Recent and reluctant college drop-out Thomas Walsh is afraid that the rest of his life will just be taking odd jobs and scraping by just to make ends meet. Since the death of his father, he's been the one looking out for his chronically ill and Deaf mother and his younger sister. So when he gets a job offer from a wealthy family to serve as the interpreter and somewhat handler of Vivienne Farrow, a selective mute and girl with a lot of secrets, he can't say no. He gets drawn into Viv's dark and mysterious world, and moreover, into Viv herself. Viv is hiding demons of her own: when she was only four, she was lost in the desert for two days, and when she came back out, she wasn't alone anymore. Her reflection, her voice, aren't her own anymore, and in fact, can kill. Thankfully, she's found a man willing to perform a surgical exorcism, to cut this evil out of her physically. However, there are worse things out there, and as Thomas and Viv develop a relationship, things only grow more complicated.
What a stellar gothic/horror romance. The tension. The messy characters. I love how sharp they both are, just brutal edges and barbs. The magic (?) was interesting, and the dramatic developments were fantastic. This story was one I hurried through, to try and see what new bends would come. Also, if that's not enough to convince you, there's also good dogs who survive the book happily.

All the books I've been reading lately seem to have an unfortunate theme: they leave me utterly confused. I Am Made of Death was no different. Don't get me wrong. The atmosphere was exceptionally well done and there was a creepiness that permeated the whole book. I enjoyed that aspect of the story and found the author's writing very easy to read. The plot was gripping, and I didn't want to stop once I started reading.

However.

What was actually going on here? This is a genuine question because I have no idea. It really felt like a bunch of ideas were just thrown together. Significant bits and pieces of information would come out of nowhere and smack me across the face, angry that I hadn't known about them the whole time. More than half of the backstory doesn't come until after the book's halfway point. By then, I was invested, but I wish a lot of that information had come sooner, as it would have made many plot points make way more sense.

The characters were decent. Again, if the backstory had come sooner, I think they would have been more interesting, but because we don't know anything for a significant period of time, it's hard to relate to them. They were bland, for lack of a better word. Also, where did all of those random characters come from? Thomas's friends had absolutely no context, and his background was even more confusing than Vivienne's, and she carried around a creepy monster thing inside her. It didn't make any sense. Also, the romance felt ... weird? I don't know if that's the right word, but it was very out of the blue. Not that I didn't see it coming, of course, but it felt like there was no actual development, and then they loved each other. It was very quick.

In all, I Am Made of Death was confusing. It was very atmospheric and still a decent read, but confusing nonetheless. If you can look past that, however, I think you will really enjoy this book.

I received an advanced copy of I Am Made of Death from Netgalley and the publisher and am leaving this review voluntarily.

“I Am Made of Death” by Kelly Andrew is a dark and atmospheric blend of horror and romance, following Vivienne Farrow, a young woman with a deadly voice, and Thomas Walsh, the interpreter thrown into her dangerous world. The concept itself was intriguing—filled with eerie imagery, sinister forces, and a romance that had moments of real tenderness.

However, the pacing didn’t quite work for me. The beginning dragged on, making it hard to stay engaged, and then the last two parts felt rushed and jumbled together, almost like too much was crammed in too quickly. And then there were the unanswered questions—so many of them! The ending, especially, left things way too open-ended for my taste. I like my books wrapped up with a bow or at least a hint at what the future holds for the characters, and this one just didn’t give me that satisfaction.

That said, I’m proud of myself for sticking through to the end because I am not a horror girly. The creepy elements were definitely unsettling, and I can see why horror fans might appreciate the ambiguity. But for me, the lack of resolution made it hard to fully enjoy. Overall, the book had an interesting premise, but there were just too many loose threads for my liking.

Vivienne doesn’t speak a word. Her mother says it’s by choice. It doesn’t matter why, Vivienne needs someone with her to translate sign language. Hunter is hired to follow Vivienne around and be her keeper. The pay and benefits are excellent and he needs the work to help with finances at home. It is obvious why she wouldn’t want him around or is it? They must navigate a lot of twists and turns to finally uncover all of the secrets and lies in her house. Can they build a relationship while dealing with so many issues?

