Messy Perfect is a book that every religious queer kid needs to read. Being queer and growing up religious is such a hard experience.The pressure and guilt that builds up is something that truly makes it feel like it’s not worth the trouble of being true to yourself, like for Cassie. Cassie’s struggles I know all too well. the expectations of being catholic and queer feel so opposite when really they are very similar. Cassie’s struggles and her journey are so beautiful. No one should be required to be perfect all the time and sometimes your priorities in life may change but the people who care about your will always have your back.

Character development is a strength in this novel. I enjoyed the way their internal struggles were portrayed. Very relatable to the struggles of young queer people in many parts of the country.

So I've read both of Tanya Boteju's other books and enjoyed both (Though I'll admit Bruised stuck in my head more than Kings, Queens and In-Betweens) so when I saw she was releasing a book with religious themes as well, I was excited as I eat that up. And for the most part, I feel like this book delivered on what I was looking for!

Messy Perfect follows Cassie Perera, who is the quintessential perfect student at her Catholic high school. Perfect, grades, on the volleyball team and student council, and volunteers for the library. If there is something that needs to be done, you can count on Cassie. Except when her childhood best friend Ben reemerges after being gone for several years, it throws Cassie's equilibrium off. She feels guilty for an event in their past and tries to make it up to Ben by starting an underground GSA at their school. And this opens up Cassie's world in a whole new way.

When I first read the blurb of this book, it kinda reminded me of a newer version of Geography Club by Brent Hartinger, except with a female protagonist and a private school with the concept of a secret GSA. So that drew me in. And I think it compares well. I found the book to be powerful, with rich interesting characters I was emotionally invested in quickly.

I really loved Cassie from the getgo. Girl was pushing herself so hard. I loved her and felt for her. She pushes herself way harder than I did in high school, and my whole read was like "girl don't burn yourself out." She was a really well developed character. You could tell that the reason she takes so much in was as a crutch to get over the emotional struggles she had with her identity and the church. Ben was a cool character too, and I found his plot twist very amusing. I really enjoyed all the GSA characters too and the sides they were able to bring out of Cassie.

And the way the church was handled was interesting to me. I liked that there was a lot of different views displayed from some people wanting to throw it all out, to people not knowing how to reconcile their beliefs, to others who didn't have a problem intertwining both. I don't want tot venture into spoilery territory, but I think it was handled with grace and I enjoyed it.

There is a glaring issue I had while reading the book, and while it wasn't a MAJOR issue for me, it did take me out of the believability range. A lot of the actions the GSA does at St. Timothy's are public displays in the hallways of the school, outside the front doors, or in the library. And there's this big thing of the school not knowing who is behind them, and searching for the perpitraitors. BUT this is 2024 (or 2025 when this book comes out.) I find there to be no way that a an established school doesn't have security cameras in public areas such as the hallways and doors. I know people that work in public and private schools. And while there aren't cameras in classrooms, there are almost always cameras in hallways and outside the building. So this whole plot point seemed really improbable to me. If the setting of the book was set more 10-12 years in the past I could believe this more, but also then a lot of language the students use may have to be updated. I don't know if this issue will bother everyone, but it did me.
And the smallest of things, this book did go out of it's way to show a lot of different identities queer people have but I don't think there were any trans feminine characters at all. I don't know, it is probably unintentional, but when like most other identities were there, it did stand out to me.

All in all, this was a very enjoyable book I think a lot of people, especially young people who grew up in religious environments will enjoy. 4/5