4.5 stars.

First Love Language by Stefany Valentine is a delightful young adult romance.

Catie Carlson and her stepsister Mavis are not at all happy they are moving from San Diego to Utah. Catie is still trying to honor the promise she made to her dad before he passed away. Mavis is dreading living in her Later Day Saint aunt’s strict household which will force them into attending the LDS church. While hoping their move will be temporary, Catie and Mavis discover life in Utah is not all bad.

After losing her father, Catie longs to rekindle her relationship with her biological mom, Ya-Fang Linn. Her parents met and married in Taiwan, but Ya-Fang remained there after her divorce from Catie’s dad. Catie would like to know more about her maternal side of her family, but she is loathe to ask her stepmom for assistance. Catie's new job in Utah provides an unexpected opportunity to learn Mandarin in exchange for giving her co-worker Toby dating lessons.

First Love Language is a captivating young adult romance with socially relevant themes. Catie is a wonderful young woman who feels a loss of connection to her culture and extended family. Toby is a great young man who is patient and kind. Catie’s dating lessons incorporate the five love languages and their “practice” dates are so sweet. The LDS church’s stance on LGBTQ+ members of their community also plays an important role in a secondary storyline. Despite an inevitable conflict between Catie and Toby, Stefany Valentine brings this joyful young adult romance to an immensely satisfying conclusion.

I received a free eARC of this novel from the publisher in exchange for this honest review.

I really enjoyed First Love Language by Stefany Valentine. It was refreshing to read a YA contemporary romance that gives a first-person account of what it is like to be a biracially adopted child struggling to find your identity after losing touch with your culture from your birth country. Catie Carlson has lost her white dad from cancer and is faced with moving to Utah from San Diego the summer before her senior year with her stepmom, Andrea, and stepsister, Mavis. The upheaval brings to the fore the missed opportunities she had to question her dad before he died about why he and her Taiwanese birth mom divorced and why he brought Catie to the U.S. afterwards, causing her to lose touch with her birth mom. Not only that, but the move means living with her stepmom's very conservative Mormon sister and her family. But things begin to look up for Catie when she finds a summer job at a successful Korean spa and beauty salon. It seems that when Catie lies to a customer there about having a boyfriend to stop him from hitting on her, Catie's co-worker, Toby, concocts a plan to have Catie coach him on dating if he will help her re-learn Mandarin, Catie's original language. Using a book on Love Languages that her dad gave her before he died, Catie begins putting together a series of practice dates for her and Toby to go on. From there their friendship soon starts to blossom and Catie's quest of self-discovery on so many levels begins.

I loved so many things about this journey that we go on with Catie. At first, her pretending to be an expert on dating advice is amusing and begins a very sweet and tender friendship between her and Toby that eventually becomes a foray into first love. In relearning her first language, Catie also learns to open up to Toby about things she hasn't ever felt she could discuss with her adoptive family since losing her dad. Even before her dad got sick, Catie had trouble finding the courage to ask him so many of the questions about what happened between him and her birth mom, about why her birth mom agreed to give her up. We also see firsthand the racial bigotry and negative stereotyping that Catie has endured growing up in the U.S. that are sometimes intentional and sometimes not, but still annoying and painful. Other themes that are explored in this novel are ones about reconciling one's religious upbringing with one's own identity if you are not white or straight. In Catie's case, her dad and stepmom were both raised in the Mormon faith, but stepped back from the faith when Mavis, Catie's stepsister, identified as being pan sexual as a young teen. Being with Catie's aunt and uncle, who are both strict Mormons is a hard adjustment for both Catie and Mavis for different reasons and the author does not shy away from portraying how hurtful and confusing it can be to be told that God only accepts those who fit a very narrow and restrictive mold for Christianity. In the midst of being forced to attend church with her stepmom's family, in return for being able to move in with them, a door opens for Catie, though and she does find unexpected support and acceptance from a woman of the church who works in the genealogy office. There she helps Catie search for answers to what became of her birth mom and for how Catie can reconnect with her Taiwanese roots.