Vivienne had a traumatic childhood experience that left her mostly mute. The author slowly reveals the background and the consequences of the event. She has created her own sign language so it can be difficult for others to understand her. She lives on edge all the time because of her stepfather and her mother. I won’t explain why here but Vivienne is a pawn in a very nasty game and her being mute is a necessity not a game to her. Thomas grew up speaking sign language and he needs this job because his mother is sick. Vivienne’s stepdad takes advantage of Thomas’ desperation and draws him into the game that he is playing with Vivienne. Thomas develops feelings for Vivienne not because she is the sad little mute girl but because he sees just how strong she has to be to survive every day. They spend a lot of time together and their relationship makes sense.

This book has a lot of BIG ideas. I liked the set up and slow reveal of Vivienne’s life. The author decided to go in a direction I didn’t expect. That was where the book lost me a bit. The organization and their rituals and secrets were a bit much. I feel like that was the original idea and then the story of Vivienne and Hunter was added on. In other words, it almost felt like two books. In the end, the bad guys got what was coming to them and the mystery was solved. That’s not a spoiler. This isn’t the sort of book to leave that hanging unfinished.

This is a contemporary story with supernatural elements. The two main characters are young and struggling to figure out their lives. There are going to be lots of people that will love this book. I am not one of them. I think it is well written but the final story didn’t appeal to me. I might read more from this author in the future.

Thank you to NetGalley and Scholastic Press for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I’m really torn on how to rate this one. I enjoyed reading it, I wanted to pick it up, I stayed up late to see how it would end. But on the other end the whole thing just feels unfinished. The rules of magic are muddy and never really explained adequately. The climax was mostly confusing and I had a tough time figuring out how things were actually wrapped up. Part three left me a bit confused and the sudden influx of new characters past the midway point was too much for me. So there were some really great pieces and beautiful descriptions and great little callback moments but the general feeling I’m left with is that the final product is just a bit messy with too many unfinished edges. Am I glad I read it? Yes. Would I recommend it to others? Not in a blanket recommendation but maybe to very specific friends whose book tastes I know really well.

I'm always going to love a Kelly Andrew book apparently. This was once again like diet Ninth House: there are demons, demon-worshipping cults, possessed folks, and a bunch of young adults trying to figure out how they can magic their way out of things. I also love how Andrew keeps involving her past MCs; it feels like we're building a Scooby gang so they can start going on adventures all together at some point in what is technically a series at this point (all the books are really interconnected standalone but we're getting to a point that you DO need info from past books for some things to make sense).

I really enjoyed the romance in this one as well. Vivienne was cruel and spitting like a threatened animal trying to ward off predators and Thomas was only soft for her. He went around bashing people's heads in at the slightest provocation (see: someone saying something even slightly negative towards or about his girly). It was giving enemies to lovers or maybe more like annoyances to lovers and to be honest kind offfff bodyguard romance though that is not the job Thomas technically has here.

I also always appreciate Andrew's differently abled characters and that even though, in this instance, her being mute was due to her possession, after her demon was exorcised, she didn't immediately go back to speaking instead of signing.

I would recommend these books to everyone but especially anyone that loves something a little dark and spooky like Ninth House!

Thank you to the NetGalley and the publisher for my ARC!

I Am Made of Death is Kelly Andrew's best book to date. She expresses it best in her introduction by stating " I like to tell people that 'The Whispering Dark' is the book of my head and 'Your Blood, My Bones' is the book of my heart. By that metric, 'I Am Made of Death' is the book of my soul,'" and what a book it is! When Philip is recruited to become a rich man's sign translator for his mute teenage daughter, Vivienne, he quickly learns the job involves far more than helping her communicate. Vivienne holds many secrets, not the least of which is the demonic being that has taken up residence inside her. While the "Bubblegum" aesthetic differs greatly from the rustic setting of Your Blood, My Bones, the intensity of the story is not to be taken lightly. The monsters in this book are both real and terrifying! The second act particularly had me on the edge of my seat in a cinematic way I have rarely experienced in YA horror (or any horror for that matter).

The romance in this book is also well done, though I would argue it is not central to the plot. Rather, the trust built between Philip and Vivienne makes sense and is founded on his ability to see Vivienne as human and treat her so, in contrast to many of the other characters in her life who see her as a tool, a freak, or a monster. Andrews also excels in her disability representation here, as in her other books. The connection between disability and body horror is longstanding, but rarely have I seen it delivered with such nuance and impact.

