Sam is in a rut, despairing of finding true love after his long term boyfriend conveniently gets back together with his ex-husband and moves away. His 35th birthday is coming soon and he is shocked to find that his mother, Gloria, is keeping him to a promise extracted from him after a disastrous prom experience. She will be in charge of his dating for the next few months from profiles, dates and appearance. He finds that she is invading every part of his life from his friends to his favourite hangout. I just loved this colourful story, Sam's mother is amazingly larger than life but has her heart in the right place and just wants to get even closer to her son, if that's possible. I was swept up in the story and was really interested in what was going to happen next with Gloria’s crazy plans.

Thank you NetGalley and publisher for this arc!

This book was great! I loved the writing style and I loved the characters and their chemistry. I laughed a lot on this book. It was a very good romcom!

I just finished My Mother's Ridiculous Rules for Dating, and I have a huge smile on my face. I'm not going to lie. It took me a hot minute to get into a rhythm with this book. Well, in reality, I never found my flow. Maybe I was in a reading slump, but I had to push myself to read it every day, something that doesn't usually happen. However, I am so glad that I read it all the way through.

It's categorized as a romance, but it's a romance with your own identity. Yes, there is a couple that you root for throughout the whole story, and they do end up finding their HEA in the end, but the book is so much more than that.

This book is about self-acceptance and self-confidence. It's about putting yourself out there and believing in what you can do and who you can be. Sam, our MC, is surrounded by a group of people who all see his worth, how wonderful he is, and the potential he has to achieve his dreams. Sam, unfortunately, is the only one who doesn't see it, and he doesn't believe he deserves it. Until you can learn to love yourself, you can't expect anyone else to love you.

Gloria, or Glory, is a wonderful mother. I had so many laugh-out-louds (literally snorting while I was laughing) because of her. First off, she is so authentic. She is that mother that we all know, hopefully all have. There are so many relatable things that she says and does. She is also a FIERCE advocate for equality and acceptance. At the end of the day, Sam is her son and she loves him unconditionally. She does everything she can to demonstrate and advocate for who he is, the right to love whoever you want, without judgement. Not only is she an advocate for the LGBTQA+, but she is also an ally.

I recommend this book to anyone who needs a reminder to love themselves and accept others or just wants a good laugh.
Thank you to NetGalley, Hera, and Canelo Publishing, and Philip William Stover for the opportunity to read this ARC copy.

A new author to me, Philip William Stover offers a m34m romcom where an overbearing mother decided whom her son should date, in his latest release, My Mother's Ridiculous Rules for Dating. I enjoyed parts of the book and I liked the main character. But his mother was just too over-the-top with her intimate questions and knowledge about her son's sex life and the LGBTQ realm. It made for squirmy and hilarious moments, but as a result, it also made me feel too removed from Sam as a man searching for love. I think the humor in this occasion made me unable to see any heat and feel the same desire to see him happily coupled up. But the story was interesting, and the dialog had some great moments. Slow in some areas, a bit of excess in the middle. I ended up with an average rating but I'd definitely read another book to see if it's just the one novel and overall difference in author/reader style. Give it a chance tho - lots of strong moments.

"My Mother's Ridiculous Rules for Dating" by Philip William Stover is an absolute joy—a rom-com that blends family drama, quirky humor, and heartfelt romance into a captivating read.

Sam’s journey of personal growth, supported by his friends and his well-meaning mother, is both touching and hilarious. His navigation of a difficult past relationship, aided by a swoon-worthy love interest, adds a delightful blend of warmth and humor.

Although the mother’s antics might occasionally be over-the-top and make you roll your eyes, she perfectly captures the essence of a meddling mom who genuinely wants the best for her son. Her relentless online research to support her queer son and his community adds a hilarious and endearing touch to her character.

What really stood out to me was the diverse group of characters around Sam, which many gay men will find both familiar and relatable.

Overall, this book is a wonderful mix of comedy and heart, showcasing how much growth is possible with a solid support system—if you’re willing to embrace it and believe in yourself.

I found myself laughing quite a bit through this book! It is one of those fun, lighthearted romances that will uplift your soul. Sam is one of those characters that readers connect with easily. The book also follows a theme of self love and acceptance.

I've been having some misses with ARCs lately, and I'm glad to say this wasn't one of them. Yes, the rom-com OTT-ness got to be a bit much for me at times, and I wanted to pitch Sam's mom out the window. But when this book was good, it was really, really good.

