this is such a hard but necessary read for someone that is healing an abusive relationship such as myself. it's spot on and I can't thank net galley, the publishers and author for allowing me to read it.

Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths
Stop the Cycle of Manipulation, Exploitation, and Abuse in Your Romantic Relationships
by Shahida Arabi is a great resource to keep as an ebook, on the bookshelf or even given as a gift. It is good for help with a romantic relationship, friendships or family. This is the book that I needed to help me with the relationships with my siblings but I was unable to complete reading through the book as I began to be triggered. I plan to read again once I’ve finished therapy and have the correct skills to complete.

Ok, so we have all those people in our lives that just seem to suck everything out of us. This book is a wonderful toolkit to help us deal with those people & move forward in our lives in a much more positive way.

I believe these topics should be studied in school so that everyone, from a tender age, is made aware of certain relationship dynamics. We usually learn about it when it's too late and a lot of damage has already been done. Very good read.

Very helpful to recognize the harmful traits of certain personalities and when a situation is truly abusive.

I’ve learned some new things. Sometimes I felt like the perspectives were very black and white.

I’ve always been a huge fan of Shahida Arabi’s writing ever since I bought her book called The Highly Sensitive Person’s Guide to dealing with Toxic People. That book saved my life years ago and I’m so glad that book was recommended to me by a friend. Thankfully, after reading Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths, I have changed the way I live and work with some of my narcissistic family members, my romantic partner and coworkers. I used to be very reactive and I used to ruminate over every word they said to me and I would always second guess every interaction I had with them until I read this literary gem and I started to apply some of the life-changing techniques to my own life. I would highly recommend Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths to everyone I know because this book will teach you how to break free from toxic relationships and focus on your own needs and goals and you will find peace and happiness by learning to let go of relationships that don’t bring joy into your life.

This book is an invaluable resource for understanding trauma bonds and narcissistic relationships. What sets it apart is how the author transforms complex neuroscience into accessible insights – no advanced degree required.

The content is thorough yet approachable, covering the science behind trauma bonds (including their impact on neurological development and cognitive function) while maintaining a practical focus. The author strikes an excellent balance between academic research and real-world application.

Key strengths include:
- Clear explanations of relationship dynamics
- Evidence-based strategies for breaking unhealthy patterns
- Practical tools like journaling prompts and self-reflection exercises
- Versatile applications across personal and professional relationships

Worth noting: this isn't just about romantic relationships – the principles apply equally to professional and family dynamics. The author emphasizes that falling into these patterns isn't a character flaw; it's a well-documented phenomenon that affects individuals regardless of their resilience or capability.

For anyone questioning whether their relationships are serving them well, this book offers both insight and actionable steps forward. The encouraging tone and clear structure make it particularly effective as a self-help resource.

BREAKING TRAUMA BONDS WITH NARCISSISTS AND PSYCHOPATHS: STOP THE CYCLE OF MANIPULATION, EXPLOITATION, AND ABUSE IN YOUR ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS.
BY: SHAHIDA ARABI

I read this book not to have anything to do with my marriage which is healthy. My romantic relationship is a blueprint for an example of health. I read this because I have read other books by this Author, Shahida Arabi and love her writing style. This non-fiction book was interesting how she talks about trauma bonds which has a lot to do with neuroscience of the brain and how these trauma bonds are like getting addicted to a drug. I am very fascinated by psychology and I suspect that a couple of people that I know who can benefit from this fantastic Researcher who has written an informative cutting edge explanation that informs why people stay in toxic relationships. I learned so much and it answered a lot of questions for me with her refreshing information about neuroscience. How the different parts of the brain can affect why you might wonder why it's not as easily as just deciding to leave a toxic relationship and it has nothing to do with how strong a person is that determines the ability to why people who get trauma bonded with narcissistic or psychopathic people since their are chemicals released such as hormones and neurotransmitters are released that keep people stuck even when logic tells them they should leave. Since the toxic relationships that people stay in because of the organs in the brain makes it hard to leave since the chemicals in the brain are much like an addiction when manipulative tactics that narcissistic and psychopaths employ could affect anybody no matter how strong they are. She breaks down how and why this terrifying phenomenon takes place with millions of people according to the case studies she presents. This book is a gold mine of information that gives journal prompts and explanations in an empathetic voice, and occurs with extended family, co-workers, people in the medical fields as well. Her message is very comforting to anyone who has a loved one who is a survivor of a relationship with a psychopath or narcissist, which is it's very unlikely that the survivor is exaggerating since research studies cited from survivors back up that correlate that survivors tend to be more accurate reporters of these narcissistic and psychopathic true traits and behaviors and it's not the survivors fault.