Easily a five star read, I would only caution that the book is not a complete standalone and may confuse readers who have not yet read Andrews other books, specifically the Whispering Dark. In the third act (where much is explained) we do see some crossover characters from her earlier books, and the way the demonic universe works is rooted in the universe she has previously established. As a result, some of the action in the last act felt a little rushed and could easily be confusing or incomplete without this knowledge. I did not know this was the same world going in and remembered little from Whispering Dark's details. I would highly recommend reading Whispering Dark first if you have not in order to more easily make these connections and avoid this confusion. Even so, the characterization, stakes and overall delivery of this story is fantastic! I read this one a few weeks ago and I am still thinking about it!

Like everything else in her series, I loved it. I literally took months off after reading the first half because I didn't want it to end, and then I finished it right before release day. Lovely.

It's hard to put this book into any one category. Suspense? Romance? Spiritual drama? Mystery? In that sense, it's definitely an intriguing read with twists and turns to keep the reader engaged. Basically, Thomas knows sign language and it's this skill that gets him a job as an interpreter for a teen girl not that much younger than himself. Vivienne is selectively mute and keeps getting into trouble. Something is definitely up in her household - Vivienne's dad is super rich and manipulative, her mom kind of cowers in the background, and they're all hiding some crazy secret. Thomas is also expected to live in their home while working for them.

Something happened to Vivienne when she was just 4 years old that changed her forever and Thomas is bound to find out. Vivienne is hiding other secrets too. Everything escalates into absolute chaos at the end of the book - complete with family secrets bursting forth and hidden siblings coming out of the woodwork. A dark, twisty spiritual mystery with some random romance thrown in.

As I am sitting here after finishing this book I feel like I am left with some questions and mixed feelings. I understand now that I probably should have read the other books in this universe but at the start of this book didn’t realize that was the case. I assumed it was a stand alone.

I did enjoy the book it was beautifully written and kept me entranced. I feel if I had some more background maybe I would have understood more. I would suggest doing that before this book it would be an injustice not to as this writer is superb.

Vivienne Farrow is a selective mute who uses sign language to communicate. When her stepfather hires Thomas Walsh to interpret (and spy) on her, Vivienne is resolved to drive him away. Vivienne’s secret is that when she speaks aloud, a horrible fate happens to the person whose ear she whispers into. As Thomas and Vivienne get to know each other, they form a twisted bond. How far will Vivienne go to free herself of the thing that lurks in her reflection?

I Am Made of Death was impossible to put down! This book is spooky, romantic, and has such an interesting take on possession. Kelly Andrew writes descriptions that fill you with both horror and awe at the beauty. Vivienne and Thomas have fantastic chemistry! I love how they were tightly bonded and yet also kept the other completely on their toes. I love Kelly Andrew’s work and enjoyed how characters from previous books made cameos. I can't wait to read what she writes next!

I Am Made of Death is perfect for readers seeking a blend of horror and romance, bodyguard romance, and vivid writing.

Thank you so much to Kelly Andrew, Scholastic Press, and NetGalley for a free ARC in exchange for an honest review.

For publisher: My review will be posted on Goodreads, Amazon, Storygraph, and Barnes & Noble etc.

Thomas is offered a position as a paid interpreter for an heiress who exclusively signs, but the gig is a bit more than he initially thought. He’s also expected to accompany Vivienne everywhere she goes and report back to her father of anything unusual.

Vivienne is not to deviate from her routine. She is not to go anywhere without permission. She hasn’t spoken a word since she went missing on a trip when she was a young.

Vivienne’s voice is fatal. And the face she sees in the mirror isn’t her own.

🩰 💀 🩰 💀 🩰 💀 🩰 💀 🩰 💀 🩰

I do feel that this should be marketed as an interconnected standalone and I would suggest reading The Whispering Dark before reading I Am Made of Death. So many times I wished there was more world building and so many times I felt like there were absurd plot jumps. I’ve gathered that a lot of the world building and gaps in plot were likely explained in The Whispering Dark.

I am looking forward to reading The Whispering Dark and revisiting I Am Made of Death afterward!

Thank you to Scholastic Press, Kelly Andrew, and NetGalley for an advance copy.

I'm so sad I got this demon flu last week and took so long to finish the last quarter of this book! I already know so many of my students are going to be obsessed with Vivienne and Thomas’ story once I grab a physical copy of this book. A contemporary horror story with a FMC who has an attitude on her but is still loved unconditionally by a sweetie pie protector? A teenage girl who’s a monster in control of death? Yes, this is the protagonist that they need!