I highlighted several paragraphs in one scene, because they were so powerful. I'm not going to type them all in here. ;) But: "'Bragging is showing off to people or over-inflating yourself. This is not bragging. This is believing in yourself. There's a difference.'" That scene was gold.

Spoiler: I did wish the author had had Sam make his final choice without Paul turning up and showing himself (again) to be a horrible person. I wanted Sam to have the strength to make that choice by believing in himself (see above) rather than having it thrust on him.

The use of (some) British punctuation styles in a book set in New York was a bit odd, and there were plenty of typos that I hope will be fixed before publication. But what else is new?

If you can handle rom-com antics, I don't think you'll go wrong with this story.

My thanks to the publisher/NetGalley for an advance copy of this book.

This is what I want from romantic novels!

I really connected to Sam, his struggles and his personality and his love for all things classical Hollywood. His relationship with Paul was very recognizable and his romance with Finn was beautifully built up.

Reading this book felt like a warm hug - like a breath of fresh air. It was so nice to read a queer love story that was not YA, and that grappled with real questions of what community means and what it means to be oneself.

Omar, Glory, Kai and co were a delightful bunch of side characters and despite it being the soft, comforting world of a rom-com, it fely very real. Glory reminded me of a mix of the Golden Girls and the mum from Queer as Folk. I also really enjoyed the elements of craft and arts that queer communities can really thrive in.

Some might say this book does hit you over the head with social justice and queer activism but quite frankly, I think it's something we can and should revel in, especially now.

Thank you Hera and Netgalley for the digital ARC.

A quirky story about a man who has been lost in love and is now being guided by his mother. The premise here is kind of funny, but I’m left with the feeling that Sam really didn’t like himself and nothing in the plot made me understand him. I think I needed a little bit more of backstory?

I appreciated the author’s explanation of how difficult it can be to be confident in your artistic work. This felt like a message that would resonate with many.

I'd have stopped reading by the 6% mark if it weren't for my moral obligation to send a review. At that point, the main character changes his mind about working with the love interest in a matter of minutes, after kicking up a fuss about it, because... because the romance needed to happen, I suppose?

Don't get me wrong, the prose is competent and there are some genuinely profound quotes sprinkled throughout. For example, ‘Our connection is strong but not always deep, and there’s a difference’ at 54% really hit me, because it was an aspect of the MC and his mum's relationship that was perfectly captured in the story so far. It rang very true; and what an incredible display of maturity and self-awareness by the MC!

Another thing I enjoyed, but which unfortunately overlaps with my complaints, is the theme of queerness as a lifestyle and the influence of our being queer on our everyday lives. I found myself interested by the MC's take on this but couldn't let myself trust the book in its handling of the subject. By then, I had realised that despite the MC being 35 years old, this book had firmly claimed a parcel of the uninspired-YA territory and did not want to move beyond its borders.

Everything about this book reads YA-with-an-extra-100-pages, from the paint-by-numbers plot (nothing in there surprised me—nothing), to lowbrow comedy dialogue (‘poo-poo’ appears 4 times, ‘pooh’ twice), to general nonsense (‘this contract is legally binding’—excuse me?). I couldn't see the chemistry between the main character and love interest, I considered seppuku every time the mother appeared on page, the best friend was a no-personality prop to enable the mother's abuse, and the coffee-shop-found-family people were just brouhaha in the background. Having everyone behaving like a caricature of toddlers on cocaine is not my kind of humour, although I encounter it often enough to recognise there might be a market for it, somewhere.

It would be unfair of me to complain without explaining why this book did not work for me, so pardon me for the following list:

- The almost-good themes: What is queer culture and how much should it impact our existence? What parts of our identities let us claim what part of the culture? Where does our queerness's influence start and end in our lives, or does it truly seep into every aspect of our existence? Is it base animal behaviour to let our sexual preferences define who we are, or is it an unavoidable phenomenon born from the relief of finding a community you belong to while being a persecuted minority? You won't find answers to this in there. But we come close to a semblance of reflection on the matter through the MC's eyes. Throughout the novel, he has to challenge the views of his mother (her obsession with queer culture), the LI (whose entire raison d'être is queer-activism-or-die) and his ex (a traitor who attends hateful political events to eat canapés). By its end, the book doesn't really resolve any of these threads, doesn't really say who it agrees with, although it is implied the MC will have to be more politically involved considering the LI and mother are such great forces in his life. I was disappointed it didn't expand on the subject, and what was shown lacked finesse. The cishets don't plan their lives around the fact they're cishet, so the MC made great points... But the book commits to its brain-dead levity by having characters gaslight the MC, throw a joke then move on;

