I was very excited when I saw the title and concept of this book and thought that it would be good refreshing read. Unfortunately, I found that this book, while claiming to be from a Christian perspective, did more to deconstruct Christianity and discredit the Bible than it did to help me to understand God's love and attachment for me.

The strengths of this book is that its author, Michael John Cusick, is clearly a very well read and educated man. He references many thinkers from across the ages. As a person who has done some study in attachment theory, it is clear that he has a solid grasp on attachment theory and how it helps us to understand our human brokenness and need for belonging and love. He proposes his own method for healthy attachment which he calls the 4 S's (seen, soothed, safe, and secure). I think in the end we both would agree that we have a need as human beings to be known and loved by God.

One of the biggest place where I believe that this book fails is that it completely undermines the concept and nature of sin as it has been thought about for millennia. He states that, "sin is basically mishandling our pain." and "sin is the result of turning from divine love" which here and elsewhere seems to reduce sin to a mere attachment problem and reduces all personal responsibility for one's actions.

Another area of concern for me is that this book consistently tells us that the way that Christianity has dealt with a whole variety of problems - sexual problems, addictions, etc. - has been wrong all along. He seems to deconstruct the traditional way of practicing Christianity replacing it with his new psychologized plan where one merely engages the imagination to ensure you feel loved. As a person with training in theology, I find that this is extremely reductionistic and will actually lead to more problems than it proposes to solve.

Finally, I will mention as an additional concern that although the Bible is referenced throughout, it seems that each time a quote is used it is twisted and misused in an attempt to back up the claims of this book rather than used in its traditional understanding which has been accepted by many scholars. One place this is particularly glaring is when the book states, "Death is not a punishment for our disobedience, for our sin." and then goes on to quote Romans 6:23 which flatly states that, "the wages of sin is death." Although there are many other examples.

For these reasons -- and several others -- I feel that I cannot recommend this book to others. However, I do hope that we all can continue to see a fruitful development of the understanding of God's great love for each and every individual soul.

Thank you to NetGalley and Zondervan for an ARC copy of this book.

Human beings are divinely designed for relationship. We are made to connect with others, to receive nurture and care, and to be empowered and equipped to flourish. This is God's desire for us. But that's not how life works out. Even in the healthiest of family systems, we pick up wounds. Every person is in need of healing.

In his book Sacred Attachment, Michael John Cusick offers his perspective as a Christian, psychotherapist, spiritual director, and professor, claiming we all need to be seen, soothed, safe, and secure. He connects the developmental and psychological theory of attachment to human flourishing, growth, and development to all of life. And he believes that our most important attachment is to God. If that attachment has been severed, it is in need of restoration. Cusick believes it can be restored by God and that God's love is extended to us in Christ. In him, we experience life as God's beloved, discovering God's love has and holds us.

This book contains clear illustrations and stories that invite the reader to see and experience the Christian spiritual life with new lenses. Cusick's work has helped him see many ways people struggle to know and experience God, and thereby to walk in the love, joy, hope, and peace that flows forth from a relationship with God. These struggles are described: disillusionment with God, brokenness in human relationships, pain, anger, addiction, fear, anxiety, depression, grief, and others. Cusick gently offers biblical and theological truths that meet the reader in places of hardship, and lights a path where hope and healing are found.

While this book could be read profitably by a broad audience, it seems most directed toward those who have endured trauma, abuse, or a crisis of some kind, including a crisis of faith. This makes sense, as these kinds of experiences have been endured by the author, and they have found transformation when reaching the other side. The way forward is described as a new way of experiencing or seeing the life journey, particularly as it relates to the Christian faith. It is common for Christians to experience transitions in life, moments that can result in transformation. But not all Christians experience these moments traumatically. These experiences might be unsettling, but not devastating. While it can be the case that a deeper faith emerges following a period of doubt, that is not always so.