In this “bubblegum horromantasy” we meet Thomas, a golden retriever of a MMC who’s down on his luck and $can’t say no$ to a job offer from some rich old man in Connecticut. He’s hired to provide live-in interpreter services for Vivienne, who has selective mutism after… *something* happened in her past. Rich stepdad has nefarious reasons beyond wanting to communicate with Vivienne, and that’s the mystery that kept this book going for me. It’s impossible to stress enough how much Vivienne does not want Thomas spying on her and her friends and reporting back to her dad--but it goes beyond a teenager not wanting someone in her business. What’s she hiding? What is she trying to do with the occult? She’s quick witted, sassy, and not afraid to be a hellcat. Thomas is doomed from the start.

The writing in this novel is gorgeous. Romantic. Atmospheric. The horror is beautifully described while also being spine chilling. Sometimes, though, I was so distracted by the gorgeous details that I was lost in the actual plot, which could drag at times. I felt the pacing was a bit uneven, with too much information in some places, but then not enough in others. For example, I would’ve loved more information about Thomas and his past, his friendships with Colton and Lane, and his time in college. If that was sprinkled in the beginning chapters I would’ve eaten them up even more. I wish I’d read Andrew’s previous books because I know I would love them too, and apparently there are backstories of some of these characters in those two novels. Ah well!

A bubblegum horror indeed! While Vivienne is wrapped in gorgeous pink satin bows, a hungry monster is wrapped around her very bones and has dictated every step of her life since she was four. Enter Thomas Walsh, a stubborn and handsome bodyguard/interpreter who will do anything to protect Vivienne, even from herself. This story was a delight as a horror, but poignant as an exploration of looking inward and loving yourself wholly. I loved the return to the world of The Whispering Dark, and look forward to anything Andrew writes!

This was really really good. Kelly knows how to write men that see a messed up and girl and say SHES MINE. The relationship between Vivienne and Thomas was the shining star of this book. They were so so fun to read. This had a lot more body and botanical horror than I expected, but the prose was great and gross (positive). The plot dragged at times, but overall was engaging. I loved all the cameos from her previous books, it was fun to revisit those characters. Overall, I had a good time with this.

after his father’s death, thomas walsh had to grow up quickly, taking on odd jobs to support his family, including his gravely ill mother. but the position as interpreter for an heiress who exclusively signs might turn out to be the oddest job yet. it pays well, so thomas is eager to accept, but vivienne farrow seems determined to break him. vivienne has had selective mutism since she went missing in red rock canyon at four years old. anyone who hears her voice suffers a horrible death. vivienne wants to be free of the monster inside of her, and when she finds someone willing to perform a surgical exorcism, she has her way out…she just has to get rid of thomas first.

i will be a kelly andrew fan until the day i die, so as soon as i learned she had a new book coming out, i quickly became obsessed! even better, this book featured selective mutism representation. this is (partially) what i did my senior capstone on, so i love seeing it represented, as long as it was represented accurately (as it was in this book). vivienne’s story was so interesting. the way her backstory unfolded to eventually put her present story into perspective was done excellently and handled with care. i also loved thomas; characters who had to grow up too quickly will forever have a special place in my heart. i love how he never backed down from the challenges thrown at him.

quick note: though this is a standalone, i would highly recommend reading the whispering dark before this book, since characters from that show up here!

overall, this was a wonderful exploration of autonomy, trauma, and fighting back—all wrapped in a cute, pink bow. i highly recommend this book!

This is probably my favorite book of Andrew's and that is saying a lot considering how much I adore her previous books. To call Andrew an "auto buy" author for me doesn't go far enough. She is an auto-obsess, buy every special edition and beg for a signed copy type of author for me. I'm not even something that likes horror! I'm a scared cat! But there's something about Andrew's haunting prose and legit terrifying writing that keeps me coming back for more every time.

