This was a very interesting book about family relationships and how things can change. The Girl named MA on I.A.N r I see m o n d had a medical problem and her mother could not seem to take care of this. The mother also had past trauma as well.And she was dealing with that as a best she could. When the girl was nine years old , she had a seizure and nobody knew what her. Her mother took her to a Chiropractor and put it on a strict diet. And vitamins. This did not help and she suffered greatly. She was trying to live a normal life. And it was really hard for her.. When she was in middle school she seized her was so bad they sent her home.
As she got older it was hotter for her especially when she went to college. She had Attack at college and found out she had epileps. Her life became somewhat normal but she still struggled all the time Her mother finally reeled her. What happened to her in the 50s when she was in the Air Force? Mother also came down with DEM ENT I.A.
And this was really interesting how the daughter helped her out as well. You can see how illnesses run in this family ment end and physical. There's a great book

Author Marianne Richmond had a traumatic childhood. The first seizure onsets at age 9 and her parents are not equipped to help her. Her mother deems them to be "spasms" and can easily be treated with the right, alternative medicine. When she's 18 and has another large seizure, she finds out she indeed has epilepsy and that she even has a growth in her brain. With a caring person by her side, Marianne decides it's time to claim her life and reconnect with herself. The book is told in 3 parts, the first being her childhood, the second her adulthood, the third her healing. There are threads of religions (specifically a Christian God) and what it means to be faithful woven throughout her story. Overall I found this an interesting read, and also found that even with my own mother wounds, I could read this without issue. This could be a good start for some readers who realize they have a mother wound.

IF YOU WERE MY DAUGHTER by Marianne Richmond was a heartbreaking read in all the best ways -- about a child given short shrift and very little support through a traumatizing and baffling journey to identifying her epilepsy and moving into her own adult life. While I have not experienced the profound challenges faced by inadequate, imperfect family dynamics, I can relate to the difficulties of mothering when you have not been mothered yourself, having to make it up as you go along, doing the best you can while knowing it's nowhere near enough. A moving read. I received a copy of this book and these opinions are my own, unbiased thoughts.

Marianne Richmond is plagued by unexplained seizures from when she was a young girl until she finally gets a proper diagnosis at age 18. Throughout it all, Marianne’s mother doesn’t give her daughter the emotional support she needs. This thread continues into her adult life when marriage, children and a successful career prove they are not enough to overcome that lack of mothering. Her search for answers leads to healing.

Thank you to NetGalley, SourceBooks and Marianne Richmond for the opportunity to read an ARC of her soon to be released memoir If You Were My Daughter: a Memoir of Healing an Unmothered Heart. The author is a celebrated writer of children's books, however this was my first encounter with her. In many ways I thoroughly enjoyed the book: Richmond's clarity, her ability to fully engage the reader; at times I felt like I was in the doctor's office with her and her mom, Mary or in the school lavatory when she was fighting her body's apparent betrayal and praying for it to pass. And at times her use of words moved me to tears. I struggled with what I perceived as constant negativity toward her mother, while seemingly holding her milquetoast dad free from blame/ responsibility. Was Richmond' s family dysfunctional? Yes. Was her mom cold? Yes. Mary Helf, Marianne's mom, was a devout Catholic, had a miltary background, was in a less than perfect marriage and definitely had serious mental issues..I could go on and on about my reactions to the book; suffice to say they are mixed. I am, however, confident it was written from the heart, Richmond was brutally candid about her life and her journey to perhaps not total forgiveness, yet definitely more understanding, spiritual awareness and reconciliation. I believe If You Were My Daughter is a very relatable book, and would be an ideal read for a book club. 4 stars.

A book recommended for me after reading She Danced With Lightning. Was able to download this book from #NetGalley in exchanged for my review. Pub day for this book is March 18. Marianne Richmond is a prolific children’s book author, will be checking out as many of her books from the library as they have available.

Synopsis: If You Were My Daughter is a story of learning to hear your own voice, of one daughter's return to wholeness, and ultimately, a story of accepting that, despite all hope and longing, a mother's "best I could" can still fall far too short.

Review: This book was recommended for me since there is an Epilepsy undertone throughout. Marianne starts having seizures in elementary school, but is not diagnosed with Epilepsy until she is an adult. Marianne realizes she has Epilepsy when a boy who has a seizure one day and there is a discussion of seizure safety in class. At its core If You Were My Daughter, is a mother daughter relationship that Marianne feels is lacking, she feels less than, and especially neglected with her medical issues. There are so many threads to tease out of this book, some parrels to A Mind Unraveled by Kurt Eichewald in the medical realm. My hope is a friend will read this book, and we can get together and chat. My rating 4.25/5.

Thank you to Netgalley, Sourcebooks, and the author for the ARC of this memoir. All opinions are my own.

I did not expect to be so triggered by a memoir. I often gravitate towards books like this - complex relationships with parents - to see if others have gone through a similar upbringing and it usually brings me peace. Not this book.

We follow Marianne through childhood, through disability where no one listens to her, through her adult life where her parents fail her time and time again. The rage this made me feel for this sweet child turned adult, all alone in the world. And the love (maybe?) that she still has towards her parents despite it all.

Marianne is a stronger person than I could ever be. Despite my personal feelings towards her continued relationship with her parents through end of life, I am really glad I read this. I hope she is now the person she needed for her children, but my guess is yes.

Love to see when someone can take their very shitty situation (at no fault of their own) and still have a beautiful life.

This memoir chronicles the author’s journey through a life shaped by her mother's inability to care for her, leading to years without the proper diagnosis and treatment for her recurring seizures. As the author becomes a mother herself, the narrative explores how her own experiences with motherhood are impacted by her past. The story deeply resonated with me, prompting reflection on my own relationship with my mother. I found myself relating to the author’s emotional journey in coming to terms with her upbringing and the emotional journey of dealing with aging parents. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this advanced reader’s copy.

A memoir of how her mother's emotional neglect affected her life, and how she made peace with this. An exploration of faith, daughterhood, and motherhood.

A little trite at times (more so in the poetry pieces, I just have a different personal preference with poetry, I think), but having so many parallels from relationships in my own life made it relatable for me. I loved witnessing my own difficult relationship mirrored in this other person and put so eloquently at times. I have several highlighted sections that all fall in line with this as areas that made me feel seen, connected, or realized. The idea of "growing the pause" is something that stuck with me after reading it.
I do think the title gave me different expectations for the book itself, (I went in blind, only based on title/cover).

It was an interesting storyline on the whole, and I do have a friend I'll be recommending it to.

Not sure if this is helpful/needed, but there were typos at locations:
396: An instead of And
1485: added comma in "we'll always love each, other"
1783: "Mom and sit at..." Mom and I sit at...
2180: "What will do when you run out..." What will you do when you run out...
2212: Secrets should be singular Secret
2563: "May you sense you loved one's..." May you sense your loved one's...
3004: "an poignant" a poignant

This is a memoir and I hesitate to judge someone else’s lived experience. Marianne Richmond is a supremely talented artist and author and I have many fond memories of sharing her books with my own children. Her life was not without trauma however. Living with undiagnosed epilepsy caused by a slow growing brain tumor until her 20s caused a lot of uncertainty and fear. Her relationship with her parents, but especially her mom was difficult. Throughout her life she longed and pleaded for acceptance and support her mom simply could not give. This was a strong theme throughout the book and definitely contributed to my overall impression that this was a very depressing book. I admire that Marianne was able to become the parent to her children that she wished she had but overall this is a heavy, sad and rather dark glimpse at her life.