While this is at heart a YA romance, I think that the many themes explored in this book make it so much richer than that. It is also told in a very realistic and relatable way that I think many YA readers who might have similar things they are coming to terms with will find representative, whether it be searching for answers as an adopted child, dealing with cultural bias as an Asian American, or facing bigotry and intolerance for identifying as part of the LGBTQ+ community. In her author's note at the end Valentine admits that this book was loosely based on her own experiences as a biracial adoptee and that her hope is that anyone reading this book will feel seen in some way in it. If you love contemporary YA romance and can appreciate one that is quiet and sweet while also complex and heartfelt in terms of other things it explores, I highly recommend First Love Language.

I received an ARC from the publisher in exchange for an honest review

First Love Language by Stefany Valentine is a first person-POV YA contemporary romance. When Taiwanese-American Catie moves with her stepmom, Andrea, and stepsister, Mavis, from San Diego to Utah to live with Andrea’s strict Mormon sister and her family, all she can think about is finding a way back to California. While looking for a job for the summer, she finds a beauty salon run by a Blasian family and meets their son, Toby, who offers to teach her Mandarin in exchange for Catie teaching him how to be more confident in romance so he can impress his crush.

The themes here are what really push the book forward. One of the biggest themes is the loss of culture, language, and identity and the biracial American experience. Catie’s father was a white American while her mother was from Taiwan. The couple met, got married, had Catie, and got divorced in Taiwan and when they got divorced, Catie’s father got her in the divorce and she never saw her mother again. After arriving in America, she had to learn English and lost her Mandarin and most of her connections to half of her identity and developed PTSD as a result of how she was treated when she was learning a whole new language. Toby is incredibly understanding of her experiences and helps her put a name to some of her feelings. Catie feels some jealousy towards Toby early on because he has connections to his Korean, Chinese, and Black heritage while she’s still struggling to find a way to even get in contact with her mother.

Another big theme is religion, particularly in relation to Mormon Christianity. We see Catie going to a genealogy center instead of going to church as she has no interest in going back to the faith after the death of her father, the aunt and uncle seems to really embody some of the less tolerant parts of the teachings (such as being anti-Queer and freaking out about Mavis and Catie sitting in a room with a candle lit and thinking they were performing witchcraft), and how you can be of a faith and not believe in everything that you’re taught. Catie’s cousin, Raleigh, served as a wonderful contrast to her parents in terms of being open-minded while also declaring herself to be Mormon and wanting to be part of the community she has. I have spoken to several Queer kids who were raised Mormon and I think they would see themselves in Mavis’ character arc.

The romance between Catie and Toby starts off on a very shaky foot. Toby accidentally ruins her clothes with hair dye and Catie later lies about having a boyfriend to get a creep to leave her alone and doesn’t admit to Toby that she is single in an effort to convince him that she knows what she’s talking about when it comes to love. Their relationship feels more quiet and an appreciation for who they are as well as each other’s artistry. Catie is really into make-up while Toby is a cosmetologist, giving them compatible interests as artists, and Toby is also a really good cook, another kind of art. Not every romance needs to be big and explosive and full of passionate arguments; quiet romances are just as important and I really liked how it was done here.
Content warning for slut shaming language and Queerphobia

I would recommend this to fans of YA romances who love strong themes of identity and those looking for a quieter romance between Asian leads

I absolutely loved this book. Recommended for those that loved To all boys I loved before and XO Kitty. Caties along with her Stepmom and stepsister move to Utah to live her Mormon aunt. . Catie feels disconnected from the world after dad died cancer two years before. Feeling like she lost part of herself and her connection with her culture.
While she’s in Utah she starts working for a Korean family and befriends Toby. Toby wants to learn how to date and after overhearing a lie from Catie decides she’s the best to help him. She’ll teach him love languages while he tutors her in mandarin.

Focusing on identity in culture grief and LGBTQ identity First love Language helps bring together that forming community can help embrace your identity. I found the book heartwarming and honest and just a good time overall.