Andrew called this "bubblegum horror" on a recent social media post and I'm obsessed with that as a descriptor. This is horror wrapped in a beautiful and romantic bow. When the phrase, "if he could, he would" is thrown around, they are absolutely talking about Thomas Walsh in this book. Everything he did here was an absolute swoon. I love how this book unwrapped itself and I got to discover all of its sharp and beautiful edges. Vivienne Farrow hasn't said a word since she went missing when she was four years old. No one knows what happened to her out there in the dark, only that the sound of her voice is as deadly as a poison. When Thomas shows up, hired by her father as her interpreter, the two begin to fall for one another, but Vivienne has plans of her own. Plans that Thomas could completely ruin for both her and the darkness creeping inside of her.

Andrew's writing is creepy and lovely and immersive and I am forever obsessed with her. Do yourself a favor and pick this up to be just as bewitched and terrified as me!

Thank you so much to Scholastic and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an early copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Dual POV, Forbidden Romance, Touch Her & Die,

Once again Kelly Andrew has created an immersive, hauntingly intense romance fueled with yearning and all the protectiveness. The way Thomas Walsh is equally attracted to and exasperated by Vivienne peak book boyfriend behavior, not to mention the lengths he goes to protect her.

Phenomenal read — sucked me in from literally page 1 and I finished it in two days.

To what lengths would you go to protect yourself? What about someone you care about? I feel like our two main characters are in constant “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” scenarios.

I went into this book blind (other than the synopsis) and I’m really glad I did. Every single page is packed with something to hold your interest and press on to “one more chapter.”

When you are the monster, how can you trust someone will come to save you. I Am Made of Death is the third book set in the world of The Whispering Dark (TWD). It is a stand alone, however a few of the characters from TWD make and appearance and play a role so as a reader you may want to read that first. I haven’t read TWD and was able to follow the story fine, however I think I would have been even more invested if I had read the other story as well. I would describe this as romantic horror-lite.

Thomas needs this job. That is what he reminds himself every time Vivienne cuts him deeply or alternatively makes him want to protect her with everything he is. But, Thomas needs this job and the enormous paycheck that comes with it. He has been most of the sole support for his family since his dad died and his mom has been so sick. So he reminds himself that the girl is just a job. He shouldn’t look at her too long. He shouldn’t get too involved with whatever trouble she is in. And he definitely should under no circumstances kiss the girl that can cut him to the bone with signed word. Thomas knows Vivienne has a secret; she might be in trouble and it looks like Thomas is going to be the fool that risks himself to help a girl he just met and can’t stop thinking about.

Vivienne is a monster, or close enough to one that she might as well be. She hasn’t spoken in years. Bad things happen when she speaks out loud, people plead and beg and die. So she is selectively mute, because she doesn’t want to be a monster, she only ever wanted to be a girl. Vivienne has maybe found a way to get the monster out of her. It is dangerous and she will need some people with very specific skills to help her. She will also need to ditch the Thomas, the interpreter/babysitter her step-father has hired. But, that is getting harder everyday she spends with the boy who looks almost as broken as her in some ways. What if she could just tell him everything, what if he could help her, what if she kills him.

She wondered if he’d weep if she told him what she thought of him, right out loud. Sometimes they did. Weep, that is. They begged. They crawled. They foamed at the mouth and writhed on the floor. All she had to do was scream. She was a piteous Medusa, her mouth full of snakes. A cursed siren, her voice full of venom.

My first Kelly Andrew book was Blood of my Bones and it was such a strange story with a haunting and beautifully written prose I wanted to see what else Kelly Andrew could do with that writing style. I was intrigued by the siren call premise of I Am Made of Death and forbidden love, it seemed like another winner for me. I enjoy the flowery and descriptive writing style that adds to the gothic feels of the book. Vivienne and Thomas both capture my heart with the dual PoVs and struggles the reader experiences through there eyes. Vivienne isn’t a really loveable character, all jagged spikes and harsh actions. But seeing her through Thomas’ eyes, you could see how she was just a girl who wanted someone to be on her side, instead of just thinking of how to use the monster she could be.

Vivienne Farrow wasn’t for loving. She wasn’t warm or sweet or good. Most days, she wasn’t even sure she was human.

The story was captivating and I had a hard time putting it down. It was a good tease of mystery and horror to discover Vivienne’s past and how she became made of death. The resolution went very differently from what I expected, however that is a good thing and I liked the direction the author took with the story. While the horror aspect was interesting I was here for the prose and the romantic interest aspects of the story and they delivered.

Recommended for anyone looking to try out horror as a new genre. The combination of the love story, horror aspects and prose make it an easy entry point.