Gaslighting: "is a manipulation tactic designed to distort your reality and make you question your perceptions, thoughts and emotions." In this Author's study sample "95% of survivors had experienced gaslighting, and this was true for those who had partners with narcissistic as well as psychopathic traits," (Arabi 2023) Jealousy induction or Triangulation as well as stonewalling are common manipulation tactics that are used by these abusers that strengthens the trauma bond.

This book is a must read for everyone since this is something that happens to someone you know during your lifetime and this book is crucial with so much to offer in terms of a step by step of outstanding research that's easy to understand explaining how it happens, how to break free of it and it can happen to the strongest people and it's not their fault. It's essential to try to break free since it can affect neurons in the brain from growing and affect memory and learning. It's not dense textbook reading which is due to this author's fantastic ability to have managed to make the neuroscience easy to understand for everyone. I'm so grateful to have read it since it is a comprehensive clear compilation that the details and her depictions of making this for everyone is an amazing feat. It sounds academic which it is but this author's amazing writing gifts to make complex aspects easy for non scientific people who read this could help the audience of readers use this as one of the best tools that could just save someone you know who unwittingly is impacted by a trauma bond. Remember it's never the survivor's fault and has affected millions of people who were strong.

Publication Date: February 2, 2025

Thank you to Net Galley, Shahida Arabi and New Harbinger Publications, Inc. for generously providing me with my wonderful ARC. All opinions are my own.

#BreakingTraumaBondswithNarcissistsandPsychopaths #ShahidaArabi #NewHarbingerPublicationsInc #NetGalley

BREAKING TRAUMA BONDS WITH NARCISSISTS AND PSYCHOPATHS: STOP THE CYCLE OF MANIPULATION, EXPLOITATION, AND ABUSE IN YOUR ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS.
BY: SHAHIDA ARABI

I read this book not to have anything to do with my marriage which is healthy. My romantic relationship is a blueprint for an example of health. I read this because I have read other books by this Author, Shahida Arabi and love her writing style. This non-fiction book was interesting how she talks about trauma bonds which has a lot to do with neuroscience of the brain and how these trauma bonds are like getting addicted to a drug. I am very fascinated by psychology and I suspect that a couple of people that I know who can benefit from this fantastic Researcher who has written an informative cutting edge explanation that informs why people stay in toxic relationships. I learned so much and it answered a lot of questions for me with her refreshing information about neuroscience. How the different parts of the brain can affect why you might wonder why it's not as easily as just deciding to leave a toxic relationship and it has nothing to do with how strong a person is that determines the ability to why people who get trauma bonded with narcissistic or psychopathic people since their are chemicals released such as hormones and neurotransmitters are released that keep people stuck even when logic tells them they should leave. Since the toxic relationships that people stay in because of the organs in the brain makes it hard to leave since the chemicals in the brain are much like an addiction when manipulative tactics that narcissistic and psychopaths employ could affect anybody no matter how strong they are. She breaks down how and why this terrifying phenomenon takes place with millions of people according to the case studies she presents. This book is a gold mine of information that gives journal prompts and explanations in an empathetic voice, and occurs with extended family, co-workers, people in the medical fields as well. Her message is very comforting to anyone who has a loved one who is a survivor of a relationship with a psychopath or narcissist, which is it's very unlikely that the survivor is exaggerating since research studies cited from survivors back up that correlate that survivors tend to be more accurate reporters of these narcissistic and psychopathic true traits and behaviors and it's not the survivors fault.

Gaslighting: "is a manipulation tactic designed to distort your reality and make you question your perceptions, thoughts and emotions." In this Author's study sample "95% of survivors had experienced gaslighting, and this was true for those who had partners with narcissistic as well as psychopathic traits," (Arabi 2023) Jealousy induction or Triangulation as well as stonewalling are common manipulation tactics that are used by these abusers that strengthens the trauma bond.

This book is a must read for everyone since this is something that happens to someone you know during your lifetime and this book is crucial with so much to offer in terms of a step by step of outstanding research that's easy to understand explaining how it happens, how to break free of it and it can happen to the strongest people and it's not their fault. It's essential to try to break free since it can affect neurons in the brain from growing and affect memory and learning. It's not dense textbook reading which is due to this author's fantastic ability to have managed to make the neuroscience easy to understand for everyone. I'm so grateful to have read it since it is a comprehensive clear compilation that the details and her depictions of making this for everyone is an amazing feat. It sounds academic which it is but this author's amazing writing gifts to make complex aspects easy for non scientific people who read this could help the audience of readers use this as one of the best tools that could just save someone you know who unwittingly is impacted by a trauma bond. Remember it's never the survivor's fault and has affected millions of people who were strong.

