very out of the ordinary. It's hard to rate because I liked the stories but I wasn't compelled to keep reading them.

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲, 𝐟𝐨𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧. 𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐲 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭—𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭-𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝟒𝟎𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡-𝐨𝐮𝐭-𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐥 “𝐩𝐥𝐨𝐭” 𝐨𝐫 “𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞” 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬/𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭. 𝐈 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈’𝐦 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 (𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈’𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝟒𝟎𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭), 𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲 𝐢𝐭.

𝒯𝒽𝒶𝓃𝓀 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓉𝑜 𝒥𝓊𝒹𝓎 𝐻𝒶𝓋𝑒𝓈𝑜𝓃, 𝒥 𝒫𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝐵𝑜𝑜𝓀𝓈, & 𝒩𝑒𝓉𝒢𝒶𝓁𝓁𝑒𝓎 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒜𝑅𝒞! 𝒜𝓁𝓁 𝑜𝓅𝒾𝓃𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓂𝓎 𝑜𝓌𝓃.

As a 40 year old mom of a toddler, I thought this memoir sounded interesting. Reading another mom’s perspective about the being an older mom was an intriguing concept. I also had some things in common with the author: I live in south Texas, I lived in NYC and I have a parent that lives in south FL. That’s about where there similarities end. The author, after having her child, had a nanny constantly caring and raising her child, she is very privileged and doesn’t seem to have many real struggles. I am in no way knocking her for this. Good for her, she has been blessed…but it makes relating to her in any way very difficult. So although I am also an older mom, I had struggles and difficulties that the author didn’t because a nanny did a lot of the day to day work with her child.

Also, the author was very repetitive, almost like she couldn’t trust that the reader could remember what they read just a few pages back. This happened several time with several subjects, like COVID, Jack’s blood disorder, the sandwich generation, and phrases like “I said to Adam…” and “Growing up in Texas/Houston…” When someone would reappear in the narrative, she would almost reintroduce them every time. It was annoyingly repetitive.

Finally, the story isn’t written linearly which was frustrating, especially toward the end of the book. She began, it had seemed, discussing about things in a chronological order, but as the book progressed, she began to bounce back-and-forth between when she was younger when her son was younger again, or she would go forward to when he was in middle school. It was just kind of all over the place. Towards the beginning/middle of the book an incident happened with her son where they ended up in the ER and she mentioned the blood disorder her son had. Then almost towards the end of the book, she explained another incident when they ended up at the ER but that occurred before the first one she mentioned. And when she brought this one up, she explained all their concerns like I didn’t just read about it.

Her story was very interesting and there were things that I enjoyed reading about. I really think a big majority of the problem that I had with this book was an editing issue. If she had someone to edit this more efficiently and help her re-organize it, take out some of the repetitiveness, you can move past the unrelatable-ness part because she does have an interesting story here.
***Thank you NetGalley, J Press Books, and Judy Haveson for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.***

Such a great read! Highly recommend this one.

Many thanks to the author, the publisher, and Netgalley for my ARC. All opinions are my own.

"Oldest Mom on the Playground" is a series of essays by Judy, who became a mother in her early forties. The book explores her experiences as a first-time older mother, offering glimpses of her son Jack from infancy through his teenage years. As a fellow older mom with children of varying ages, I was intrigued by the title.

Judy's struggle with balancing her role as a full-time mom against leaving a career she had dedicated herself to for years, in order to stay home and care for Jack, deeply resonated with me.

I found the scenes, such as Jack's Bar Mitzvah, his moving-up ceremony, and the heartfelt letter Judy wrote to him, as well as her final interaction with her father, to be particularly moving.

While the book offered many enjoyable and humorous moments, its non-chronological structure made it somewhat challenging to follow.

TW: Sexual Assault, Health Issues, Death of  a Loved One, Illness, Miscarriage

Favorite Quotes:
ᥫ᭡ "One of the most significant achievements in a child's life is conquering the fear of something they believe they're too scared to do.."
"..For parents, one of the most significant achievements is conquering the fear of accepting their child is doing something not only the child thought they'd be too scared to do but that we as parents are scared to have them do."

ᥫ᭡ "In these moments, it dawned on me what the symbolism of Jack learning to ride a bike or a scooter represented.  As he grows up, he'll fall and get up many more times, but he'll learn to shake it off, get back up, and keep going.  And if needed, I'll always be ready with a big hug and first aid supplies."

