This is *such* a wise and gentle book to share with anyone who’s living with grief and loss. Sure, it’s geared towards kids. But if you have a child who needs it, make sure you read it alongside them, or at least make sure you talk about it with them.

The author’s approach normalizes grief and teaches skills for self-understanding and self-soothing, as well as tools for uncomfortable social situations and caring for the physical manifestations of grief.

I highly recommend this book, and I’m so grateful I read it.

Well-written and clear workbook/guide that walks children and teens through traumatic situations and our varied responses to them. Imperi does a great job teaching us about the grief process, removing stigma or worries about those strong feelings, and offering great ideas and encouragement to keep moving through it. My brother died in my young teen years, and I feel like we just sort of saw our way through it, back to normal life after a few weeks. While this guide could feel a little dense at at times, it does have a good deal of encouragement and wisdom. It includes examples of various types of deathloss or shadowloss from sample children, and explained some of their feelings and experiences, to help various situations seem relatable. While not all children will be dealing with very close or tragic deathloss, I do think we all experience life changes, discouragement and more types of shadowloss that can send us into a puzzling grief cycle. Our oldest recently left home, and it has rocked all our worlds in surprising ways. Imperi offers a great lesson on how we do life, and giving ourselves a little grace as we do so, in a very inclusive and encouraging way.

Read as a nomination in the nonfiction book award category as a panelist for Children's and Young Adult Bloggers' Literary Awards (Cybils Awards).

A middle grade book covers an unfortunately necessary topic, "A Guide to Grief" by Cole Imperi is for children who have lost someone or something and are processing the loss. The book has some illustrations that are black and white and serve as accents to certain prompts. Its reading level and formatting suggest it is for children ages eight and up to use as a guide on their own, although there are caregiver tips at the end. The book's subject matter is broken down into what grief is, definining the deathloss and shadowloss types of grieving, then the remaining chapters are the actual practice and instructions for dealing with grief.

Imperi writes in a matter of fact manner that doesn't talk down to the audience. The constant reiteration that grief is an unique process and there is no wrong way to feel is something I appreciate, it doesn't feel repetitive, it is reaffirming. There are some instances where the frank tone could be softened or modified, such as the part in "what isn't a deathloss," when discussing how children can feel sad and sympathetic when someone they love if grieving. The importance of not taking on someone else's grief is important, and brought up explicitly later in the book, but seems very abrupt when saying that is not actually grief. I think there is a grey area here, especially since I know some very sensitive children whose first time processing loss was because their parent/friend lost someone important to them and their emotions would have fallen into grief by proxy. Children who never met their grandparents, but still knew them via birthday presents and cards and family stories would fall under this category of grieving. The fact that the book acknowledges deathloss for children in parasocial relationships, aka celebrities and people they don't know personally but still feel like there is a profound impact on their life, makes me think there was just a bluntness in that part that came out wrong. It's not factually incorrect, but considering the rest of the book takes great pains to let the child reader feel like their feelings are valid, that one part felt contradictory.

In regards to the rest of the guide, it has a few helpful methods of taking the time to write out or do activities that allow children to process their emotions. This is the most helpful part of the second half of the book, as figuring out the feelings that contribute to grief is often difficult for adults, so imagine how hard it is for children who haven't fully developed a regulatory system for their emotions and may be going through other things such as puberty or other adolescent milestones. The examples of named kids who felt a shadowloss or deathloss was a nice idea, but also very brief that it didn't feel like the personalized connection it wanted to be.

Overall, a humanistic and well thought out book. The first half is a description of grief and relevant details, and the second part is more like a workbook. The overall format is functional but not eyecatching, but a grief workbook doesn't require the visual spreads that other informational books do. For younger children I would suggest "Goodbye : a first conversation about grief" or "Talking about grief : a Sesame Street resource" as those are for a read with caregiver audience, but this is a good and informative resource for middle grade.

Thank you, Kids Can Press, for the ARC.

I feel this book should be available sooner and be more accessible everywhere.

This is one such difficult topic that adults find it uncomfortable to share and discuss but can be very detrimental if done in a seemingly insensitive way without meaning to. But the most important aspect is how to deal with it and how to process the emotions that come with grief.

There are nine main chapters defining grief, how it can make you feel and the complications that come along with. The last two chapters deal with learning on how & most importantly WHAT NOT TO DO or HOW NOT TO “HELP” others through their grief which I feel is the most important one to read and reread until we get it.

There’s a grief journal which will help you to write down what’s on your mind which you feel others will never understand. Also the note to caregivers is a must read.

This book is filled with wisdom and sense which we lack most of the time sadly.

Must read and must have recommendation from my side.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC

It was interesting. Maybe it would have helped me a few years ago, but even now I have realized something for myself. There are pictures here(!). Interesting concept and implementation. I will recommend it.

This book is the wise and compassionate friend you need when you experience grief and loss. Everyone faces loss, and everyone grieves. But grief is as unique as a thumbprint---not everyone grieves the same losses or in the same way. A Guide to Grief covers everything you need to know about death and loss that no one wants to talk about, including: What to expect in the days, months, and years after loss The different kinds of loss How to ask for help How to help a grieving friend Whether you are grieving a deathloss (the death of a loved one), or a shadowloss (the death of something not someone), there are simple exercises and helpful mantras to help you move forward in healthy ways. Grief traditions from different cultures and throughout history remind you that this is a universal experience, and you are not alone. This guide has been sensitively reviewed by experts in the field, and contains writing prompts, helpful resources, a glossary of terms, as well as a guide for caregivers. You are part of a new generation of grievers. So let's start a new way of talking about endings.