- The love interest: A lot of telling us he's the second coming of Jesus Christ without any showing. Art *is* activism by nature, so his one-chord opinion doesn't make him special. Girlie is not ending homophobia by walking around with an expensive camera (even during business meetings apparently!). I found his personality uninspiring and flat. I think this could have been helped if the MC and LI had actual deep conversations on the aforementioned themes, rather than a montage of quick comedy sketches. I reached my Ben-Affleck-stress-smoking era when they interviewed the ‘Russian immigrant’, what with the blatant clichés, broken English(!) and vapid activism;

- The best friend: That's classic YA and not really this book's fault, but the MC's best friend only served as a wall to bounce lines off of. His purpose was robotically telling the MC ‘you're so great’ and ‘your mum is right’ every time the MC looked in his general vicinity. He really didn't even do particularly well as the audience stand-in, considering his support of the mum;

- Which brings us to the worst character of the book. Intellectually, I understand she's supposed to be a Fran Fine type of mum—overbearing, overinvolved, messy but ultimately charming and loving. This did not translate on page at all. Her relentless commenting on her son's romantic and sexual life was creepy. Her co-opting her son's sexuality as her own was not okay (wanting to attend gay pride is cute, though she made it all about herself; wearing a ‘we're queer’ T-shirt? Not cute.) Her constant berating of her son's political involvement (or lack thereof), critiquing of everything he did, wore, said—the guilt-tripping, gaslighting, refusing any kind of talkback. The ‘I know what you feel/who you are better than you do’ subtext, using him as a complacent doll... All of this was horrific emotional abuse, and it's never properly addressed.

The book almost did something with it: why her thirty! five! years old! son! still lets her get away with it is masterfully explained (one of the things I enjoyed the most about this book). The MC has no self-esteem, he never had the chance to build it up—why bother having opinions of your own when your mother already has so many? Making his own choices isn't required per se, his mother has it handled! At one point, the MC challenges her: ‘You must really think I’m a loser’ because she can't trust him to do anything the way she wants him to do it and mercilessly micromanages him. However, she just strolls past the accusation, ‘That’s what mothers do.’ (no, it's not! it's really not!) and this never comes up again. I'd go so far as to say she's proved right at every turn, so much so that by the end of the novel, the happily ever after is really owed to her meddling. And none of that came at any cost, either, because her relationship with her son is intact and everyone absolutely loves her. Great.

The only character I found endearing was the MC. But the book was actively working against him and I couldn't sustain any interest for long. For all the good points he made, he still truly felt like a Victorian ingénue, showing an unfathomable lack of agency and willpower.

I chose to withhold this review from Goodreads for now, as there appears to be no other rating of the book on the platform yet and I wouldn't want to hurt its chances of finding its audience.

Ultimately, I just wanted this book to be something else. I am, however, intrigued by the author's brilliant nuggets of introspection through the MC, and will definitely check out their future work... My only hope is for the characters to be adults, for the comedy to be reasonable and for the problematic faves to be held accountable.

I just finished reading "My Mother’s Ridiculous Rules for Dating" by Philip William Stover and it was such a delightful read! The book was described as an uplifting fake dating, opposites attract rom-com, and it definitely lived up to that description.

The story follows Sam, a heartbroken writer who feels rejected and lost professionally. When his mother, Gloria, reminds him of a childhood bet that she made to oversee his love life if he's still single at 35, Sam reluctantly agrees to let her set him up with dates. Despite feeling uncertain about his mother's zany choices, Sam goes along with it.

Additionally, during this dating spree, Sam meets Finn, an artist with whom he collaborates for work. They hit it off instantly but also challenge each other, leading Sam to question his choices, self-identity, and beliefs.

The novel features an inclusive cast of characters and focuses on themes of growth, self-love, and finding one's family and voice. The humorous yet sincere approach made me eager to explore the author's other works. Overall, this book was a breath of fresh air in what can feel like a grim world.

I want to express my gratitude to NetGalley and Hera for providing me with the heartwarming ARC.