ᥫ᭡ "Stay in touch with friends from childhood; they will always remind you of the person you were and the person you wanted to become, if you're not there yet."

ᥫ᭡ "If given the opportunity, move out of your hometown.  You can go home again if you want to."

ᥫ᭡ "If I can pass anything on to you about what it means to be a Jew, it's this: Religion is deeply personal and unique for everyone, and I hope you will experience Judaism in how it makes the most sense to you.  For me, being Jewish has always been about faith, family, and tradition.  You can add in food too.  Enjoy the journey."

ᥫ᭡ "Friendships:  Unlike your family and relatives, you can pick your friends.  Choose wisely and understand you don't have to be friends with everyone, and not everyone will be your bestie."

ᥫ᭡ "We spend so much of our lives wanting this and that, and we sometimes forget to count little blessings."

Thank you NetGalley and Xpresso Book Tours for the electronic reader's copy.

I was quite keen to read this book, the whole premise sounded so good.
Unfortunately I found the essays to not be essays, and it weren’t short stories either, nor vignettes. They were just memories - no arch, not within them and not overall in the book.
There’s also no chronological order, and (so?) most of these pieces of writing mention “because I became a mum at 43” or “my friends’ kids were in college already” or a variation on this.

I received a copy from NetGalley in return for my honest opinion.

Thank you to the author, publisher and NetGalley for this digital ARC “Oldest Mom On The Playground” by Judy Haveson in exchange for my honest review.

The book focuses on the authors experiences while navigating motherhood being an older (40+) first time mom. She shows us the many challenges that come along with kids, aging parents and being well into a career when making this big life change.

I found the author to be financially privileged making it hard to relate to her essays. Having multiple nannies and babysitters at her disposal is a privilege many parents do not have. Childcare falls through, no problem for her. Bring your baby to work and the staff will help out. This may be okay some places but not the corporate world I work in. I’m happy she found balance and success but it wasn’t realistic to many.
While many of the essays show a challenge that is relatable to motherhood at first many of the challenges she faced are overcome due to her wealth, not cute funny relatable antidotes. The essays that were relatable I highly enjoyed.

I disliked how the book jumped around time wise. It was not chronological. I enjoyed this book well enough and feel others might if they’re older moms and can overlook the authors privilege or they are in similar situations. The book had potential but for me fell flat.

I absolutely loved this book. Their is so much pressure around woman and the choice of motherhood and the perfect age to have kids, should you have kids, what if you don’t want kids. This was a perfect book to help define motherhood on your own terms.

So many good pieces of goodness in this essay collection. I appreciate the author’s willingness to explore motherhood, relationships, friendships, and more in detail. Bravo! Brave! Entertaining and also hopeful. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.

Thank you to NetGalley, the author and publisher for granting me an ARC copy of this book, in exchange for an honest review.

“Oldest Mom On The Playground” is a collection of essays from the author detailing her experiences through motherhood and life as an older, first time mom.

I’m typically not the one to jump into memoirs and essay type novels but this one sparked my interest as I recently became a new mom myself. While I am not a first time mom in my early forties, this collection of stories from the author does encapsulate the saying that motherhood is a universal and shared experience. I found myself nodding in agreement and understanding for her essays about pregnancy and the early days of being a mom. While my son is still young (only 4 months) and my journey into being a mom is fresh, I enjoyed her recollection of how it has been to raise a child and the letters she added to her son within the novel had me close to tears, thinking about when my own will reach those same milestones.

All in all, I enjoyed this read and I think any mom, new or seasoned, would as well!

As a toddler mom in her 40s, this title immediately drew me in! And while this is about motherhood, it's really about the "stuff" that happens in life and how we navigate through. I like my memoirs with honestly and a side of humor, and that's definitely what this is. There were some good pearls of wisdom sprinkled throughout, and I appreciated that the author let readers into the realities of her world. Thanks to NetGalley for the look at this September 2024 release.

"Oldest Mom on the Playground" by Judy Haveson left me disappointed on multiple levels. The narrative often came across as pretentious and forced, lacking genuine humor and instead feeling tiresome and boring. The book's structure was odd and I liked the idea of a collection of short story’s/essays, they seemed to resemble a collection of blog posts, which made it challenging to stay engaged. While I appreciate the author's perspective on later motherhood, some sections seemed unnecessary and stretched thin, raising questions about whether they merited a full-length book treatment. Overall, while the book had potential, it ultimately failed to deliver a compelling and insightful exploration of its theme.