Publication Date: February 1,, 2025

Thank you to Net Galley, Shahida Arabi,, and, New Harbringer Publications,, Inc. for generously provinding me with my wonderful ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own.. I loved this well written book that the author did a fantastic job at makinmg it so comprehensive and interesting.

#BreakingtheTraumaBondswithNarcissistsandPsychopaths #ShahidaArabi #NewHarbingePublicationsInc #NetGalley.

Break free from manipulation and gaslighting-once and for all. This book will help you break trauma with narcissists and psycopaths and have a well e.mind in lif.e

Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths is an easy-to-read book by therapist Shahida Arabi. It’s a helpful guidebook for people who are victims of manipulation, gaslighting, and deception in romantic relationships. The author defines trauma bonds as a powerful connection between abuser and victim based on danger, betrayal, or a power imbalance inherent in the relationship. This book is packed with the tools to break free from the destructive grip of narcissistic or psychopathic abuse. It teaches how to spot manipulation tactics used by abusers and emphasizes drawing healthy boundaries with a partner. It also includes insightful tips and practical strategies for safely ending unhealthy relationships and building healthy relationships in the future.

I recommend this book for adults who suspect they are in an unhealthy relationship. While the case studies are geared towards romantic relationships, the principles can be applied to workplace and family relationships as well. Not only is this book very informative and easy-to understand, but the author also writes in a positive, encouraging and reassuring tone.

I received an Advance Review Copy (ARC) from NetGalley and New Harbinger Publications for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

This book is absolutely a must read if you even possibly suspect you are dealing with someone who is a narcissist or potential psychopath. This book was very clear, it was written in a way that was great for me to manage and understand. There is research based information and you can complete the exercises as part of your own work toward healing after the negative effects of these type of relationships. I believe even if you have not had these types of relationships in your life already, you will know what to identify and how to stay away from it by reading this book.

I’m so glad I picked up this book. It really breaks down trauma bonds in a way that makes sense, explaining how they form and why it’s so hard to break free from them. I always thought trauma bonding meant connecting over shared trauma, but here it’s about the unhealthy, manipulative dynamics that trap you with narcissists.

The thing about this book - I found - was how it really validated it made me feel. It doesn’t just explain toxic behaviors like gaslighting or love bombing—it reminds you that you’re not alone and that you can heal.

If you’ve ever dealt with a narcissist or are trying to move on from toxic relationships, this book is a must-read. It’s practical, insightful, and honestly, it just makes you feel seen.


Thank you NetGalley and New Harbinger Publications

I'm so, so glad I found this book. I've read probably hundreds of self help books in my life, and a lot of titles particularly about surviving narcissistic relationships in the past few years, but this book feels decidedly different in its approach, scope, and content.

One of the most notable insights this book held for me was its focus on the neuroscience behind trauma bonding -- a term I'd previously believed meant "two people brought together by a shared traumatic experience" but in this context means an abusive, manipulative dynamic in which you can become trapped with a narcissistic personality -- and how this impacts your thoughts and behaviors. While I've seen a lot of therapists focus on awareness of one's mindset, this is the first one I've seen actually focus on why those of us currently or formerly trauma bonded to narcissists seem so inescapably vulnerable to tactics like gaslighting, manipulation, love bombing, and stonewalling.

Written in a personalized and direct tone, I deeply appreciated Arabi's approach to the topic from a place of reassurance and deep empathy. While the book touches on many upsetting and potentially triggering topics, the discussion of these patterns is always accompanied by the clarification that you are not alone, that these patterns can happen to anyone, and that change is always possible.

As a person with a lifetime of familial and interpersonal (mostly non-romantic) experience with narcissists, I still got a lot out of this book despite its focus on dating and romantic relationships. The first-person experiences with gaslighting were particularly insightful to me as someone who has often doubted whether I was 'making things up' or was 'the one who was actually the problem' in former toxic, codependent relationships. It was eerie and quite jarring to see how many statements from Arabi's research participants had been said by me verbatim -- only reading them like this really made the pieces slide into place for me.

This book covers such a wide array of elements in relationships with narcissists: identifying what the dynamics are often like, understanding the trauma bond, healing modalities and ways to put the focus back on yourself and your needs, navigating manipulation tactics, and breaking bonds with narcissists for good. Even past its focus on being aware of abusive dynamics and pattern spotting, this book also provides countless journaling prompts, open-ended questions, and opportunities for helpful self-reflection which will be beneficial to many readers.