This is a very cute, emotional little novel about finding yourself amidst the chaos. Super easy to read. While I did find the pacing to be off at times, I found the ending to be fulfilling. The characters feel real (who hasn't frozen up when confronted by a crush before?), absolutely lovable, and deserve all the good things.

This is a beautifully-written love story that has themes of grief, adoption into a family of a different race, and the yearning to learn more about one's biological parents. Not only was the heritage part of this story amazing, the romance had me kicking and giggling my feet. Catie and Toby are truly so cutie!

Stefany captured the displaced feelings so well as an Asian who moved from somewhere diverse to somewhere... not. Like Catie, Valentine is also a Taiwanese American who was adopted into a non-Asian family, and she's channeled her own journey of self-discovery into this story....Stefany has based a lot of this book off her own experience and it really shows throughout the book.

This is an inspirational read about embracing culture, heritage, language, and sexual orientation. alongside a heartwarming young adult romance. This book has positive messages about second chances, resilience, and blooming where you are planted. I thoroughly enjoyed it and would highly recommend it.

This is such a beautiful story about love, self-discovery, and blending different aspects of life to create a complex person.

Catie is a biracial girl who lost her connection to her Taiwanese heritage, and when she moves to Utah with her adoptive mom after her dad's death, she's left feeling unmoored. She goes on an introspective journey to connect to her first language through the boy she works with while coaching him on dating.

There were so many elements to this I loved - especially deconstructing from religious beliefs and exploring more of heritage (MC) and queerness (SC), and it's so cool that it's loosely based on the author's life. This is a sweet romance too, with all the practice dates.

Thank you to NetGalley and publisher for the opportunity to read and review.

I really enjoyed the message that this book had! I feel like it represented a lot of different topics, which I appreciated. Catie and Toby were fun to watch interact. I kind of wish it was a little longer, I still wanted to see what happened. Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin for this ARC!

First Love Language is a search for belonging. After the FMC moves to Utah, she and her family are seeking community in the summertime, and it can be tough to push past insecurity and loneliness to find people who truly get you. The main romance is full of the miscommunication and confusion of young love, but the chemistry and anticipation are great. Side characters explore what it means to be queer in Utah, and the main character researches her family history using the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints’ resources. Readers will get hooked by the romance and then receive unique perspectives on adoption, inclusion, LGBTQIA+ issues, and conservative households. The modern take on Chapman’s Five Love Languages is creative, and the love story is just right for YA romance readers.

This was a fun, quick read. Valentine created a compelling narrative, believable conflict, and characters with hearts of gold.

In the book, Catie struggles to understand her identity after the death of her family. Living with her stepmom and stepsister, she wants to know more about her birth mother, who remained in Taiwan when her father left with young Catie. Even as she tries to explore her Taiwanese family, her American family is uprooted, her stepmom moving them from California to Utah due to a job loss. The family moves in with their strict, Mormon cousins, and both Catie and her sister Mavis feel stifled there. Catie finds an outlet with a job, and soon discovers her coworker Toby can help her connect to her heritage, while he asks Catie for dating lessons.

The book did a good job examining heritage and how it shapes our identities, as well as creating realistic teen characters struggling with the heightened emotions and longing for acceptance so typical to the teenage experience. While Mavis and the stepmom are not as developed of characters, Catie is the main focus of the story and goes on quite a journey throughout the pages. I found her relatable, sympathetic, and interesting in her mistakes and her attempts to fix her mistakes and repair her relationships. Her chemistry with Toby was fun, and his storyline was also realistic and compelling.

Overall, I was impressed by how a light, teen rom-com dealt with heavy issues like grief, identity, family, and transracial adoption without becoming overly saccharine or preachy. This was a fun book I will put in my classroom library!

in a word, cute. a very adorable romance between two realistic and fun protags. would recommend. 4 stars. tysm for the arc.

What a special book!