Further, not all Christian formation experiences are equal. Some churches, by God's grace, nurture disciples who flourish in faith and in life. Some families do well in nurturing the next generation. Some communities are healthier than others. This may be the exception and not the rule. A book like this is not addressed to these exceptional cases, though persons experiencing greater wholeness could benefit by seeing ways to minister to those who have had a different experience. Cusick seems to make universal an experience that may only be more common than not, assuming things about all people that may only be more prevalent in the therapist's office.

The greatest insight of this book is found in our need to develop a healthy attachment to God, from whom we receive life, identity, purpose, belonging, and meaning. This is true. And Cusick removes a number of barriers for those who may not have experienced this kind of attachment to God, helping those who suffer see what is possible. Our wounds need healing. Books like this can be a means of grace for those who are hurting.

I did enjoy some of the content about attachment and how it's important even for our relationship with God. The language felt a little too wishy-washy for me though. I don't know how to describe it other than that it felt a little too much on the therapeutic side of things without as much grounding in Scripture. I don't think the content was bad, I guess I just didn't connect with the language as much even though I do agree with the message adn the content behind it all.

Embodied living by faith is better than explanations about faith. The experience transcends knowledge. Feeling loved is far better than talking about love. Information does not necessarily lead to spiritual formation. We can try hard to grow spiritually but become frustrated at the lack of progress. The key thesis of this book is that divine growth comes from a combination of feeling loved and trusting God. The former comes from being seen, soothed, feeling safe and secure. The latter flows out from the results of the 4S paradigm. This 4S sequence is the essence of the author's "Sacred Attachment." Beginning with being SEEN, we are reminded that God sees us, either directly or via the communities we are in. Being seen virtually means we are understood as we hear the words "I get you." This stage lays the foundation of being SOOTHED where God or our carer(s) say to us: "I've got you." The third stage is SAFE (I've got this) and the final stage is SECURE (Love has me). Author Michael John Cusick believes that these 4S encapsulate our emotional needs and human longings. It sets out for us the path toward Sacred Attachment. Using attachment theory, Cusick believes that spiritual growth is best cultivated when our "immature infant brain" gets attached to a "mature adult brain," so that we can better organize and regulate the way we learn and grow. Our limitations stem from a false paradigm that as long as we do the right things, we will naturally grow. We often believe lies about ourselves or our capabilities. We trust ourselves more than God. Our self-dependence leads us toward the perfectionism trap while Cusick reminds us about the superiority of Hebrew wisdom over Greek philosophy. Using Brain McLaren's words, he affirms that "Hebrew good is better than Greek perfect." Once we recognize our human limitations, that we are broken but not bad, we are ready to turn the page toward confession. Here, Cusick gives us the 5Ws to show us how these affect the way we attach to God. These 5Ws are:
- Wretchedness: We are in exile and we need to find a way back to God as our home.
- Weakness: Own our weaknesses and accept our limitations.
- Woundedness: Have we become overly defensive that we fail to recognize our wounds?
- Warfare: Take up arms to fight the lies around us.
- Wiring: Recognize our form and learn about our own genetics and biological makeup.

Cusick puts together a helpful table to show us the intersection between the 4S and the 5Ws. Understanding this is the key to escaping spiritual exhaustion, which forms the first part of the book. The second part stems from this understanding as we grow our trust in divine love.

My Thoughts
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First, this book combines psychology and spirituality. This book is based on the premise of attachment science, to take us back to the roots of our human makeup. The author recognizes the good intentions of many believers who want to grow spiritually but often find their attempts frustrated. Instead of knowledge accumulation or dependence on set external spiritual methodologies, Cusick takes us back to the roots of personhood and our need to be seen, and soothed, and to be safe and secure. Some readers might question the premise of using attachment science and neuroscience to guide one toward authentic spirituality. This is a subset of the never-ending debate between science and faith. The key to accepting the author's approach is to let Truth lead and guide us. One reminder from the author is about the lies that we believe or others say about us. As long as the Bible is our template and measure of Truth, we can see all other methodologies through God's lens.