Whether you are someone who has interfaced with narcissistic personalities in your home, workplace, social circle, or even across the political landscape, reading this book will provide you with a better ability to not only spot narcissistic behaviors but defend yourself against them as well. It also names and defines manipulative strategies and behaviors which the reader may not have had the language to describe before: I benefitted from explanations of tactics like micro-betrayals, dangerous adaptation, malicious envy, mirroring, and intermittent reinforcement.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and New Harbinger for the ARC of this book in exchange for my honest review. I look forward to getting my own physical copy of this book once it is released so that I can use it as a much needed reference!

Arabi does a phenomenal job of distinguishing characteristics between narcissists and psychopaths, providing case studies and examples of the different diagnoses, and empowering readers to recognize and handle both disorders in real life situations. She does a wonderful job of explaining brain chemistry, trauma bonds, and attachments, and she helps readers discover how to disentangle themselves from dangerous relationships with cluster B personality types.

Not only does Arabi provide a wealth of information about narcissism and sociopathy, she also offers tons of modalities and preventative interventions for people who want to heal from or avoid relationships with narcissists and psychopaths. There are so many ideas for how to rebuild self-esteem, set healthy boundaries, learn to assert oneself, and protect oneself from future entanglements with toxic people.

Many thanks to New Harbinger Publications for sending me an e-ARC! As someone who has compiled an entire library on cluster B personality disorders, Arabi's work is something I am proud to add to my shelf. Far from being a doom and gloom read about the negative repercussions of narcissistic abuse, Arabi empowers readers to achieve and maintain liberation in the dating world and beyond.

This book give you the necessary information and knowledge you need to be in the mind of the people unlike others

First, I’d like to extend my gratitude to NetGalley for providing this advance copy.

As a therapist with over a decade of experience working with individuals navigating trauma, and as someone with lived experience, Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths by Shahida Arabi is a profoundly insightful and practical resource that I cannot recommend enough.

Arabi's work is a beacon of hope and clarity for those entangled in toxic cycles with manipulative individuals. She masterfully breaks down the psychology of trauma bonding, helping readers understand how these bonds form and why they are so difficult to sever. The book strikes an impressive balance between being deeply empathetic and highly informative, creating a safe space for readers to explore their pain while also equipping them with tools to reclaim their power.

What makes this book stand out is its practical focus. Arabi provides actionable strategies for recognizing red flags, strengthening personal boundaries, and fostering emotional resilience. These tools are presented in a way that is accessible to anyone, regardless of where they are in their healing journey.

From a therapist's perspective, this book serves as an excellent adjunct to therapeutic work. It fosters insight, encourages self-compassion, and empowers clients to take an active role in their recovery. For those with lived experience, it feels like sitting down with a wise, compassionate friend who has been through the fire and emerged stronger.

Arabi’s compassionate tone and evidence-based approach make this book an eye-opening guide for anyone seeking freedom from harmful relationships. It is not just a survival manual—it’s a roadmap to thriving. Whether you're a professional supporting clients or someone breaking free from toxic dynamics, this book is an invaluable resource.

"Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths" is an informative book designed to help those who have encountered a narcissist or psychopath in their lives. This book delves into the backgrounds and reasonings on why people behave this way while still putting the responsibility of their harmful actions back on the aggressors. It gives you examples on how to identify if you are indeed being affected by someone with these traits or diagnoses. Also, there are instructions on how you can protect yourself from the attacks. This information is great for everyone!

Thank you NetGalley for this arc!

This book provides clinical background to explain why and how narcissists and psychopaths operate. It is well-researched and referenced, and also provides typical behaviors and techniques used towards the victim. The author also provides methods to help break the trauma bond and break free from the narcissist. Some of the background information can be a bit dry, but it is all very helpful information. The book really hits its stride while explaining the means of creating and breaking the trauma bond.

This is an excellent book. It is well laid out. It clearly explains trauma bonds via biology and psychology. How bonds are formed and breaking them. It gives a clear understanding of how to identify narcissist and psychopaths. The book provides a takeaway section at the end of the chapter that summarizes the main points. The book also has exercises that help calm your system and help break the bonds that have previously been formed. As a therapist, I feel that this book could help a lot of my clients! Well written and easy to understand. I highly recommend this book.

Great book on trauma bonding as well. Breaking trauma bonds with narcissists and psychopaths involves recognizing the manipulative nature of the relationship and taking steps to regain control over your life. The trauma bond is a powerful psychological attachment that develops through cycles of abuse and manipulation, leading to a sense of dependence and fear of leaving the relationship.