I love how everyone in this story is [both consciously and subconsciously] on a personal journey to find out what it means to be true to themselves:
-as an adoptee
-as an ethnic minority / biracial person
-as a struggling mom
-as someone navigating sexual identity
-as someone whose religious beliefs are different from the authority figures they live with
-as someone who is grieving
-as someone who has just moved to a new city
-and—for our main character Catie—as someone who starts falling in love for the first time not only with someone else (*cough*Toby*cough*), but with every aspect of who she is, including her heritage <3

Even though I’m not adopted, as an Asian American who spent a lot of my formative years in predominantly white spaces I resonate with a lot of what Catie is going through.

Also, I LOVE the theme of language throughout this story, which is reflected even in the chapter titles. So beautiful.

And can we take a moment to appreciate this cover???

Looking forward to more from Stefany Valentine!

This was very cute, it felt like two very distinct stories, a bit if a romance and a bit of a soul search, but I think they tied together nicely for a YA book. Teens will feel the emotional punches on both sides.

I personally loved the rep of transracial adoption. Every adoption is different and I hope we get to see more and more stories like this.

This was a really enjoyable rom-com that caught my eye because it also touched on a lot of different topics - transracial adoption, languages, and identity conflicting with religious expectations. Like most rom-coms, the very premise required an absolute breakdown in communication and the plot never would have happened if the main character had just spoken up at the right moment. I liked that the teenaged main character's growth as a person was given just as much time as the romance plotline. I wished that we'd gotten a little more description of the notes that the main character's dad left in the book he left behind for her. It started off that way, giving insight into the relationship they'd had and the type of person her late father was, but there wasn't much more of that shown after the initial scene where she finds the book.

Thanks to Netgalley for a copy of this book.

As a young middle schooler, I would have loved this book and I love it as an adult. The characters seem so real I could imagine being friends with them. The plot is utterly charming and happy endings are just what I need. Ms Valentine has tastefully but truthfully depicted stressful situations involving adoption, family, sexuality and loss at a young age.

I thank #netgalley, the publisher and author for this ebook to read. All opinions are my own.

What a fun book! If you're looking for a cute YA romance, this it! I loved the incorporation of love languages and linguistic languages in this story. Catie goes on a typical journey of self-discovery in this book, but you never get bored reading it or think it's exactly like something else you've read before. While I am not adopted and was born in the US, I think this book could be really important for someone who does identify with being adopted or born outside the US. Thank you for writing this book, Stefany!

This was so well written with the genres and blended them well together to tell the story. I enjoyed the overall concept and how the characters felt like real people. I was invested in what Stefany Valentine wrote and enjoyed the young adult element to this book.

This book had me hooked but also left me feeling a bit conflicted. On one hand, it’s got that breezy YA romcom vibe—think The Summer I Turned Pretty or The Kissing Booth—and it nails that playful energy. But at the same time, it’s trying to tackle some seriously deep topics like identity, family, grief, religion, and transracial adoption. Both parts are done well, but the shifts between them felt a bit jarring.

Catie Carlson is an adoptee figuring out where she fits, especially after her dad passes, leaving her feeling disconnected from her white stepfamily. Things get more interesting when she teams up with Toby—a Korean-Black teen who needs dating help. She agrees to coach him while he teaches her Mandarin. Their dynamic is cute and funny, and the romance had all the right romcom feels. But then, the book dives into some heavy emotional stuff, and that’s where things felt a little out of sync for me. It’s like two different stories in one—both good, but maybe not meant to be mashed together in the same book.

That said, I really appreciated the exploration of identity and belonging. It’s not often you see a book take on topics like grief and adoption with such care. But when the romcom moments popped up in the middle of that? It kind of threw me off. I wanted to enjoy the fun, flirty parts, but I was still processing the deeper themes.

If you’re into a mix of playful romance with emotional depth, this one’s worth checking out. Just be ready for some tonal whiplash along the way.

Thank you so much to the publishers and to Stefani for the beautiful e-arc of this book. Once I started reading, it was so hard to put this book down😶🙏 full review will be up by next week.

A cute little novel and peek into the Mormon church and how things can bring different people together.