Second, this book is best suited for those who have earnestly tried but honestly failed. Written from his own experience with spiritual exhaustion and the many cases of Christians getting discouraged about their spiritual exercises, Cusick takes us back to what it means to be human. Many books about spiritual disciplines and practices tend to ignore our spiritual positions at any one time. They are often written in a generalized manner which does little to help those who need specialized guidance. This book takes us back to the way we have been wired with the assumption of us as infants. That is something we can all identify with.

Finally, this book encourages us to press on with faith and hope from the position of being loved via the 4S. It gives us the needed shot to carry on working on our spiritual disciplines, this time with a better understanding of our limitations and weaknesses. The more we are aware of our need for the 4Ss, our acknowledgment of our 5Ws, and a renewed perspective of our Source for all things, we are on the way toward authentic experience and spiritual growth. While the author purports "Hebrew good as better than Greek perfect," this book's approach seems to be more Greek than Hebrew. Maybe, that is the way we have been wired in our present society. Perhaps, this is intentional. We work on the Greek side while we let God lead us on the Hebrew side. That way, none of us can ever claim that we grow toward God using our own strength and wisdom.

Michael John Cusick is the CEO and founder of Restoring the Soul, an intensive counseling ministry in Denver. He is a licensed professional counselor, spiritual director, and former assistant professor of counseling at Colorado Christian University. Michael is the author of Surfing for God, and his articles have appeared in such places as Relevant, Huffington Post, and Red Letter Christians. He and his wife, Julianne, have two grown children and live in Littleton, Colorado.

Rating: 4.25 stars out of 5.

conrade
This book has been provided courtesy of InterVarsity Press via NetGalley without requiring a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.

This is an excellent read. Cusick, a trained psychotherapist and spiritual director has experienced a lot of trauma in his life which led to soothing himself with certain addictive habits. He wondered if he could ever draw close to God and it's through his own personal journey of repentance and learning that he discovers the beauty and joy of sacred attachment to God.

It's a wonderful book as Cusick helps the reader step gently through our own struggles to discover sacred attachment. I especially appreciated Cusick's comments about stopping striving when we slip up rather to step back into the Lord's presence using certain practices that suit our disposition and personality. Nothing can separate us from the love of God we're told in the Bible and our sin, our slip-ups, don't. Allowing ourselves to bathe in divine love, irrespective of how dirty we feel, helps release us from our bondage and turn back to continue following its source: our wonderful triune God.

The book is one that perhaps is best served read slowly and meditatively. There are discussion questions at the back geared towards groups but I do wonder if some of the concepts could be better reflects upon by having questions, points to ponder, or whatever, at the end of each chapter. That way it's more natural for. reader to dive into them rather than flipping to the back of the book.

Like most early ebook versions, the experience of a non-fiction book is a little challenged, and I'm looking forward to getting my hands on a published copy in the New Year.

I feel very blessed having received the early ebook draft from IVP via Net Galley. This has had no bearing on my review and as I mentioned I'm planning on buying my own copy when it releases in 2025.

This is a thoughtful, heartfelt book that will likely help a lot of people. I appreciated Cusick's vulnerability and his compassion. The book posits that tendencies to sin - our tendencies to distrust God and turn to other things for security or satisfaction - stem from past pain. I do not think all sin issues stem from trauma or attachment disorders from childhood, and we are still responsible for our own choices. The book should have made clearer in places that we must repent of sin to be restored to a right relationship with God. However, the book was clear that sin has awful consequences and that we ought to work through past pain with help from God and people. As Cusick states, struggles such as addiction can have multifaceted causes, and just trying harder, reading the Bible more, etc., aren't always solutions. This book offers some strategies (e.g., contemplative prayer) that may be more helpful. Most importantly, Cusick emphasizes God's love for us.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the free eARC. This review will be posted on Goodreads and Amazon closer to publication.

Through his book Sacred Attachment, Cusick could help a lot of people who cannot move on from his traumatic experience and come near to God. With his own story journey of life, I think I can relate a lot with him in this topic.

An interesting examination of attachment styles and how they interact with our connection to God in physical, mystical, and emotional ways.

(I received a free digital copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review)